Kobojunkie:
Good question!

Just giving advice to consider the risk. If he considers the risk is worth it.
Why not.


In my own opinion, children a divorcee is no go area.

I understand your concerns but last i checked noone inherits divorce. It's not encoded in human DNA. That girl may have made a conscious decision not to let it happen to her own home.

I know this is very challenging but my advice is to pay attention to her character and not that of her parents. And i am working on the premise that your character is near perfect as well. Otherwise, yes, history can or will repeat itself.

Nothing concern the girl with her divorced parents. Everybody get him own destiny. If we all followed our parents path in life I would have been a native doctor.

gidjah:
Life is more spiritual than you think oga.Confirm from her history if there are divorce or Polygamy cases and if that's true ,I bet you , it runs in the blood .it is very spiritual no matter the excuses any of the party might Wana give .Even if it is not a pattern in the family,IT HAS ALREADY STARTED and likely to CONTINUE UNLES she is ready to stand her ground both physically and spiritually too. I understand few children here without the knowledge of spiritual reality would come out for me,but that's not a problem ,we would always say the truth as it appears.

Everything is spiritual to you folks that's why Nigeria is revolving around in circle.

Divorce isn't coded in parents gene that will be transmitted to their offspring.

Divorce effects is psychological, that's why you folks should be careful with your traits and behaviours once you have kids.

A wife beater kids have the tendencies of growing up and beating their own wives. Same thing with a nagging and disrespectful mother. it's all psychological. Be careful of what you do at the presence of your kids, cuz it's registered on their subconscious mind.

sniperr007:



People enter marriage with the plan to get married. They create scenarios and prepare their mind to divorce.

So yes. People enter marriage with intention to divorce.

Waooo, I wish you to experience that so that you will confirm your statements

cococandy:

For some magical reason it only affects the girl 🙄🙄

This topic is not for those that feeds on candy

Letsmeet:
Please everyone, what's your opinion on this?
Is it wise to date a young lady from a divorced home?
If She is very nice, quiet, respectful, the most understanding person in the world, doesn't even quarrel. Has a good job and many other good qualities.
But if her parents are divorced, and live in the same area, and she lives with both of them.
What is the likelihood of her divorcing in future? Anyone with similar experiences please?

What breaks his or her family might sometimes rears it ugly head to yours. But sometimes Children from a broken home vows that the same thing won’t break theirs. Good luck.

Dogalmighty17:
Women from divorced homes tend to also have failed marriages. If her mom could not make it work, there is little incentive for your woman to want to put in all it takes to make her marriage work.
These things tend to be a circle and it may be a pattern that runs in some families. Once divorce, child out of wedlock, drunkenness, gambling, murder, madness etc takes presence in a particular family, you tend to see it repeat across multiple generations. These things are very spiritual.

Always investigate the background of the person you want to marry. Some people should make excellent spouses but that negative family circle and pattern will always be fighting against them.

Hmmmmmmmmmm.

Good one.
I think you made lot of sense in this write up.

Did her parents divorced because their parents (her grandparents) divorced?

"I beg enter motor forget wetin Dem write for motor"

What if you enter a relationship with her and you become the reason for divorce, will you still blame her parents divorce for it.

gidjah:
Life is more spiritual than you think oga.Confirm from her history if there are divorce or Polygamy cases and if that's true ,I bet you , it runs in the blood .it is very spiritual no matter the excuses any of the party might Wana give .Even if it is not a pattern in the family,IT HAS ALREADY STARTED and likely to CONTINUE UNLES she is ready to stand her ground both physically and spiritually too. I understand few children here without the knowledge of spiritual reality would come out for me,but that's not a problem ,we would always say the truth as it appears.

What sort of imaginative assertion is this? How can divorce run in the blood? Spiritual? What truth? I hope people don't really take what they see on here everyday at face value.

gidjah:
I gave answer to his questions but might not have gone as plain as you did sir.(I only went further to help him see why some of this happened)its not a scientific matter my bro ,science keeps blinding man to the reality of a celestial system ,no mind them but deep within them ,in Thier various privacies,they secretly acknowledge such.i have some of them here with me

Ur statement should be d other way round actually

Yes.
Whatever is happening in the family you marry from will more than likely happen to you unless you and your husband or wife made a serious effort to brake it.

Worriedwife:
It looks like kids 4rm divorced homes are only females. What of the male kids from divorced homes,,should they be avoided for marriage?

I don't think the OP is singling out female children from broken homes for attack. It seems that he is passing through this situation. That's why he is seeking for our opinions.
For me, one should be careful getting into relationship with anyone from a broken home irrespective of the person's sex.

tumababa:


Ur statement should be d other way round actually

hahahaha why would you say so ?? I speak from ... One witn open eyes ,(if you get that ).I know we all are Africans mo be oyibo.oyibo man scientificalizes everything but he him sef knows that there's another kinda world out there more real than this our transcient. Been in the ENGINEERING FIELD opened my eyes bro,make we just keep quiet. @tumababa it's been long o , spoke with you last should be 8 years ago under Jonathan and early Buhari for phone matters then.Gadgets and accessories including locking and unlocking were still very cheap then .How's work sir ?

Ex0rrcist:

What sort of imaginative assertion is this? How can divorce run in the blood? Spiritual? What truth? I hope people don't really take what they see on here everyday at face value.

I thought you are an exorcist ?what do you guys do in your coven ?don't you guys enchant people ,don't you guys bewitch ,don't you guys hypnotise ?? Are this also face value things ,are they imaginative practices ?I do not have space for children abeg.

We are in the world of uncertainties. Where did ladies whose parents never divorced learnt divorce from when they divorced? I addressed this to women from biblical perspective that says a wise woman will build her house but a foolish one will pull hers' down. Men also could toy the part of erring father, but with a good mother his life could be molded positively.

No rule, no mathematics, your question has to do with human tendencies that has a lot of other determining factors beyond the marital status of parents either divorced or separated, intact or loose...But you determine to make your hone work despite all odds for the sake of your children.

Offpoint1:

Everything is spiritual to you folks that's why Nigeria is revolving around in circle.

Divorce isn't coded in parents gene that will be transmitted to their offspring.

Divorce effects is psychological, that's why you folks should be careful with your traits and behaviours once you have kids
A wife beater kids have the tendencies of growing up and beating their own wives. Same thing with a nagging and disrespectful mother. it's all psychological. Be careful of what you do at the presence of your kids, cuz it's registered on their subconscious mind.

.no one ever said such is coded in human genes oga .Oyibo man that lectured you into this scientific theories also knows there a celestial part to this things. He knows that pretty well but will come out to hide it from you who is a practitioner so as feed on you and lord it over you. Go and check your family is there are no patterns .,.come up here and be straight .I rest my case

Brush1:


You are wrong.

thank you sir ?? Life is more physical than spiritual right ? I am not talking to people with only cerebral capacity here sir, ... I speak to people with open eyes. Eyes that LOOK ARE MANY , BUT EYES THAT SEE. are very few . If you know you know

Kobojunkie:
Most men in Nigeria who went on to abandon their wives in marriage did not themselves come from divorced homes. And yes, abandonment/informal divorce is a major issue among Nigerian men to the point that it has been criminalized. So, is it only people from divorced homes that eventually go on to divorce their partners? No!

So, whether you are married to a woman or man who is from a background that does not include divorce, the chances of divorce remain. You cannot completely eliminate it, particularly as staying in unhealthy marriages becomes increasingly unacceptable.

aunty, brother, sister.... The topic has nothing to do with men running away from toxic and disrespectful wives for their own safety oooh.... I know one that has been running for his life for over 5 years now.

Read the topic again.... It's about women from divorced homes and the likelihood of divorcing after marriage. This is the fear of many.

I feel there is a valid point to it, especially for the girl child who must be taught who a true man really is by her father.
Her father is the first man in her life. Her father is saddled with the responsibilities of showing and letting her know who is a MAN and how to treat her husband as a man rather than a woman.

A single or divorced mother can never teach her genuinely about the who a true man is without bias.

She won't hesitate to demonize men and create a mixed web of hatred, anger and confusion about men on the innocent girl child. She will only grow up to be her mom and any unfortunate man that marries her will end up receiving all the bitterness, hate, anger and frustration she was taught about men.

Single mothers and divorced women should never raise a girl child. Because, they will never stop demonizing men.

Men this is for you, Only a father can teach his daughter/ girl child the definition of a true man. There is no two ways about it.

Men bond with your daughters, show them who we are, teach them how beautiful we can be as men, we are not monsters. We love respectful, caring and good women. Teach them manners, teach them that they are home builders, they are homes makes.

Don't marry a single mother's or divorced woman's daughter for your own sanity, wellbeing and peace of mind.

Girls from broken homes are toxic, run o!

frozen70:


Waooo, I wish you to experience that so that you will confirm your statements

I don't think people resume a new job with the mindset to get fired. They don't create scenarios of things they will do or happen then they get fired before they resume the new job.
as you think, so you are. You can't be thinking divorce before marriage and expecting not to get divorce.

When they prepare their mind for divorce and stuff, even if their partner isn't wired to make mistake, they unconsciously react in ways that makes their partners react in ways that will lead to divorce in the end.
Eg: if a guy believes all ladies are not loyal. He will not treat his wife with respect cos he is preparing for her to mess up. This action can push her to the arms of someone else and when it happens, he will see a reason to justify himself.
Forgetting that he created the opportunity for such event to happen with his mindset and actions.

If you want to get married. Both partners should Remove divorce from the table. Come with the growth mindset and sincere intentions to make the relationship work & grow.

But not the exit plan people bring into marriage and hope it last.

Broken homes effects can be great

The girl grew up with the mindset of females control

May become a source of attraction to be unsubmissive

Two ogas cannot drive same time.

Letsmeet:
Please everyone, what's your opinion on this?
Is it wise to date a young lady from a divorced home?
If She is very nice, quiet, respectful, the most understanding person in the world, doesn't even quarrel. Has a good job and many other good qualities.
But if her parents are divorced, and live in the same area, and she lives with both of them.
What is the likelihood of her divorcing in future? Anyone with similar experiences please?

Divorce is a very bad thing to occur in a family. Divorce has both physical and mental effects on the children. You have to understand that the motive for Divorce is different between Man and woman.

For instance, if the girls mother initiated the divorce, she has automatically shown her female children that once the marriage is uncomfortable, there is a way out. Furthermore, she has unintentionally shown her male children that women do not marry for love, rather marriage is transactional for women. It means that the day you stop "being a man" irrespective of the reason (poor health, job loss, bad business transaction etc) your wife will Divorce you.

Men hardly initiate Divorce. Women always think that there is something perfect outside their matrimonial home.
Women from divorced families no matter how good their qualities are, know only two things;
1) SURVIVAL
2) DIVORCE IS THE WAY OUT FROM MARITAL PROBLEMS.

Please in all you do, avoid such girls.

N/B : The only reason I support Divorce is in the case of domestic violence. No union is worth your life.

jaxxy:


No married for years with grown children about to finish highschool, 2nd daughter happily married also.

These are close family friends.

Coming from a divorce family doesn't mean u will have such problem unless u urself no get sense.

There are people from parents together who get divorced based on their personal ideology or poor judgment. Many of them are on Nairaland in the romance section.

Divorce is not hereditary.

so it hasn't occured to you before that even after 50years of marriage people still devorce

Letsmeet:
Please everyone, what's your opinion on this?
Is it wise to date a young lady from a divorced home?
If She is very nice, quiet, respectful, the most understanding person in the world, doesn't even quarrel. Has a good job and many other good qualities.
But if her parents are divorced, and live in the same area, and she lives with both of them.
What is the likelihood of her divorcing in future? Anyone with similar experiences please?

I don’t know what you people’s problem is for real! Nobody should get married na if they’re from polygamous homes cuz they can likely marry more than one person in future!

korede181:

so it hasn't occured to you before that even after 50years of marriage people still devorce

After 50 years u divorce? is that one divorce? divorce to do what after 50 years? when ur children dont born finish?

grandparents will divorce to do wetin again? pls we are talking about serious matters here not far fetched illusions.

Letsmeet:
Please everyone, what's your opinion on this?
Is it wise to date a young lady from a divorced home?
If She is very nice, quiet, respectful, the most understanding person in the world, doesn't even quarrel. Has a good job and many other good qualities.
But if her parents are divorced, and live in the same area, and she lives with both of them.
What is the likelihood of her divorcing in future? Anyone with similar experiences please?

Divorce or not, choose someone who has your best interest at heart. I guess Divorce case is common with the society we live in. If you see cases of developed countries, divorce cases is usually higher than Africa. You see even celebrities remarrying a divorcee.

frozen70:


No one enters into marriage to get a divorce

But situations and circumstances always lead to such

Children from divorced homes are not happy about it and will do everything possible to avoid being in that situation especially for the children

What caused divorce in home is the same thing another home managed to get through

So it's about individuals and their attitudes

I usually thought along this line until recently a married woman told me something very insightful and which convinced me view it in another light:

She said: No woman enters a marriage to get divorced, however they get divorced due to the advice they get from bad married/dovoreced/ single mothers who they keep and listen to as friends.

Let me give a scenario: a married woman is invited by her divorced friend/ a single mother that she should come to get together which will end at night. The married woman says that she must inform her husband to grant her permission.

The divorced/ single mum will likely reply this way: you are trying oh, me I can't take orders from any man to enjoy myself when I stressed out (which means the married friend is living under bondage.
Before you know it, the married friend starts rethinking if it's a good thing to seek permission before going out.
This repeatedly done, gives.room for lack of submission and consequently, divorce.
This is just one case out of many.

A man must know the friends his wife keeps; this is very important.

jidxin:
but what Bout the research that children from divorce home are also prone to divorce in their later life/marriage

Which research? Quote it let me see

Worriedwife:


I wasn't expecting a sensible response.

Ok, so women are the initiators of marriage in your sensible locality!

This gender battle will only set you aback in reasoning o. Just hear yourself!

Curiouscity:


If and only if she will be sincere. This is good start.

Op, If she is sincere and discusses it openly with you, telling you how such divorce could have been avoided, then go ahead.

But from experience, most girls from divorce home tend to be too secretive about the divorce, and even about their private life.


Discovery of this secrets, and sometimes lies give rise to trust issues, then if not well managed, divorce. The circle continues.

I agree with you

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CondenseMilk:
Divorce is very dangerous especially to the girl child.

Apart from the death of a partner, bringing up kids as a single parent should be highly discouraged

Reason for the divorce should be more important.....