₦airaland Forum

Efna55:
The village has fresh air and green foods, listen to your husband, besides the man is the head of the family..
Mainwhile if you're suffering from premature ejaculations and Erectile dysfunction watch this video and thank me later..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYPtgvwLkzw

madam don't let anyone deceive you that going to the village is bad though it depends the village but in my village many young men are doing well in the ok through business [b][/b]

dapadawee:
I have not read two line I have seen pride in you. God help your husband. Any woman that can open her mouth to say she is the one providing for the house are dangerous women. That line was not necessary you can make your point without it. Well I couldn't read beyond that line because I might find words more irritating than that.

Yet, the husband did not decide to avert the danger by providing for the house.

De play!

Eagba:
■ Olodi with I too know personality. I said Owerri west, because you see Owerri there and conclude it's Owerri. Owerri west is a local government area that different from Owerri. My part of Owerri west is a village. For your information, most parts of Scotland are considered villages

Again, I asked for the Village name, LGA, and State. Your post was

Eagba:
Caritas Owerri west

How did you expect me to interpret this? I plugged it directly into Google and that is what came up. A company listed as being under Owerrri. So, is the company your village or what?

momsloved:
Good afternoon everyone, pls I urgently need your advice and suggestions on this.

My husband has been out of job since towards the end of last year. Almost the same time I had my second baby. The truth is, the same me nursing my baby has been the same person struggling to provide for the home.

Knowing that he contributed to his lost of job. He goes to work late, different excuses, doing the job anyhow that the management had to fire him. This is the second job he's losing due to carelessness.
He wasn't still meeting up with responsibilities even when he had those jobs. He was always complaining of TP expenses, deduction due to late coming, his salaries was not benefiting us.

Our present accomodation of 250k, one bedroom apartment is expiring ending of next month and I don't know how we're going to pay for the rent. The previous rent I have always contributed when I had the money.
Presently I have no job. I left my job during delivery, but I'm hoping to start looking for job very soon. Yet, I'm not idle. I'm still trying with little business to cartar for the house.

The issue now is, he has arranged his stuffs preparing to relocate to the village and he wants us to go together because he can't afford to renew the rent.
I told him I can't go to the village with him, we are too young to start retiring to the village. What about good school for the children especially my first child? But he has decided to go without us, leaving us with the whole responsibilities.
I'm afraid, I can't afford everything here either. But going with him to the village is also very scary. A man who ignore us when there's nothing in the house, waiting for me to fix, how can I trust him and relocate with my two children to his village? I can't speak their language and it's an interior village, How do we survive there?
He's not even considering all these.
Pls, advice me on what to do. I'm really fed up.

what baffles me here is how ladies like u ended up with such men?
How and why such men exist?

I mean a man who failed to plan ahead of time
A man who sit down and watch fire burning his own house. He is planning to leave you behind and travel to the village alone if you refuse to join him. What are his plans to afford a better living for you and the children in the rural community?
If you remain in the city and let him go alone, divorce is likely start from there, just apply wisdom

This is not ordinary and I think village people are involved in this case

Senioradvocate:
what baffles me here is how ladies like u ended up with such men? How and why such men exist? I mean a man who failed to plan ahead of time A man who sit down and watch fire burning his own house. He is planning to leave you behind and travel to the village alone if you refuse to join him. What are his plans to afford a better living for you and the children in the rural community? This is not ordinary and I think village people are involved in this case

Actually, it is possible he was fine in the beginning but may be struggling with some mental issues he has yet to disclose to those around him. See, lack of honest communication between couples .... huge problem particularly where egos are involved.

If he has a good plan to follow when he gets to the village. You have to support him by all means. It's for better for worse they say. Atleast when things were good, the two of una enjoyed it. And you have really tried as well when things is now rough. But it's not a good time to give up as long as he is willing to put in handwork. He is your husband. You have to support him noni. Marriage no be moinmoin

Just accept your new title of a single mom and move on except you need another surprise of him verbally notifying you. It would be worse if you were the one that coarsed him into the union. Just start getting used to your status, marriage is not everything in life, mind your kids, thank God for them then move on to discover purpose if you have ever Heard of that before!

momsloved:
Good afternoon everyone, pls I urgently need your advice and suggestions on this.

My husband has been out of job since towards the end of last year. Almost the same time I had my second baby. The truth is, the same me nursing my baby has been the same person struggling to provide for the home.

Knowing that he contributed to his lost of job. He goes to work late, different excuses, doing the job anyhow that the management had to fire him. This is the second job he's losing due to carelessness.
He wasn't still meeting up with responsibilities even when he had those jobs. He was always complaining of TP expenses, deduction due to late coming, his salaries was not benefiting us.

Our present accomodation of 250k, one bedroom apartment is expiring ending of next month and I don't know how we're going to pay for the rent. The previous rent I have always contributed when I had the money.
Presently I have no job. I left my job during delivery, but I'm hoping to start looking for job very soon. Yet, I'm not idle. I'm still trying with little business to cartar for the house.

The issue now is, he has arranged his stuffs preparing to relocate to the village and he wants us to go together because he can't afford to renew the rent.
I told him I can't go to the village with him, we are too young to start retiring to the village. What about good school for the children especially my first child? But he has decided to go without us, leaving us with the whole responsibilities.
I'm afraid, I can't afford everything here either. But going with him to the village is also very scary. A man who ignore us when there's nothing in the house, waiting for me to fix, how can I trust him and relocate with my two children to his village? I can't speak their language and it's an interior village, How do we survive there?
He's not even considering all these.
Pls, advice me on what to do. I'm really fed up.

If your husband👨 go village told him that someone in naira land said this, if your husband go village it is finish for him and his career and Destiny.. Don't ever follo him if you do your will be contaminated.. Village is good but evils in the Village will not let your breathe.

eniolorunfe:
Your husband has indirectly told you that you’re on your own. So what kind of future do you want for yourself and your children? This should help influence your decision.

About two women I know who found themselves in this kind of situation stayed back in the city because of their children. As long as you’re ready to work hard and generate income for yourself and your children you will be fine. Start talking to everyone you know now as regards job, funds, alternative accommodation etc so that after your husband leaves you won’t be stranded.

Very well said. Especially, your first sentence/. statement.

Wow! I was in your shoes some years ago. I see myself in you. My dear, DO NOT RELOCATE TO THE VILLAGE with him if you wish a great future for yourself and your children. In my case,I stood my ground. He abandoned the kids and I and stayed away for almost two years. With absolute faith in God,I took up the challenge. Now he's back,but I'm moving ahead ahead. Kids doing well in school.
Nne, you can make it. Look steadfastly unto God. U can move out of that flat and live in a cheaper room. Luckily you have only one child now. I struggled with children. Where there's a will, there's a way You shall testify in Jesus Name.

momsloved:
Good afternoon everyone, pls I urgently need your advice and suggestions on this.

My husband has been out of job since towards the end of last year. Almost the same time I had my second baby. The truth is, the same me nursing my baby has been the same person struggling to provide for the home.

Knowing that he contributed to his lost of job. He goes to work late, different excuses, doing the job anyhow that the management had to fire him. This is the second job he's losing due to carelessness.
He wasn't still meeting up with responsibilities even when he had those jobs. He was always complaining of TP expenses, deduction due to late coming, his salaries was not benefiting us.

Our present accomodation of 250k, one bedroom apartment is expiring ending of next month and I don't know how we're going to pay for the rent. The previous rent I have always contributed when I had the money.
Presently I have no job. I left my job during delivery, but I'm hoping to start looking for job very soon. Yet, I'm not idle. I'm still trying with little business to cartar for the house.

The issue now is, he has arranged his stuffs preparing to relocate to the village and he wants us to go together because he can't afford to renew the rent.
I told him I can't go to the village with him, we are too young to start retiring to the village. What about good school for the children especially my first child? But he has decided to go without us, leaving us with the whole responsibilities.
I'm afraid, I can't afford everything here either. But going with him to the village is also very scary. A man who ignore us when there's nothing in the house, waiting for me to fix, how can I trust him and relocate with my two children to his village? I can't speak their language and it's an interior village, How do we survive there?
He's not even considering all these.
Pls, advice me on what to do. I'm really fed up.

hello.. Do you have parents?
Move to your parents place pending when you get yourself fixed.
Since you are not lazy dats all.
I was once in his situation.. The truth is when a man's salary cannot even last 3days after it was paid.. He will do anytin to leave the job and hv small rest of mind in that aspect so don't blame him much.. U may not undrstn dis but it's a hard decision to make wen a man is in the situation.
Don't go with him, he also needs time alone if possible just let him go.. After 2 to 3 months he will reset unless the love of his sons is not in him.

Beverlyjean:
For better for worse... the devil has totally taken over ur mentality...and u have sinned against God with this advice u have given... when judgement day comes most will cry blood cos u don't even know when u sinned

Lol Beverly. I've known your stance and mehn long before now. That man is about to make the worst mistake of his life by going into deeper misery. I saw what I saw in the vision of what would happen when he goes. So, relax. I'm a minister and much more.

Tommydare:
It is easier said than done.author=DeeBaDan post=123920667]Don't go. Let him go alone

You find a very cheap accomodation and do menial things you can do and make up to 50k per month. Like fried potato chips, fried plantain chips. Supply to shops. God will take care of you


When the chips are down, men drop professionalism.and go for what's available. If he can't forgo his pride and learn driver to get a car or bus he can drive and make daily income, divorce him. You don't need a loser as a mother of children. When things get tough, men ought to get tougher not fold up.


Going to village isn't proactive, productive, profitable or strategic. His inclinations as a man should tilt towards profitability not to recline to some nonsensical ideas. I travel.across multiple villages across the entire Nigeria. Let him go and try it for six months if he thinks the poverty in the city and that of the village are on the same.par

Shut up

iHateFraudsters:
Special adviser.

You just open mouth waaaaa dey talk nonsense.

Na you go give am car or bus to drive?

Or you think he'll just pull a car out of his ass?

The woman didn't know the husbands lazy behaviour before getting married?

@OP pack your bags and follow your husband to the village.

When you were shouting for better or worse upandan, what the hell were you expecting would be the worse?

Shut up


That's how the society keeps providing lunatics everywhere. Has he trained driving and walked into garages and car parks to seek driving jobs and didn't get ?

bukatyne:


Yet, the husband did not decide to avert the danger by providing for the house.

De play!

You saw that right?

I read it and shook my head

NoToPile:
You saw that right?

I read it and shook my head

Are you minding these demonic men who think emotional blackmail works?

Danger ko, live wire ni.

DeeBaDan:
Shut up


That's how the society keeps providing lunatics everywhere. Has he trained driving and walked into garages and car parks to seek driving jobs and didn't get ?

Idiot, special adviser

Ireportlive:




Growing up in the city , living in developed countries, I used to think village was all about what was shown in Nollywood

But I was wrong, a couple of years back I had a project in Kogi, Isanlu and this changed my perception

If he is going to the village, make sure it's for Agriculture or sales of agro commodity

This villagers live extremely cheap life, they use solar panels, eat cheap bush meat, buy fresh products, stay in cheap rented apartment, very serene quite almost dead environment, watch free to air Satellite TV



.

It depends on the village oh.

Some villages will shock u...some are even jungle.

Tyktoker:
■ Just accept your new title of a single mom and move on except you need another surprise of him verbally notifying you. It would be worse if you were the one that coarsed him into the union. Just start getting used to your status, marriage is not everything in life, mind your kids, thank God for them then move on to discover purpose if you have ever Heard of that before!

Who are you abeg!

Women are trying sha

vickydevoka:
He is not lazy oga. Give am job to see whether him no go do. Just say he didn't plan well B4 marriage. As a man , always take 90 percent decision of your life. Bcus when u are down , u are down alone

U didn't read the post right or u just read it without understanding.

Why una dey marry this kind men?

momsloved:
Good afternoon everyone, pls I urgently need your advice and suggestions on this.

My husband has been out of job since towards the end of last year. Almost the same time I had my second baby. The truth is, the same me nursing my baby has been the same person struggling to provide for the home.

Knowing that he contributed to his lost of job. He goes to work late, different excuses, doing the job anyhow that the management had to fire him. This is the second job he's losing due to carelessness.
He wasn't still meeting up with responsibilities even when he had those jobs. He was always complaining of TP expenses, deduction due to late coming, his salaries was not benefiting us.

Our present accomodation of 250k, one bedroom apartment is expiring ending of next month and I don't know how we're going to pay for the rent. The previous rent I have always contributed when I had the money.
Presently I have no job. I left my job during delivery, but I'm hoping to start looking for job very soon. Yet, I'm not idle. I'm still trying with little business to cartar for the house.

The issue now is, he has arranged his stuffs preparing to relocate to the village and he wants us to go together because he can't afford to renew the rent.
I told him I can't go to the village with him, we are too young to start retiring to the village. What about good school for the children especially my first child? But he has decided to go without us, leaving us with the whole responsibilities.
I'm afraid, I can't afford everything here either. But going with him to the village is also very scary. A man who ignore us when there's nothing in the house, waiting for me to fix, how can I trust him and relocate with my two children to his village? I can't speak their language and it's an interior village, How do we survive there?
He's not even considering all these.
Pls, advice me on what to do. I'm really fed up.

You are not fed up, you are afraid. But why? Your writeup suggested that he has hitherto been a responsible man cartering for the family; so, you were just assisting him. If as you said, he cannot afford even your rentage, with two children now, what do you want him to do? Unfortunately it seems you have not even have a full discussion with him yet. Why do you expect this online community to be the people that will tell you what you should have heard from him? Stay in town and become frustrated? Is it not his village he is returning too? Is that not the village he came to town from? Why do you think that returning to the village is equal to a death sentence? Pls be encouraged, fear will render you incapable of deciding well. Why not sit down with him and have a serious and inteligent discussion. Find out what his plans are and where you and the kids fit in. Dont make haste to decide agaist his decision. And dont just develop cold feet without verifying from him what the exact plan entails.

Kizzygentle:
■ U didn't read the post right or u just read it without understanding.

Some of them don't bother reading at all since their mind is made up on who is always at fault.

momsloved:
Good afternoon everyone, pls I urgently need your advice and suggestions on this.

My husband has been out of job since towards the end of last year. Almost the same time I had my second baby. The truth is, the same me nursing my baby has been the same person struggling to provide for the home.

Knowing that he contributed to his lost of job. He goes to work late, different excuses, doing the job anyhow that the management had to fire him. This is the second job he's losing due to carelessness.
He wasn't still meeting up with responsibilities even when he had those jobs. He was always complaining of TP expenses, deduction due to late coming, his salaries was not benefiting us.

Our present accomodation of 250k, one bedroom apartment is expiring ending of next month and I don't know how we're going to pay for the rent. The previous rent I have always contributed when I had the money.
Presently I have no job. I left my job during delivery, but I'm hoping to start looking for job very soon. Yet, I'm not idle. I'm still trying with little business to cartar for the house.

The issue now is, he has arranged his stuffs preparing to relocate to the village and he wants us to go together because he can't afford to renew the rent.
I told him I can't go to the village with him, we are too young to start retiring to the village. What about good school for the children especially my first child? But he has decided to go without us, leaving us with the whole responsibilities.
I'm afraid, I can't afford everything here either. But going with him to the village is also very scary. A man who ignore us when there's nothing in the house, waiting for me to fix, how can I trust him and relocate with my two children to his village? I can't speak their language and it's an interior village, How do we survive there?
He's not even considering all these.
Pls, advice me on what to do. I'm really fed up.

You knew during your dating that your man was a lazy Nigerian youth yet you opted to pitch tent with him for reasons best known to you. Now, it is not possible for you to entirely insulate yourself from the natural consequences of being stuck to a lazy bone. Going home is certainly not an attractive option to your man but it appears to him as the next preferable thing to suicide! Will you too go along that barely less than death route? NO. There are many intelligent ways to say a NO to your man's proposition without appearing confrontational. Allow him to go. It is not a death sentence to your marriage. You must double your resolve for survival in the city in every legitimate way. Cut costs of living: change rent, change school , whatever , and hustle more . If your husband is the first to make a headway in the village where he has chosen to go, he will return to improve the family. If you are the first to breakthrough in the city, it is also for good to reorder the family. Why must two perish together...
Spread the risk..

Ireportlive:




Growing up in the city , living in developed countries, I used to think village was all about what was shown in Nollywood

But I was wrong, a couple of years back I had a project in Kogi, Isanlu and this changed my perception

If he is going to the village, make sure it's for Agriculture or sales of agro commodity

This villagers live extremely cheap life, they use solar panels, eat cheap bush meat, buy fresh products, stay in cheap rented apartment, very serene quite almost dead environment, watch free to air Satellite TV



.

I have a relative that have spent more than half his life in the UK, him and his family have decided to relocate back to Bayelsa state. There's no matter how you will go to the village and you won't have a business idea to sustain you, that's what they said. I do hope they make the right decision. People dey kill themselves to japa and them wan dump the "good life" to live simple and affordable.

jnig:
You are not fed up, you are afraid. But why? Your writeup suggested that he has hitherto been a responsible man cartering for the family; so, you were just assisting him. If as you said, he cannot afford even your rentage, with two children now, what do you want him to do? Unfortunately it seems you have not even have a full discussion with him yet. Why do you expect this online community to be the people that will tell you what you should have heard from him? Stay in town and become frustrated? Is it not his village he is returning too? Is that not the village he came to town from? Why do you think that returning to the village is equal to a death sentence? Pls be encouraged, fear will render you incapable of deciding well. Why not sit down with him and have a serious and inteligent discussion. Find out what his plans are and where you and the kids fit in. Dont make haste to decide agaist his decision. And dont just develop cold feet without verifying from him what the exact plan entails.

All theories and no practicals. Let h8m go and live the live for one year. If he succeeds, she would join him.

momsloved:
Good afternoon everyone, pls I urgently need your advice and suggestions on this.

My husband has been out of job since towards the end of last year. Almost the same time I had my second baby. The truth is, the same me nursing my baby has been the same person struggling to provide for the home.

Knowing that he contributed to his lost of job. He goes to work late, different excuses, doing the job anyhow that the management had to fire him. This is the second job he's losing due to carelessness.
He wasn't still meeting up with responsibilities even when he had those jobs. He was always complaining of TP expenses, deduction due to late coming, his salaries was not benefiting us.

Our present accomodation of 250k, one bedroom apartment is expiring ending of next month and I don't know how we're going to pay for the rent. The previous rent I have always contributed when I had the money.
Presently I have no job. I left my job during delivery, but I'm hoping to start looking for job very soon. Yet, I'm not idle. I'm still trying with little business to cartar for the house.

The issue now is, he has arranged his stuffs preparing to relocate to the village and he wants us to go together because he can't afford to renew the rent.
I told him I can't go to the village with him, we are too young to start retiring to the village. What about good school for the children especially my first child? But he has decided to go without us, leaving us with the whole responsibilities.
I'm afraid, I can't afford everything here either. But going with him to the village is also very scary. A man who ignore us when there's nothing in the house, waiting for me to fix, how can I trust him and relocate with my two children to his village? I can't speak their language and it's an interior village, How do we survive there?
He's not even considering all these.
Pls, advice me on what to do. I'm really fed up.

Please post your account number and we will help you start a business, then encourage oga to come back. The kids need their father, quite difficult training children alone

I strongly advise you not to go. Let him go first and settle down. When he has gotten stuff sorted out then, he can table his request again with proof.

What about your own family? Don’t you have anyone that can help you especially with housing and maybe with your kids while you get a job and possibly find another accommodation.

DeeBaDan:
Don't go. Let him go alone

You find a very cheap accomodation and do menial things you can do and make up to 50k per month. Like fried potato chips, fried plantain chips. Supply to shops. God will take care of you


When the chips are down, men drop professionalism.and go for what's available. If he can't forgo his pride and learn driver to get a car or bus he can drive and make daily income, divorce him. You don't need a loser as a mother of children. When things get tough, men ought to get tougher not fold up.


Going to village isn't proactive, productive, profitable or strategic. His inclinations as a man should tilt towards profitability not to recline to some nonsensical ideas. I travel.across multiple villages across the entire Nigeria. Let him go and try it for six months if he thinks the poverty in the city and that of the village are on the same.par

Are you married?

dapadawee:
I have not read two line I have seen pride in you. God help your husband. Any woman that can open her mouth to say she is the one providing for the house are dangerous women.

Really, this is what we vomit when we are not ready to hear the truth.

That line was not necessary you can make your point without it. Well I couldn't read beyond that line because I might find words more irritating than that.

How would any sensible person be able to give an informed advice when they don't have detailed information? Swerve!

Thebest12:
Oga my village school teach pass private school way i day see for lag here . You people underates vilalages shall . I prefer my ville to this Lagos

When are you relocating? Easier said than done