₦airaland Forum

Ololade4:
Good day House.. I am an ardent Nairalander but I am using another identity to cover up..

It's almost over a year now that i started the journey with her, I met her parents 4 months ago, I was told by her day that thier daughter is not free( bride price things) normally... we talked it out and we decided to get marriage.. I am 35, she's 32. She has a 8 years old boy out of wedlock, the boy stays with her parent.. I don't have any problem with that, Single mother is not a disease.. we have being living together since March this year, just like a couple and i decided to tie the knot with her later in the year which we both agreed on.

So we both agreed to go for registry then normal engagement and rest the case.. she later changed her mind, she doesn't want the court registry anymore (i am not move with this anyway, but why? Is she having another secret affairs elsewhere, or maybe she's thinking she may leave if things go south, like she doesn't want to get into a legal marriage that will hinder her from having choice in the nearest future, because I don't understand..).. She only want Engagement, without the court registry for now.
Anytime her parents, especially her mom ask her about it in the wedding plan, she will tell her we will do it later in the future .
As a man in the first place I don't need to worry about this in the first place, because all this court marriage registration only favor the woman and I know most of them crave for it...

But she... What is she up to??

pocohantas:
I love that girl.



I hope other ladies can read and learn. The reason some men claim they don't want marriage or they have more to lose is because women carry it for head. Always fighting tooth and nail for (registry) marriage. So they sit back and allow you do all the work while acting like they did you a favour marrying you. Have you ever considered the fact that you would be the one needing to escape from an evil man in record time? Breaking head over a man's property even at the expense of your life.

This OP claims it favours women more but he is restless because he met a woman who has mastered her emotions. He wishes she were chasing him upandan for a legal wedding and flying to catch ring. He is bothered because he doesn't hold all the ACES.

Isn't this the kinda arrangement they claim to want online? #TEAMBABYMAMA? Why is OP worried and why the responses from his fellow men above?

Men want this marriage as much as you do if not more. If they hated marriage so much, they wouldn't be open to polygamy or rushing to marry another wife after a divorce or death of the first wife. No man keeps two (polygamy), even four of what he doesn't benefit from. They benefit heavily from marriage. In fact, after tasting marriage, they find it hard to stay alone again. Unlike women who would rather enjoy companionship without commitment.

Stop fighting these men over registry. Tell him you don't want. Let him be the one to create thread and beg you to sign those lines. Stop begging them to see the usefulness in marriage. Stop answering stupid NL questions like "what can you offer a man?" He has the option of remaining single or marrying a fellow man or new yam.

You are the prize.
If he isn't giving you same energy, disembark.

pongwa:
run

Ololade4:
Good day House.. I am an ardent Nairalander but I am using another identity to cover up..

It's almost over a year now that i started the journey with her, I met her parents 4 months ago, I was told by her day that thier daughter is not free( bride price things) normally... we talked it out and we decided to get marriage.. I am 35, she's 32. She has a 8 years old boy out of wedlock, the boy stays with her parent.. I don't have any problem with that, Single mother is not a disease.. we have being living together since March this year, just like a couple and i decided to tie the knot with her later in the year which we both agreed on.

So we both agreed to go for registry then normal engagement and rest the case.. she later changed her mind, she doesn't want the court registry anymore (i am not move with this anyway, but why? Is she having another secret affairs elsewhere, or maybe she's thinking she may leave if things go south, like she doesn't want to get into a legal marriage that will hinder her from having choice in the nearest future, because I don't understand..).. She only want Engagement, without the court registry for now.
Anytime her parents, especially her mom ask her about it in the wedding plan, she will tell her we will do it later in the future .
As a man in the first place I don't need to worry about this in the first place, because all this court marriage registration only favor the woman and I know most of them crave for it...

But she... What is she up to??

Blitzking:
■ any woman that is running away from court marriage doesn't value you as a man she is just managing you for whatever reason until a better option comes by...for high value man women jump at the opportunity..any gal wey no want court wedding should be ready to have other women join her too cos e no hard to do traditional wedding..a man can do 10 traditional wedding but can only do 1 court wedding.na why those registry go ask for passport.. nin...and all those other documents dem dey ask I don forget sef.

Ololade4:
Good day House.. I am an ardent Nairalander but I am using another identity to cover up..

It's almost over a year now that i started the journey with her, I met her parents 4 months ago, I was told by her day that thier daughter is not free( bride price things) normally... we talked it out and we decided to get marriage.. I am 35, she's 32. She has a 8 years old boy out of wedlock, the boy stays with her parent.. I don't have any problem with that, Single mother is not a disease.. we have being living together since March this year, just like a couple and i decided to tie the knot with her later in the year which we both agreed on.

So we both agreed to go for registry then normal engagement and rest the case.. she later changed her mind, she doesn't want the court registry anymore (i am not move with this anyway, but why? Is she having another secret affairs elsewhere, or maybe she's thinking she may leave if things go south, like she doesn't want to get into a legal marriage that will hinder her from having choice in the nearest future, because I don't understand..).. She only want Engagement, without the court registry for now.
Anytime her parents, especially her mom ask her about it in the wedding plan, she will tell her we will do it later in the future .
As a man in the first place I don't need to worry about this in the first place, because all this court marriage registration only favor the woman and I know most of them crave for it...

But she... What is she up to??

Ahmed0336:
No vex o, between the both of you, who get money/ assets pass?

spiceadole:
This is actually very funny.
Whenever I hear that man wants to get marry,I laugh.
Same marriage that they claim does not benefit them?

That aside...Men always say women want court marriage while they do not..So that a woman doesn't have any legal backing to share in their wealth after a divorce.


Now,a woman is saying NO...I don't want court marriage...and a man is disturbed about it.

3 gbosaaa for that lady!
I owe her a crate of her favourite brand.
She sure knows how to play this game.

Kemadealadire:
Same thing in my Church but it was David, Nabal and Abigail. The whole story was how David saw a good woman and grabbed her fast😁

Ololade4:
You're judging the book by its cover.. She even want the marriage more than me, I always have my emotion on check when dealing with a woman.. do u know how many emotional trauma I don give am?? Trust me she's even the one doing the chasing...

Kobojunkie:
If he doesn't learn from this, he will keep running until he can run no more.

pongwa:
the family of the lady don't trust him that's why they use the tactics. I bet there is another guy somewhere

Kobojunkiee:
Yes you do. Don't make assumptions. Go ask anyone who has actually left the shores of that country with a family to tell you the truth. The day you register your marriage in the courts is the day the courts officially recognizes it as having begun.

Olaide1295:
I’m in Europe. I moved here with my family.
You don’t need a court marriage as proof. A Nikkah/Church wedding certificate works.

Ololade4:
Good day House.. I am an ardent Nairalander but I am using another identity to cover up..

It's almost over a year now that i started the journey with her, I met her parents 4 months ago, I was told by her day that thier daughter is not free( bride price things) normally... we talked it out and we decided to get marriage.. I am 35, she's 32. She has a 8 years old boy out of wedlock, the boy stays with her parent.. I don't have any problem with that, Single mother is not a disease.. we have being living together since March this year, just like a couple and i decided to tie the knot with her later in the year which we both agreed on.

So we both agreed to go for registry then normal engagement and rest the case.. she later changed her mind, she doesn't want the court registry anymore (i am not move with this anyway, but why? Is she having another secret affairs elsewhere, or maybe she's thinking she may leave if things go south, like she doesn't want to get into a legal marriage that will hinder her from having choice in the nearest future, because I don't understand..).. She only want Engagement, without the court registry for now.
Anytime her parents, especially her mom ask her about it in the wedding plan, she will tell her we will do it later in the future .
As a man in the first place I don't need to worry about this in the first place, because all this court marriage registration only favor the woman and I know most of them crave for it...

But she... What is she up to??

Luckysbab:
Did you read the part where he mentioned "she changed her mind". Knowing how there's the overwhelming tendency that she wants to "keep her options open" with a new man or a previous man in her life, this is enough a red flag?

modernWays:
You are hopelessly battling with a serious low self esteem. Imagine a woman you will house, feed, take care of all her other needs and sometimes that of her family dictating to you?

Are you not suppose to be happy she don't want court marriage sef?


I wonder o, somebody that supposed to be happy he is not entering bondage as court/ registry favour her far more yet she rejected it.

Ololade4:
Good day House.. I am an ardent Nairalander but I am using another identity to cover up..

It's almost over a year now that i started the journey with her, I met her parents 4 months ago, I was told by her day that thier daughter is not free( bride price things) normally... we talked it out and we decided to get marriage.. I am 35, she's 32. She has a 8 years old boy out of wedlock, the boy stays with her parent.. I don't have any problem with that, Single mother is not a disease.. we have being living together since March this year, just like a couple and i decided to tie the knot with her later in the year which we both agreed on.

So we both agreed to go for registry then normal engagement and rest the case.. she later changed her mind, she doesn't want the court registry anymore (i am not move with this anyway, but why? Is she having another secret affairs elsewhere, or maybe she's thinking she may leave if things go south, like she doesn't want to get into a legal marriage that will hinder her from having choice in the nearest future, because I don't understand..).. She only want Engagement, without the court registry for now.
Anytime her parents, especially her mom ask her about it in the wedding plan, she will tell her we will do it later in the future .
As a man in the first place I don't need to worry about this in the first place, because all this court marriage registration only favor the woman and I know most of them crave for it...

But she... What is she up to??

phemray:
■ I guess you are a man, if you can't take charge now then you can take charge after marriage. Just test her with your closed friend to informed her in secret you planning japa and u want to arrange for marriage cert with another girl.
She will show u tru colour if she likes/Love u.

pocohantas:
I love that girl.



I hope other ladies can read and learn. The reason some men claim they don't want marriage or they have more to lose is because women carry it for head. Always fighting tooth and nail for (registry) marriage. So they sit back and allow you do all the work while acting like they did you a favour marrying you. Have you ever considered the fact that you would be the one needing to escape from an evil man in record time? Breaking head over a man's property even at the expense of your life.

This OP claims it favours women more but he is restless because he met a woman who has mastered her emotions. He wishes she were chasing him upandan for a legal wedding and flying to catch ring. He is bothered because he doesn't hold all the ACES.

Isn't this the kinda arrangement they claim to want online? #TEAMBABYMAMA? Why is OP worried and why the responses from his fellow men above?

Men want this marriage as much as you do if not more. If they hated marriage so much, they wouldn't be open to polygamy or rushing to marry another wife after a divorce or death of the first wife. No man keeps two (polygamy), even four of what he doesn't benefit from. They benefit heavily from marriage. In fact, after tasting marriage, they find it hard to stay alone again. Unlike women who would rather enjoy companionship without commitment.

Stop fighting these men over registry. Tell him you don't want. Let him be the one to create thread and beg you to sign those lines. Stop begging them to see the usefulness in marriage. Stop answering stupid NL questions like "what can you offer a man?" He has the option of remaining single or marrying a fellow man or new yam.

You are the prize.
If he isn't giving you same energy, disembark.

Olaide1295:
I’m in Europe. I moved here with my family.
You don’t need a court marriage as proof. A Nikkah/Church wedding certificate works.

Kobojunkie:
Leave the family out of it. This is between OP and the woman he is dating.

pocohantas:
I love that girl.



I hope other ladies can read and learn. The reason some men claim they don't want marriage or they have more to lose is because women carry it for head. Always fighting tooth and nail for (registry) marriage. So they sit back and allow you do all the work while acting like they did you a favour marrying you. Have you ever considered the fact that you would be the one needing to escape from an evil man in record time? Breaking head over a man's property even at the expense of your life.

This OP claims it favours women more but he is restless because he met a woman who has mastered her emotions. He wishes she were chasing him upandan for a legal wedding and flying to catch ring. He is bothered because he doesn't hold all the ACES.

Isn't this the kinda arrangement they claim to want online? #TEAMBABYMAMA? Why is OP worried and why the responses from his fellow men above?

Men want this marriage as much as you do if not more. If they hated marriage so much, they wouldn't be open to polygamy or rushing to marry another wife after a divorce or death of the first wife. No man keeps two (polygamy), even four of what he doesn't benefit from. They benefit heavily from marriage. In fact, after tasting marriage, they find it hard to stay alone again. Unlike women who would rather enjoy companionship without commitment.

Stop fighting these men over registry. Tell him you don't want. Let him be the one to create thread and beg you to sign those lines. Stop begging them to see the usefulness in marriage. Stop answering stupid NL questions like "what can you offer a man?" He has the option of remaining single or marrying a fellow man or new yam.

You are the prize.
If he isn't giving you same energy, disembark.

pongwa:
■ you think the family are not in support?
Although, you are right in a way. If Na me I go just end am straight

1Sharon:
Maybe you didn't read where he said he gave her emotional trauma? That could be the reason she's keeping her options open.

Ololade4:
Good day House.. I am an ardent Nairalander but I am using another identity to cover up..

It's almost over a year now that i started the journey with her, I met her parents 4 months ago, I was told by her day that thier daughter is not free( bride price things) normally... we talked it out and we decided to get marriage.. I am 35, she's 32. She has a 8 years old boy out of wedlock, the boy stays with her parent.. I don't have any problem with that, Single mother is not a disease.. we have being living together since March this year, just like a couple and i decided to tie the knot with her later in the year which we both agreed on.

So we both agreed to go for registry then normal engagement and rest the case.. she later changed her mind, she doesn't want the court registry anymore (i am not move with this anyway, but why? Is she having another secret affairs elsewhere, or maybe she's thinking she may leave if things go south, like she doesn't want to get into a legal marriage that will hinder her from having choice in the nearest future, because I don't understand..).. She only want Engagement, without the court registry for now.
Anytime her parents, especially her mom ask her about it in the wedding plan, she will tell her we will do it later in the future .
As a man in the first place I don't need to worry about this in the first place, because all this court marriage registration only favor the woman and I know most of them crave for it...

But she... What is she up to??

DMerciful:
This is not the point. When something behaves abnormally, its better to seek understanding why that is, and this is what the Op is doing.

Again, men have low urgency for marriage because they can technically marry anytime and still marry as young as 18yrs. Women generally do not have such privilege

A good man will always be the price!

pocohantas:
They have low urgency online, in reality, they are looking for wives and blaming their singlehood on lack of good girls.

She is not abnormal, she no want una registry. No be force.

DMerciful:
I did not say she's abnormal, i said abnormal situation.

Ofcourse, if you marry a good girl, you have peace of mind. No wonder the Bible said he who FINDS a wife....you only have to find something good as they're not common....bad things are common!

pocohantas:
Then post this and leave talk.