₦airaland Forum

What is the culturally appropriate and emotionally healthy waiting period for widows or divorcees before they can openly seek and embrace new love and relationships?

AntiChristian:
"What is the culturally appropriate and emotionally healthy waiting period for widows or divorcees before they can openly seek and embrace new love and relationships?"

It could be a year, it could be a decade. It doesn't really matter.

1 month,is too far for that.

AntiChristian:
So the widow/widower/divorcee should do away with companionship, his bread winner (if the dead was her bread winner), and other marital duties for a year or decade that doesn't really matter?

Arguing with you will just stress me. The aforementioned can marry anytime they like and i gave example that it could be a year later or 10 years later. People have been doing it. A widow marries after a year some 2 years later, some 15 years later. So like how long doesn't matter but the person's choice.

Once the dead is laid to rest, and traditional mourning period is over (this varies across cultures and societies).

After this, it's now up to the widowed person, depending on their level of bonding and intimacy with the deceased... Some might choose to pursue celibacy.

As for Divorce and annulment, that comes down to personal choices. As long as the papers are signed, there are no moral or legal restrictions whatsoever.

As soon as she start to have sexual urge.

Can we know the reason for this question since the time frame depend on various conditions in igbo culture.

My elder brother is in this shoes now.

He has refused to re-marry after 10 years.

Divorce indeed is a terrible thing for an upright person who doesn't have a cheating streak.

It depends on their waiting preferences and how they love the person that passed away...

There's no waiting period in some people's dictionary, max for them is 3month and life goes on again

AS E BE SO E DEPENDS IF DEM DEY TAKE FORK PLAY OR NOT CAUSE WOMAN WEY NO DEY TAKE FORK PLAY NA ONCE HER HUSBAND ENTER MORTUARY NA TO START FORK AGAIN SO OOOOO CAUSE HER KÙKÚNÁSÉ NO DEY GROW YOUNG SO OOOO

Depends. Most of the time it's not worth it. Especially when kids are involved.
Lost mom 1998. My old man no remarry till date. Doesn't mean other women didn't come and go. Baba put us first.

My friend lost his mum last year august. March this year, his dad don introduce them to new wife. Liiiikkeee!!!

So it depends.

Which love are you seeking for.
Just say partner for opue...
For this hard life na him person dey marry twice, when OS full everywhere.

AntiChristian:
What is the culturally appropriate and emotionally healthy waiting period for widows or divorcees before they can openly seek and embrace new love and relationships?

Cultures are different from place to place. Some men will secretly impregnate another woman while their wife is still with them, while some women will even get pregnant for another man while their husband is still with them.

How it happens in Enugu is different from how it happens in Zamfara or Lagos. Just apply your senses when it comes to marriage matter.

So, theres no direct answer to this question.

How long depends on so many factors. If you're divorced or widowed and have children, their interests should also be considered when seeking a new relationship. A neighbour of mine remarried two years after his wife passed away, and unfortunately, the children from the first marriage have not been treated well by the new wife. Sadly, the father seems unwilling to address the situation.

The timing of moving on varies from person to person. If you deeply respected your late spouse and shared many good memories together, it may be wise to give yourself adequate time to grieve before entering another relationship.

Another important factor is how the previous relationship or marriage ended. If it ended on a bitter note, healing should come first. Without proper healing, there is a risk of using someone as a rebound or being emotionally vulnerable and getting hurt. That can be especially damaging for someone with a fragile heart.

For widows and widowers: As soon as best, even if it has to be immediately after mourning.

It depends on the individual.

A friend of mine Dad refused to marry but he dey carry woman dey knack for Hotels. When his children asked him about it, he told them that the love he have for their late mum won't make him marry another woman but he has to take care of konji

As for the widow or widower,it all depends on their relationship while their partner was alive and the children the deceased left behind.l used to have a church colleague,a senior custom officer,till date he confessed to me personally that all his wife wares such as clothes, shoes,etc remain where they were since her demise and he is not ready to marry another woman.He has a grown up children that are doing fine, they had a house help who is helping their father to cook twice in a week.When l had same experience in 2017,l vowed not to remarry too, but, later changed my mind after five years because of some reasons such as loliness,worries, trauma of missing patner and many more.

Seek for love or seek for money and support?
We all know what they want.

Why follow rules when each individual experience differs

Allow love to find you again

AntiChristian:
What is the culturally appropriate and emotionally healthy waiting period for widows or divorcees before they can openly seek and embrace new love and relationships?

This question will be answered by the biology or libido of the bereaved partner.

A divorcee can even marry the next day if possible.

As for a widow it depends on the relationship/bond she had with her late partner. Common sense should tell her to respect the man and wait for a while before rushing to service her engine.

If you look at it in a Christian way
God hates divorce and has made it clear that if you must divorce, you can't marry again.

If you look at it in a worldly way
75% of divorcees end up divorcing again.

Conclusion... Marriage is not for everyone

Is this a trick question?

Social media can not tell you my dear.
Your conscience should be the one to tell you.

Seun, how can you allow a username like this on nairaland?


Like this is stu.pid.

Depending how soon konji hold the person....

Few weeks is enough for Divorcee but for the widow maybe few months

As soon as they found someone else

Account Operating as a fxcking AntiChristian?

Seun why should this account see the next seconds after it creation?

This is an open hate.

It's provocative.

Violate Rule 2
2. Don't abuse, bully, deliberately insult/provoke, fight, or wish harm to Nairaland members OR THEIR TRIBES

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Nlfpmod
Mynd44

I think it all depends on the custom or tradition where she comes from

Kalatium:
It could be a year, it could be a decade. It doesn't really matter.

A decade?!

Make conji kee am?