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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses (125382 Views)
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Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:09pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
1 Like |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by raumdeuter: 8:09pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
carefreewannabe: ANy sane man would provide money to take care of his child, WOmen asking to be rewarded for having their own babies is the appearance of insanity here |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by ladygogo: 8:10pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
bukatyne: Lol. Stories that touch. Those ones wont be submissive to them now and their eye don open. Na wetin dia eye dey find e dey see. |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:10pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
2 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by raumdeuter: 8:11pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
Fhemmmy: Child support I fully support. spousal support I disagree, then who would pay or refund the man for money he has spent on the family while the woman had no contribution |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:11pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
Side bar Eating lunch Make una come o Yoghurt'akara,banana,apple and cookies 1 Like
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Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:12pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
raumdeuter: Laziness? I will rather work extra hours for my boss than take care of a baby 24 / 7. I am serious. I love kids but I also love my job and even though I don't have kids yet, I think that looking after a baby is harder than what I do for a living. Some people hire maids, babysitters, nannies, whatever, and it works and in some cases, these kids are abused. I won't jeopardize my kids' life. No strangers until s/he can speak. The fatherly duties include provision and the men take care of this and after divorce never ask to be refunded the money they spent feeding the family or paying the rent. Its the greedy party who seeks these. The money he spends during marriage can be considered in the calculations. And I can comfortably tell you that if it was me in the scenario, who will share the bills with the money I get on maternity leave, and we would consider what I lost when staying at home and after divorce for not having taken the chance to be promoted because I stayed at home, a middle class man will not be able to compensate me for the sacrifice. Most Nigerian women dont pay for things in their own household. How many times have we seen women who would write an expense sheet and submit to the husband to be refunded. WHere does the saying "My money is my money, your money is our money" come from? Most is not all. Like I said, it can all be calculated and in some cases, the men will be happy that it is 50 / 50 and shut up. How many Nigerian women spend on their family. A woman spends a kobo the whole world would hear True but we are talking about the "unjust" Western laws here, aren't we? And in the West MOST women don't reason like our Naija sisters. It must be considered when discussing these "unjust" laws. You must also consider that in the West kids stay with the mother after divorce. Most men are perfectly ok with it. Why? Because it is comfortable. They can work full time, they don't have to work part time because they don'T pick the kids from school during the week, don't take them to sports club and wait there for them, don't cook for them every day, don't take them to doctors ....... They have their kids every second weekend. Convenient, isn't it? Nobody should stop their career, let everyone works, So we wont stop all o them from being Alakija in their workplace. It's not always possible and not necessarily advisable but it would go a long way if fathers understood that it takes more to be a parent than just provide food and shelter. |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:13pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
Nonso23: The scriptures says anyone that lacks wisdom should ask and the Lord who gives freely will answer Try that Then read that post again I promise it will become clearer 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Fhemmmy: 8:13pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
babyosisi: Lol , , , 1 Like |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by raumdeuter: 8:13pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
Black American men, African men, Arabian men, Hispanic men white men have never been to Nigeria before and they dont have Nigerian mentality How come majority of Nigerian women in DIaspora still dont marry them Soon you would see a thread by a diaspora Nigerian female then Nigerian men are leaving them to marry non Nigerians |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:14pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
raumdeuter: I am not asking to be rewarded. I am asking for fairness. |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by mutter(f): 8:15pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
bukatyne: I understand you very well A very close friend of mine came to me once and said she had totally to me. She said she always treasured my advice but I could give her two opposite advice on the same issue on two different days. I told her that between black and white are many shades and you have to look at it from different perspectives. So I try to look at different anglesö I do not got to my extreme to support men. It just so happens that most posts here are from women about men and if someone mentions pro, I try to address contra. Look at all sides. I teach my son men and women are equal to make them treat women as worthy but I teach my daughters the role of a woman. I realize that many women are saints compared to me but when reading a post it is not so much the issue but the tone the woman uses and the way she expresses her self and also things she mentions by the way that allow one to have an impression of the situation. I would deal harshly with anyone that goes on my daughter because I will believe her and be ready to go the battle and because I will make it clear to her that she is victim. It also depends on what facilities one has at their disposal. I lived in Nigeria and I know how it goes there. There is no professional help for the victim. 2 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by coogar: 8:15pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
bukatyne: having bästards isn't the real crime. bringing them home and lying to their husbands he's responsible is the crux. that's about the only thing that could make a man lose his mind and go on a shooting spree.... |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Ewuro4: 8:16pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
soulglo: Start from your own post history. Its your area of expertise 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:16pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
Nonso23: I have a simple solution for you people. Stay at home and look after the children and let your wives work. This way you can make sure that you will get money after divorce. You will be so rich. |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:16pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
3 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by raumdeuter: 8:16pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
carefreewannabe:carefreewannabe, You last post was very sensible. 1 Like |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Dragonking: 8:16pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
Fhemmmy: My brother stop saying what you don't know ..men abuse women and women abuse men...the only difference is that a man feels ashamed to report such issue becos people might make jest of him instead of treating the issue as a serious offence...read this and stop trying hard to win sympathy from the ladies here.. https://www.nairaland.com/2132096/woman-allegedly-kills-husband-stabbing 1 Like |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:17pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
raumdeuter: People tend to stick to their kind that's why The same reason majority of married Igbo women are married to Igbo men and majority of married Yoruba women are married to Yoruba men Is that hard to understand why nigerian women in the diaspora would prefer nigerian men 1 Like |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Ewuro4: 8:17pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
FriedPlantain: I dey jare.. How body |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:17pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
raumdeuter: Sensible is my second name. Joking. |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Fhemmmy: 8:17pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
raumdeuter: Please come again, did you just said she had no contribution? Cooking for him - He could as well hire a chef (Imagine in western world - 1000$ per month) Taking care of the kids - He could as well hire a Nanny ( Another 1000$ per month) And while the man was gone, she take care of the home, and mind you, lots of these ladies are ready to work, BUT hubby told her to quit and be a "Stay home" Mom , , , , Now when wahala happen, it means she has to go back to work and do you know how long before she will get something cos she has been out of work for probably a while? Go figure. Contribution is NOT always about MONEY . . . Houston's daughter has money right now, but an emotional wreck . . . AGAIN no one could reward a woman for all she has contributed. 1 Like |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by raumdeuter: 8:18pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
babyosisi: I am certain there are more Nigerian men married to non Nigerian women than vice versa. WHy do you think this is so? |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:18pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
bukatyne: Buka, all you've said is the very definition of hypocrisy. She didn't stay with her ex and continue to humble herself more and be more submissive but that's the default advice for everyone who is going through the same situation she went through. Just unbelievable. 2 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:19pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
raumdeuter: Raumdeuter, I have to quote you here. I live in the West and the truth is that many Nigerian men complain about Nigerian women and about foreign women. I don'T know what went wrong but there are many who have serious problems with women, no matter where these women come from. |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Fhemmmy: 8:20pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
Dragonking: Go and check well that thread and you will see my comment there . . . I still blame that man for what happen in that case, cos he had been stabbed before and yet remain there . . . MInd you, i am not saying women dont have their share of the issues, as a matter of fact, anyone called human is not perfect and we are all work in progress . . . . And a man that is abused and ashamed of reporting it is NOT a man, no need to even report it, if you know you cant handle it - WALK AWAY . . . Marriage is a NOT a do or DIE. |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:20pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
carefreewannabe: Datsall!!! And fair is half or close to it |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by bukatyne(f): 8:20pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
2sExy1: Your uncle should Check himself If he keeps attracting same women |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by coogar: 8:20pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
babyosisi: but according to this thread, nigerian men are.... criminals beasts unruly monsters wife murderers abusers drug addicts fraudsters priggish obnoxious leave them alone, try the caucasian males or the highly polygynous carribbean men. that's what the ever-innocent nigerian women deserve. 2 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by raumdeuter: 8:20pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
Fhemmmy: Buying the food, WHo compensates him for this? Giving money for the babies needs who refunds him for this Rent paid who pays him for these. And the other duties the man performs in the house, mow the lawn, who pays him for this(Landscapers cost a fortune)? Changing car oil or fixing both cars when having minor faults (mechanic would have cost a fortune) Fixing minor electrical and mechanical work at home - Being the handyman - (Have you checked how much they charge on Angieslist) |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:21pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
coogar: Haven't you said worse about women? 5 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 8:22pm On Feb 05, 2015 |
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