toluine56:

To your question, Yes I have, and i'm also wondering if someone else who typed this trash, you'll probably give a ban straightaway. When did earning a honest living translate into not helping people or what exactly is your point? My problem with most people commenting on this thread is that they didn't read up and fail to understand where this discussion is coming from, besides it's not compulsory to comment on every thread. Drop your arrogance for once Mr. Chief Honourable Justwise. Thank you.

So pointing out your misguided opinion about leaving abroad and condition of things has now translated to arrogance?

It just goes to show the type of person you are hence your view on this issue.

People leaving abroad without a job for a year or two does not means they are lazy or using it as an excuse not to help anybody back home.

Again if you work and making an honest living then you should understand that not everybody has disposable income at a certain time to carry out a big money project back home.

Its very naive to assume that because one is living abroad for some yrs that individual will be in a position to help relatives back home without knowing that person's situation.

justwise:
[/b]

So pointing out your misguiding opinion about leaving abroad and condition of things has now translated to arrogance?

It just goes to show the type of person you are hence your view on this issue.

People leaving abroad without a job for a year or two does not means they are lazy or using it as an excuse not to help anybody back home hence my initial question to you.

Again if you work and making an honest living then you should understand that not everybody has disposable income at a certain time to carry out a big money project back home.

Pretty much the point i was trying to make... When you tell people that, they immediately play dumb and re-emphasize that point of

helping no matter what. Your last 10 kobo, just send it in the name of helping while you go hungry for the rest of the month, smh

moonraker:



Pretty much the point i was trying to make... When you tell people that, they immediately play dumb and re-emphasize that point of

helping no matter what. Your last 10 kobo, just send it in the name of helping while you go hungry for the rest of the month, smh

I stood my ground on that with my family members and they can be as angry as they want but i will not send money home for white elephant projects or over floated business ideas.

Sometimes ago one needed a small amount to set up a business and i complied but my recent trip to Nigeria exposes the fact that he never used that money to start up that business and i did not bother to ask him.


People are busy checking exchange rate for you as if you earn in £ or $ and spend in naira.

justwise:


Again if you work and making an honest living then you should understand that not everybody has disposable income at a certain time to carry out a big money project back home.

This is still what I'm hammering on;
You have no idea what I'm talking about.
You picked a phrase from a lengthy post I made and started critiquing without reading fully. Point out where I talked about a big money project?
I even quoted an amount $35 once in a whole year. Did you even read the OP's situation?

toluine56:

I am personally an advocate of all you typed above. Now point out where I contravened any of the points you raised. I'm sure you can read and comprehend properly. Thanks

Yeah right. If you truly believe this post up there is consistent with the sentiments expressed in your previous comments, then all I can say is good luck to you.

justwise:
[/b]

So pointing out your misguiding opinion about leaving abroad and condition of things has now translated to arrogance?

Yes it does.
Subtly throwing shades at people is arrogance.
You can still make a point without sounding arrogant. You were insinuating that I haven't earned a living honestly/dishonestly. That statement speaks volumes Mr. in case you don't know.

toluine56:

If you've been in the US, Canada for a year plus and you're unemployed, its either you're lazy, or just using it as a faucet to be selfish. My friend that just got to Ca less than a year ago does cleaning jobs and he still sends little stipends to his younger sis in Naija every two months though little.

When you make a comment like this ^^ then i have to question what you do for a living.

toluine56:


Yes it does.
Subtly throwing shades at people is arrogance.
You can still make a point without sounding arrogant. You were insinuating that I haven't earned a living honestly/dishonestly. That statement speaks volumes Mr. in case you don't know.

justwise:


When you make a comment like this ^^ then i have to question what you do for a living.

No you don't have to and I'm beginning to think you are in that category of people (Lazyasses).

toluine56:

No you don't have to and I'm beginning to think you are in that category of people (Lazyasses).

If you work half as hard as i have worked and still working then your view on this issue will be reasonable.

justwise:


If you work half as hard as i have worked and still working then your view on this issue will be reasonable.

You think your view is reasonable?
Living in the US for a year or two without a job.
After your UK sojourn probably it took you 10years to get a menial job and that's what you refer to as working hard?

Sacarsm I guess

Be smarter next time and by smart I don't mean doing anything illegal cos that'll be your next call.

toluine56:

You think your view is reasonable?
Living in the US for a year or two without a job.
After your UK sojourn probably it took you 10years to get a menial job and that's what you refer to as working hard?

Sacarsm I guess

Be smarter next time and by smart I don't mean doing anything illegal cos that'll be your next call.

Clearly you knew nothing about me, never visited US let alone lived there, my assessment of your character was spot on.

No sensible individual make such a rash assumption with no single credible evidence.

justwise:


Clearly you knew nothing about me, never visited US let alone lived there, my assessment of your character was spot on.

No sensible individual make such a rash assumption with no single credible evidence.

You need to learn how to read, okay?
I was referring to my earlier post which you quoted.

moonraker:


no need. Your remixing the whole thing and jumping into conclusions based on nothing...

Bottom line is, It is only someone who is fed that can help. not someone who is hungry.

The perspective i was referring to ( That you wrongly interpreted) was to analyze all sides of the story.


Everyone on here taking on here, thinking they have an opinion. We are only hearing one side of the story.

The debate here should be Why is the uncle not helping the Op if he is doing OK as the OP placed it??

Dont quote me if your not going to answer constructively.

Now you're changing your stance. If the highlighted part of your post was what you said all these while, nobody will quote you in a critical way. But your previous comments had you insinuating that those in abroad should not be asked for help because they have a lot on their table and suffer to make their monies. That was what you were insinuating initially,hence my criticism. And I don't know what you mean that I'm remixing your statement because as far as I know, what I said was a rehash of your penultimate Comment. You can't expect me to know what's in your mind, I can only judge you based on what you say.

Justwise where do you reside

NONNYG:
Justwise where do you reside

The UK

helpyom:











But your wrong judging from others I knw i often call him way back then in sch not that i was asking from him at a time he put his phone on voice that's how we stopped communicating on phone.

It was chat then during my project in school there was no means with my dad having alot of things around him had to ask this my uncle for little contribution of project money till today it was only God that provided can't remember how the money came about at the dieing minute he didn't reply me still.

What am I saying i often communicate with him very well even when he hurts me, like is just something that is unbearable I had to ask why seeing this dreams fade away makes me unhapi each day.

If I'm getting you correctly you called to ask for money previously and your uncle did not give the money but God provided?

God will provide again won't he?

Your uncle thinks you are just calling to ask for money. Is he not 100% CORRECT though?

Trust me, I have lived in Australia before for 2 and a half years. I also studied for a year and a half there but even though I have a sister that lived there before going (and still does)I never expected her to assist me or pay my fees, rent, food or clothing.

I did that myself and also saved for almost 3 years before going just so that I would not be a burden to my sister or any relative back in the UK. Life in Australia is EXPENSIVE even more than London.

I returned to the UK in 2015 and carried on with my life after an amazing couple of years.


Instead of researching courses take a look at what the Australian government expects students to have especially from Africa.

Do you know that ON TOP of your course fees, you must show them a return ticket to Australia and proof of AT LEAST 18,610 Australian Dollars?

Is this what you are expecting your uncle to provide? Because your dad at one time helped him 'somehow'? The help which you 'somehow' avoid specifically mentioning which to me means it is probably in no way comparable to what you now want to ask of him.

Try to apply for education funds specifically for students coming from the developing world. There are also countries such as Turkey that have VERY low fees.


Please remember, when you are calculating your amount to live on please don't include what belongs to others.

bayocanny:

That's naija people for you. God will help us.
How's london?

London is okay thanks. Yeah some Naija people and other Africans are like that.
There are people in Nigeria that I would assist in some ways because my relationship with them is different and it is mutually beneficial and I can see their mindset and work ethic is just different.

londoner:


London is okay thanks. Yeah some Naija people and other Africans are like that.
There are people in Nigeria that I would assist in some ways because my relationship with them is different and it is mutually beneficial and I can see their mindset and work ethic is just different.

Hmm, you are so on point ma

londoner:


London is okay thanks. Yeah some Naija people and other Africans are like that.
There are people in Nigeria that I would assist in some ways because my relationship with them is different and it is mutually beneficial and I can see their mindset and work ethic is just different.

Unlike some others that have zeroed their minds about helping no matter what. Godbless you Londoner.

bayocanny:

Hmm, you are so on point ma

Thank you.

toluine56:

Unlike some others that have zeroed their minds about helping no matter what. Godbless you Londoner.

For real. There are two guys in my local grocery stores that went to Lagos the same time I went to Abuja. They were criticizing me on my stance before but I spoke to them this week and both lamented their trip, for all the reasons discussed here.

One even said his relative that took him to the airport asked for his shoes. The ones he was actually wearing lol.

londoner:


Thank you.

U welcome ma, during my secondary school days I so much love to travel to England to further my studies, infact the country was my favourite among other countries of the world but the love I have for her(England) started dwindling at some point don't know the reason why...tell me something interesting about london or make I kuku pm you

londoner:


If I'm getting you correctly you called to ask for money previously and your uncle did not give the money but God provided?

God will provide again won't he?

Your uncle thinks you are just calling to ask for money. Is he not 100% CORRECT though?

Trust me, I have lived in Australia before for 2 and a half years. I also studied for a year and a half there but even though I have a sister that lived there before going (and still does)I never expected her to assist me or pay my fees, rent, food or clothing.

I did that myself and also saved for almost 3 years before going just so that I would not be a burden to my sister or any relative back in the UK. Life in Australia is EXPENSIVE even more than London.

I returned to the UK in 2015 and carried on with my life after an amazing couple of years.


Instead of researching courses take a look at what the Australian government expects students to have especially from Africa.

Do you know that ON TOP of your course fees, you must show them a return ticket to Australia and proof of AT LEAST 18,610 Australian Dollars?

Is this what you are expecting your uncle to provide? Because your dad at one time helped him 'somehow'? The help which you 'somehow' avoid specifically mentioning which to me means it is probably in no way comparable to what you now want to ask of him.

Try to apply for education funds specifically for students coming from the developing world. There are also countries such as Turkey that have VERY low fees.


Please remember, when you are calculating your amount to live on please don't include what belongs to others.

Thank you very much Madam.

The bolded point is what i was trying to pass along on here and i was called out to be wicked... I can bet that even the people calling me wicked,

if they were in that situation, they would do worse. Alot of hypocrites on this thread.

I left Nigeria at a very young age. i remember back in the day, i had an uncle who was based in Germany. I use to ask him for stuff but he would

promise and fail. But this same Uncle would come into the country and in quote "Flexing". Luxury cars cash etc.

Now i understand.

The Nigerian mentality- Dont ask me what this is. i am sure you all know what this means.

bayocanny:

U welcome ma, during my secondary school days I so much love to travel to England to further my studies, infact the country was my favourite among other countries of the world but the love I have for her(England) started dwindling at some point don't know the reason why...tell me something interesting about london or make I kuku pm you

In fact every interesting thing you'll want to know about London is on the internet. Happy searching my friend.

londoner:

One even said his relative that took him to the airport asked for his shoes. The ones he was actually wearing lol.

Lol. That's crazy. Guess it was meant to be a joke.

londoner:

Do you know that ON TOP of your course fees, you must show them a return ticket to Australia and proof of AT LEAST 18,610 Australian Dollars?

Is anything wrong for her uncle to provide the money if he can afford it?

londoner:

Is this what you are expecting your uncle to provide? Because your dad at one time helped him 'somehow'? The help which you 'somehow' avoid specifically mentioning which to me means it is probably in no way comparable to what you now want to ask of him.

Seriously I'm somehow amazed at your reasoning. So the help she is to receive from her uncle must be commensurate with the help the uncle received from her father before she is due for one? Hmm, there are people in this world o!

londoner:

Your uncle thinks you are just calling to ask for money. Is he not 100% CORRECT though?

What is wrong for her to ask the uncle for money?

[/b]

tobiasbeecher:

Is anything wrong for her uncle to provide the money if he can afford it?



Seriously I'm somehow amazed at your reasoning. So the help she is to receive from her uncle must be commensurate with the help the uncle received from her father before she is due for one? Hmm, there are people in this world o!

What is wrong for her to ask the uncle for money?

>>Her Uncle is not her ATM.
>>he's not obligated to assist her, he owes her nothing.
>>Everyone has got their own responsibilities and cross to bear
>>How many people in op's very little capacity has he/she helped. You don't have to travel abroad or wait until you "hammer" before you could help others as well. As the op is, trust me, some people (younger ones) are also looking up to him/her even if it's a token of 500 naira. How many protégé has been raised through the op' s goodwill? How many of his/her relatives in school has he/she deemed it fit to get at least a textbook or sandal for? how many of them has the op adopted as his/her younger siblings, taking care of? Your guess is as good as mine. Why? Because it's easy to assess people from distance, profiling and judging them from their appearance(so called achievements) then conclude they could manage to do this and do that when in reality, you don't know what the person is passing through, regardless of his or her appearing/reflective status,which most times is not entirely as they are truly. Everyone at every point and stages in life would always have some people envying you no matter how good or bad you might personally think your situation is.

I used to be like the OP before. Used to wonder why my cousins could not help to facilitate my traveling out, meanwhile they could do for their brothers and sisters inlaw's. Later I thought about everything and realized, NO ONE OWES NO ONE ANYTHING.
if help comes you grasp it and appreciate, if it doesn't, don't sulk. Move on. Make yourself to become who you want to be without relying on anyone but GOD.


Remember, whatever human beings do for you, they'd later make reference to it (Just as you, op did). Only God can give you more than what you desire and deserve in life and if there's anyone to make reference to it later, in the future, it'd be you yourself.

GetUmad:

[/b]

[b]
>>Her Uncle is not her ATM.
>>he's not obligated to assist her, he owes her nothing.
>>Everyone has got their own responsibilities and cross to bear
>>How many people in her own very little capacity has he/she helped. You don't have to travel abroad or wait until you "hammer" before you could help others as well. As the op is, trust me, some people (younger ones) are also looking up to him/her even if it's a token of 500 naira. How many has he/she helped? How many of his/her relatives in or school has he/she deemed it fit to get at least a textbook or sandal, how many of them has the option adopted as his/her younger siblings taking care of? Your guess is as good as mine. Why? Because it's easy to assess people from distance, profiling and judging them from their appearance(so called achievements) then conclude they could manage to do this and do that when in reality, you don't know what the person is passing through, regardless of his or her appearing/reflective status,which most times is not entirely as they are truly.

I used to be like the OP before. Used to wonder why my cousins could not help to facilitate my traveling out, meanwhile they could do for their brothers and sisters inlaw's. Later I thought about everything and realized, NO ONE OWES NO ONE ANYTHING.
if help comes you grasp it and appreciate, if it doesn't, don't wonder why. Move on. Make yourself to become who you want to be without relying on anyone but God. [/b]

Tell me how does all these relate to my questions?

tobiasbeecher:

Is anything wrong for her uncle to provide the money if he can afford it?



Seriously I'm somehow amazed at your reasoning. So the help she is to receive from her uncle must be commensurate with the help the uncle received from her father before she is due for one? Hmm, there are people in this world o!

What is wrong for her to ask the uncle for money?

Answer 1

No, there is nothing wrong. But can he afford it? this is the question. Secondly it seems you have a weird definition of affordability.

Like the Uncle is suppose to send his left over money to his niece?? This is where i have a problem with.


Answer 2

Again, No. there is nothing wrong with the OP asking her uncle for money. However, when you use your father`s support as a criteria

to your demands, then that is shameful.


You asked the previous poster what all he typed had to do with your questions??

Well heres the relation.

The Op`s uncle doesnt owe his niece anything.

If the uncle can afford it, sure. If he cant, he cannot kill himself. Its really that simple. I am sure your not retarded to understand that.

moonraker:



Answer 1

No, there is nothing wrong. But can he afford it? this is the question. Secondly it seems you have a weird definition of affordability.

Like the Uncle is suppose to send his left over money to his niece?? This is where i have a problem with.


Answer 2

Again, No. there is nothing wrong with the OP asking her uncle for money. However, when you use your father`s support as a criteria

to your demands, then that is shameful.


You asked the previous poster what all he typed had to do with your questions??

Well heres the relation.

The Op`s uncle doesnt owe his niece anything.

If the uncle can afford it, sure. If he cant, he cannot kill himself. Its really that simple. I am sure your not retarded to understand that .

That exactly is my fear Bro, hence my refusal to reply him.

It is not only family members that can help financially. People have also received help here from people they do not know

All of you blaming the uncle "for not helping" or indirectly calling him "unhelpful" should help the OP out and contribute to her travelling out