iyaayi:
My live in brother in law of whom we are agemates barged into my room unannounced this morning. I was totally naked & had to dive under the bed from the shame & shock.

He stood there apologising that he didn't know i was in the room (we had met outside by the clothes line a short while ago).
The most painful part is that my husband who was lying in d bed in the room didn't find it necessary to utter a word.
When I confronted him, he said that shebi his brother had said 'sorry'
I really don't know what to do. I feel let down by hubby's reaction & also ashamed about the whole incident.
pls good folks, what do I do to redress the situation. thank you

This is why I love separate bedrooms for couples
I have my own room,once am inside it,the door stays locked
I can only be unclad in my husband's room at bedtime

HaneefahRN:



There is absolutely no big deal about nudity.
You can always display your wife butt-naked on TV for the World to see to show you are mature.

I know lots of guys here have been programmed to always fault women even when it's obvious a man is at fault.

The BIL is very wrong, you just don't barge into people's room anyhow. A married couple for that matter. Courtesy demands you knock.
I guess not everyone has that home-training though.

Let's assume it was a mistake and excitement made him forget to knock, he knew she was unclad, could see her trying to dodge. and hide and he still stood there supposedly apologizing.
A right thinking husband would reprimand him, it doesn't have to involve sending packing or the rubbish some people keep spewing up there.
He should have said something, warned him never to barge into their room that way ever again.

Next time he will still barge in, probably when she is home alone and unclad or they could be busy in the act, there should be a limit to everything.
I can't even enter my parent's room without knocking and seeking permission.


It's plain disrespect, but boys who don't respect women on a normal day would still defend it

You know what?
It's d guy's approach that made me commented that way though, I mean d guy I quoted.

Back to the main topic, to be honest, I agree with you. you r absolutely right. The saying that the guy stood still and was apologizing while the lady was trying to hide is sth that I won't agree with. I doubt that was truly want the case. How could he have stood still while the husband was also there in the room?
I doubt any sane person in his right state of mind 'lld do that.

Dear Haneefah, what we need to know is that some issues do not require over flogging. Let me be plain with u here, I'm sure the guy who barged in wouldn't be comfortable in the house too, at atleast for a couple of time. He wud hate himself for those period more than you hate him or his mistake. I'm sure he would have reprimanded himself a thousand times in his head.....The husband's reprimanding him wouldn't do much, Infact, if at all, it does, it 'll do the worse. The most effective approach is just to let go. I'm so sure if the guy is sane and in his right mindset, he 'll knock and knock repeatedly any other time has a reason to be in that room again, even when he is so sure that the wife had travelled a thousand miles away from the domain. Besides, he may never come into that room for the rest of his stay in that house.
However, the husband's decision to play it cool goes to show that he understood the brother's intention and he knows what's wud be going on in his brother's mind, he's so sure that the guy would have himself reprimanded all by himself. Remember, he is his little brother ns am sure he knows him better than anyone else.

Going to him or reprimanding him is like opening up a sore. To me, It's absolutely not necessary.

Though, everyone with his/her opinion......

Away from that dear Haneefah.......
are u a practising muslimah? with a good to moderate understanding of the Deen, if u are, pls reach me back.
I think I like ur approach to this issue even though we have slight differences in our approach to it.
You can contact me through text on 08092268498 or better still tell me how to reach u.
Thanks as I anticipate.

omoelerin1:
to my own observation, the so called juvenile comments are more sensible compared to yours. maturity is never all about age.

Common shut up. Did you see the silly comment calling her a bitch.
Swerve!

iyaayi:
My live in brother in law of whom we are agemates barged into my room unannounced this morning. I was totally naked & had to dive under the bed from the shame & shock.

He stood there apologising that he didn't know i was in the room (we had met outside by the clothes line a short while ago).
The most painful part is that my husband who was lying in d bed in the room didn't find it necessary to utter a word.
When I confronted him, he said that shebi his brother had said 'sorry'
I really don't know what to do. I feel let down by hubby's reaction & also ashamed about the whole incident.
pls good folks, what do I do to redress the situation. thank you

Adoblive this.
Any pics or video to corroborate your story?

Berbierklaus:

Exactly,especially a married woman's room,I don't dare enter my aunt's room without knocking even when her husband is not there,that's just total lack of respect....

Jeeez,I find it really annoying that some people are saying no big deal about it,worst still the husband's reaction, like really? My husband better not try that with me

OP you better be stern and firm with that your brother in-law, call him,and tell him squarely never to enter your room without knocking and waiting for a response before entering.

And watch your back,I don't trust that your husband and brother in-law.
Better still buy key and make sure you lock that door when you are inside,I do that to my room,so I'm used to it.

bad advice. she should not trust her husband any more because of this triviality? dont scatter someone's marriage, please.

iyaayi:
My live in brother in law of whom we are agemates barged into my room unannounced this morning. I was totally naked & had to dive under the bed from the shame & shock.

He stood there apologising that he didn't know i was in the room (we had met outside by the clothes line a short while ago).
The most painful part is that my husband who was lying in d bed in the room didn't find it necessary to utter a word.
When I confronted him, he said that shebi his brother had said 'sorry'
I really don't know what to do. I feel let down by hubby's reaction & also ashamed about the whole incident.
pls good folks, what do I do to redress the situation. thank you

are you not the student teacher i met in Sonmori Senior Comprehensive High School?

iyaayi:
My live in brother in law of whom we are agemates barged into my room unannounced this morning. I was totally naked & had to dive under the bed from the shame & shock.

He stood there apologising that he didn't know i was in the room (we had met outside by the clothes line a short while ago).
The most painful part is that my husband who was lying in d bed in the room didn't find it necessary to utter a word.
When I confronted him, he said that shebi his brother had said 'sorry'
I really don't know what to do. I feel let down by hubby's reaction & also ashamed about the whole incident.
pls good folks, what do I do to redress the situation. thank you

just say the truth, he saw you and your husband as you dey bang each other. thats why you re feeling shame

Chanchit:
You no gree wait make he see full view before you dive enter under bed, and he didn't know you were even there, so if to say ur husband na those mumu husband, na so you go say make he chase the guy komot.

brother you are suffering from ogbanje powers I recommend suicide

I can see why e pain you too much, your boobs don fall finish that why you dey shame,... but the guy is wrong,.. if your brother in law eyes no dey your body, then e wan see you and your husband making love,.. coming in without locking was intention to him.. e finally get it goal

I did this when I was staying with my Aunty in about 17 years ago.

I bumped into her total naked( Hugged her) since then she dey vex for me anyhow.


Lol...

richyblink1:


Kindly read well or get a recommended glass. I am male for your information, and married as well. My younger brother dare not enter my room without knocking, not to talk of standing after seeing my wife naked. Except he wants to explain his real intentions towards my wife

You my brother has a warped reasoning for not even trusting your own blood brother with your wife..smh

johnson232:

We are all wired differently bro...U acting that way doesn't make it right....
See the way u talk am sef...Na people like u they kill their brother because of woman...

Read the op with a recommended glass & see her husband's response....that is how any sensible man should act & not threatening thunder....guess your brother is not trustworthy...

Yep, also thought d man did well. Might even have d plan of calling his brother at d back to tell him to knock next time b4 entering his room but just doesn't want d wife to know to avoid unnecessary controversy.

Madam, hope you have not been looking for an opportunity to chase the poor guy out of your house before? Search your conscience because i don't know why you are making issues out of this matter.

At your age and status as a married woman, many people would have seen your unclothedness without you even knowing.

It is just an accident, move on and see the incident as if it never happened.

Caustics:
kikikikikikiki hehehehehe hohohohoho

I'm also laughing in mutliple languages right now

faksy:
OP, What if you are the one on bed and your husband is unclad while your immediate sister suddenly enter without a notice, and she wait for minutes trying to be sorry.
what would be ur reaction at present and later on?

Don't be coy.

A two years old knows females generally have higher regard for their nakkedness than males. A woman's reaction to a nakked man is VERY different from man's reaction to a nakked woman.

That said, I do think OP perhaps is overreacting. The guy has apologized. regarding the issue with knocking, yes well all agree it simple courtesy, but how often do we keep to it? While staying with my sister, I know the number of times I entered their room without knocking (forgot to knock) and on occasion saw her in her glory. I quickly apologised and zoomed out. Life goes on.

Davash222:

Can't she lock the door knowing she's UNCLAD

Lock door when She's with her husband in their room?For God sake, the so called brother inlaw is stupid to have jumped into the room without knocking. The husband should talk to his brother.

richyblink1:


How did people like this end up here. You referred someone's wife as a bitch. Speaks volume of your background

Don't forget that some girls once they start living with a guy at home they will start answering wife, and another question is has the guy and his brother been living together before the girl came in. An accident is an accident no matter how you put it, and in this situation apology is well deserved and which was rendered. And 2 things again is either she envy or attracted to her brother in law, if non then she should forget about it and act like if it never happened.

Berbierklaus:

Exactly,especially a married woman's room,I don't dare enter my aunt's room without knocking even when her husband is not there,that's just total lack of respect....

Jeeez,I find it really annoying that some people are saying no big deal about it,worst still the husband's reaction, like really? My husband better not try that with me

OP you better be stern and firm with that your brother in-law, call him,and tell him squarely never to enter your room without knocking and waiting for a response before entering.

And watch your back,I don't trust that your husband and brother in-law.
Better still buy key and make sure you lock that door when you are inside,I do that to my room,so I'm used to it.

Why are you trying to fuel hatred in their family. It's done already and it may not happen again. So why are these comments. If I'm the one, I will do it exactly what the husband did. It's easy for your wife to understand.

Abeg, don't cause problem between the man and his brother. I wouldn't allow such to happen to me provided it wasn't cause by my brother.

StarPlayer:
You my brother has a warped reasoning for not even trusting your own blood brother with your wife..smh

No mind am. such sick comments here.

hollywater:
Lock door when She's with her husband in their room?For God sake, the so called brother inlaw is stupid to have jumped into the room without knocking. The husband should talk to his brother.

Bros it's an accident. Nothing can rewind the hands of time.
Stop feeling a potential hatred in an already peaceful relationship and family. The husband should be angry yet he understood it. Let the wife try to understand it.

I read a joke and women were asked if they will bath outside unclad for N100m, and all of them said yes. The brother worth more.
Let Love Lead

Maybe he should behead his brother for his silly mistake. Sister you are taking it too far

alezzy13:


No mind am. such sick comments here.

Do you mind those stupid boys trying to live in illusion. They are the type that fight their families when they marry.

Simple understanding of the event has become a problem for them. Trying to impress Nland ladies for likes

There are some grey areas to this story and some questions needs to be asked.
What type of apartment do you guys live in? Flat or face-me-i -face-you?
What is your relationship with the said BIL? Do you guys get along or is it like cats and rats managing to live together.

Even at that a few points to note:
You said yourself that you saw him out side a few moment ago, so probably he taught you were still outside or in the bathroom and its still his Brother that's in the room.

What was he coming to do in the room? If he was coming to deliver a shocking or an exciting news or he may simply be in a hurry and he might have momentarily forgotten his manners.
I guess it was a mistake. You also for one reason or another made a mistake by not locking the door.
You seem even more angered by the fact that he stood there apologising, we have different ways of reacting to situations he might just be shocked, and with you diving under the bed he probably needs a moment or too to process it all. If he wants to make a stupid move on you he won't do when his brother is around.

As for you husbands reaction, I belief hi reaction is in order. A wise married man needs to be careful in the way when there is an issue between his wife and his relatives. Believe me one side will always accuse him of taking side with the other. Hence am sure he will call his brother when in your absence and talk to him.

My take on the matter, it was a mistake. The guy is as ashamed and embarrassed as you are. pls move on no need escalating the matter by reporting to other family members.

PaperLace:
I would have thought secondary schools are on mid term break, going by some juvenile comments here.

OP, you reserve the right to feel the way you feel. I will feel the same way. It's worrying that he comes into your matrimonial room without knocking, you didn't set the boundaries before now. He even stood there apologising, apologising while staring at your unclothedness and your husband didn't react? Nawa!!

It should hurt that your husband dismissed it like that. He isn't expected to kill his brother, but I expected him to show more seriousness. They both don't have any much respect for you.

Call the brother and warn him sternly never to enter your room, with/without knocking. He shouldn't even come close to your room. Try to forget about it, I can imagine how you feel _it's normal, but you'll be fine.

Don't forget that some girls once they start living with a guy at home they will start answering wife, and another question is has the guy and his brother been living together before the girl came in. An accident is an accident no matter how you put it, and in this situation apology is well deserved and which was rendered. And 2 things again is either she envy or attracted to her brother in law, if non then she should forget about it and act like if it never happened. You don't have to act like a judge with this your division write up.

Not funny.

Caustics:
kikikikikikiki hehehehehe hohohohoho

Your Son And His Big Problem (attah's Concept) (episode 4)

That moment a teacher thinks he knows it all, and finally meets his crazy superior. Watch this EXTREMELY FUNNY VIDEO, YOUR SON AND HIS BIG PROBLEM.
Watch:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXsxFQgbTWQ

Davash222:
Aunty, no cause for alarm. There's a big difference between to SEE and to TASTE.

Stay cool with him.

And both seeing and tasting will pass away after a short while. He can't remember what he saw nor describe the taste either.

Someone said your brother in law is eyeing you somehow but I guess you feel the same too

richyblink1:


Kindly read well or get a recommended glass. I am male for your information, and married as well. My younger brother dare not enter my room without knocking, not to talk of standing after seeing my wife naked. Except he wants to explain his real intentions towards my wife

It's standard practice to always knock before entering anyone's room or office so you don't get to see or involve yourself in things you ordinarily won't be involved in and I agree with you. Even if it wasn't uncles but an office where meetings are bein held or what if it was robbery and he just bashed in and gets a bullet nko?
So I completely agree

However, in a domestic circumstance like this, many reasons could influence the brother bashing in probably movement in the family is such a free flow that they used to entering each others room. They probably might not be in the brother house but insted but a family house. Even the wife who is complaining could bensending that same brother to pick up something in their room so often he used to entering comfortably and many more reasons like that. So if all these is possible, only one thing makes sense, always lock your door when you in the room and you need it privacy. If your lock isn't good, you fix it cos you need it else, you might get bashing in so many times. Even your kids can bash in on you while sexing cos the were playing cat and mouse but once that lock is there, they are reminded that it's a restricted area.

Even personally, I can't tell the number of times my sister in law has bashed in on me or me and my wife. I already anticipate it could happen anytime so I don't really leave room for errors or I just d
After all said and done, the op shouldn't be be upset and let things be

tonquendo4u:
It's called sister inlaw. Not friend in law. His sisters stand naked in front of him. So this 1 is his sister now. By law

so peoples sisiter still stand unclad before their brothers


I and my sisters started hiding from age 12.

Lol. Here to read comments. I love Nairaland o. Hehehehehahahahahahahahahahaha.. Somebori hold me o. My husband is wondering wetin dey amuse me dis early mor mor.

iyaayi:
My live in brother in law of whom we are agemates barged into my room unannounced this morning. I was totally naked & had to dive under the bed from the shame & shock.

He stood there apologising that he didn't know i was in the room (we had met outside by the clothes line a short while ago).
The most painful part is that my husband who was lying in d bed in the room didn't find it necessary to utter a word.
When I confronted him, he said that shebi his brother had said 'sorry'
I really don't know what to do. I feel let down by hubby's reaction & also ashamed about the whole incident.
pls good folks, what do I do to redress the situation. thank you

In as much as you are living under the same roof with any body, this type of situation is likely to occur no matter how careful you are. So it not a big deal. Think positively.

babajero:
Don't forget that some girls once they start living with a guy at home they will start answering wife, and another question is has the guy and his brother been living together before the girl came in. An accident is an accident no matter how you put it, and in this situation apology is well deserved and which was rendered. And 2 things again is either she envy or attracted to her brother in law, if non then she should forget about it and act like if it never happened. You don't have to act like a judge with this your division write up.

If you guys think it's okay for the BIL to stand for however long it took him to apologise, while she scampered for cover, in her own matrimonial room _ I don't think it's okay!

I don't care how long they have been living before she came in, she is his wife and that's all I care about. If the husband has apologised and made her feel relaxed, I am sure she won't be here. The way he dismissed it is her grouse, not all these nonsense I am reading here of her wanting him to pursue the brother.