₦airaland Forum

jannyblue:
useless stingy guys.... my own boyfriend was so stingy that common recharge card he cannot buy...and his working lol
they will tell u 'I don't want to spoil u with money... my sister run for your life
thank God we are not together again

Did you give him anything likewise?

Please don't mention sex. Thank you

parasites everywhere.what happened to your parents.what do you contribute to his life.Tomorrow now when he dumps you,you will tell us you did everything for him.Nonsense.let us parent take care of you.your bride price is not free

SO, HOW DO YOU GET THE LITTLE YOU SPEND?

hmmmmm....u need advice?? lemme consult the gods

AmazingM:
Good evening my dear nairalanders. Please I need your honest opinion on this issue because I am very confused now that I don't know what to do.

I have been dating a guy for about three years now. Every thing has been going well. He claims he loves me but he doesn't spend on me. He knows I am still job hunting that I don't have any means of income of my own but he doesn't care at all. How I feed, cloth, recharge my phone, he doesn't know. He doesn't even ask how I cope with all my basic needs as a woman. He doesn't recharge my phone and when I manage to recharge with the little money I have and call him, he won't even reject or ignore the call and call me back knowing well that I don't work. He will make sure he exhausts the little airtime.

It is not as I he doesn't have the money, he has it. In fact he is very comfortable but he doesn't spend on me. I am a type of lady that doesn't know how to ask for money but I expect him to know that since I am not working yet, he should assist me with some of my needs but if I don't ask, he will do nothing.

I am thinking of leaving him because of this attitude I feel he is taking advantage of my nature. Please help me out. I want to know your take on this issue before I take action.

Thank you.

Are you resident in Ph? You sound like a Ph babe, who never believes a guy can be spent on as well. Even in your "Kori State", have you gotten him anything before?

call him and ask him the reason for his actions, even if u are not the demanding type as u claimed, he still needs to meet some of your few needs no love without giving. u said he's comfortable so he should be able to put smiles in your face.Do you know that he might be thinking he is not he only man in your life and that u have someone somewhere doing those things so let him know where he is lacking in his duty and from his response u can judge what he meant I'd he truly loves you.

Adaumunocha:
Babe should look for something doing no matter how small. Never put your hope in man but in God.

Pls what are the pros of a stingy boyfriend.I will appreciate your reply

kimbraa:
You don't need a soothsayer to tell you he doesn't love you. You're dating yourself in this relationship.

#Sad!.

you cant be sure. there are guys who have a policy not to give money to girls they are dating. they could be doing other romantics stuff and gifts but not taking care of her financial obligations

Divay22:
Forget the idiot..
He's broke himself

so he's an idiot cos hes broke yet you that you're also broke is. ....

cristianisraeli:
must everything be about money for you nigerian women?

cant she go and get a menial job??i can give you examples of some

remember the guy have his own cross to carry and they are not even married yet

Tell me which part of the world that guys doesn't take care of their women? The fact that the dotch system (50/50) is applied in the white men's land doesn't mean they don't care at all for their women Nigeria guys are just looking for excuses. If you cannot take care of a woman then why involving in a relationship?

mikolo80:
so he's an idiot cos hes broke yet you that you're also broke is. ....

Goan read and understand his first comment, before you quote me...
My last reply to you.

Adaumunocha:
Its you westerners that are championing this broke girls nonsense. Right from time we know you people don't take care of ladies. Very stingy set of people.

we don't wait till we're old or steal money to marry.money will come but the womb clock will not wait for that time. And we don't marry underage girls

I don't spend much on bae and she love me






u broke die.！

Ifakiland:
U from the east that they take care of and still use ur hubby money to fork around nko?
Igbo married woman and the easiest milfs to fork cos they married rich old bastards as hubbys

case in point

mikolo80:
we don't wait till we're old or steal money to marry.money will come but the womb clock will not wait for that time. And we don't marry underage girls

Safiaa:
Shes already said that he is comfortable and doing well for himself. If he doesn't have money, then thats understandable.

how do you know comfortable person. Does she know if his mother has cancer or kidney problem.no be by packaging o. Enough struggle de the land that guys will not say out loud

MhizzAJ:
She's trying her best nah at least she's not the demanding type..All she's asking for is a little bit of care.

The motive of some guys is just to take as much as they can from a lady.

what has he taken.
Make she go find dangote pikin maywe hia word

Dasherz:
@ lawlahdey I don't think it's got anything to do with her resilience... shes not a random lady to him but a date of 3 years ... from the look of it the dude is just stuck up on spending or maybe he has a logic of not spending on a lady


OP .. I believe you should complain to him in the calmest manner possible, don't raise your voice at him and don't put up any fronting attitude .. just tell him this is what you want calmly and let him do the thinking

see pesin with sense

lastmaster:
Nice one.i have experienced this before. My ex was a broke girl, I always give her everything she needed, but greed killed her.Ranging from money to fix her hair, get her clothes, pads, undies, cream, etc.I always buy her foodstuffs.In addition, gives her 20k monthly.I was even trying to establish her before the last straw that broke the carmel's back. There is this friend of her that advice her wrongly that I am not taking adequate care of her, that she have to look for another man.She listened to her friend, and got one guy. the same friend came to me and told me that my girlfriend is dating another guy.she told me everything on how to get her red handed, I followed her instructions and I caught my girlfriend in an hotel with the guy.To cut the story short, I quit the parasitic relationship for the past 2yrs; she is still pleading with me to accept her up till now, that it was her friend that gave her the wrong advice. I plainly told her that I am not a dog that will go back to its own vomit.Since then, I know the kind of money I have saved. Guys, never date a broke girl because you will become poorer.Instead, flow with the rich ones.

Girls that take bad advice from their friends do because they want to. All that glitters is not gold and we don't appreciate what we have till its gone. For her to be begging you to take her back,it means she learnt her lesson in a hard way and i would advise you not to take her back because materialism has totally corrupted her mind. If you take her back,she might wait till you make a lot of money in the future and kill you for your properties because someone that can do something of such now has shown the type of person she is and it would only get worse in her as she gets older and she would hide her type of person,behave like an angel till she pulls pro gold digging on you by killing you in future. And i would urge you not to date broke girls again,there are lots of beautiful rich girls. If you want to spend money on a girl,spend it on a rich girl cos she would spend more on you later on and not love you for your money cos money is nothing to her. Hope you heard at a point in time that Beyonce bought Private Jet for Jayz for his birthday,Kim K bought a Lamb for Kanye for his birthday. Thats how rich girls role if you date a poor girl and you are a rich boy if you spend on her,she will love you for your money and she might dump you for a richer guy if she sees any,no matter how much you spend on her,she would compare it to what another rich guy,maybe a money miss road that spends super lavishly on his girl,if you don't spend on her,she would see you as wicked,she will see you as proud,hate your achievements and may grow wanting to see you fall to be come humble to her level,everything you do,she will term it as pride because you are rich,she might appear awed by your newer achievements but she feels hate and envy inside her and she starts talking about some stupendously rich guys that are way richer than you and their achievements for you to feel poor like she is feeling and for you to be more humble because everything you do,she terms as pride no matter how humble you are. Broke girls are for broke boys,rich girls are for rich guys.

Divay22:
But you'll admire a slay queen when you see one, is somebody not taking care of that queen you admire,will the heavens fall on you if you take care of your own for others to admire.
The truth is bitter, accept it..you're stingy..

My last reply to your mention.

why is slay queen poshuing me if she's happy with the maga. Go marry dem na make dem take una do ritual

jashar:
[size=8pt][/size]

Biko, it's derogatory to call a human a bitch. But, I totally get what you're saying.

My bad. I apologize for the offensive word. I was too engrossed in driving home my point that I got caught up in using the foul slang. Mind you, I'm not against showering monetary love to your loved one, but how many girls will reciprocate same if the situation is flipped.
After all they are quick to mention their disdain for broke guys and also show hatred for stingy guys, everything pointing to the fact that relationship must be a win win for them. Love isn't always win win. What can I say to a generation that believes that money equates love.?
Seems my first opinion is not good enough, so lemme align this new opinion to the op and thousands of sisters there and here goes
Abeg the guy doesn't love you joor op
Do yourself a favour and break up with him. I'm sure he stands to lose.
move on with a guy who is a big time spender on his woman.
I'm sure you will be happy with him. Because that's all happiness ever mean in this text, chat, tweet and twerk world.

MaritzaNL:
The guy no even love am sef, if a guy love a girl, he will go extra miles to care for her.

Chei
And una husband go believe say dem get wife for house. May financial calamity not befall them cos na only moni una loyal to

imustsaymymindo:
If you want to recieve op, you have to give, that is the principle. For the fact you have no source of income does not mean you can't give him something. Give him qualitative time, give him attention, you can decide to cook his favourite meal for him, you can go to his house and take care of it for him. He would reciprocate by giving you something in return and not neccessarily money. Be contented with what you have @op.

If you are afraid that he may be the stingy type, find out how he gives to family, friends and strangers before you judge.

end of discussion

AmazingM:
Good evening my dear nairaland erstwhile.

I am thinking of leaving him because of this attitude I feel he is taking advantage of my nature. Please help me out. I want to know your take on this issue before I take action.

Thank you.

My dear, I don't think that guy loves you. Better you start making alternatives for yourself.. Is he even showing you off? As a guy, I hate men like that, Be wise Pls.

kennygee:
A lot of young men these days are just trying to Dodge their responsibility, shebi our grand dads and even some of our dads were sole providers, if you check, most of such marriages are still intact.

Young men want women who are not "liabilities" mostly because they want to eat their cake and have it.

I'm all for financial independence as a woman, but be sure you're not dating or planning a man who sees a lottery ticket in you.

Such men will abandon their financial obligations to you after marriage. My aunty dey suffer am now.

You want a woman to submit to you, love you, Cook for you, get pregnant, give birth, raise your kids and yet, you are demanding she shares ur financial obligations with you.

If a woman decides to help out in a marriage financially, its a choice, its not an obligation.

It is the man who is obligated to provide financially.

If the man is not married to you yet, pls look out for signs that he'd be able to take care of you and your kids when you're married.

Its when you're dating or courting that you should be able to enjoy the money and gifts of your partner because marriage is financially demanding.

Love is giving, i ain't saying women should be gold diggers, heck, women make their own money these days, I'm just saying just cause you have your money as a woman doesn't mean you should marry a stingy man.

You'd go broke marrying such a man.

I believe the reason there is a high rate of divorce these days is because women have become financially independent and can walk away from a marriage they are no longer tolerant of.

In the past, because woman no get means of trainimg her kids, ah go manage the marriage.

The guy should give at least sometimes as the girl is broke but a boyfriend owes no girl financial duties as the girlfriend does not owe a guy wifey duties; they are not married yet. Where are her parents if one may ask?

kimbraa:
You don't need a soothsayer to tell you he doesn't love you. You're dating yourself in this relationship.






#Sad!.

U jst said wot's on my mind.
D guy in question does nt even want to see her @all again nt 2 talk of loving her. He wants to frustrate u so u'll leave him alone,cos if he tells u directly dat he doesn't love u,u'll feel sumhw dejected nd emotional.
Girl,d handwriting is on d wall.Run for ur dear life.

erico2k2:
Person wey dey struggle to charge fone U say make dem Buy perfume, is dis how U use to DO

.Lmao! I'm sure it's not so bad to that extent now. OK, she could even get him fruits(apples with #500 or #600) That's not so much to give someone you love and besides, no one rejects apples ...or even something nice that's not so expensive *smiles* .
But the guy sef na confirm "Stinginus" Lol

RETIREDMUMU:
see this one, this is how liability wifey created, is he your hubby or ur fada, can you be independent without, baby i want to do my hair, i want to buy cream, bqby baby buy me sawama, hey baby my monthly pad is almost finished.....

try to have life yall broke girl

bro I know u will stingy

kizyalex10:
my dear,every man has his own testing method,nd I fall into the category of nt giving a woman money,for me I don't do that because iam stingy but to know her ability to cope with me when iam broke nd her ability to manage situations,most ladies have failed this test,even d one gainfully employed.(thou mine started with a bad experience I had while growing up)a man most times love to marry a lady who love is greater than his.if a lady loves a man more,she will tolerate his short comings ndd d marriage will last till eternity.believe me,most men that do it even d rich re nt. Doing because they re stingy but the ability to knw if u can manage d whealth when u see them,cos if money doesn't thrill u,when u see plenty of it,it won't still change u or ur personality.am nt saying for sure that he is testing u but thatz what happens in most cases.the girl iam dating currently,i don't give her money,neither is she gainfully employed yet.still job hunting.but I don't spend on her either,i jst do it once in a blue moon.nd it's jst little ones I do.nd she have proved beyond reasonable doubt that she is a wonderful creature.iam gonna propose to her very soon.i promised myself that am gonna buy her a car on the wedding day.like I said,most guys do it but must have their reasons like I have mine,nd d few guys I encountered have d same mentality as I do.

You do it once in a blue moon, he has never done it. Do you guys intentionally turn blind eyes to some part of a story?

And if I may ask, you've been dating your girl for how long?

I cannot marry such a guy, never my dear. Even if he is testing you, he should not over do it. 3yrs is more than enough for a guy to know that you are not after his money. Simply, he is the stingy type.

iammaKING:
What mumu resilience ...The guy is damn stingy jare...She better wake up and look for someone better..!

You see your life?...She shouldn't be looking for someone better, she should be looking for a job. You lot needs to get your priorities straight.

kennygee:
A lot of young men these days are just trying to Dodge their responsibility, shebi our grand dads and even some of our dads were sole providers, if you check, most of such marriages are still intact.

Young men want women who are not "liabilities" mostly because they want to eat their cake and have it.

I'm all for financial independence as a woman, but be sure you're not dating or planning a man who sees a lottery ticket in you.

Such men will abandon their financial obligations to you after marriage. My aunty dey suffer am now.

You want a woman to submit to you, love you, Cook for you, get pregnant, give birth, raise your kids and yet, you are demanding she shares ur financial obligations with you.

If a woman decides to help out in a marriage financially, its a choice, its not an obligation.

It is the man who is obligated to provide financially.

If the man is not married to you yet, pls look out for signs that he'd be able to take care of you and your kids when you're married.

Its when you're dating or courting that you should be able to enjoy the money and gifts of your partner because marriage is financially demanding.

Love is giving, i ain't saying women should be gold diggers, heck, women make their own money these days, I'm just saying just cause you have your money as a woman doesn't mean you should marry a stingy man.

You'd go broke marrying such a man.

I believe the reason there is a high rate of divorce these days is because women have become financially independent and can walk away from a marriage they are no longer tolerant of.

In the past, because woman no get means of trainimg her kids, ah go manage the marriage.

high rate of divorce because women choose wrong men out of desperation

Marsnizz:
Pls another thing is to put him on test like three time. the steps to follow are:
(1) Ask him to lend you some money like #5000 promising to pay back in one week time .watch his reaction. if he gives you the money without complain and conditions,collect and keep it making sure that at the elapse of the week promised to pay back,the money is return to him .Give him back and tell him thank you .Watch his reaction. If he refuse to collect it then persuade him to collect,telling him something like " I borrowed this money from you to pay back because I wasn't in position at that time so have it .I don't want to be a burden of responsibility " watch his actions carefully. If he insisted on you having the money freely with smile on his face without a frown then collect it and say thank you very much at most two time. Dancing accurately to this show signs of freewill
(2) secondly ask him to advice you that a friend is disturbing you to borrow her #15000,you have the money with you already but you are scared of letting it out but she was desperately in need. listen to his response. if he outrightly, stop you from assisting your friend that need help then put it in mind that he might not help your friends and family so easily.
(3) finally .Tell him you are confused,seeking an advice from him .That your small brother or sister is dragging with you,for the pomade that you used your money in buying,you don't like it and can't change the cream for another one to stop her because she also like it more than you. Be quiet and listen to his advice. If he advise you to leave the cream for her/him and buy same for yourself and stop dragging for one and in case, you can buy next, buy two of it .One for yourself and one for them .But if he advise you to stop anyone from using your belonging,your brother or sister as of that matter . know that this guy must be stingy and cannot easily sacrifice something for another person. Therefore, you should be logical about number 3 because it may sound to him as your family is too poor to the extend of sharing common cream .I mean if he don't know your family too well . make sure, you give a gap of weeks or month in between this three trials and you will come back to tell me thank you

cest fini