₦airaland Forum

ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

ofegge73:
these days her father is the one who calls me on behalf of the children, she doesn't call or answer, even when the children need medical attention. I have never seen a thing like this. But I always remind her, not to drag the kids into the fray.,as they are innocent of everything.

ofegge73:
thank you all for your contributions, I have learnt the hard way.

ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

hedonistic:
Another 'nice guy' bites the dust. You were dating a so-called Corper serving in Cross River State (who was of course fucking a couple of guys there) and she was visiting you in Lagos every weekend - for which you were paying for flight tickets EVERY WEEKEND (minus other standard mende mende expenses)? ? ? As who or as what? As per say you be Aliko Dangote's abi wetin? Why do you re.ta.rded nice guy fools spend so much money on worthless idiots? Well whatever happened to you serves you right.

That said I should reiterate the Gospel truth: love is a scam. Don't take any girl seriously. Don't think you should go out of your way to do anything or commit to her because you think you love her and vice versa. Don't ever get emotional. They're all mostly scammers. What's there to gain for you as a man? Nothing. Any bitch can give you sex. Any bitch can give you a child (verified by. DNA). But this whole relationship, commitment and marriage thing is too one-sided (in favour of females) and often has NO meaningful benefit to the man. It only comes with unnecessary pain and woes. If you see a pretty face, ass, hips, boobs or whatever else that tickles your lust just Bleep it and move on. Catching feelings always leads to these kinds of miserable outcomes.

kimbraa:
Where exactly did you meet this lady that from when you married her, she chose her parents abode to her matrimonial home? That she's threatening your life is enough reason to divorce her and make sure she doesn't set eyes on your kids after a paternity test confirmation they're yours. This one didn't have marriage on her agenda.

What you need is legal counsel and your lawyer is in the best situation to help with that.

ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

Doctorfitz:
Women are not meant to be pampered most times. Them go tell Una, Una no go hear word .

Pape leave that woman straight up ..



To all those blind in love I greet Una, to all those yelling on their parents friends and relatives saying 'I'm not a kid I know what I'm doing.i'll marry her with or without your consent "..I still greet Una...

When yam done pot go empty.

ofegge73:
thank you all for your contributions, I have learnt the hard way.

Dammylois:
I wonder what kind of a woman in her right senses will lv her husband's house to go lv wt her parents... Op how was she she able to convince you sef,who agrees to that?? Well we need to stop crying over spit milk.....You need your life back Sir,file for devorce,get a good lawyer if she lk mk she no show,money is her problem from the look of things,agree to pay fr child support...make sure you have contact with your kids anyhow,i'm sure they will still knw you as their Dad,but hw are we even sure they are your kids?

donstan18:
Can you imagine , She said you can't divorce her or you die , She sees you as a weakling and obviously taking advantage of your gentility and tolerance , and it all started when she trapped and succeeded in marrying you with pregnancy.


I, Donstan will always be the right man to my woman and kids, but will never be a WEAK and POO TOLERATING type of man to her

Below is MY ADVICE.

Question and search yourself very well, If you'v truly searched your mind and self very well to confirm that you don't want her anymore in your life, kindly file a divorce and aswell let your family, her family, your lawyer, legal counsel, friends and the security forces know that she threatened your life.

A mutual agreement will be carried out at the court about your kids, if atall they are your kids, because there's high possibility and tendency of those kids not belonging to you.

Man up and flee from poo!

baby124:
Sorry to tell you this, but the chance that those children are not yours is very high. I advise you to go and conduct a DNA test on them first of all. Second of all, make sure you document all her threats and report it to the police station. Including the lies told against you by her mother and brother. Ensure that all 3 of them are invited by the police, detained and told to write a signed statement that if any harm should come to you, they will be held responsible. Then go ahead and file for your divorce and run for your life. She cannot stop you from divorcing her in court. If she like, she should not respond. Just make sure you get a good and competent lawyer to help you through the possible criminal side and another good divorce lawyer for the divorce side. Please run for your life and do not take violent threats as a joke.

Ayomide93:
Gosh, how about your mom and future daughter? Will they turn out like the ones you described here?

ofegge73:
these days her father is the one who calls me on behalf of the children, she doesn't call or answer, even when the children need medical attention. I have never seen a thing like this. But I always remind her, not to drag the kids into the fray.,as they are innocent of everything.