ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

Get another woman.

kanu is indeed. a jew.He knw/have reason why he tagged his pipu PIGS and PROSTITU2..spit

OP first of all conduct a DNA on those kids to know if u are truly their father.

ipobarecriminals:
kanu is indeed. a jew.He knw/have reason why he tagged hus pipu PIGS and PROSTITU2..spit

You are nothing but efulefu

Whose kids are you talking about? Your wife sleeps around and you still call those kids yours. Have you done a DNA? Even if the kids are certified yours after NDA, let her go with them if she wishes or has doctors told you that you cannot have more kids? Stop giving yourself problems that are not existing. If I say don't marry Anambra girls now, Obi if Onitsha and his keyboard warriors will ask for my head.

Anyway, we have heard your own side of the story. Now go and tell her that Nairaland High Court has summoned her to come and tell her own side before we deliver our judgement.

op first step do dna testing of d children, if they r urs keep them and kick that snake out don't b a weakling

First of all find out if these kids are really yours by doing DNA with out her knowing to find out if u are the really father. Be fore u take d next action

Bros, you won't die if you divorce her. She is jittery because she is afraid of the consequence of her actions.
You have lost this wife or maybe she was never yours. File for divorce. Get a good lawyer. Request DNA of the children as part of your prayers before the court. Be prayerful. It's a very painful experience and I feel for you but you have to take the hard decision to save your life. Don't rush into another marriage until you are settled and can think clearly.

this story does not add up

Acidosis:
Although you didn't mention this; I'm 200% sure your marriage is intertribal.

This is one of those prices you have to pay for refusing to listen to elders in the game because you f00lishly assumed the love you have for each other can overcome everything
It only works on rare occasions: (i) when the parties involved are extremely wealthy; (ii) when either or both parties involved are orphans; (iii) when either or both parties is/are ready to act and live as orphans.

Again, you didn't mention this, but I am 400% sure your parents/relative warned you and told you to watch, but well, you listened to pathetically blind deceivers who told you marriage is between you and your spouse only. You listened to those telling you you're a man, and since you're above 18, you can take all decisions by yourself. Well you took this, but the consequences, you've got to bare alone.

Before you marry any woman, you should be sure you know her father/mother's attitude. You should be sure you can cope with their ways of life. Even if you married an angel, it only takes an emotionally intelligent parent to frustrate your home. You see all these new generational lovers who claim to marry their spouses 2 weeks, 1 week, etc. after DMs? They're not to be followed as role models.

You met a lady and in few months, you told yourself "after all, some people got married two weeks after meeting on tu-wee-ta (twitter)" You don't know where those ones are headed, but still you choose to follow them. There are people who have been married for 20 - 30 years, but we always consider them as "old schools".

You allowed those awwnn and awww from pathetic romance freaks lure you to the pit. Now you're in, and they're everywhere again looking for another shocking tu-wee-ta wedding story to type those awwnn, awww, to decieve some new breeds.

On point..

Sorry oo

Bros please don't let a woman intimidate you. File for divorce and do DNA test on those kids if they are yours.

nwakibie3:


You are nothing but efulefu

nwakibie3:


You are nothing but efulefu

why are u so "pained" abi nah me kal una PIGS/prostitu2? Abeg op,send d bastard outa ur house b4 she kee u

Women are not meant to be pampered most times. Them go tell Una, Una no go hear word .

Pape leave that woman straight up ..



To all those blind in love I greet Una, to all those yelling on their parents friends and relatives saying 'I'm not a kid I know what I'm doing.i'll marry her with or without your consent "..I still greet Una...

When yam done pot go empty.

[quote author=donstan18 post=65155408] Can you imagine , She said you can't divorce her or you die , She sees you as a weakling and obviously taking advantage of your gentility and tolerance , and it all started when she trapped and succeeded in marrying you with pregnancy.

if you must kill your enemy make SURE he is totally eliminated 49 laws of power....kill her first before she kills you simple...That is the only solution..if possible the brother and mother should follow too..No kidding here...If not bro, na your obituary we go dey see soon.EXPERIENCE! i repeat bro it is code red..kill her

Go and do a paternity test on your children

ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

What you need at this point is to take a break:
then focus on the children:
shift your focus off her as if she doesn't exist
free yourself from bitterness by forgiving her,
accept responsibility for your situation,
reassess essence of life and identify life's priority,
identify your divine purpose by either accepting Christ or rededicating yourself to him,
thus peace of God beyond human understanding shall be yours.
May God help you. Amen.

[quote author=donstan18 post=65155408] Can you imagine , She said you can't divorce her or you die , She sees you as a weakling and obviously taking advantage of your gentility and tolerance , and it all started when she trapped and succeeded in marrying you with pregnancy.


SECONDED

donstan18:
Can you imagine , She said you can't divorce her or you die , She sees you as a weakling and obviously taking advantage of your gentility and tolerance , and it all started when she trapped and succeeded in marrying you with pregnancy.


I, Donstan will always be the right man to my woman and kids, but will never be a WEAK and POO TOLERATING type of man to her

Below is MY ADVICE.

Question and search yourself very well, If you'v truly searched your mind and self very well to confirm that you don't want her anymore in your life, kindly file a divorce and aswell let your family, her family, your lawyer, legal counsel, friends and the security forces know that she threatened your life.

A mutual agreement will be carried out at the court about your kids, if atall they are your kids, because there's high possibility and tendency of those kids not belonging to you.

Man up and flee from poo!

Well said bro.

ofegge73:
Good evening Nairalanders, I have no idea how to go about making this as clear as possible, but truth is I married a stranger.
I met this Lady in 2012,we became friendly, and talked on consistently.
At the time she was on NYSC in Ikom cross River State. By the way she is from Obosi in Anambra state.
She was visiting me in Lagos every week, of course I paid for her flight tickets back and forth for all the times she visited till we got married and beyond. I have never let her use the bus or public transport to anywhere, it's either I drive her, she drives or a taxi.
A few months to her passing out, she told me she was pregnant, so I thought I would marry her and cut the drama short, but that was my undoing.
We got married, but all through, she spent more time with her parents and siblings.
Fast forward to 2016,my wife got a job through my sister in Abuja, and everything got worse, she wouldn't get back home till very late everyday.
Her explanation was that her boss delayed her.
I got to find out she was dating her boss later, even caught her at hotels in ikeja G. R,.A and on the island with her boss at very odd hours of the night.
Don't get me wrong, I am okay, I live in a 5 bedroom duplex in ikeja, the house is very comfortable and cosy, and almost completing my personal building at awoyaya in ibeju. i am not a poor man.
Well, she gave birth to my first child a boy, but insisted on C. S, then my daughter, through C. S too. All were elective!
She wouldn't come back home,and spent more time at her parents than in our home, always saying she needs herMum to watch the kids,while she is out, we got maids, but she was so violent with them, they all left.
Fast forward to 2017,i asked my wife to come back home, she refused, well I told her the marriage wouldn't work anymore,as she wasnt living with me for the past two years.
She immediately went and petitioned me at office of the Public defender in Lagos State citing domestic violence, irresponsibility as to my kids and stuff, I have always provided food, toiletries, medicals,as well as pay my children's school fees till this minute. But she teamed up with her Mum and brother to make up so many fabrications because they demanded I pay a stipend to them every month, and I said no, I won't do that, your daughter, my wife is in your house cos she wants to be there, not because I sent her away or anything like that.Her father is the only person who is sane, but the man is a pensioner and can't help himself much, so she treats him with intimidation She reported me to the police and all agencies you can think of, well at last they conducted their investigations and found out she was telling lies.
I am no more interested in keeping her, and she has vowed that I can't divorce her or I die, but my kids are the issue now.
I need sound advice on how to go about this.
Please no mockery, I am in dire need of good advice. Thanks.

Why dont you conduct a DNA test on the children before you conclude they are yours?

For someone to threaten you to your face.....be prayerful and watchful your adversary is trying to devour you.

Protect yourself

op act e dey abroad with laws, divorce law do not work in naija

.@Op u don sufa.But it is not too late.If u still have mother like patience (dat artist not mama peace oo)and family, go court. Do the paternity of the kids.if dey are urs good but if not,kick dem out with dat useless wife.

You would've asked questions about where she came from. It's a norm nah. Confirm that the children belongs to you and invite the two families so, you don't die before your time.
God is your muscle

cooltola:
op act e dey abroad with laws, divorce law do not work in naija

Which kain mumu divorce. Lols. That's y I won't do court marriage. If u do anyhow, na ur pale house straight up

Marriage is not easy as we all have our own peculiar challenges but this your own has already gone out of hand. The best thing is to seek custody of your children and divorce since you are a good hearted man. I just pray my own wife no matter the circumstances will not open her mouth to threaten me because I won't be nice.

I wonder what kind of a woman in her right senses will lv her husband's house to go lv wt her parents... Op how was she she able to convince you sef,who agrees to that?? Well we need to stop crying over spit milk.....You need your life back Sir,file for devorce,get a good lawyer if she lk mk she no show,money is her problem from the look of things,agree to pay fr child support...make sure you have contact with your kids anyhow,i'm sure they will still knw you as their Dad,but hw are we even sure they are your kids?

Reason a man said he cannot marry to a woman he cannot slap.

Consequential sufferings. Do not commit formication. Wait till you are married before you start having sex. The consequences of disobedience are always waiting for you.
Now since the marriage has a faulty foundation, I suggest you go to God in repentance, then start living to please God. It may take time for this wound to heal. May God help you