₦airaland Forum

Twoclans:


Yours is even more bae

Lol... everything's soft

Orgym:
forgiveness is the key brother! a devil you know is better then unknown angel. Religiously, marriage is a contract to be terminated if one of d two die.

@bolded,

Absolute Nonsense!

milemimi93:
If I tell you my story you would cry.. The judge that handle my case even told me if he was in my shoes he would do same.. To fulfilled all righteousness I was given a jail term..

I had to leave the country after serving term cause more hoes would have dropped. Thanks to my psychologist..


I hate y'all women mostly naija girls

O my God! Hope it's not what I'm thinking?

It's cool you seeing a therapist. I just knew you must have been hurt pretty badly to exude such hate. It's time to let go of it.

Crane1:
Op, I am of the opinion that you forgive her and reconcile your home... Of a truth, you are deeply hurt and pained, yes day by day, you may struggle to be bold, but deep down, you still will feel a miss of a companion, your daughter and lots more...

Op, as long as you will at one point in your life think about that incident, it will always hurt you, and will add another burden on you, for it is gonna be too great a burden to bear.

Note, am not supporting whatever she did, infact condemnable, but a particular moment she realised her sin against you, pleaded that even her parents are begging, it could be genuine and this is the tym to forgive her and get your home back. Please Op, you family is your great asset first in this world, it is a channel to peace and more of God blessing.

How be it, you have the decision to make as you are the one who feels the pain, but am assuring you that there is a greater thing that awaits you if you forgive, get your family back and live happily again.

My final word @ Op, think about the good moments you once had when you started your family and now that you confirmed the gal is your daughter, and now that you are trying to start all again...

I will advice you follow the way that will leads to true peace in your heart and yet to be in good terms with God.
I wish you the best decision ever.

Special Adviser

freecocoa:
But a cheating man should be forgiven.

This story is even fake but then, una never see anything. These women that get caught, I really wonder how dumb they are..
.

Nothing to wonder coz you lot are usually caught in your craftiness & it's even incredibly stealth when the Almighty God is involved to expose the perpetrator of evil.

U Gerrit?

holyidol:
Fellow Nairalands, we have all spoken well. May the most high God pay each and everyone of us back according to our wishes. This lady we are all talking about now is the best wife of this our brother. Lets forget about this temptation, in any CHALLENGE there is CHANGE" brother if only you can forgive now and forget about all this, you will have the sweetest family ever! If you divorce that lady, am afraid that you can't get someone like her again.

"If you divorce that lady, am afraid that you can't get someone like her again"
Are you reasoning with your Anus?

The first set of comments on this thread is so annoying.how some men will generalise about women.

How about when a woman sacrifices her all for a man, never had carnal knowledge of another man except him,respectfully stayed with him when he was broke,helped him to stand back on his feet.then after all this and more, the man cheats on her and abandons her .

How about many women out there suffering in their marriages,trying so hard to please an unrepentant man?

Please let's learn not to generalise because of a post.yes, from the op's story, the wife is the bad type.just as we have bad husbands.

We should try to be humanist instead of misogynist or misandrist.

CaptJeffry:
Please bro I beg you because of your lovely daughter, forgive that woman but make sure she has truly repented.

Losing your kid or having her suffer the lack of both parental care won't be good for her.

Please forgive since she's been begging and also because her mum is begging too. We all make mistakes.

@bolded,

Nonsense!

Remember she was caught in the act. The question now is, 'is she remorseful'?

mejai:
na codeine o. no mind me.
d main info dey d last statement

Sofry sofry on the codeine, bro

smeag0l:
Guys on nairaland you need to read this to lear A cheating girlfriend or wife will never change even if you give her everything in the world. OP, should I tell you the truth?Your wife was cheating before your turn around of fortunes. She only made it open because she felt you had nothing else to make her stay in the marriage. Let me share with you my personal experience. I was dating this particular girl when I discovered a certain phone number called her on two consecutive nights while she was with me and she refused to pick the calls. Another day, the same number called while we were in a supermarket and she moved a bit far from me to take the call and pretended to continue shopping. I suspected something but kept mute. This was 2 months into the relationship. I now got access to her text messages and whatsapp chats somehow and realized she was having amorous chats with this same guy(with same number that called her all these while) and that the guy even goes to see her sometimes(she stays in Abuja but comes to see me in the city where I stay). I told my personal doctor about my findings and how I planned to ditch this girl immediately because I was angry that I take care of her but she still cheats. I confronted her twice and she denied it and made me look like a fool even when I know the unspeakable things I saw on her chats with the said guy. So my doctor adviced me that he wants me to learn from experience so that I won't make the same mistake in choosing a wife. He told me to take care of her, give her money and good sex and make her comfortable and that he bets with his life that she won't change. So, I did all these, paid for her o go to a make-up school, paid her house rent in Abuja, send her about 50k or sometimes more, every month and I always pay her return ticket from Abuja to where I stay, at least, once every month to see her. Even bought her clothes from boutiques. All these while she still continued cheating(I had access to her phone without her knowing so anytime she is around I check and I still notice same thing). When I confronted her and even told her the full name of the guy after my own investigations, she was shocked and still denied. She went ahead to change her phone password and still continued in her evil ways. All these while, I had cancelled all grand plans I made for her like travelling to Russia together to watch the world cup, going on a vacation together on her birthday to propose to her, helping her get a job as she completed NYSC last year and was looking for a job and plans of marriage when I saw she wouldn't change.Towards the end of last month when she came around, I spoofed her phone through her internet modem and IP address and noticed she was still cheating. At this point, she was still telling me that I need to be giving her money sometimes cos the job she got will be paying her 80k which will not be enough for her After she left, I stopped calling or picking her calls till today and never even told her I've ended the relationship because she doesn't deserve such courtesy. I told my doctor friend and he told me he's happy I learnt and then told me the moral of the story-A cheating woman will always cheat no matter what you do or give to her. He further stated that cheating is not a product of circumstance like people think but a product of upbringing, personality and the kind of friends a lady or guy keeps. I spent about a million and half naira in 4 months in treating her like a queen but nothing changed about the girl's attitude. I wasn't pained by the money cos I used it to learn a lesson as left for me I would have ditched her 4 months ago.

Mr, all these for a cheating girl ? Sponsor my plans nah and you won 't regret. I will definitely pay back, 500k will see me become productive through which i will definitely pay you back. Just consider it if you fit.

infohenry:
Yes,I wedded in Catholic Church don't know of other churches but in court they tell your wife no matter how the love overwhelmed her, she should not give it to the man.

I wedded in a Pentecostal church... My wife was the one the certificate was given to.

ranmoor:
what if he lose his job few months after wedding?

Do you need to ask her this kind of question again? The idiot will divorce him..

This is among reasons I never thought of marriage.... Good luck to guys that are into it.

akbahbah:
You are so dumb and disgusting for saying this rubbish here that marriage certificate comes in two copies and each for husband and wife. That never happens in any part of the world. And fool and local illiterate like you can boldly come out and type this. You suck mehn. In which planet did you do your useless and illegal marriage where 2copies of cert were issued to you and you have guts to even call me names when you are 100% wrong. Na over sabi dey kill people like you. I'm not supposed to answe
r a clown like you in the first place..

I can still recall after seven years. Marriage certificate is in triplicate. But the other person did not put it in the right place. One copy is for the spouse. One copy is for the court or local government registry. The third copy is meant for the church or hall where the marriage took place.

oshe11:
I get your point but one also needs Christ to be able to forgive a cheating wife completely

The same way God sees a cheating wife is the same for a husband. Yes one need Christ to let go of certain things but we note that Christ told us to forgive one another so that our heavenly father can forgive us. If a man refuses to forgive his wife because she committed adultery, Yahweh will not forgive him

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
Your opinion.

Thats why i am entitled to mine

What she did was bad,very bad..but please find a place in your heart to forgive her,. If the table was turned around ,she will still forgive you..infact,it takes maturity and a man enough to forgive,as everyone is shouting leave her,dump her,.u will attract favour from God if you forgive,time heals,.with time you will let go..

angelboy01:
I Am not really good at writing a composition but the whole thing started around last year November when I lost my job at a reputable company, things became really hard that my ex wife started with her attitude, someone I helped through her schooling, even opened a shop for her after our wedding.

She started losing interest in me because I was broke and there was no more love because I couldn't meet up to her demands. She became the bread winner around that time, things didn't go as expected for me, I needed to do a lot of things even pay for the rented apartment we were in and the landlord came with the eviction letter.

Things became really tough that she wasn't sleeping at home anymore, she would leave home for days and come back home and give me some little change and leave again, she started to live with her aunt and I became so lonely and useless in her eyes.

Eventually when I came up with the apartment money and we paid I decided I wasn't going to stay with her for a while and go out and look for a job, so as to avoid fight and arguments. She later called me that her boss from the USA was back and she was to go and meet him because they had a meeting to do so I said OK since I usually speak and text with his boss so I allowed her to go. So after I left home I got a job and I frequented coming home to see her and my baby. I later found out she began to lock her phone and I asked her for the password she wouldn't give it to me so I began to suspect her.

One day I eventually found the password and I unlocked it while she was asleep. I found out through a chat she had with her friend that she had sex with her said boss and she even bought a land without telling me all through the years we were together. I felt so betrayed and angry. I woke her up and asked her about it and she started crying and begging me.

I left home angrily and jilted. I was so devastated that I smoked a lot of weed that day and drank so much beer. I called my mom explained to her and later told her mom too. The next day her mom called me that she wanted to poison herself because of what she did. I sent her boss a message on WhatsApp and that one didn't even answer me because he knew what he did with my ex wife.

It's been months now since this happened and her mom calls me almost everyday begging me to forgive and forget but how do I forget, it's not easy for me because I can be having sex with her and be seeing her boss face.

I blocked her on Facebook and whatsapp but didn't block her calls or text message because of my baby when I need to send upkeep money. She calls me but I don't pick up. I know that I can't be with her anymore but she has the wedding certificate we got at the court wedding. I told her to give the photocopy of the certificate to my mom but she wouldn't do it.

Guys the reason why I wrote this is who has an idea on how to go about a divorce without the certificate because someone told me the certificate is important for the divorce. I don't know anything about it and my uncle even said the divorce will cost me a lot of money about 650k. I don't know it that's true too. Lol.

Please guys help out here. I have the proof of the chat and the audio conversation of the sex escapade with her boss so that will help in the court. My lovely daughter is 2 years now. How do I even collect my daughter from her. I have left all my property's for her because of my daughter and am starting my life afresh. Will the court be able to grant me my daughters custody although am not ready to train her myself but I have my mom who can do that for me.

In addition to all of this guy's if your girl or woman passwords her phone and doesn't show you her password be very careful she might be cheating because not only did I find out she had sex with her boss I also found out she was also on some random social media nonsense talking to some random guys and all that and that she also bought a land without telling me for 3 years we were together.

Thanks for learning from my story and God bless you guys.

I weep for the OP

chiomzy86:
What she did was bad,very bad..but please find a place in your heart to forgive her,. If the table was turned around ,she will still forgive you..infact,it takes maturity and a man enough to forgive,as everyone is shouting leave her,dump her,.u will attract favour from God if you forgive,time heals,.with time you will let go..

what favors will he attracts?
May this happens to ur brothers so they can attract that favor.

B!tch

chiomzy86:
What she did was bad,very bad..but please find a place in your heart to forgive her,. If the table was turned around ,she will still forgive you..infact,it takes maturity and a man enough to forgive,as everyone is shouting leave her,dump her,.u will attract favour from God if you forgive,time heals,.with time you will let go..

u said when d table turns d woman will forgive. She will only forgive if the man has a fat pocket.


what favors will he attracts to accept a prostitue?

May this happens to ur brothers so they can attract that favor.

B!tch

mhizace:
what ur wife did was really unfair , but i won't advise u to go on divorce cos it will really affect ur baby dat u hv wit her, if u can,gv her another chance maybe she wil change,as for me,my guy have been managing his life since i met him i hv neva cheated on him nd i wilvneva

my dear my story one day will be published on nairaland just that i haven't had time to draft it out.. its a long long episode..... once your partner(either marriage or fiancee) cheats on u, just forgive him/her and move on quietly.. to be truthful, if its a woman that cheats and she is begging and u heed to her plea, trust me that man is long gone

kimbraa:
Ok, 80% of cheating wives don't love their husbands while 80% of cheating men love their wives.

Clap for yourself!

men cheat with their emotions still intact and never go on for long in that game if they do like their wives, but when women cheat they go all in forgetting that the other party just want to chop and then bang they end up loosing from both sides claiming it is the devil

note: i used the word like not love because when u love its hard thinking to cheat.

Proudgorgeousga:
yes it's all about money and security. men are providers women should submit. when a man loses what makes alpha male then he is useless.

lol so bad and hard times wont come right... so when the man gets it all he becomes useful then
feminist spotted

tartarus:
You're the only mature guy on this thread. Boys talking nonsense! One of em was even born 1993. They just see this thread as an avenue to bash women cos one girl in school rejected their advances

@angelboy01, if you want a divorce go ahead with it but you dare not take a child from the mother! Your kid is just 2 for crying out loud. You want to give your child to your mom when the biological mother is still alive?! It can't happen and the court won't grant such yeye request!. Being a cheat doesn't make her a bad mother. As long as she has never harmed the child in any way, you can't take the child from her! The court won't side you! Stop it!

i will ask u a simple question that if u were in that position. how will you look at her, when u recall what happened, how will u feel. Let me tell u something trust is easy to be broken but to built back takes longer time and may never happen. are u hoping for a situation one of them commits murder then u can say he should go back to her.

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
Theres no perfect marriage. Marriage is no bed of roses, you people should know that please.

until a murder case is reported

yabas:
angelboy01 forgive and forget. You will be surprise to find that the new woman may not also be perfect. Think of your daughter who will end up having a part time or absentee father. It is good that you made a stand, she will always think twice in future, if you guys get together. Be patient.

until a murder case is reported

Rozaytee:
Oga...kindly forgive ur wife...men do worse..dey cheat daily and women easily forgive dem...so forgive her...

irrespective of the gender or partner that carried out the cheating. All i have to say is for someone to carry out an act knowing consciously that the other party will be hurt and never cheated on her and still cheated on him.. that person dosent have any form of conscience or love towards the other party because when found out, the innocent party will be hurt

my question to u is will u always want to remind yourself of that person when seeing that person, will you want to risk it all for that person, whats the use of staying in the marriage or that relationship.

there is no 100% saint in a relationship, but if one dosen't remember about the good old times and memories and sleeps around and carries such act,that person is heartless and has no feelings for u, only likes u and wants security by being with u. this story will have been different if he contacted HIV or any deadly STD from her. na sorry all of us go dey talk

freecocoa:
Its not my place to tell you how to go about it, don't just come here calling yourself a man, if you can't get your wife's password without beating her, its that simple.

lol the day i fear women when i caught my ex and she said its your CHOICE i knew your password, i didn't force it on u, i am an adult and i don't want to let u know mine..

then i realised that i have been sleeping on okada.

4FACEADELEKE:
Thats why i am entitled to mine

I never implied otherwise.

Bjrokenhear003:
until a murder case is reported

Tor. Thats why we date.

Bjrokenhear003:
lol the day i fear women when i caught my ex and she said its your CHOICE i knew your password, i didn't force it on u, i am an adult and i don't want to let u know mine..

then i realised that i have been sleeping on okada.

Just imagine my brother.

I don't even know how anyone won't see that as a big problem.

Bjrokenhear003:
lol so bad and hard times wont come right... so when the man gets it all he becomes useful then
feminist spotted

I'm not a feminist. feminists believe in equality of the sexes. and that head of the home is not defined by penis. they also don't believe in submission. they believe a couple should provide together and share household duties.

Me as a patriarchy princess believe that a man is the head and provider and a woman should submit. So a woman that refuses to submit is useless like wise a man that can't provide is useless.

Bjrokenhear003:
lol so bad and hard times wont come right... so when the man gets it all he becomes useful then
feminist spotted

define feminist and it's correlation with the comment you quoted.