₦airaland Forum

bigpicture001:
Mr op, u can't run down here to say yr price nd just bolt away nd dnt read or reply wot we conclude. for me,i am a realist,.. after reading off ur wife's price nd reading urs. yes u cn be excused for takin ur part of d money for parents medicals... which I would also hv done.. in order to save a life,yes,i would b mad with her for not including my name on d property....cuz dts in itself doesn't show love nd sacrifice.... but if it were me, nd wen d problem started nd starts to degenerate.. nd sh is fyting go kip d marage intact..nd in d process,compromised to change the name to both of us, I will gladly accept that nd we move on.. lemme tell u,dt lady us educated nd not some fool in some village,women are not a doll Bby like men use to think. sh has been a supportive wife all diz while. u ate ur cake with using ur money for ur problems, but sh still want to mk u hv d cake bak by share the property ownership. u tink u will see a better woman compared to her in terms of finance management?.. ota go nd try,but b4 u do dt kindly divorce her to let other gud men access to her. ur a very greedy man. a self centered man nd a gold diggger in disguise....i dnt see a single tin sh has done wrong..sh apologies, uts not enough, sh compromised, it's not enough,sh prudently managed resources, it's not enough, sh doesn't cheat,its not enough.....plz I beg u,go nd luk for dt perfect gal,lets see how better sh would be....... ...a lot of fools will mistakenly throw the Bby away along with the bath water.....

which good men
person did not ask about house documents for 14 years and you think she will find better man? person kept his father alive to receive this humiliation and you're talking rubbish
abeg may she go see the difference
she go hia wen
when she jam man wen no go gree her comot for house she will know she lost a good man due to her unbridled tongue

Daeylar:
You have finished work,
Tuale.!!!!
He knew, in fact, to this moment, he knows he is wrong, that's why he started with some bullshit, it is the wife's responsibility to keep the home.

I wish Aunty heseesall, like I said earlier, can consider divorce, but Nigerians no dey like to hear divorce.

I wish them the best, but let her never change the name on the document to the Man's name, or even do joint ownership, the name should remain in her name Alone. ALONE.

"Get out of my house" because of ordinary argument,
As if that one is not annoying enough,
It's a house that he knows his wife built alone while he gave her a very tiny amount just to contribute. I mean what can be left after building his parents house and taking care of his father's illness? Yet he still had the boldness to tell her to get out of his house. HIS HOUSE KWA!!!
Mtcheeeeewwwwwwww

It's no 12, 14 and 15 that pained me pass. The man has no issues with treating his children like trash, When it is convenient for him, he abandons his children. When it is convenient, he wants to use then as a bargaining chip, not once did he care about their welfare and how they would feel in relation to all this, but some how he still feels he is right. mtchew. While the woman has refused to leave the man because she doesn't know how to explain to the kids that marriage ended because of property, this wicked man just doesn't care.


I'm praying Heseesall doesn't ever change the name of the document, it should remain in her name alone, and finds someone new who will treat her with respect.

may she go marry the house na
only gigolos will deceive her at her age

A different story from your wife's part

Daeylar:
When such nairalanders supported domestic violence and assault against a woman, called the victim a bitch and a very useless mod brought such a thread to FP

This one is a small thing for them to support na.

Everything is men vs women to their immature selves.
They will rather die than support a woman over a man, even if the woman is 100% right. Na their way.


Useless misogynistic men running around nairaland.

why will any man support a woman with no home training

Chikicaka:
Lol, never knew Nl has become a magistrate court! 75% of ppl here are not married, in a bad marriage or not even in a serious relationship at all,

men have no womb but treat infertilit
think before you talk

wonder why on earth two grown adults would need validation of their actions from us. soon LIB would carry it, oversabi Nigerians would fish out your real details and you guys would be one minute celebs.

PS- The both parties basically said the same thing, just twisted a little words to favour one another, Oga n Madam get together, spill out your inner heart, apologize, cry, hug, kiss then have mind blowing s*x, God bless your marriage, hopefully after all this you still have one

men ba

Robynwelo1:
You are blind and hungry. Did you not read where they both said it was the woman that built the house with her money? So she should put it in his name? What insolent right does he have to dare utter that statement 'leave my house'?

She bought the land but they built the house together. It was after the house was completed, he moved to complete his family's house with his balance. Y'all can support the woman, but don't twist what both of them said just to drive home your point. She owns the land, but they both own the building on it.

HEseesall:
The property only is in my name but we built it together

ExtraExtra:
back here she got the property and started building, when i came back the remaining money with me was used to complete it, what was left was used for my parents house. Being a trust worthy person i feel she is, i didnt bother to check documents cos i felt she would do the right thing by putting both our names which she kept in a bank. .

Perhaps you're the blind person here to have missed these posts by both of them

LydayBobo:
Your wife response to most comments on her earlier mail shows she still loves you. Please let love settle all. Take charge of your family Bro. Go home

she doesn't love him
she just doesn't want society to deal with her

maasoap:
If ever you are lucky to marry a good woman, dumping you will be the last thing on your worry lists. I'm a lucky man. Relationship is about forgiving but some spouses always finding it difficult to forgive and forget. When I finally learnt this trick, my life became simple and enjoyable. You wouldn't understand.

no she's the lucky one my friend
she's hot and lucky to get cold man.

maasoap:
Where did she insult his parents in his write up because I didn't see that part? Besides, children sometimes insult their own parents too, I've seen it. So, if your spouse insults your parents, you will divorce her? That's not the solution.

Pls read his write up again slowly

maasoap:
Where did she insult his parents in his write up because I didn't see that part? Besides, children sometimes insult their own parents too, I've seen it. So, if your spouse insults your parents, you will divorce her? That's not the solution.

fourth paragraph or search for TOXIC

egojeny1:
Thank u. I so much like this ur comment.
Men are always fond of telling their wives to pack out of the house over a little disagreement
.

why do women disagree up to pack out level
why did they marry to disagree

How would u tell ur wife to leave the house and u call it a joke? This is why 'we' the wives now struggle hard to own properties.
U used ur own share to take care of ur ailing father and she used hers to build a house and u are annoyed that she didn't put u as a co-owner. What if she lavished hers or used it to help somebody in her family, would u have had that property today?
I soo much like ur wife because she's a very intelligent lady. U shld thank ur stars for having a wife that makes good use of her brain. You told her to leave the house bc u thought the house was in your name only. It serves u right. Next time u won't dare tell her such thing.

who's begging now?

appsdope:
Lol! I'm more concerned with his ego. He thinks divorce is a child's play.

big deal
ppl divorce everyday
he survived when he was single
hell survive again

The woman knows what kind of person he is which is why she did what she did.

and yet she married him
unintelligent woman

He thinks this is 1940 like u said. He can't win this. If I were him, we'll be looking for an apartment by now although my kind of person won't say get out.

he has moved out
she is begging

I'll leave and spend days out. When we trash things out, we'll need to move out of that house. Ego doesn't add anything to the family. It will only seperate us further. The girls family is well to do and I get the point he's trying to make but this has gone too far. I won't even write anything online if I were him. I'll just stay on my lane.

pocohantas:
It is funny how once the table turns, you guys come crying about ego. Which human being doesn't have ego? Which human doesn't want respect? Or you men convinced yourselves you want and deserve it more? Everyday there is a story of a woman who gets thrown out of her home. I don't see you typing epistle on how her ego got bruised. I don't see you come to tell us how women shouldn't collect money from men. You and your cohorts never talk about how made men treat their dependent wives.

Everyone should treat their spouses as they will love to be treated. Women learnt from the experiences of their mothers.

Yes,a wise woman builds her home.
What does a wise man do?

the women yes JUST thrown out abi
they didn't cheat
they didn't run their mouth
they were just thrown out abi

GrammarCheck:
The yeye op is not thanking his stars that he didn't marry a slay queen that would have wrecked him by now.

He needs to go and apologize to his wife. Nigerian men with their entitlement mentality

if he married slay queen he will not give her autonomy over money
women with entitlement mentality to be running their mouth thinking nothing will happen.

GrammarCheck:
That is why you are still unmarried

so marrying woman that is disrespecting you and teaching your daughter to disrespect her husband. that's your definition of marriage?wow
just so you too can be called married? desperate
low self esteem

funmisticqueen:
for her to be suspicious of you, you must have given her reason to, and techinically you have no right to ask for the house in your name only cos that shows that you never viewed her as an equal. You are just fishing for public sympathy. no matter how she angered you, if you viewed her as an equal, you would never have asked her to leave. i would advise that you buy the house from her since you want it to be in your name, cos the way you are going about it is through emotional balckmail and it is wrong.

men and women are not have never will never be equal

Icecreamy:
I don't see any difference between the story your wife told and your own story. You asked her to move out of the house, now you said you don't mean it, how was she supposed to know that, so you want to toss her back and forth any time you are angry. Since you never meant it, why did you say it, what if she tells you she didn't mean what she said too.
And also, I think Mr and Mrs can not be used for land, it's just one persons name that can be used (people working with town planning and allocations can educate us more).
I believe you are just bruised because you can't threaten her with packing out, instead she is the one doing that to you.
LESSON: Don't do to others what you don't want to be done to you.
May God save your marriage but please you both should do away with Pride.

why she always making him angry

azraeljaheel:
All I see is EGO in both parties... And fire can't quench fire




Advice : if one of ya can't be water... Make una just start to dey look for another soul to marry #fact Kos shit can't work out even if she moves to your so called new apartay

Gbam

battleaxe:
Irrespective of what has happened, a responsible married man and father should not be telling his wife to get out of the house.

so what is the punishment for irresponsible woman

sugah:
ExtraExtra and HEseesall
The foundation of your marriage is flawed. In marriage there's no I, me, my share, his share. You went into a biz and shared the profits into his and hers instead of ours. Assuming you had the profits as "ours" then taking part of it to take care of an ailing father and using the rest to build your house wouldn't leave doubts as to whose name should be on the house documents.
ExtraExtra your faults are plenty.
1. You have inferiority complex. Your wife, in her write up, did not mention she was from a more financially stable background but you brought it up even though it added no value to the issue at hand. Deal with your complex problems else it would destroy your home.
2. You are not nuclear family oriented. Yes you are the first son so you still have a responsibility for your extended family but you don't do that at the detriment of your nuclear family. Your wife bought and built a property to completion and you are only just finding out the details of the documentation? How unconcerned were you exactly I understand putting health first in cases of emergency but afterwards you went ahead to complete your father's house before adding the change to your own house? You should be grateful to your wife for covering up your weaknesses. At least she's more family oriented and built a home for you and your kids.
3. If you are having a heated argument with your wife, the reasonable thing to do is to excuse yourself from the situation. Go out to a bar, have a drink or two to cool off then return home to a calmer atmosphere and discuss the issue. How on Earth do you ask a woman to leave the house during an argument (forget that your joking b.s, I'm not buying it)? Where do you expect her to go to cool off?
4. This one goes back to your not being nuclear family oriented.... you have already gone ahead to report the situation in your home to your extended family and even your wife didn't do it. Now you are making unreasonable ultimatums just so you can satisfy your bruised ego or at least prove to your extended family members that you wear the trousers in your home.
5. You are not willing to keep your home and you are taking for granted the fact that your wife is willing to do anything to keep the home. You have applied for a transfer to another state because of this issue? Did you consider what the move would do to your children? Have you even thought about anyone else except yourself in this issue?

HEseesall,
Learn not to make assumptions (you assumed he would know the property was in your name)... communicate! Communicate!! Communicate!!!
Agree to put the property in his name and if he doesn't change his stance about it, that's having both your names on it, then consider your stance in the marriage. Unfortunately you married a man who doesn't understand what marriage is about or the relationship between marriage and Christ so you either chose to carry your cross and make it work or seek professional help.

All the best.

so his parents not his family? or what is all this nonsense you're typing

MIKOLOWISKA:
so marrying woman that is disrespecting you and teaching your daughter to disrespect her husband. that's your definition of marriage?wow
just so you too can be called married? desperate
low self esteem

Abeg carry your cave man mentality and shove it up where the sun doesn't shine.

MizMyColi:
Akuko. Na so.
Ngozi Okonjo is a time bomb abi?
Dora Akunyili (RIP) was also one.
Oga, there's no justifying his decision ooo.
If you want to continue in your line of thought, good luck to you.
Remember, you are what you think. You are a sum total of your thought pattern.

when they married nko were they not provided for by their husbands mumu thinking

Elfmannisback:
They know it hurts when told to leave the house but they will be piling up insults and abuses on u regularly and expect u not to hit them or insult them back. I don't understand these people!

na d fish brain na
den no get sense

kmcutez:
When they tell women to marry from their class, they refuse to listen. Now the wife has married a poor man with poverty mentality. Imagine dragging property with your wife and you are not ashamed. Tufia!!!.

I dey vex gan. Your wife is too nice in wanting to add your name to the said property. If I was your wife, you go hear am. Nonsense and ingredient. As if it's not your children that will inherit the so called property.

Assuming you die today, your same family with poverty mentality will start dragging the property with your wife.

when nobody wan marry her nko and shame de catch am

JoannaSedley:
There is nothing the man can do again. He left the house, his wife and kids. He practically ran when he faced the truth. He is a wimp, a pu.ssy and a sissy. He blew the trumpet to all their extended family members, telling them how he wasn't capable of raising a roof over his family's head. He insulted his wife in front of his cousin and got the shocker of his life when he had his bruised balls handed over to him by his wife.

To me, they are just business partners and nothing more.
Was there any other things in the house that was bought with your wife's name apart form the property?
Whining excuse of a man!! Imagine me blackmailing my husband to put my name alone on a property he bought. What sort of fraud and inferiority complex is that?

Woman wrapper

guess who's running from pillar to post now?

ikechizoba:
Oga
you are being unfair to your wife,she was even the one that brought up the business idea that yielded a lot of profit for you people.What is money without a business idea to make the money useful,and she even contributed half of the capital, you think its every woman that will agree to that,but she cared so much about your future and to make it happen,she give you a full support,because she cares.

You are a selfish man sir,you and your family benefited more than enough, from that investment, so because she is from a well to do family,that makes it OK to shift every financial help to your family alone.God will judge you because that woman did nothing to you,you have allowed your selfishness, arrogance and pride to take over your reasoning.


Well done sir

so because she had biz idea she is allowed to insult his parents abi?
I see how your mind works

ikechizoba:
Don't mind them,they think its the men's world all the time,imagine the nonsense.

who's begging now. it is a man's world.

pacesetting:
Whoever you are, you have completely nailed this issue. You just wrote virtually everything I had in my mind. I've read the two sides of the story. And as you rightly pointed out, OP wants to destroy his family. Unknowing to him, he's just being selfish and wicked to his children.

He should be thanking God he has a wife who could think up a smart business idea for both of them to invest together. He is here claiming property he doesn't even have any right to own. As a man, I find it hard to believe that some men in this current generation are still living like our fore fathers. No wonder most rich people would rather marry people in their class than marry people who will never get rid of their inferiority complex.

how many rich ppl have happy marriage. who wan marry woman wen no fit control her mouth

monalicious:
This got me. Lol. Atleast if she had, there wouldn't be a bone of contention now. Lol. The only blame I can place on d woman is putting her name as d sole owner from the beginning. But who knows if God was trying to protect her. Over a misunderstanding he had with his wife,

over misunderstanding his WIFE HAD WITH HIM

STOP LYING

he already threatened to send her packing, even if he said he didn't mean it. That would have been the beginning of many "pack out of my house" saga, before he finally sends her out truly. The man should also accept his fault, throw away his ego, and take back his wife. If he is so pained, then they can sell d house like someone suggested n get a new place.

GrammarCheck:
Abeg carry your cave man mentality and shove it up where the sun doesn't shine.

why did she marry cave man. when the sheet hits the fan, is it your type that will step up to protect his own.beach asss Nigga

MIKOLOWISKA:
so his parents not his family? or what is all this nonsense you're typing

Read what you have written and ask yourself who's typing nonsense.

eyinjuege:
Some people are hammering on the agreement between them.
What kind of agreement is that?
For them to have split the money, it's obvious the wife wanted her own share for her own use, and rightly so.
Otherwise she wouldn't have even been concerned about any of the money at all.
For him to slyly make her agree to use her own share of the money (which we all agree was her own share) for their family, and not spend it on her own parents, go on a luxurious vacation, or buy a new car shows that he wants to eat his cake and have it.
For her not to have been in support of that possibly coerced "agreement" is obvious in the next step she took, by not including his name in the property. She never felt it was right, and obviously didn't agree to it.
Why should it be a problem for him to live in his wife's house, when she hasn't ever told him to leave it or ridiculed him for that? He was the one who tried to ridicule her instead.
I'm really not getting why it should be a problem for her to spend her own share of the money on a property with her name on it. It's her hard work for goodness sake.
Why bother to claim we shared the money, and still expect your name on what she decides to do with it? That was an unfair position to put anyone in, by making such an agreement.
Where is the place of honor and integrity in all these?

it is where the woman threw it when running her mouth.