₦airaland Forum

luxy44:
Is she still your wife? This one na our wives na. What exactly are you fighting for?

Oakvine:
In my opinion, I think the marriage has already deteriorated as its beyond redemption at this point. From your story, your wife's love is apparently with the guy and not you. Question is, do you envisage a restoration of your marriage in any way? If no, please initiate divorce proceedings. If yes, then get professional counseling because if you continue at this rate, I'm afraid, violence may be inevitable.

Do not get confrontational with the guy or your wife as they both haven't committed any criminal offense and certainly the law wouldn't spare you should there be any injuries or fatalities.

For the sake of your child and your own future, handle it civilly.

Wilfredpat22:
SIR, that is we women for you. It is so difficult for us to close our legs especially if we have been sleeping with countless men before marriage.

Her colleague has been enjoying her with you and you are the weaker man here. I will advice you to take a divorce. If my man cheats, I don’t even want to hear forgiveness, I am exiting from the house (that is if it his house)

And sir, it is only the colleague you are aware of, she might have been opening her treasure for the Bank manager, Auditor, Security guard... etc

Please take CHARGE AND DONT BE A SISSY

luxy44:
Is she still your wife? This one na our wives na. What exactly are you fighting for?

tamethem:
For better for worse no reach Adultery oo.

When marriage comes to this Divorce is the best else this guy will spend the rest of his life in Jail or sentenced to death if he should do something grievous to either his wife or the man friend.

Divorce straight

Uchenaija:
Once you start, it's hard to cure immorality, it's like drug.


What do you want: your wife back? Divorce? Ending your wife's or/and her colleagues job? Destroy the lives of two families? Forgiving and managing your wife? Managing life alone with your kid?

After careful thought, state exactly want you want, what will truly make you happy then your want would determine your decisions & outcome.

No one can make the choice for you in glaring facts.

Modified: I remembered your wife was reading this too, so let me send her a message:

Stolen waters are sweet, And food eaten in secret is pleasant but the aftermath is as bitter as wormwood. And your disgrace would never be wiped away.

chiommy123:
so you can't forgive her if she repents

bayulll011:
is it only me that is sensing that most nairaland ladies are silly I mean he shld watch one fictional film someone wrote are u that silly to understand this is real life.
only if u are how cos I really pity any man that will put this one in any house,is this how u wanna trained ur daughters I mean whats the world turning to

Wilfredpat22:
SIR, that is we women for you. It is so difficult for us to close our legs especially if we have been sleeping with countless men before marriage.

Her colleague has been enjoying her with you and you are the weaker man here. I will advice you to take a divorce. If my man cheats, I don’t even want to hear forgiveness, I am exiting from the house (that is if it his house)

And sir, it is only the colleague you are aware of, she might have been opening her treasure for the Bank manager, Auditor, Security guard... etc

Please take CHARGE AND DONT BE A SISSY

Treasuredlove:
who are the "we" women? U and your clique ba?

cruchenutii:
Lol. Youuu, after going thru your playlist. I'm very sure you must be 50years & above because ehn, that playlist is for the Ancestors

mogbojaiye:
me and u kw say e go hard for a promiscuous married woman to repent..... She aren't single

tiredoflife:
U go die like fowl
U catch ur wife dey cheat
U get evidence
She still dey cook u dey chop
U dey Bleep am
Na warn u dey warn am
U must be Yoruba
So I no surprise
I am urohobo
For my culture say u don know and u still dey chop her food and Bleep am
She still dey ur house
Eriwi our juju for don knack u down
By now maggot go don chop u so that the guy can continue

U are a useless man
Forming u love ur wife there till she kills u all in the name of sex and say na self defence

No wonder una dey die like fowl
Keep warning her
Ode

E no go better for u

Uchenaija:
Once you start, it's hard to cure immorality, it's like drug.


What do you want: your wife back? Divorce? Ending your wife's or/and her colleagues job? Destroy the lives of two families? Forgiving and managing your wife? Managing life alone with your kid?

After careful thought, state exactly want you want, what will truly make you happy then your want would determine your decisions & outcome.

No one can make the choice for you in glaring facts.

Modified: I remembered your wife was reading this too, so let me send her a message:

Stolen waters are sweet, And food eaten in secret is pleasant but the aftermath is as bitter as wormwood. And your disgrace would never be wiped away.

mysaviouralive:
Hello Admin pls move this to the front page and I will be in the comment section reading.

Pls I want to take a boldness step and I will not mind where it can lead to. I have to open an account now to post this. My wife is also a guest of nairaland and she will be seeing this post.

It happen that I got married to my wife over Nine yrs ago and we only have a Kid. I was working in a big company then before the new management came in and change the policy of the company and I was laid off. I was idle like 3yrs before I got another job. she is working in one of the biggest bank in Nigeria. Like 5yrs ago I noticed she will be smiling whenever she is chatting with one of her male colleague. I ask what are they normally discussing, but she told me that it was their office issue that they are discussing. I know the guy and his family and the guy has came to my house not more than four times.

It happen one day that I demanded to give her phone to browse because I was having problem with my phone. she gave me the phone around 10:30pm and I noticed she has has cleared all their chat. This make it look suspicious and I asked her immediately that why did you deleted the chat, but she told me it was a mistake. I think over it for sometime because I trust her then, but on the other hand my mind was telling me to find out more. As an IT expert I connected her phone to my system and do some forensic research on the phone, alas what I discovered was bad. My wife and the guy have been having an affair and chatting and sending their nude to themselves. I called her immediately and demanded to explain the pixture but she denial it and was telling me another story that she snap the pixture and to show me how she was Hot so that we can have sex that night.

she said I should show her where I got the nude pixs and before she came back from the office she has wipe all the pixs that I showed her thinking that I cannot recovered it anymore and I asked her why should you do that but was just begging me. I recovered all the pixs back and the chat she believe she has deleted and I have more proof that she has been cheating on me.

So I asked her to tell me the truth what is going on with the guy and her but she was just begging me. But I told him I dont want her to do or have anything with the guy again that if I catch her again she will not like what I will do for her, with the hope that she will change. Recently I noticed she stil chatting with the guy again and I rake on her to stop it but she told me that she was just explaining office issue she has when he (the guy) not around because she is the one that relief him on work.

This week they are still chatting late in the nite cos I always seen the chat, though she will delete it as soon as they chat finish but I always have the chat and also today they have chat alot to the extend that my wife was crying when she expecting good reply from the guy but the guy fail him and I noticed she has intimate with the guy rather than me her husband.

My wife can lie and so Promiscuous. I have called her severally to change but she did not, recently I heard she was talking with one of her online friend from Abuja when the guy told her he will be coming to visit her this coming week, and I expect my wife to tell me but uptill now she has not saying anything on it. This make me not to have much trust in her again because if she tell me something I will still think over it like five times again before I accepted.

So my plan now is to call the wife of her colleague and explain everything to the wife and I also planing of arresting her colleague because I still have the proof and dont mind what can come out of this, because I tired and cant continue like this anymore, ever since I have caught her I did not enjoy my home anylonger and I tried to erase it from my memory but not get it wright.

Pls save me and save my marriage if possible.

Thank you.

Sarang:
She is smart that person you quoted.. way smarter than you can ever be! Pit of hell my foot.. did she send her to cheat on her husband??

Sarang:
She is smart that person you quoted.. way smarter than you can ever be! Pit of hell my foot.. did she send her to cheat on her husband??

dancok:
the lady is saying the truth, you people are calling her, hypocrite, that's how women do.

Elder001:
Who paid the damages?

mankettle:
@ Op.
1. keep the evidence.
2. don't tell the wife.
3. Since you have proof that your wife is committing adultery,, a. if you can tolerate her, don't divorce her if not get a divorce. get a lawyer to advise you.
4. if getting a divorce you can sue the colleague as the named party. if you are lucky, the Judge may award damages to you.
5. on no account must you arrest him as the offence he committed is purely civil and not criminal? except you stay up north.
6. do not allow the wife to loose her job as it will affect your finances.

Grace001:
I feel for your man, this is really a painful situation. But I'm sorry to say this, OP you sound so weak I can tell from your write-up. One thing you should know is that a cheating wife is capable of killing her husband, the more she goes deeper in this promiscuous act the more she get carried away hence she could do anything for her secret-lover.

Why would want to arrest her colleague? So if your wife is cheating with other men, would you arrest all of them? Did you by any chance find out that her(male) colleague forced your wife or harass her into this capricious act? Your cheating wife deliberately accepted to cheat on you with her colleague.

If you really want her to stop cheating, then you need to act like a man. Call her parents/important family members and show them the evidence of their promiscuous daughter after doing that, then give her the final warning the day you catch her again will be the last time she will bear your surname(except if you're not a man enough or she is the breadwinner you will be afraid to do this)

I'm sure her close family will warn her and do the needful, arresting her colleague is a waste of time and shows how weak you are as the man of the house.

yettymuse:
Divorce is not even an option because the devil you know is better than the angel you don't know. You just have to make your marriage work. I hate to hear about cheating causing dissolution in marriages or relationships.

By the way your wife could be flirting and not cheating completely... Are you still doing those things you were doing during courtship? 9 years is a long time and trust me you must have begin to adopt the mama and papa style. When was the last time you both went for a dinner, movies, walk, vacation...?
Do you even still remember to call your wife sweet names?? Some foot massage after a hectic day?... Raunchy whatsapp message whilst at work?, breakfast in bed.... Little gift, lingeries, etc..

How's is your sex life? Do you communicate your fantasies and cravings? , when was she last time she got an orgasmic gift and said "THANK YOU"! Hunku you're married so no limits, no boundaries... Set everything on fire!

Maybe your marriage needs a rejuvenation, we sef dey get bored sometimes..

Reignite 'em romantic spark and set the atmosphere on fire. Instead of snooping, change your mode of dressing, stay trim and fit, wear a clean hair cut and smear some cologne mix n match.

If all this doesn't work, pray and watch WAR ROOM, please watch this movie and your marriage would be back to how it was.

Wiseonetemmy:
You make it sound like its must be the guys fault that his wife is seeing another man. Some women are promiscuous no matter the amount of love or money you give. Imagine if it was a woman that came for advise, would you tell her that maybe she has become fat, or maybe she now wears wrapper around the house, or maybe she no longer cooks the delicious soup she cooks before marriage.

PrinceKeny:
If u reside within irecary (Isolo) & ur wife branch is around ejigbo (NNPC) ...Lagos , Sorry bro u gat no wife but a bitch , prostitute as in a public toilet.

mysaviouralive:
Hello Admin pls move this to the front page and I will be in the comment section reading.

Pls I want to take a boldness step and I will not mind where it can lead to. I have to open an account now to post this. My wife is also a guest of nairaland and she will be seeing this post.

It happen that I got married to my wife over Nine yrs ago and we only have a Kid. I was working in a big company then before the new management came in and change the policy of the company and I was laid off. I was idle like 3yrs before I got another job. she is working in one of the biggest bank in Nigeria. Like 5yrs ago I noticed she will be smiling whenever she is chatting with one of her male colleague. I ask what are they normally discussing, but she told me that it was their office issue that they are discussing. I know the guy and his family and the guy has came to my house not more than four times.

It happen one day that I demanded to give her phone to browse because I was having problem with my phone. she gave me the phone around 10:30pm and I noticed she has has cleared all their chat. This make it look suspicious and I asked her immediately that why did you deleted the chat, but she told me it was a mistake. I think over it for sometime because I trust her then, but on the other hand my mind was telling me to find out more. As an IT expert I connected her phone to my system and do some forensic research on the phone, alas what I discovered was bad. My wife and the guy have been having an affair and chatting and sending their nude to themselves. I called her immediately and demanded to explain the pixture but she denial it and was telling me another story that she snap the pixture and to show me how she was Hot so that we can have sex that night.

she said I should show her where I got the nude pixs and before she came back from the office she has wipe all the pixs that I showed her thinking that I cannot recovered it anymore and I asked her why should you do that but was just begging me. I recovered all the pixs back and the chat she believe she has deleted and I have more proof that she has been cheating on me.

So I asked her to tell me the truth what is going on with the guy and her but she was just begging me. But I told him I dont want her to do or have anything with the guy again that if I catch her again she will not like what I will do for her, with the hope that she will change. Recently I noticed she stil chatting with the guy again and I rake on her to stop it but she told me that she was just explaining office issue she has when he (the guy) not around because she is the one that relief him on work.

This week they are still chatting late in the nite cos I always seen the chat, though she will delete it as soon as they chat finish but I always have the chat and also today they have chat alot to the extend that my wife was crying when she expecting good reply from the guy but the guy fail him and I noticed she has intimate with the guy rather than me her husband.

My wife can lie and so Promiscuous. I have called her severally to change but she did not, recently I heard she was talking with one of her online friend from Abuja when the guy told her he will be coming to visit her this coming week, and I expect my wife to tell me but uptill now she has not saying anything on it. This make me not to have much trust in her again because if she tell me something I will still think over it like five times again before I accepted.

So my plan now is to call the wife of her colleague and explain everything to the wife and I also planing of arresting her colleague because I still have the proof and dont mind what can come out of this, because I tired and cant continue like this anymore, ever since I have caught her I did not enjoy my home anylonger and I tried to erase it from my memory but not get it wright.

Pls save me and save my marriage if possible.

Thank you.

teens:
Have you ever married before?

GreenCap:
LAPD, it's Ire Akari not irecary. NNPC depot Ikotun Road.

when you show a bitch (female dog) puppy-love, she barks at every intruder.

God asked prophet Hosea to go back to his prostitute wife Gomer who later had a son for him.

a public toilet (or mobile cistern) can be locked and her key assigned to only one user.

IT Expert, secure your network host (woman), hide her behind a firewall protection (prayer)
This is wisdom from our ancestors.
and "destination unreachable" shall be the echo reply that unethical hacker (playboy) can see on his remote device.

divorce is a sign of weakness. strength is a show of forgiveness