Suzzyyy:
Hello Nairalanders! Plz help! I hv been scared and confused abt a risk I want to tk so I decided to share for advice.

Im 29 and I hv a boyfriend who is 33. We hv been happily dating for close to 3 years now, he once helped me financially in a good way with 100k when I had problem with my little business, then he was doing pretty fine with his business, I sell plastics and hez into cloth business. But somtin happened last 2 months, he had terrible problems with his business and lost almost everything including his shop and in a bid to salvage his situation he ended up owing many pple, when all these started he didn't tell me, thou hez a kind of person that likes handling his problem alone without disturbing or telling me which I don't like bcus it somehow makes me feel less important and useful to him, I got to know when he changed, his attitude, moods and everything changed, hez always disturbed, thinking and always visiting pple, he payed less concern and attention to me, don't even call and when I call, he will be in a haste to end it, I became confused, so I had to asked what was going on, he said nothing, I got upset and insisted he must tell me, he then opened up, I felt so bad and almost cried, since then I have been trying to maintain his upkeep and sometimes give him money which hez not comfortable with.

The problem now Is that im scared, he asked for a huge amount of money from me which is 700k, he wants to start all over again in his cloth business and also clear some debt, and I can only boast of 820k home and abroad as a business woman, i just feel he saw my account balance before asking for this, Im scared to loose the money and him too. I love this guy but im so scared of doing this, he helped me when I needed money, but this sacrifice is bigger than me, he showed and detailed everything he will be doing with the money, Im just confused to gamble with my life savings, I know I might sound ungrateful what if the business or our relationship crumble? Won't I be stranded and doomed? My business is not that strong and we all know how most of sacrifices like this ended for people. Is this kind of risk worth doing for a boyfriend

Plz advice me on what to do, plz.

OP can you read me? don't borrow him that money, I repeat, don't borrow him 700k. if he knows you are capable of being if help, you should have be the first to know of his problem. you of 29yrs have dated a guy of 33yrs for 3years yet you are not both open to each other in issue of this nature, which type of marriage are you hoping to get from such relationship? in fact if after 3yrs in a relationship, a period within which both of you have source of livelihood, you still have to do series of permutations from his not being lively to not picking your calls before you finally get to know that he is having financial challenge of this magnitude, I have the feeling that one of you is not interested in getting married to the other.

Suzzyyy:
Hello Nairalanders! Plz help! I hv been scared and confused abt a risk I want to tk so I decided to share for advice.

Im 29 and I hv a boyfriend who is 33. We hv been happily dating for close to 3 years now, he once helped me financially in a good way with 100k when I had problem with my little business, then he was doing pretty fine with his business, I sell plastics and hez into cloth business. But somtin happened last 2 months, he had terrible problems with his business and lost almost everything including his shop and in a bid to salvage his situation he ended up owing many pple, when all these started he didn't tell me, thou hez a kind of person that likes handling his problem alone without disturbing or telling me which I don't like bcus it somehow makes me feel less important and useful to him, I got to know when he changed, his attitude, moods and everything changed, hez always disturbed, thinking and always visiting pple, he payed less concern and attention to me, don't even call and when I call, he will be in a haste to end it, I became confused, so I had to asked what was going on, he said nothing, I got upset and insisted he must tell me, he then opened up, I felt so bad and almost cried, since then I have been trying to maintain his upkeep and sometimes give him money which hez not comfortable with.

The problem now Is that im scared, he asked for a huge amount of money from me which is 700k, he wants to start all over again in his cloth business and also clear some debt, and I can only boast of 820k home and abroad as a business woman, i just feel he saw my account balance before asking for this, Im scared to loose the money and him too. I love this guy but im so scared of doing this, he helped me when I needed money, but this sacrifice is bigger than me, he showed and detailed everything he will be doing with the money, Im just confused to gamble with my life savings, I know I might sound ungrateful what if the business or our relationship crumble? Won't I be stranded and doomed? My business is not that strong and we all know how most of sacrifices like this ended for people. Is this kind of risk worth doing for a boyfriend

Plz advice me on what to do, plz.

Please don't lend him any above amount 300k. He is in no way committed to you at the level you two are playing.

Don't come here to call out on men when he elopes with your money.be wise

fancy4eve:
no man, I repeat no man will risk 100k out of his 120k, so tink b4 u talk.

Hv seen so many cases dat ended in big fight, so dear, to avoid long story, u Gv wat u cn let go.

haba!!!! because no man has done it for u, is not enough reason to conclude girl...the world is large...

Nigerian woman and selfishness...even if he needed that money to save his life for surgery you will rather watch him die. I can't laugh ooo. You people are too selfish. Once you offer Toto that's all you think it important . Na waoll

Rubbiish:

haba!!!! because no man has done it for u, is not enough reason to conclude girl...the world is large...

just bcus it's a guy u want her to run dry abi. U men re wicked! wat if she's ur sister, will u advice her to Gv such huge amount to her BF in d name of luv, my dear Bleep luv nd do d ryt tin.

donstan18:
When it comes to their turn to help a man financially, they'll remember [What if, What about, Sacrifice, Risky, Should I, Shall I, Shall we, Shall should, Shall us, Shall him, Shall she, Shall shim]

He helped your business stood its ground without asking if the risk was worth doing for a girlfriend, and here you are, calculating and warring the gravity of his sacrifice and the one he's asking of you. Sacrifice is sacrifice. Do it if you want, and if you don't, then get the hell out of his life.

Sex must not be the only thing you offer a man without seeking advice.

I love this reply!

Just the bitter truth. I have always had the opinion of relationship being a two way thing. Covering each others needs, not this sex for money bullshit we have nowadays

fancy4eve:
just bcus it's a guy u want her to run dry abi. U men re wicked! wat if she's ur sister, will u advice her to Gv such huge amount to her BF in d name of luv, my dear Bleep luv nd do d ryt tin.

Lolx...i don't want her to run dry...

Rubbiish:

Lolx...i don't want her to run dry...

Don't do to odas wat u will not lyk pple to do unto u, so advice her rightly

ZoeyJ:
I made that mistake of lending out 43k and never got it back.
I'm still pained

You must be very stingy

Saff:
Please do NOT borrow him anything. But preferably nothing. Goodluck

You are just wicked

Rubbiish:

Wasn't expecting anything less from u...Thought your man hating had led astray by now...Surprised u still here...

Your name sums up what is in your brain and the stinking thing rushing out of your mouth. Lmao.

If u can't risk helping ur partner be it husband, fiance or boyfriend; u don't worth being someone's wife tomorrow. I pray u remain single for life..

donstan18:
When it comes to their turn to help a man financially, they'll remember [What if, What about, Sacrifice, Risky, Should I, Shall I, Shall we, Shall should, Shall us, Shall him, Shall she, Shall shim]

He helped your business stood its ground without asking if the risk was worth doing for a girlfriend, and here you are, calculating and warring the gravity of his sacrifice and the one he's asking of you. Sacrifice is sacrifice. Do it if you want, and if you don't, then get the hell out of his life.

Sex must not be the only thing you offer a man without seeking advice.

Clapping for this dude.....100 gbosa for u..

I think a guy you have dated for 3 years you should know his personality and integrity level better by now.
The problem with most of our ladies is insecurity,you are thinking if this guy rise again won't he drop you for another lady and your investment in him will go down the drain.

If you truly love this guy and you can attest his love for you is real go ahead and assist him.

You may decide to break the money into tranches so that your business will not be affected

Suzzyyy:
Hello Nairalanders! Plz help! I hv been scared and confused abt a risk I want to tk so I decided to share for advice.

Im 29 and I hv a boyfriend who is 33. We hv been happily dating for close to 3 years now, he once helped me financially in a good way with 100k when I had problem with my little business, then he was doing pretty fine with his business, I sell plastics and hez into cloth business. But somtin happened last 2 months, he had terrible problems with his business and lost almost everything including his shop and in a bid to salvage his situation he ended up owing many pple, when all these started he didn't tell me, thou hez a kind of person that likes handling his problem alone without disturbing or telling me which I don't like bcus it somehow makes me feel less important and useful to him, I got to know when he changed, his attitude, moods and everything changed, hez always disturbed, thinking and always visiting pple, he payed less concern and attention to me, don't even call and when I call, he will be in a haste to end it, I became confused, so I had to asked what was going on, he said nothing, I got upset and insisted he must tell me, he then opened up, I felt so bad and almost cried, since then I have been trying to maintain his upkeep and sometimes give him money which hez not comfortable with.

The problem now Is that im scared, he asked for a huge amount of money from me which is 700k, he wants to start all over again in his cloth business and also clear some debt, and I can only boast of 820k home and abroad as a business woman, i just feel he saw my account balance before asking for this, Im scared to loose the money and him too. I love this guy but im so scared of doing this, he helped me when I needed money, but this sacrifice is bigger than me, he showed and detailed everything he will be doing with the money, Im just confused to gamble with my life savings, I know I might sound ungrateful what if the business or our relationship crumble? Won't I be stranded and doomed? My business is not that strong and we all know how most of sacrifices like this ended for people. Is this kind of risk worth doing for a boyfriend

Plz advice me on what to do, plz.

If you can afford to give him the money, please do.

But before anything, involve a lawyer. Everything must be properly documented.

Also, it would be advisable to incorporate a company. Both of you will be directors and he shareholders.

Tomorrow when the business grows, you will have a say in it.

There is nothing wrong with providing financing to a startup business, but everything must be documented.

My dear follow your heart..but never lend anyone apart from your husband your whole life savings

CAPSLOCKED:


BUT IT'S A MAN'S JOB TO GIVE WOMEN MONEY... HAHAHAHA.

NO WONDER AUNTY CHIMAMANDA WANTS MEN TO STOP DOING THINGS FOR YOU PEOPLE (INCLUDING THE SIMPLEST THINGS LIKE OPENING DOORS) CUS MOST OF Y'ALL TERRIBLE HUMANS WHO DON'T DESERVE ANY LOVE OR FAVOURS.

DID YOU SEE WHERE THIS LADY SAID HER MAN HELPED HER WITH SOME MONEY TO DO BUSINESS? AND NOW HE'S UNFORTUNATE WHILE SHE'S BETTER THAN HIM AND ALL YOU WOMEN ON THIS THREAD ARE DOING IS DISSUADE HER NOT TO HELP HIM BACK JUST THE WAY HE HELPED HER.

YOU WANT HIM TO REMAIN BROKE SO SHE CAN BROKE-SHAME AND DISRESPECT HIM, AND JUMP ON TO THE NEXT AVAILABLE MAN.

MOST OF YOU GIRLS ARE TERRIBLE.
WOE BETIDE THE MAN THAT'LL TAKE ANY ONE OF YOU AS HIS WIFE OR ANYTHING SERIOUS.
HE'S DESTINED FOR RIDICULE, SORROW, POVERTY, PAIN AND UNTIMELY DEATH.

THIS IS WHY MEN DON'T GO TO WOMEN FOR HELP. YOU AIN'T GETTING NOTHING.
THIS IS WHY WOMEN DON'T GO TO OTHER WOMEN FOR HELP. NOTHING GO FALL OUT... EXCEPT SHAMING AND INSULTING YOU.

YOU CAN'T HELP YOUR MAN WITH CASH, YOU CAN'T PAY BILLS, YOU CAN'T CONTRIBUTE IN ANYWAYS TO ANYBODY'S LIFE...
YOU ONLY USE YOUR MONEY FOR WIGS AND MAKEUP AND YOU THINK YOU'RE REALLY LIVING? DAMN.

JUST LIKE MISSRAINE69 SAID... MONEY BRINGS OUT THE WORST IN PEOPLE. .

Clapping for this dude,u understand women very well,especially wicked n selfish Nigerian ladys..chai

Saff:
Please do NOT borrow him anything. PLEASEEE!!!

Or give him something that you’re ready to lose, pleaseee. But preferably nothing. Goodluck

U re a devil who does not deserve a man in her life..wickedness is ur middle name.spit!

fancy4eve:
Don't do to odas wat u will not lyk pple to do unto u, so advice her rightly

I there anything wrong with advising her to help her man?
So u won't help your man if u are in her shoes?

Rubbiish:

I there anything wrong with advising her to help her man?
So u won't help your man if u are in her shoes?

Neva said she shouldn't help, but said she should Gv wat she cn let go, 300k won't b a bad idea.

This is a very difficult and dicey one to do. But I would have ask you pray about it by asking what exactly could have led to the suddenly crumbling down of his business. Could it be that he was scammed while trying to do some kind of quick Biz?, or Traveling? If all this happens to be, I'm sorry you can't give away that huge amount. But if it isn't, then I guess #250,000 should at least be able to assist him. For if he truly loves and sincere about what he wants to do with the money, that amount will be enough to turn things around. Be wise and smart. Love is kind and very considerate

Suzzyyy:
Hello Nairalanders! Plz help! I hv been scared and confused abt a risk I want to tk so I decided to share for advice.

Im 29 and I hv a boyfriend who is 33. We hv been happily dating for close to 3 years now, he once helped me financially in a good way with 100k when I had problem with my little business, then he was doing pretty fine with his business, I sell plastics and hez into cloth business. But somtin happened last 2 months, he had terrible problems with his business and lost almost everything including his shop and in a bid to salvage his situation he ended up owing many pple, when all these started he didn't tell me, thou hez a kind of person that likes handling his problem alone without disturbing or telling me which I don't like bcus it somehow makes me feel less important and useful to him, I got to know when he changed, his attitude, moods and everything changed, hez always disturbed, thinking and always visiting pple, he payed less concern and attention to me, don't even call and when I call, he will be in a haste to end it, I became confused, so I had to asked what was going on, he said nothing, I got upset and insisted he must tell me, he then opened up, I felt so bad and almost cried, since then I have been trying to maintain his upkeep and sometimes give him money which hez not comfortable with.

The problem now Is that im scared, he asked for a huge amount of money from me which is 700k, he wants to start all over again in his cloth business and also clear some debt, and I can only boast of 820k home and abroad as a business woman, i just feel he saw my account balance before asking for this, Im scared to loose the money and him too. I love this guy but im so scared of doing this, he helped me when I needed money, but this sacrifice is bigger than me, he showed and detailed everything he will be doing with the money, Im just confused to gamble with my life savings, I know I might sound ungrateful what if the business or our relationship crumble? Won't I be stranded and doomed? My business is not that strong and we all know how most of sacrifices like this ended for people. Is this kind of risk worth doing for a boyfriend

Plz advice me on what to do, plz.

If you truly love him, help him out in his darkness hours, stand by him, he needs whatever helps you can render now than ever.
We say "love his all about sacrifice" dear, this is the time to show how far you can go for love.

Do whatever you can to help your man back to his feet, remember when you needed him he was there for you without weighting loses. I know it's not easy, but do it. Nature has a way of rewarding our good deeds, and our evil deeds.

stand by your man

read must comment here... juat that I wont categories all ladies.. but most of u females aint worth helpin... did any of u ever consider if he had more when he gave tha 100k, bcus he had a shop doesn't men he had no problems but yet openly gave that sum.. some of u even askin her to lend him d 200k.. but if tomorrow he makes it, she b d one enjoyin most of the finance.. then she won't be considerin d risks involved oo... fear woman

iceybux:
read must comment here... juat that I wont categories all ladies.. but most of u females aint worth helpin... did any of u ever consider if he had more when he gave tha 100k, bcus he had a shop doesn't men he had no problems but yet openly gave that sum.. some of u even askin her to lend him d 200k.. but if tomorrow he makes it, she b d one enjoyin most of the finance.. then she won't be considerin d risks involved oo... fear woman

I know stories of girls that have given their boyfriends their last penny only for the guy to travel abroad and marry another woman while breaking up with them. Some have even used their girlfriends hard earned money to marry other girls in Nigeria. Other’s have used the money to enter debts where they cannot pay back so they are both ruined. I doubt if the guy gave her his last 100k because at a time he did he was comfortable. He was also not stupid enough to show her is account ever. He also started keeping his distance from her. Who know whether he is even planning another marriage with another girl? Now the stress of marriage preparations is on him and he doesn’t mind borrowing from anywhere?

At least she was able to grow the 100k to 800k. Why can’t he start from 100k and grow the business till it reaches the capital he needs? Asking for 700k out of her 820k is crazy. Her own parents will slaughter her if they heard of this foolish attempt. Boyfriend and not husband. Please don’t compare 100k to 700k ever.

Look at the picture attached and see if he meets all conditions. A business should be treated as a separate entity from your business.

Is the money in your account yours or your business money??

My dear that's almost a million.. Give him what you can. Also do a thorough assessment of the situation.. What are the benefits.. What are the risks.. My advice

baddy404:
I’m into Uk Clothings Business and I do wholesales. I might be able to help your boyfriend. Message me on Whatsapp +447895202949

this one dey find him share of the 700k lol

Just give him what you can afford to loose, he is not your husband. What of if you lend him all that you have, and your business is closed and he didnt make it either, how will two of you manage.

tboks:
Firstly he is not your husband yet. Don't lend anyone any amount you can't let go. I've learnt that from experience. It doesn't mean you don't love him. Don't mind the people insulting you that you don't love enough. Lend him some, maybe 100k-200k. Don't trust anybody. Anything can happen. You might lend and he loses the money to fraudsters. What will you do? What if he invests it in his business and the business doesn't yield expected returns. What will you do? Only your husband deserves such huge risk.

Exactly my thoughts! At Op, take this advice.

give him. You won't regret it.

Hello OP,
I logged in just cause of you.

1. First 700K is not 100K, do not equate the two. For any man (angel or demon) to give you 100K freely, he has at least 900K to spare.

If your life will change drastically if you loose 700K, then do not ruin your life by giving that to someone. Nobody is infallible. The first rule of life is never lend out what you cannot loose.

2. Then separate business from pleasures. Why do you have 800k sitting in you account? If 800K is your life savings, you have a very low income level. At your income level you can not grow if you do not invest every spare penny. Go buy land or something, stop keeping money for the bank to use. Moreover, just one emergency can wipe out that sweat, commit it to something tangible that your can cashout in future.

3. 700K is not such a huge money. Your bf should be able to get that without putting you at risk. You are not a bank. Take your bf to a microfinance bank, speak with the bank manager on the available loan solutions they can offer him. You can help him by guaranteeing him for a loan, since you still have a steady income. For this you know he must have run away from Nigeria before you become liable for the money.

Cheers and Goodluck!

My dear, eti eh melo? I feel this guy is looking for an excuse to quit the relationship because if he truly loves you, he wouldn't come up with those attitudes. He is supposed to sit you down and explain his predicaments not forming attitudes. 700k is too much to lose in this present economy but if you don't mind losing you can gladly give without expecting anything in return. I'd been in your shoes oh and till date still regretting.