₦airaland Forum

crackhaus:
Haven't you heard you can't tell women what to do with their pregnancies, but you can tell men what to do with their money when it comes to taking care of a pregnancy they never wanted?

Fairness for all...

Okay what would you like to tell a woman about pregnancies, what to eat or what? Not all women knows they are pregnant the first two weeks, when it is one month, baby don dey form, so what will you like to tell her? That she should abort? Do you think abortion is an easy something? The way you guys talk like if reverse is the case, you can take half of what we go through with pregnancy and babies, nor vex me this sweet morning.

I am fine o, which side you dey?

murphyibiam15:
chief pikko, jokwa sir, e don tey oo..how your end

ornicus:
The moment she chose to fornicate I think those religious beliefs went out the window

Add adultery to the mix

Then Remember that it was a one night stand, if I'm not mistaken.

Prolife isn't just about religious beliefs please. Not all religious people are pro lifers. Many genuinely see it as murder. Because you commit fornication doesn't mean you agree with murder does it?

yeyeosoronga:
Prolife isn't just about religious beliefs please. Not all religious people are pro lifers. Many genuinely see it as murder. Because you commit fornication doesn't mean you agree with murder does it?

In for a penny, in for a pound. Is wages of sin not death again?
Or maybe the guy did it raw because wasting your seed is another sin.

You do not want to go the religious route in this.

crackhaus:
Haven't you heard you can't tell women what to do with their pregnancies, but you can tell men what to do with their money when it comes to taking care of a pregnancy they never wanted?

Fairness for all...

Thats the issue here. It is not fair to impose the consequences of a decision that was not jointly agreed. This is why women are disregarded and disrespected in some instances. When you unilaterally take a decision you cannot back up and have to be bailed out. Small time the woman will be using a a creche outside of her finances, and expecting the man to handle that as well.

ornicus:
Thats the issue here. It is not fair to impose the consequences of a decision that was not jointly agreed. This is why women are disregarded and disrespected in some instances. When you unilaterally take a decision you cannot back up and have to be bailed out. Small time the woman will be using a a creche outside of her finances, and expecting the man to handle that as well.

I applaud your going back & forth with these people, but you honestly shouldn't be bothered.
There's a saying that the quickest way to appeal to another person is through emotion, not reason.

How can anyone (ibkayee in focus) be quoting me to tell me choices have consequences, then in the same comment they're defending the woman who made a choice alone to have a baby for a man who explicitly said he doesn't want it, yet suddenly choices don't have consequences anymore and she shouldn't face the consequence of having to raise the child alone.

And their defence for this twisted logic is that the man already made the choice to have sex without protection (which was actually a joint decision), and as such, he has relinquished any rights to have further choices after the fact.

Do these people even read why they're typing?

Mehn I can't oo, way too many people view the world with preconceived notions, emotions, and feelings, and I refuse to be one of such basic people.
Nature blessed me with at least 1million brain neurons to use in just one lifetime before I return to dust, and I intend to activate more than half of them before my time is done. One way to do this is to view everything as dispassionately as possible.

Even if this lady were my own blood, I would tell her every single thing I have typed here word for word.
I do not suffer foóls, not even my own blood.

Fountainofyouth:
Okay what would you like to tell a woman about pregnancies, what to eat or what? Not all women knows they are pregnant the first two weeks, when it is one month, baby don dey form, so what will you like to tell her? That she should abort? Do you think abortion is an easy something? The way you guys talk like if reverse is the case, you can take half of what we go through with pregnancy and babies, nor vex me this sweet morning.

Suddenly abortion is not easy anymore (ibkayee said it's dangerous), yet y'all are the same ones clamoring for abortion rights around the world.

See I'm allergic to linear thinking, it's not my fault, but my mental development allows me to make deductions & conclusions using multiple data at every given moment.

If you wantu vex, vex very well.
Tenkyu.

ornicus:
In for a penny, in for a pound. Is wages of sin not death again?
Or maybe the guy did it raw because wasting your seed is another sin.

You do not want to go the religious route in this.

Exactly. Being prolife has little to do with religion in my own books. Murder isn't a crime or isn't wrong just because the religious books say so. It's a moral conviction regarding abortion. Personally I'm indifferent about it, but some people actually see it as murder.
Talking about religion, because you decide to fornicate and count it as sin doesn't mean you should rape someone? Raping someone and fornicating are 2 different sins with possibly similar consequences religious wise but with different consequences legally. Apples and oranges...

crackhaus:
Suddenly abortion is not easy anymore (ibkayee said it's dangerous), yet y'all are the same ones clamoring for abortion rights around the world.

See I'm allergic to linear thinking, it's not my fault, but my mental development allows me to make deductions & conclusions using multiple data at every given moment.

If you wantu vex, vex very well.
Tenkyu.

Must me and ibkyee use the exact same words? So because people clamour for the legality of abortions means it is easy? It's like you just love typing long epistles for the fun of it.

Nah you are not allergic to linear thinking or have any mental development, you are just as confused as they come.

Deji63:
Some of you are just cruel and wont understand the need for kindness towards women, and that need to protect them ntil you have little daughters whom you adore and cant stand them hurting.

Summary is you just wrote bullsh.it.

If he truly is a G as you call him,he wont get Lilly livered because his pictures are up on NAIRALAND. He is a fool first for sleeping with a woman he knows he cant have babies with unprotected AND, condoms and contraceptives are not always a hundred percent guatantee against pregnancy and then you go all raw. Then think you should run away from your responsibilities? Come on!

What emotional diatribe are you typing about having kindness towards women?
Shouldn't you be saying I should have kindness towards all people regardless of gender since you're the epitome of kindness?

Also talking about having little daughters. Lmao...
Dude, my own daughter in this same situation, I will tell her the same thing I am telling this lady here. Take care of your baby and quit trying to force someone who doesn't want anything to do with it to have something to do with it.

To even reveal the two-faced nature of situations like these, the women who do this NEVER try to force the father to be involved with the child emotionally and to be a dad, it's always about the money for child upkeep with no care for anything else. Always about child support.

Who is fooling who?


Krishna was right anyway, "From lucidity, comes knowledge."
When you've trained your mind to have enough clarity of thought, then we can have a conversation.

crackhaus:
I applaud your going back & forth with these people, but you honestly shouldn't be bothered.
There's a saying that the quickest way to appeal to another person is through emotion, not reason.

How can anyone (ibkayee in focus) be quoting me to tell me choices have consequences, then in the same comment they're defending the woman who made a choice alone to have a baby for a man who explicitly said he doesn't want it, yet suddenly choices don't have consequences anymore and she shouldn't face the consequence of having to raise the child alone.

And their defence for this twisted logic is that the man already made the choice to have sex without protection (which was actually a joint decision), and as such, he has relinquished any rights to have further choices after the fact.

Do these people even read why they're typing?

Mehn I can't oo, way too many people view the world with preconceived notions, emotions, and feelings, and I refuse to be one of such basic people.
Nature blessed me with at least 1million brain neurons to use in just one lifetime before I return to dust, and I intend to activate more than half of them before my time is done. One way to do this is to view everything as dispassionately as possible.

Even if this lady were my own blood, I would tell her every single thing I have typed here word for word.
I do not suffer foóls, not even my own blood.

I totally agree with u here.

What that lady is doing is blackmailing, simple.

She has no case.
Emotions don't win cases in the court.

Once it's woman and pregnancy, we ladies will throw common sense outta the window.

And instead of her to cool down and let people help look for possible solutions for her, she was busy throwing tantrums and we all blame that on pregnancy hormones.

None of us have been pregnant na so how can we tell how pregnant women react to issues.

It's a very big fool especially ladies that will go bare with a man if she dont have plan b or ulterior motive.

We all know how to play this game.

Somebody said abortion isn't an option.
It is. Abortion is very very safe except u go to a quack.

In Nigeria, married women abort daily more than single ladies without their husbands knowing and they haven't died from any complications. They take morning after pills etc cos at the end of the day, they are the ones who bear the brunt not to talk of unmarried women.

Now the guy is gallivanting around and she is chasing him up and down.
Guys can promise anything to go raw with ladies especially here where the law favours them. Until our constitution says otherwise, women should use their sixth sense when dealing with men.
The society is yet to favour women,so why cant you protect yourself.

Fountainofyouth:
[s]Must me and ibkyee use the exact same words? So because people clamour for the legality of abortions means it is easy? It's like you just love typing long epistles for the fun of it.

Nah you are not allergic to linear thinking or have any mental development, you are just as confused as they come.[/s]

Please take several seats.

crackhaus:
Please take several seats.

You know your words has no meaning outside here right?

Fountainofyouth:
You know your words has no meaning outside here right?

Why are you up in my face then?

Read & pass.

Op come and give us update. Have u been able to get hold of the baby daddy?

sassysure:
I totally agree with u here.

What that lady is doing is blackmailing, simple.

She has no case.
Emotions don't win cases in the court.

Once it's woman and pregnancy, we ladies will throw common sense outta the window.

And instead of her to cool down and let people help look for possible solutions for her, she was busy throwing tantrums and we all blame that on pregnancy hormones.

None of us have been pregnant na so how can we tell how pregnant women react to issues.

It's a very big fool especially ladies that will go bare with a man if she dont have plan b or ulterior motive.

We all know how to play this game.

Somebody said abortion isn't an option.
It is. Abortion is very very safe except u go to a quack.

In Nigeria, married women abort daily more than single ladies without their husbands knowing and they haven't died from any complications. They take morning after pills etc cos at the end of the day, they are the ones who bear the brunt not to talk of unmarried women.

Now the guy is gallivanting around and she is chasing him up and down.
Guys can promise anything to go raw with ladies especially here where the law favours them. Until our constitution says otherwise, women should use their sixth sense when dealing with men.
The society is yet to favour women,so why cant you protect yourself.

Nothing to add, nothing at all...

crackhaus:
Why are you up in my face then?

Read & pass.

I am up in your face cos I like being in your face, thing is, where is the face sef? You are amusing

sassysure:
I totally agree with u here.

What that lady is doing is blackmailing, simple.

She has no case.
Emotions don't win cases in the court.

Once it's woman and pregnancy, we ladies will throw common sense outta the window.

And instead of her to cool down and let people help look for possible solutions for her, she was busy throwing tantrums and we all blame that on pregnancy hormones.

None of us have been pregnant na so how can we tell how pregnant women react to issues.

It's a very big fool especially ladies that will go bare with a man if she dont have plan b or ulterior motive.

We all know how to play this game.

Somebody said abortion isn't an option.
It is. Abortion is very very safe except u go to a quack.

In Nigeria, married women abort daily more than single ladies without their husbands knowing and they haven't died from any complications. They take morning after pills etc cos at the end of the day, they are the ones who bear the brunt not to talk of unmarried women.

Now the guy is gallivanting around and she is chasing him up and down.
Guys can promise anything to go raw with ladies especially here where the law favours them. Until our constitution says otherwise, women should use their sixth sense when dealing with men.
The society is yet to favour women,so why cant you protect yourself.

I don't know how people don't get that the society is YOU and I.

Maybe if 'the society' called out men who indiscriminately impregnate women, as often as they slut shame women who get pregnant out of wed-luck, things will be different.

Maybe if 'the society' put as much responsibility for birth control on men, as it does on women, things will be different.

In saner climes, a married man who not only had an affair, but also lied about his marital status and is now denying responsibility for the pregnancy he initiated . . . . will be thoroughly disgraced and suffer severe consequences.

But in Nigeria, we just hate women. Women are to blame for EVERYTHING. The fact that you think a married woman getting an abortion is something to be taken lightly is of serious concern to me.

This man is married (why am I the only one concerned about this fact ) and had unprotected sex with a random woman . . . . He exposed his wife and kids to great risks and nobody is even talking about that!

PS: I have been pregnant before, and yes the hormones can make you go crazy . . . SO I will not address the OP's crazy behavior. If I were her I'll probably do worse!!!!

Fountainofyouth:
I am up in your face cos I like being in your face, thing is, where is the face sef? You are amusing

Now I have to start explaining to you how figures of speech work.

And you're laughing?

He lives in 1 room
He can hardly afford a tricycle.
Obviously, by all standards he is hardly responsible enough for marriage or an extra mouth. When you spread your legs so wide you should've thought about this.He hardly gives a toss about 'his child' much more you..carry your cross, get a job and train YOUR child.

Ishilove:
If indeed he is truly responsible after conducting a DNA test, he should be made to pay for the upkeep. They are two irresponsible adults who should be made to face the consequences of their irresponsibility. Whether it is a one-night stand or not, she didn't get herself pregnant so the one who knocked her up should face the sweet, musical sound of baby cries.

He is lucky we are not in the 20th century. The male members of her family would have beaten him silly and forced him to marry her.

So does it mean I have to personally give/feed contraceptives to whoever I'm with to avoid stories? This case is double edged oh.

Omoluabi16:
So does it mean I have to personally give/feed contraceptives to whoever I'm with to avoid stories? These case is double edged oh.

No, you could just use a Condom, and also avoid STDs . . . . . Win-Win for everyone!

UjuJoan2:
No, you could just use a Condom, and also avoid STDs . . . . . Win-Win for everyone!

About condoms, we know of people(men and women) who insist on doing it raw because it's 'sweeter'. Also, condoms can break. Ladies also do their ovulation maths bla bla.
When the sex is a one off thing, Child support or commitment is almost impossible.

yeyeosoronga:
Abortion is still illegal in Nigeria, the last time I checked. He cannot force a termination on her. She's the one at risk of unsafe abortion. Many women in Nigeria where abortion is illegal are facing the consequences of the unsafe abortions they've done in the past (infertility, infections, ectopic pregnancies even losing their lives etc).
Perhaps you can start advocacy that it should be made legal in Nigeria.
Meanwhile, Nigerians are so lazy with their reproductive health. Why?
So many chlamydia infections, gono everywhere. Why don't we have many sexual clinics around ?

Third world country probably.

As for the illegality of abortions, you and I both know it is still something many people do regardless.
Sometimes it is even non-invasive depending on how far gone it is.

All that isn't even the point.
If this woman didn't want to have this baby, she wouldn't have. Simple.

Omoluabi16:
He lives in 1 room
He can hardly afford a tricycle.
Obviously, by all standards he is hardly responsible enough for marriage or an extra mouth. When you spread your legs so wide you should've thought about this. He hardly gives a toss about 'his child' much more you..carry your cross, get a job and train YOUR child.

Oga I know you're not a learner.

It's all too common with women to start mentioning how much of a loser a man is after he does something to hurt their feelings.
Even Dangote can become useless in the eyes of a scorned wife tomorrow.

There's no rationale to their behaviour, ever.

crackhaus:
Oga I know you're not a learner.

It's all too common with women to start mentioning how much of a loser a man is after he does something to hurt their feelings.
Even Dangote can become useless in the eyes of a scorned wife tomorrow.

There's no rationale to their behaviour, ever.

E.g tonto dike But It's not really about women. Generally, humans tend to be like that.

UjuJoan2:
So he gets to just walk away. . . . no responsibility, no consequence . . because he has a 'choice'??

Is that really your opinion?

This is a child we are talking about, a person!

Welcome to the liberal world, where 'choice' is becoming the suitable replacement for common sense.

The thing with you and others is I don't see any of you complaining about people having choices when it accommodates your worldview, it only becomes a problem when the outcome of those choices go against your personal beliefs.

If there were laws criminalizing sexual relations between unmarried people, it's still you and your crew that will start screaming that everyone should have the 'choice' to have sex if they want.


Let me pick your brain:
If this woman was raped, got pregnant, then decided to keep the pregnancy, would you also be clamoring for the rapist to pay child support or will the conversation become a case against the woman for deciding to keep the child of a rapist?

Please a clear response will be appreciated.

Omoluabi16:
E.g tonto dike But It's not really about women. Generally, humans tend to be like that.

Well using your example, we can see which gender 'usually' has the bitter tales at the end of a bad deal.

UjuJoan2:
I don't know how people don't get that the society is YOU and I.

Maybe if 'the society' called out men who indiscriminately impregnate women, as often as they slut shame women who get pregnant out of wed-luck, things will be different.

Maybe if 'the society' put as much responsibility for birth control on men, as it does on women, things will be different.

In saner climes, a married man who not only had an affair, but also lied about his marital status and is now denying responsibility for the pregnancy he initiated . . . . will be thoroughly disgraced and suffer severe consequences.

But in Nigeria, we just hate women. Women are to blame for EVERYTHING. The fact that you think a married woman getting an abortion is something to be taken lightly is of serious concern to me.

This man is married (why am I the only one concerned about this fact ) and had unprotected sex with a random woman . . . . He exposed his wife and kids to great risks and nobody is even talking about that!

PS: I have been pregnant before, and yes the hormones can make you go crazy . . . SO I will not address the OP's crazy behavior. If I were her I'll probably do worse!!!!

Take it easy.
I have never been pregnant so how will I know.
I'm a man too.
Emotions don't win in the court of law.

Take that to the bank.

The way we talk about saner clime eeh

crackhaus:
Welcome to the liberal world, where 'choice' is becoming the suitable replacement for common sense.

The thing with you and others is I don't see any of you complaining about people having choices when it accommodates your worldview, it only becomes a problem when the outcome of those choices go against your personal beliefs.

If there were laws criminalizing sexual relations between unmarried people, it's still you and your crew that will start screaming that everyone should have the 'choice' to have sex if they want.


Let me pick your brain:
If this woman was raped, got pregnant, then decided to keep the pregnancy, would you also be clamoring for the rapist to pay child support or will the conversation become a case against the woman for deciding to keep the child of a rapist?

Please a clear response will be appreciated.

This your analogy is quite a stretch isn't it? This woman wasn't raped was she?

It was consensual sex between two adults, both knowing the full implication of their actions. So why do you guys now want to absolve the man here? HE didn't discuss birth control options with her, he didn't categorically state pregnancy was off the table, he conveniently hid the fact that he was married, maybe even hinted she was 'the one' (we all know how you guys get . . .) . . . he had unprotected sex with an adult female and is fully aware of the consequences.

Then when she gets pregnant, he unilaterally decides she goes through a life-threatening procedure, to save himself!!!

IF the woman was raped, against her consent . . . I doubt she will be hassling her RAPIST for support, as that will mean keeping him in her life forever.

PS: I will NEVER advocate for abortion for someone her age . . . no matter the circumstances.

Now I have a question for you . . .

Do you think that the responsibility for birth control should lie solely on the woman Ideally? Do you think men should be absolved from such responsibility?

UjuJoan2:
This your analogy is quite a stretch isn't it? This woman wasn't raped was she?

It was consensual sex between two adults, both knowing the full implication of their actions. So why do you guys now want to absolve the man here? HE didn't discuss birth control options with her, he didn't categorically state pregnancy was off the table, he conveniently hid the fact that he was married, maybe even hinted she was 'the one' (we all know how you guys get . . .) . . . he had unprotected sex with an adult female and is fully aware of the consequences.

Then when she gets pregnant, he unilaterally decides she goes through a life-threatening procedure, to save himself!!!

IF the woman was raped, against her consent . . . I doubt she will be hassling her RAPIST for support, as that will mean keeping him in her life forever.

PS: I will NEVER advocate for abortion for someone her age . . . no matter the circumstances.

Now I have a question for you . . .

Do you think that the responsibility for birth control should lie solely on the woman Ideally? Do you think men should be absolved from such responsibility?

You deserve a thousand like.

crackhaus:
I applaud your going back & forth with these people, but you honestly shouldn't be bothered.
There's a saying that the quickest way to appeal to another person is through emotion, not reason.

How can anyone (ibkayee in focus) be quoting me to tell me choices have consequences, then in the same comment they're defending the woman who made a choice alone to have a baby for a man who explicitly said he doesn't want it, yet suddenly choices don't have consequences anymore and she shouldn't face the consequence of having to raise the child alone.

And their defence for this twisted logic is that the man already made the choice to have sex without protection (which was actually a joint decision), and as such, he has relinquished any rights to have further choices after the fact.

Do these people even read why they're typing?

Mehn I can't oo, way too many people view the world with preconceived notions, emotions, and feelings, and I refuse to be one of such basic people.
Nature blessed me with at least 1million brain neurons to use in just one lifetime before I return to dust, and I intend to activate more than half of them before my time is done. One way to do this is to view everything as dispassionately as possible.

Even if this lady were my own blood, I would tell her every single thing I have typed here word for word.
I do not suffer foóls, not even my own blood.

The well being/interest of the child trumps this ‘whose consequence should supersede the other’s’ competition you’re holding.

Once the baby is in the picture, how you feel about it is irrelevant, not wanting to do something does not exempt you from your responsibilities lol especially when it was down to carelessness.