₦airaland Forum

AwkaetitiBabe:
Ogberaga Oshi

Butterscotch92:
I know I'm going to receive a lot of bashing here but I don't mind as I'm looking for solution. I've been following other related threads on the topic and it seems most men don't forgive women that cheated on them.

I cheated on my man. This happened over a year ago when the relationship was going through a rough patch. Actually I didn't set out to cheat and never planned it.

In fact the person it happened with was a person I was confiding in when I was trying to get solutions to my relationship issues.

This person was my married colleague that I joined to work in his car. I thought I could get mature advice by telling him. I was weak and emotionally down and on one of such days of crying to him it happened in his car.

It happened like 3 more times because I go to work with him and come back with him. But I was overcome with guilt (because he was married and for cheating) that I had to stop. But my mistake was that I didn't cut him off completely.

I remained cordial friends with him since he is a colleague and I stopped joining his car. He also moved to another branch. He called occasionally to try his luck but I never gave in. Somehow my man became suspicious by his calls and one thing led to the other and I had to confess.

My man said he has forgiven but can't get back together again. I have been following other threads with similar topics and I saw that men find it very hard to forgive a woman that once cheated.

In this case I'm truly sorry, I have learnt my lessons and I can never make that kind of mistake again. I don't love the man in question, I never wanted anything from him apart from advice from the onset, I stopped on my own, I only remained friends because he was my colleague. I love my man and will do anything to keep him and win his trust back. I'm not a cheat by nature.

I'm heartbroken and filled with guilt and regret. I can't talk to anyone in my circle for fear of condemnation because I'm wrong in every area.

Please is there any hope for me? How do I go about winning him back? How do I convince him that I truly regret my actions? How do I help him heal?

Sirvingeo:
Exactly, the man really tried breaking up with her. My circle of friends, including me will deliberately waste her time for nothing less than 2 years .For her to waste my investment and time , I will definitely misuse her biological clock.

Ornament2003:
Cluck

Butterscotch92:
It happened like 3 more times... But my mistake was that I didn't cut him off completely.

Somehow my man became suspicious by his calls and one thing led to the other and I had to confess.

My man said he has forgiven but can't get back together again. I have been following other threads with similar topics and I saw that men find it very hard to forgive a woman that once cheated.

Quality20:
its not really about fish brains pls. women are created like that, in religion, we d men are told that its better we touch fire than touch a strange woman cos it could generate sexual tension from d woman. On d other hand ,men don't really get into sexual tension when touched by women either mistakenly or deliberately.

Godiloveu:
God bless you �, this is what we ladies are facing every day, men are allowed to do all the wrong things n get away with it, they hit u, cheat on u, etc. And apologize just once n we come running back to them. It is well...pls men learn to forgive n forget too.
My advice to that young lady is to move n become a better version of now herself in d next relationship...wishing her peace

Sanchez01:
It's called principle and that of most men, particularly around relationships, are just about the same. I can live and tolerate just about any lady but one I won't spare is a cheat. True, there are more ladies who cheat these days but the patterns and signs are there ab initio and they are often ignored by guys.


Lol... That I forgive a cheat does not necessarily mean I can continue with them. Trust is broken already and there's little or nothing to be done about it. For me, I think people shouldn't be swayed by beauty or dress sense, accent and all those nonsense. Focusing on an individual is the best way to see what they are capable of. I can't recall how many times I have dodged bullets by ending with serial cheats who believe they can love easily after moving in the company of 3-4 men and finally settling for one.

I have my limits, as a human and as a man. Be saucy, be entitled, be whatever, but don't be a cheat and there'll be peace. For me, that code is as simple as anything.

About most wives being cheats, I think their husbands failed at finding certain things out.

thelish:
U can't heal him when u haven't healed urself.
U r loss urself, how do u find somebody else?
Don't allow a mistake define u.
Show him d new u. Full of confidence n courage.
Its his choice whether to come back or not.

TonyeBarcanista:
Never EVER take back a cheat! Forgive and BREAK UP

Great6Pack:
The worst set of hypocrites in this world are men. You can go Bleep as you like either as married man or while dating but it is a taboo for her to do it.

Let it be known here that I am not in anyway in support of cheating while married or courting. But let the truth be told, if you access 10 men, married or courting, at least 6 of them had at one time had sex with someone not their mate. One thing is sure, if this babe is the one that the man confessed to, she will happily forgive him and move ahead with the relationship.

Why can't men sometimes do same. Especially when you know your mate isn't promiscuous but was overtaken by moment of weakness?

Sis, please gather yourself together and concentrate on your work and life. I give you 3 months, a RESPONSIBLE guy will be dying to be your man. And if your present guy (soon to be ex) comes back, tell him he was in the past but you have moved on.

Please abuse me ONLY if you know you are innocent and never cheat. God is watching!!!

cococandy:
I just read the first paragraph and couldn’t go on.

You actually read this and posted it?

TYglobal:
Why are married men most persuasive?? you don't want anything with them but they never give up......just thinking out loud

Butterscotch92:
I know I'm going to receive a lot of bashing here but I don't mind as I'm looking for solution. I've been following other related threads on the topic and it seems most men don't forgive women that cheated on them.

I cheated on my man. This happened over a year ago when the relationship was going through a rough patch. Actually I didn't set out to cheat and never planned it.

In fact the person it happened with was a person I was confiding in when I was trying to get solutions to my relationship issues.

This person was my married colleague that I joined to work in his car. I thought I could get mature advice by telling him. I was weak and emotionally down and on one of such days of crying to him it happened in his car.

It happened like 3 more times because I go to work with him and come back with him. But I was overcome with guilt (because he was married and for cheating) that I had to stop. But my mistake was that I didn't cut him off completely.

I remained cordial friends with him since he is a colleague and I stopped joining his car. He also moved to another branch. He called occasionally to try his luck but I never gave in. Somehow my man became suspicious by his calls and one thing led to the other and I had to confess.

My man said he has forgiven but can't get back together again. I have been following other threads with similar topics and I saw that men find it very hard to forgive a woman that once cheated.

In this case I'm truly sorry, I have learnt my lessons and I can never make that kind of mistake again. I don't love the man in question, I never wanted anything from him apart from advice from the onset, I stopped on my own, I only remained friends because he was my colleague. I love my man and will do anything to keep him and win his trust back. I'm not a cheat by nature.

I'm heartbroken and filled with guilt and regret. I can't talk to anyone in my circle for fear of condemnation because I'm wrong in every area.

Please is there any hope for me? How do I go about winning him back? How do I convince him that I truly regret my actions? How do I help him heal?

AwkaetitiBabe:
Ode

dober:
I have read a lot of comments here and I only feel soory for you.

THE NEGATIVES:
First of all. You guys had consented sex, stop blaming it on the married man and on your emotions.

I think you really didn't genuinely love your bf. If you did, you would have stopped after the first time and amended your relationship with him by all means possible.

I[b] am sure you later discovered that the person you were cheating with isn't ready to have a life with you apart from the sex. And you had to run back to your supposed bf. If the married man wasn't married and was willing to marry you, I am also sure you wouldn't had even remembered to apologise to anyone or feel any guilt.
[/b]
HOWEVER
These may be your way forward......

Give ursef time.
Pray to your God to help you heal.
Get busy with work,
Disconnected yourself from that married man (mind you, he didn't take advantage of your vulnerability as we always hear from you ladies. You may have taken advantage of his too. ).
Be grateful he has forgiven you. Don't push him to accepting you back. If he comes back later, be very open with him like you would be to yourself.

Please don't let anyone make you feel like you have committed the worst crime on earth. A lot of us had been in this kinda mess before. And I must commend your efforts for confessing to him.
I feel you are a good woman..Please don't do that again for the sake of love..
Stay Blessed Butterscotch92

Ornament2003:
Schnook

AwkaetitiBabe:
Schmuck

Ornament2003:
Lemme school you more, dork

emmaodet:
Mr Sanchez, if all men keep dumping cheating gfs/wives, believe me, only 3 out of 10 men will have wives or faithful gfs left.
A lot and i mean a lot of women are fornicating and not faithful. The figure is very very high compared to what people believe.
Now the question is - should we forgive this ladies and continue or destroy family set up?
Because a lot of men will be without wives or should we just scrap marriage and adopt gf/bf pattern?
Oro yi gba ironu oo

chidiebereuzoma:
Pls don't give in to his pressures, you will surely meet a single guy that's gonna make you happy

AussiePlayboy:
Ogbeni, is it a must to get married? If they all cheat, then so be it. You men need to place value on a woman dating you, else she won't also really value you. Many of them don't already bring much to the table, yet you re enabling it by giving free pass to cheating.

Cheating is unforgettable

wirinet:
You are now contradicting yourself, your fiancée cheated on you 3 times and you forgave her, so why not forgive her the 4th time or the 10th time since sex is overrated and you are very forgiven, afterall as a Christian, you should never tire of forgiving.

She told him because he became suspicious of their phone conversations, she did not tell him of her own violation after the incidences. She was still cheating with the guys (although not sexually), by talking with him on the phone.

Shibaraba:
I'm here to bash and I will do so thoroughly. My name is shibaraba and I don't mince words.

Not once, not twice but thrice. Well Peter denied Jesus three times. Your man is not Jesus. And I hope he never forgives you.
How dare you.
I'm feeling his pain as I speak.
As in My personal punna somebody nack am. No be even for better hotel.... For inside car. Abasimikipanyong. Cheating is a process. What lead you to do it once it's sure you'll do it again.
Me advice for you, better continue nacking your colleague and leave your man. For if I was your man, we will keep dating till My wedding day... With another. Turn you to lord of the rings. You go turn maid, cook, driver, anything I want and I still won't marry you. For I will always see you as an okpo. And anytime you come back from an outing na soso sperm I go dey smell around you because e go be me like say you just go lick preeq finish.
No vex... Na my mind I talk. Truth is bitter. This is the truth

Butterscotch92:
I know I deserve all the bashing I'm receiving here and more. But I wonder why it's very difficult for most to believe that I'm actually repentant about the whole thing. I know I really hurt my man which is part of my pain. I can never repeat such action no matter the circumstances with what I've learnt and I believe if I am lucky enough to get a second chance I'll be a much better version of myself and be forever grateful. It happened in the car because I wouldn't have agreed to follow him elsewhere by then it would be premeditated. I rejected every of his attempt to meet him anywhere else. Those were moments of weakness although it cannot be justified.

IprintMONEY:
i forgave her because i was always away. and on some occasions, we had little issues and i told her its over . so mr, i am not contradicting myself. if i was around and she did it , i will see it differently. roger that?