₦airaland Forum

youngchopper:
Point or correction nobody is a LovePeddler here!
Every gal loves money including you as a man
If u get babe and u dont treat her fine bet u she is cheating on u! "Definitely" maybe u reside in space? My anger with her is to refer 20k as a poor man salary pere!

Riele:
Two words for you

EMPTY BARREL

Ariza:
With the recent outrageous increase in the numbers of "Help/Rant" threads opened by guys on this section, I am moved to give my Nigerian sisters a standing ovation, a thunderous applaud and a heartfelt doff. They do wonders .


However, I wonder on what type of Men society breed these days.Cry babies? Hypocrites? or confused lots? I wonder!

JustMe407:
Dear nairalanders, I need you honest advice on what to do. I am still a young man and any mistake now will have a grave effect on my future. So please, help a brother.

Be objective and consise please. It is a long narrative.

I have a girlfriend whom I have been dating for up to 10 months now. She has all the qualities of wife, friend and a partner. I mean, she prays for me, supports me and do many things that places her above average.

I've two issues that are bugging me;

First is, I just graduated from the University and started to follow the road map I designed for my life. I am hardworking, so I started doing business immediately after my defense. Interstate exports of perishables. While I was in school, I made a lot of money doing designs for students; I am a UI/UX designer. The problem here is that I can't account for all those monies I made. A lot of expenses especially for my girlfriend. Even till now, I am supposed to send her some money but will I continue like this? I need stability in my business and need to save more and need capital for the last mile logistics company I want to set up next year.

Second issue is; I recently returned from an event I attended in Lagos some days ago, I came back very late and was grossly tired. While we were chatting, she asked me some questions which I told her I was very tired and eventually, I slept off. My phone beside me till the next morning. Fast forward to yesterday, I told her of my intentions to concentrate more in building for the future - it doesn't mean our relationship would be off. She started asking questions like "do you need some space?" "Am I bugging you?" She also said I don't "speak her language enough" language here is bonding, intimacy and closure. I was surprised at her response.

I noticed she'd be online for a long time and won't reply me on time, so I asked her who she was chatting with and she replied someone. I ignored her. This morning she called, while we got talking I asked her about the person she was chatting with. She told me the guys name. And asked if I will forgive her of anything, I said yes. She now said, she was introduced to the guy and they got flirting from the day I came back from my journey and told her I was tired and needed to rest. Her excuse was that, I pushed her to and she just wanted someone to speak/talk to.

Now, my question is, Should I move on with my business and focus, or, should I continue with the relationship? I don't want to be with someone that gives up on me easily.

P.S I love her so much. And she does too. We've through a lot together.

Please moderators, help move this to front page for more contributions.

deltateam:
So for your mind dishing her money in bales means she'll be faithful, going by your writeup. I laugh in chinese: chuangyunghah!

ceegas:
Love is understanding.... it takes two to tangle. Instead of running to the next girl who may be worst... try talking to your girlfriend telling her what her flaws are as well as praising her for her good sides then observe for change... Every relationship involves spending though not unnecessarily... all is well

tck2000:
You this girl,close your mouth.You talk like someone who got no respect for elders.

tck2000:
You this girl,close your mouth.You talk like someone who got no respect for elders.

InsAne101:
[color=#990000][/color] stay away from my babe...

NarnieSnyper:
Ever since my ex told me she'd be okay with me if I were to go into "yahoo yahoo" so long as it doesn't involve blood......I lost all the love and care I had for her. Some girls are just there to keep us company at night and care for our sexual urge only....take those things away and you'll see you are dating a living mannequin.
She was just a trophy girlfriend my that made my friends envy me but deep down I wasn't happy. Someone that cannot support my business idea. All she wants is attention, money and sex. Though she isn't materialistic but she's just shallow. Ever since I dropped her and anything that has to do with relationship and focused on building myself and career...I have not regretted making such move

tck2000:
Your babe?...I thought you are a female or are you a Lesbian.

InsAne101:
oh! u neva know...

IAmStrange:
Hmmm!

I've always been an advocate of this method...

Work hard until you are financially capable to cater for a family. Build your character until you become a personage that can qualify as a potential good husband, father and in law...

And then look for a good woman... try all possible means to know her and everything you need to know about her to decide if she's right for you... Engage her and marry her!

All these love, dating, boyfriend and girlfriend issues, most times, are "robbing" tactics...

And it falls on both sides...

many times, the females do it to "rob" the males of their money...

while on the other hand, the males do it to "rob" the female of their vagina.

Na the two genders dey suffer that "scam" they call relationship.

Well, as for the first issue, I don't know how the spending process goes.. is she the one that asks or you are the one that's just too generous and you give her without her asking or because you think she needs it and will likely ask?

If You are the one that's just too generous, then you limit your generosity. That will not only help you save more but will also be giving her message that she should adjust her expectations from you.

If she's the one that asks, Oga, limit what you give her and reject some of her requests.

It's during trying or difficult times that we know true friends. It may be when you start limiting your spending on her that you will know if she truly loves you or not.

As for the second issue... What your girlfriend did is a sign of what may happen or might have happened if the matter becomes more complicated than that.

Someone who easily gives in to seeking attention elsewhere when the two of you are not talking? That's dangerous.

I'm not saying that it will happen for sure but it's dangerous.

Have you not heard stories of women who had misunderstanding with their spouses and then they sought solace in another man until that other man capitalised on her emotional state and slept with her?

There were even cases where it did not happen once. The first time it happened, the woman began to enjoy the "company" of that other man and they ended up having sex several or many more times.

And in a marriage, misunderstandings will most likely happen every now and then. It's not something that can easily be avoided. So if it happens at a time when there's another man in the picture, only God knows where it'll eventually end.

It doesn't certainly define her but your girlfriend seems to have such weakness.

Therefore, I'm asking you now - not to just break up with her - but to use your sense and open your eyes very well. Try as much as possible to study her and ask wise people for advise concerning her so you will not have problems in your marriage.

By the way, Imes is coming

mastermaestro:
That's a terrible personality you got there. Lock her out of your life forever! Damn!

InsAne101:
u mean u let her go 4 telling d truth? wat's d big deal there, i bet u neva liked her...gosh!

tck2000:
Hey forget your ranting.if i want to talk to her,you can't do anything about it.

InsAne101:
He sure can do sth about...lol but u neva know, where is Imes today...

Thane:
Pls bros, I need a biz to join and build my self too. I'm desperate

emmaodet:
Lol. Most men you see today have been raised by the so called women. In most hones, the mother spends more time with the kids than the man.
About guys crying and wailing, it's okay and normal. They will learn and more coming behind are learning fast from this.
In the next 20 years, the tide will change because the society will have produced soooooo much cold, irresponsible, not love-struck men that will turn to deab beat dads, Bleep boys aline without sense of responsibilities etc. Then you will look back and appreciate these good guys wailing now.
Moreover, i think you need to go to bellanaija and other female dominated sites and see where they are wailing and gnashing of teeth.

tck2000:
You this girl,close your mouth.You talk like someone who got no respect for elders.

InsAne101:
He sure can do sth about...lol but u neva know, where is Imes today...

Riele:
I only respects those who deserves respect .

Shibaraba:
I feel annoyed when I see other people read stories from weaklings and I read it too.



At his age he is thinking of how to handle a girl when our previous leaders at this same age is thinking of planning coups and ruling a country.

[s]Mr op. Tell her sorry. Take her to Shoprite and propose to her. Awaiting another thread from you. How my wife got pregnant outside wedlock. Una go hear word[/s]

JustMe407:
Dear nairalanders, I need you honest advice on what to do. I am still a young man and any mistake now will have a grave effect on my future. So please, help a brother.

Be objective and consise please. It is a long narrative.

I have a girlfriend whom I have been dating for up to 10 months now. She has all the qualities of wife, friend and a partner. I mean, she prays for me, supports me and do many things that places her above average.

I've two issues that are bugging me;

First is, I just graduated from the University and started to follow the road map I designed for my life. I am hardworking, so I started doing business immediately after my defense. Interstate exports of perishables. While I was in school, I made a lot of money doing designs for students; I am a UI/UX designer. The problem here is that I can't account for all those monies I made. A lot of expenses especially for my girlfriend. Even till now, I am supposed to send her some money but will I continue like this? I need stability in my business and need to save more and need capital for the last mile logistics company I want to set up next year.

Second issue is; I recently returned from an event I attended in Lagos some days ago, I came back very late and was grossly tired. While we were chatting, she asked me some questions which I told her I was very tired and eventually, I slept off. My phone beside me till the next morning. Fast forward to yesterday, I told her of my intentions to concentrate more in building for the future - it doesn't mean our relationship would be off. She started asking questions like "do you need some space?" "Am I bugging you?" She also said I don't "speak her language enough" language here is bonding, intimacy and closure. I was surprised at her response.

I noticed she'd be online for a long time and won't reply me on time, so I asked her who she was chatting with and she replied someone. I ignored her. This morning she called, while we got talking I asked her about the person she was chatting with. She told me the guys name. And asked if I will forgive her of anything, I said yes. She now said, she was introduced to the guy and they got flirting from the day I came back from my journey and told her I was tired and needed to rest. Her excuse was that, I pushed her to and she just wanted someone to speak/talk to.

Now, my question is, Should I move on with my business and focus, or, should I continue with the relationship? I don't want to be with someone that gives up on me easily.

P.S I love her so much. And she does too. We've through a lot together.

Please moderators, help move this to front page for more contributions.

youngchopper:
Listen youngman! You don't need a damn drama in your life! Let me tell u lil story of mine!
Yesterday been 20th of December 2019 my gal friend who have been dating for just 2 months asked me on chat for money for Christmas hair 20k! I can afford it but what made me mad was I told her if she knew that 20k is somebody's salary and the fool replied " na poor person salary be that" since 24 hrs she has been calling have decided to snub her for a very long period of time! Just a galfriend what if I have her type like 5? Do u know the amount of prayer my sweet monther will pray for my head if I wire her 20k? Use your head youngman, your happiness is not tied around her!

tomdon:
Never give a woman emotional advantage over you. The only reason you should spend on a woman beyond what you can throw away is when she's your wife or betrothed.

jimcaddy:
Yes some women will open mouth and say "What have you done for me that no one has ever done". Nigerian men are overtrying sef. In the UK or US, couples love genuinely. Only in Nigeria does love equate money and vice versa. In Nigeria, spending money is a prerequisite for love.. We put the "Nigerian factor" in all that we do in this country.

youngchopper:
Have given her more than that in terms of gift and birth day celebration but that reply got me thinking! Is this the type of low life woman have been going out with