Frankyboy1:
There was this classy sexy and smart girl I was eyeing but didnt have d lever cause she was working class and strict, for a long time we were cosy and chatting up, but she no de gree give me d green light,though i second guessed she might have also been into me,one day she stopped by as usual for the chitty chats, and we started gisting,tell her say I wan go bath, next thing I carry olive oil enter bathroom, stroke my gbolla until he stand, meanwhile my heart was racing,then rubbed enough olive oil on the massive rod, I told my sef, once I come out, it is either hit or miss, mennn,na so I enter parlor with my rod dripping and shining, but with my heart racing and my reputation at stake, when I stepped in, her eye balls grew big and misty,...... Hmmmmmm! If I finish d story here ehen, but up till today we still talk and laugh about it, cause she will be my wife in March,,,,, crazy crazy moment

Your own better

I hope sai you no tell lies?!

Frankicent:




Your wife hmmm.. make I no talk.

Talk d talk, guy forget! No body holy pass

realokopi:
I was chatting with this particular lady that I wanted to f*ck. She said all want from her is just sex so she will not accept me. Then I told her that why would I invite her just for sex that if it's sex I want then the 10k I have in my mind to give her I can use it to f*ck plenty ashawo. Immediately I mentioned 10k,the babe change mouth ooo . She said she will come the nxt day and of course she came. I f*ck the living daylight out of her and ended up giving her 8k. And all these while I thought the girl was holy Mary oo.

8k u try sha
Na 500 I go give her and still collect the change from the bus driver ,,

I hate girls way no get truth

tunderoc:
I arranged with my kid sis, told Laleh we were going for a picnic so he allowed us use his jalopy. Dropped my lil sis at her friends then drove to another state to meet a lady I have not seen before (na those days b4 Facebook)... Feeling was mutual and we stated dating, had a break for 2 years, came back together and now 10 years in marriage.

Lols is this real??

Btw what's the meaning of laleh and jalopy?

xxxtedyxxx:


Investment.....investment...

The one who invests less in a convo, is the one in control; and also the one that feels less pain should a break up happen.



She was the dominant one.

You feel much pain whenever you remember her because you invested more than she did.


Always watch your investment level in any convo.

fallacy
He was in love
quit with the investment bullshit

I usually lie to impress them

Nnemuka:
hmmm No homo and you are liking a man? Are you bottom or top? send him a PM already

That's not what I meant hey! Dey well na.

Sold my car to buy okada so that anytime am giving her a lift, her two oranges will be resting on my back..

Since I cannot summon the courage to say anything to her.

merits:
I stole so many things to impress girls,such as � goat, chicken, electric kettle, money and so on.

you need to account for your sins.Go to the nearest police station and report yourself.

larryking540:


So drinking achohol and still condinate ur self is actually bad behavior?

No bro. That’s not what I mean.
I was only trying to define the moral I am talking about. See the attached image

GeniusWannabe:

That's not what I meant hey! Dey well na.

Perfect love stories begin this way
he might be into you too.

pocohantas:


No insults dear. Post it

Call me put with EVIDENCE. Is that more difficult than the insults you have been typing?

And who are you to tell me "no insults"? You well so??

You denied your existence in here...You denied everything about your history in here...but you want me to give you "evidence"

E be like say you dey mental...Lol

Like I said, as far as say na nairaland, once I sight any yeye post wey you make...trying to form Don Corleone I go call you out. Where evidence is required to call your bluff for all to see, I go drop am.

You be small pikin...you are small fry!! Hop off my mentions now.

Bluezy13:

I really feel for you. Ungrateful family, they must be.

the matter just make to love any girl again come tire me

Nnemuka:
Perfect love stories begin this way he might be into you too.

Lol na who con be this one na?

Nnemuka:
Perfect love stories begin this way he might be into you too.

Lol na who con be this one na?

Finchmgh:

No bro. That’s not what I mean.
I was only trying to define the moral I am talking about. See the attached image

Baba even if I drink 2 bottle of star ,I still kw right from wrong

I dated this girl in my school days. She was a fresher. At first I lost interest when she told me she was a virgin and it was a no sex relationship.

But she was already into me, so whenever my friends see us together they were always giving this comment about how pretty she is and how tall and straight she looks so those words motivated me and gbam that was how my feelings towards her changed and I feel in love.


I was always trying to get into her honey pot, I started giving her monthly stipends, for 2 years she was on my payroll. I changed her phone, those time wey blackberry dey hot! Promise land I no see and she keeps asking for more.

The phone got faulty and it was her birthday in school so I had to sacrifice my phone and gave me her own to repair. After getting her phone done. I inserted my sim bad decided to go through her BBM lo and behold what I saw ehn.... I was close to tears my girl has been jumping from one nigga to another to shorten the whole story I played her to come to my house and I gave her one hot slap bad she starred crying. I felt remorseful we sorted it out.

After that time she still refuse promise land and she started asking for n upgrade. I had to collect her phone and promise to sell so I could add money to buy another one for her. I sold the phone and went to chill jeje with my guys. My own way of revenge but e still pain me sha say I no see the girl chop. Since then I no dey impress and girl again oo. I learnt the hard way.

Jobminister:
Sold my car to buy okada so that anytime am giving her a lift, her two oranges will be resting on my back..

Since I cannot summon the courage to say anything to her.

You are not serious

philip0906:

And who are you to tell me "no insults"? You well so??

You denied your existence in here...You denied everything about your history in here...but you want me to give you "evidence"

E be like say you dey mental...Lol

Like I said, as far as say na nairaland, once I sight any yeye post wey you make...trying to form Don Corleone I go call you out. Where evidence is required to call your bluff for all to see, I go drop am.

You be small pikin...you are small fry!! Hop off my mentions now.

More rants. The onus is on you to prove.

WE are waiting...

Na Paleh I wan write jare, Jalopy na old car...my dad owns an Isuzu trooper then and my na real o.

vincentjk:


Lols is this real??

Btw what's the meaning of laleh and jalopy?

People like us na for bed we dey impress babes o. I don give one girl head in her smelly pussy while trying to impress her. I regretted doing it dat day. I nearly collapse

... I wanted doing that tho but my conscience pricked me.

larryking540:


8k u try sha
Na 500 I go give her and still collect the change from the bus driver ,,

I hate girls way no get truth

post=85348059:
People Buying Barbecue from us give us a lot of impression about them.......positively.

Making profit the legal way is the way to go.

Barbecue is bae.

And we are always there to impress people with our Barbecue also.

Having friends round on a beautiful weekend to enjoy eating food freshly grilled on the BBQ is impressive enough.

Once you get chatting and drinking in a relaxed atmospehere, the rest issa goal.


Manna issa Goal.

Barbecue issa Goal

Made in Naija issa Goal.

Impression issa Goal.

This beautiful thread issa goal.

The OP issa Goal.

Nairaland issa Goal.......

Abeg make we go continue our grilling tinz biko.

Se y'all

So you sell SUYA

larryking540:


Did you fuvkk her bro ,,,,,

Why not? If I don't have plans to fvck I wouldn't have invited her in the first place and waste my time to cook for her.

Lmao! Funny experience by different folks

I am not saying I have never done something to impress the opposite sèx but I have never gone out of my way to impress any girl, probably that is why they see me from a different angle and jump at the chance to date me.

My humour and sarcastic nature does the job for me. I do what I want to do because I want to and not because somebody wants me to. The latest chick I just landed just blew off another guy who has been trying to impress her for weeks now....why? Because I am ME!

realokopi:
... I wanted doing that tho but my conscience pricked me.

U need to grow more mind o,,,

I hate ladies that lie ,, mostly the I am A virgin ,after tearing the pants of only to see a dripping big well that. Can swallow your full hand asking for more ,na drug I go take hammer u ,make my dick reach the womb self

tunderoc:
Na Paleh I wan write jare, Jalopy na old car...my dad owns an Isuzu trooper then and my na real o.

Lols this made me laugh so much

Happy married life sha

I remember back then in secondary school, I wrote a girl a love letter with a golden pen! I’ve forgotten totally, not until she gave me a voice note a couple of days back and reminded me... I could feel in her voice, it was one of the best experience she had. Made me feel like ladies’ man

Bahamas95:
Why not? If I don't have plans to fvck I wouldn't have invited her in the first place and waste my time to cook for her.

No lie oo,,

Was to bring a girl to my famiky house and lied to her that I was living with my cousin and my mother was actually my aunt , and that my parents stayed in America, that I just came for the hols. She buy the lie die. Las las when I grew older I discovered that there was actually no need to lie to impress a girl.

larryking540:

No lie oo,,

Why would I lie? I can't do without sex.


Even expecting one any moment from now

Frankyboy1:
Hmmmmmm! If I finish d story here ehen, but up till today we still talk and laugh about it, cause she will be my wife in March,,,,, crazy crazy moment

abeg come finish the story o...