₦airaland Forum

Rapmoney:
Why Friendship Should Come Before Sex In A Relationship

We live in an era where sex is the first thing most young men think when they intend starting a relationship with a member of the opposite gender. The female folks are not left out. Most young women will 'size' an approaching man from a far. They will not fail to estimate, calculate and approximate the financial status of the man. And if their calculations seem accepted or okay by them, they will not hesitate to start up an affair with the man with utmost alacrity. This is often times disastrous. One mind think sex and the other thinks financial gains (and even sex sometimes too).

Friendship goes beyond sexual attractions. It has to do with having a personal relationship with someone and being aware of both positives and negatives in his/her life. Allowing sex to come before friendship may make both parties to hide vital things about themselves. Most people (especially the female folks) would hide things about themselves after series of sexual acts because they feel there is a bond that has been created which signifies 'commitment' and as such, they would not want the negatives in their lives to terminate the affair.

Have you noticed that you might find it easier to talk about negatives or embarrassing secrets in your life with a friend you have no sexual attachments with than one who you sleep with? It is because true friendship was not formed before you delved into sex. Early sex makes most people to hide things that could practically tear a marriage into shreds later on when they are discovered. Early sex brings with it, bags, bags and more bags of false commitment and attachment.

There are vital things that each partner is supposed to know before a committed relationship is formed. Sex may not allow us to ascertain these things. We have been engrossed in the sweetness of it that we cannot share the shortcomings in our lives in order not to lose the 'sweet flavour of sex'. There are people who see themselves as partners/lovers and have sex regularly yet they might not even know the health status of each other and other little vital things that are easily neglected. That is not a healthy relationship; it is just a long term hookup!!! There are even guys who do not know their girlfriend's surname and vice-versa. They only know him/her as Collins, Fehintola or Kesiena. Sex for these people could be 5 times a week too. If such common information is not known, then which information will you know that is less important than that?

If my post does not harshly condemn or drag sex before marriage on the ground, realize that I am just a social writer who grew up in the streets of Warri and not a moralist. I leave that for the moralists and religionists to flog.

Abfinest007:
the two goes together sex n friendship

Rapmoney:
Why Friendship Should Come Before Sex In A Relationship

We live in an era where sex is the first thing most young men think when they intend starting a relationship with a member of the opposite gender. The female folks are not left out. Most young women will 'size' an approaching man from a far. They will not fail to estimate, calculate and approximate the financial status of the man. And if their calculations seem accepted or okay by them, they will not hesitate to start up an affair with the man with utmost alacrity. This is often times disastrous. One mind think sex and the other thinks financial gains (and even sex sometimes too).

Friendship goes beyond sexual attractions. It has to do with having a personal relationship with someone and being aware of both positives and negatives in his/her life. Allowing sex to come before friendship may make both parties to hide vital things about themselves. Most people (especially the female folks) would hide things about themselves after series of sexual acts because they feel there is a bond that has been created which signifies 'commitment' and as such, they would not want the negatives in their lives to terminate the affair.

Have you noticed that you might find it easier to talk about negatives or embarrassing secrets in your life with a friend you have no sexual attachments with than one who you sleep with? It is because true friendship was not formed before you delved into sex. Early sex makes most people to hide things that could practically tear a marriage into shreds later on when they are discovered. Early sex brings with it, bags, bags and more bags of false commitment and attachment.

There are vital things that each partner is supposed to know before a committed relationship is formed. Sex may not allow us to ascertain these things. We have been engrossed in the sweetness of it that we cannot share the shortcomings in our lives in order not to lose the 'sweet flavour of sex'. There are people who see themselves as partners/lovers and have sex regularly yet they might not even know the health status of each other and other little vital things that are easily neglected. That is not a healthy relationship; it is just a long term hookup!!! There are even guys who do not know their girlfriend's surname and vice-versa. They only know him/her as Collins, Fehintola or Kesiena. Sex for these people could be 5 times a week too. If such common information is not known, then which information will you know that is less important than that?
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If my post does not harshly condemn or drag sex before marriage on the ground, realize that I am just a social writer who grew up in the streets of Warri and not a moralist. I leave that for the moralists and religionists to flog.

ashewoboy:
that is what is called "friends with benefit.". I prefer it to relationship. seunmohmoh. that is what I wanna have with you. mofekajomadorawa.

mofeoluwadassah:
Here to read comments

Eulalia:
I think it should be friendship, courtship, marriage, then sex. .

MISSCONGENIALITY:
Op you are very correct. But these days guys rush into to sex because they are afraid of being friends with a girl. I feel more comfortable talking with a guy as a friend than as a boy friend. That's why you will see a girl that has a boyfriend but feels comfortable with another guy who happens to be just a friend.

thesmallgod:
Well, I think it should be Friendship>Courtship>Sex>Marriage

kurupt1:
Because most girls don't have sense nowadaysw

Eulalia:
Your opinion.

DoubleEngine007:
Op you're correct.. I believe that guys who jump to sex without friendship sees those girls as oloshos,and that's what most of them truly are..

Our nowadays girls don't need the friendship at all.. 95% of them usually work with this saying "money for hand back for ground. No girl should ask me of how I got the statistics. Guys are aware of this fact, and that's why they rubbish our nowadays girls.. And most girls of this generation lacks wisdom,to know who truly love them and who doesn't... As long as d guy has ego and big preek,he is good to go.. Even if he is a beast,she will tell you,that she will change him..
Patiently waiting for those dumb ass,that calls themselves feminist here.. Quote me talk nonsense,make ogun kill you..