How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? - Family (14)

How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? - Family (14) - Nairaland

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Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by GIdiata(m): 8:13am On Jul 07, 2020

Bola146:
jobless girl, that is her cup of tea

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Olatunde10(m): 8:14am On Jul 07, 2020

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Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by holyokoto(m): 8:16am On Jul 07, 2020

ollins:
Let me cut the story short. Had a fling with this girl, along the line she got pregnant. You know all that talk of "if you could sleep with her, then you must marry her" "if you got her pregnant then you must marry her", Iooking back now, I wished I hadn't listened to all those voices.

I knew in my heart that I didn't love her, even she knew but the pressure from the family was too much, I had to marry her. On my marriage day I was practically crying within me.

Her character is just opposite of all I wanted in a woman, she's barely educated, loud and loquacious.

That's my cross I am carrying today, stuck in a loveless marriage.

The warmth and Romance is absent from our home, we have not had intimacy since beginning of the year till now, we just have no interest anymore in each other. We are just living together for the sake of our child.

My question now is how does one cope�? Is this how I am going to live the rest of my life?

I feel your pain brother, am also facing exactly what you are facing for ten years now, and no solution, we had intimacy last August 2017. Dying inside and outside always wishing for separation, tight down with two kids

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Jcan: 8:18am On Jul 07, 2020

My brother marriage na package, anything u see inside na ur gift. U don open nam be say u don open nam. Just manage her.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by od501: 8:20am On Jul 07, 2020

bukatyne:
Brother Ollins,

If this lady is as terrible as this, how were you able to get an erection to stick it into her?

How did you start the toasting to get her into your bed and arms?

The same magic you worked to get her pregnant, use it again.

It is in you like peak!

My brother, konji na bastard oo... Shey u know?

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Skmoda360(m): 8:20am On Jul 07, 2020

ollins:
Let me cut the story short. Had a fling with this girl, along the line she got pregnant. You know all that talk of "if you could sleep with her, then you must marry her" "if you got her pregnant then you must marry her", Iooking back now, I wished I hadn't listened to all those voices.

I knew in my heart that I didn't love her, even she knew but the pressure from the family was too much, I had to marry her. On my marriage day I was practically crying within me.

Her character is just opposite of all I wanted in a woman, she's barely educated, loud and loquacious.

That's my cross I am carrying today, stuck in a loveless marriage.

The warmth and Romance is absent from our home, we have not had intimacy since beginning of the year till now, we just have no interest anymore in each other. We are just living together for the sake of our child.

My question now is how does one cope�? Is this how I am going to live the rest of my life?

You are in for a long ride.....why not work things out with her. I know you might have talked to her and it's not working, maybe you should see a marriage counselor.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Karlifate: 8:22am On Jul 07, 2020

DigitB:
My thoughts: that's your own cross. Carry it.
You lied about loving her just to bleep her. Now the report card is out.

Probably you're one of those Red pill shit guys and all that

Now Karma and his darling Nemesis has paid you a visit

Carry your cross man. Na so life is.

If you think of divorcing her and abandoning your child, premium tears awaits.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by chris51(f): 8:25am On Jul 07, 2020

ollins:
Let me cut the story short. Had a fling with this girl, along the line she got pregnant. You know all that talk of "if you could sleep with her, then you must marry her" "if you got her pregnant then you must marry her", Iooking back now, I wished I hadn't listened to all those voices.

I knew in my heart that I didn't love her, even she knew but the pressure from the family was too much, I had to marry her. On my marriage day I was practically crying within me.

Her character is just opposite of all I wanted in a woman, she's barely educated, loud and loquacious.

That's my cross I am carrying today, stuck in a loveless marriage.

The warmth and Romance is absent from our home, we have not had intimacy since beginning of the year till now, we just have no interest anymore in each other. We are just living together for the sake of our child.

My question now is how does one cope�? Is this how I am going to live the rest of my life?

If the girl was good enough for sex, then she is good enough for marriage, since you decided not to have protective sex.

You can't eat your cake and have it.

Enjoy your loveless marriage.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Liposure: 8:27am On Jul 07, 2020

OriOko88:
Interesting. So you do not touch your wife for almost 6 months, and you're living under the same roof?? I guess your wife isn't attractive enough, that now gives room for saying you don't love her. She's local and not sexy, that's simply your problem.

I can't imagine myself indoor with a woman without fvcking d shit outta her for six months. That's why I always pray to marry a woman I'm sexually attracted to. Even if I don't love you, sha have breast and ass for doggy. Sex is d engine that keeps marriage moving.

my nigger

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Enemyofpeace: 8:28am On Jul 07, 2020

VickyRotex:
Only person wey don smoke osogbo weed go quote imself for im comment. We know sey na you be notoriousbabe, yet you dey quote yourself. You well so? >>>rhetorical question Get sense for once.

oiiin

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Ryocaj(m): 8:31am On Jul 07, 2020

Y would u be forced to get married to someone.. Them use Hezbollah threaten u ni.. u got her pregnant doesn't mean u will marry her.. it was consensual.. u didn't rape her.. so far u agree to take responsibility if d kid.. its all gud.. she becomes one of d baby mamas in town.. which is like d norm now.. u better get out of d marriage b4 bitterness sets in for both of u n u start thinking of ways to hurt urselves...

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Bossman25(m): 8:33am On Jul 07, 2020

God don catch u......Hold body or Use Condom.
Well, turn her to baby Mama. Move out of that house, and get your self another place. Take care of her wellbeing and also that of the child.
Your Hustle don triple be that.

ollins:
Let me cut the story short. Had a fling with this girl, along the line she got pregnant. You know all that talk of "if you could sleep with her, then you must marry her" "if you got her pregnant then you must marry her", Iooking back now, I wished I hadn't listened to all those voices.

I knew in my heart that I didn't love her, even she knew but the pressure from the family was too much, I had to marry her. On my marriage day I was practically crying within me.

Her character is just opposite of all I wanted in a woman, she's barely educated, loud and loquacious.

That's my cross I am carrying today, stuck in a loveless marriage.

The warmth and Romance is absent from our home, we have not had intimacy since beginning of the year till now, we just have no interest anymore in each other. We are just living together for the sake of our child.

My question now is how does one cope�? Is this how I am going to live the rest of my life?

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by EmekaBlue(m): 8:35am On Jul 07, 2020

no bother urself...just dey play away match outside

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by olenime(m): 8:36am On Jul 07, 2020

Well in my own case, I don't love this gal as well, she got pregnant through frequent refusal of no condom.

Was already planing to bear my cross by marrying her until after 4months she said the pregnancy came down.

I had to run for my life. She persuaded on seeing me again, omo I japa oh.

Hope I'm safe safe Sha?

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Nobody: 8:37am On Jul 07, 2020

let every man carry their own cross, as they say. So carry your own cross.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Nobody: 8:44am On Jul 07, 2020

Hhmmmm. I am going thru the same challenge too so I can feel u. But the differences is I moved past it. Love can be built from time to time if you want to. I stayed because of my child, I sat her down and we discussed at length about how we can move forward. Then, she abide and became my best friend even though we were not in love. It has been 7 years together and we are happy.
So, in your case, u have a choice to stay or leave. One thing that is very important is one's happiness. If that is taken away, that's a trouble. If you are not happy, or the arrangement is becoming toxic, you have to run for your life. So, You have a choice but whatever u chose, put your child into considerations too. He/She never asked for it.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Olutoyeemmanuel(m): 8:46am On Jul 07, 2020

ollins:
Marriage is a one time thing and I don't see you getting out of this one.
I'll advice you put in efforts to shape her into a woman you will love.
Most "love at first sight" relationships don't last,
but those built over the time lasts longer and stronger when the connection eventually happens.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Crownstar01: 8:46am On Jul 07, 2020

ollins:
Let me cut the story short. Had a fling with this girl, along the line she got pregnant. You know all that talk of "if you could sleep with her, then you must marry her" "if you got her pregnant then you must marry her", Iooking back now, I wished I hadn't listened to all those voices.

I knew in my heart that I didn't love her, even she knew but the pressure from the family was too much, I had to marry her. On my marriage day I was practically crying within me.

Her character is just opposite of all I wanted in a woman, she's barely educated, loud and loquacious.

That's my cross I am carrying today, stuck in a loveless marriage.

The warmth and Romance is absent from our home, we have not had intimacy since beginning of the year till now, we just have no interest anymore in each other. We are just living together for the sake of our child.

My question now is how does one cope�? Is this how I am going to live the rest of my life?

She probably does not have sex appeal. I know the feeling. wink

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by wacoj(m): 8:49am On Jul 07, 2020

People need to understand something here. Sleeping with a girl doesn't necessarily mean you love her. The truth is that erection can direct attention wrongly. Why do you think that people regret after sleeping with a girl a times.
Mr. Poster, I understand how you feel. Some women are just not it especially after coming into your house as your wife. This is when you begin to see the real them in them.
I will advice you to work things out with her but if it isn't working, get a divorce. NEVER YOU HIT A WOMAN.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by veave(f): 8:52am On Jul 07, 2020

Chigold101:
selfishness in the highest order.
Note: the op didn't complain of any wrong doing from the lady, therefore the marriage looks loveless because this guy made it so.
Marriage in reality is not about marrying who you love but about loving who you marry.
This guy should stop chasing shadow and sit his ass down and build his home with his wife
It might be easier for him to move on, but it won't be easy for the lady. When this guy's dic.k was telling him to fuc.k the lady, where was love then?

Let me tell you: people who enjoy their marriage do so because they decided to make it so, it's not because of any kind of special love.

OP, go home and build your marriage, show that lady love and stop crying for nothing. You want to mess the young woman's life.
E no go work for you.

You didn't need to quote me in order to give your own advice. Rage comes actually from an accumulation of past and present resentments unattended to. You'd be surprised to know that 85% of spousal murder-suicide started softly like this. I'm all for everyone having peace and sleeping well at night. Wait, do you think a woman would thrive well in a house she's not loved and wanted?
I don't understand what you mean by mess the young woman's life... Kindly explain this.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Erastuslove: 8:55am On Jul 07, 2020

What attracted you to her in the first place? GO AND LOOK FOR THAT THING AGAIN AND TRACE YOUR STEP GRADUALLY WORK ON IT....

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Bbbwings: 8:56am On Jul 07, 2020

bukatyne:
Brother Ollins,

If this lady is as terrible as this, how were you able to get an erection to stick it into her?

How did you start the toasting to get her into your bed and arms?

The same magic you worked to get her pregnant, use it again.

It is in you like peak!

Mad people everywhere grin

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by ImaIma1(f): 9:00am On Jul 07, 2020

Dextre:
Cos men don't attach emotions to sex. Sex is just sex for men,a form of exercise, that's all.

I pray the exercise keeps the OP's marriage fit.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by SexytorresE(f): 9:03am On Jul 07, 2020

Didn’t u read and understand what he wrote? Or is mine that u understood? He said he doesn’t love her and she has opposite character of what he wants in a woman . U want him to die in there? lipsrsealed

Taniaa:
Which one is away match, that's bad advice. Op try to make your marriage work by communicating with your wife cause it seems to me like you're not making much attempt to make the whole thing work cause your mind was never in it from the beginning.
So either try to make it work or save you both from further emotional trauma by
filing for a divorce

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by ImaIma1(f): 9:04am On Jul 07, 2020

mozele:
I guess that's what ladies seem not to understand about we guys.

you see ehn, lust has always been one of the killers of men...

when a man is lustfully chasing after a woman to have a taste of what lies in-between her ties, his thinking faculty litrarily shuts down.

Whatever visible faults either in physique or character becomes totally nonexistent and unnecessary.

if men could rape a 3 month old baby, 82year-old grandma, or a mad woman down the street, why do you think he can't get intimate with someone he can't stand?

it's was never done in his right senses. when you are led by lust, these are the results you'll often get.

This is one reason I do ask God for the grace to overcome the spirit of lust in my daily prayers. It's not easy!

I understand this perfectly. Men are visual. But whether or not they are in their right senses, they thought it over and decided to go ahead with it, damning the consequences. So whatever eventualities come, they have to take it well. Because the men that decide to resist and use their head instead of their genitals don't have 4 heads.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by chubinwa(m): 9:10am On Jul 07, 2020

Divorce the marriage legally and settle down with the person you will love. Because no matter how hard you try, you will never love her.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by dona2us(m): 9:23am On Jul 07, 2020

Brother so sorry but you see, this cross eeh na you give yourself oh so you must live with it abi you never hear say anything you dont it you should never smell? My friend you see you have tasted the three minute enjoyment and the friut is out so enjoy while it last

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Arkmanbuddy(m): 9:27am On Jul 07, 2020

bukatyne:
Brother Ollins,

If this lady is as terrible as this, how were you able to get an erection to stick it into her?

How did you start the toasting to get her into your bed and arms?

The same magic you worked to get her pregnant, use it again.

It is in you like peak!

Oohhh!! Bukatyne is on fire!

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Preciouschinwe(f): 9:28am On Jul 07, 2020

franchasng:
Forget love, there is nothing like romantic love, the truth is, she is not your spec when it comes to physical beauty.

But I want to advice you as a guy that married one of the most beautiful career lady with amazing character who happened to be my friend before we married.

Brother, after few years of marriage or even few months, your wife's body will not be tempting and inviting to you like before when you first met her.

So its not about love or anything, it is how most if not all men are wired, but men love to tell lies to women and to themselves to make them feel good, they will pretend like their wife is still appealing to them like when they first met, na lie!!

Marriage is not about sex or romance, don't let people deceive you with their lies of how they still have sex or romance with their partners na lie!!

After few years of marriage, most marriages no longer rely on sex, couple might go months without sex no matter how sexy the wife maybe, its normal for most exposed and balling men not to feel the urge again because if your game is tight as a man, you easily get bored of things - be it food, woman, etc....u get tired of one thing too easily, unless your game is not tight then u stick to one thing out of no choice.

Haven't you wondered why almost all rich men have mistresses and concubines Haven't you ever wondered why Bible said it will be easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven Women matter is one of the reasons.

What am I saying

Even if u married your dream woman like me, believe me, u wouldn't have been fvcking her every now and then like u feel right now, u will be bored of her, she would be naked and u won't feel anything.

What will keep u guys going are your lovely kids, your life goals; financial goals being chased together and met, projects, career and business growth targets and discussions.

Only poor people sustain their marriage with sex! Reason they make too many babies!!

Only poor men fvck their wife everyday or every week because they have no other job or option....that their ekuke mgbeke wife they see everyday is their only diamond, they don't travel much to see sexy supermodels, so their wife remains their supermodel that once they see her they spread her legs like Aboki mat

Focus on your life goals, help your wife develop a career path or a business or sellable handwork and start planning and executing together action plans to help her grow in her career or business or handwork and you will begin to cherish her.

Remove your mind from sex. Even if u married Kim Kardashian, u will still get tired of fvcking her and will most likely cheat on her with one village chick or lower class girl, that's how men are.

[b][/b]If you feel the urge to fvck, u are free to get a mistress that meets your sexual and physical spec but make sure u are buoyant financially.

you go fear advice now, na wa oo

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by Maobichek: 9:35am On Jul 07, 2020

bukatyne:
Brother Ollins,

If this lady is as terrible as this, how were you able to get an erection to stick it into her?

How did you start the toasting to get her into your bed and arms?

The same magic you worked to get her pregnant, use it again.

It is in you like peak!

. God bless you, I Wonder why some "men" are not real men, he enjoyed her while sleeping with her but now asking if he could live all his life with her. My opinion is that he must live with her since he first reasoned with his penis and not his head.

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by DammyGbade(m): 9:43am On Jul 07, 2020

By the time you give birth to your fifth child, you'll love her and cherish her the more... Though it seems as if you're regretting your actions now, but later you'll be celebrating her... Each child comes with his/her own blessing, the one with the blessing bof mutual love and respect is coming forth... Man, it's your agbelebu continue to carry am...

Re: How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? by ninocia18(m): 9:43am On Jul 07, 2020

Ningen:
You only live once man. Don't waste it.

You don't have to cope, grow old and die in a loveless marriage, when you can divorce each other and move towards a very happy life.

Staying for your child??

He will do better with happy parents!
Regardless if the parents are together or apart.

I don't blame you sha. You don't know what it means to grow up in a home that isn't yours or a broken home. That's why you can come and talk rubbish. Try plucking a mango and planting it on an apple tree. Don't just coman be saying things you know nothing about.

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