₦airaland Forum

Personally to me, no biggie in it, it's no issue, it's insecurity to even think of suspecting your partner especially when you're married, trust level should be beyond such parochial thoughts. I have a very close married female friend, that we even video call each other, a very good friend that her hubby and I get along well.

Slawormir:
Damnnnnn niggarrr
Isoright
Not really a problem sha if your husband or wife have a close friend of the opposite sex

But just that most women can abuse it anyday anytime twice on the day they are emotionally traumatized or rather when they have little or financial problems in thier marriage

Because most times when women are facing little problem and emotional issues they tend to be vulnerable and quickly find comfort, solace and consolation from that close friend.....and as a result they can easily succumb to sexual advances from that male friend

Damnnn niggarrr....

you made a point from that your weed head

mariahAngel:
No dey fall hand!

Mariah you're not ignoring me again, thank God

Spouses who don't have opposite sex friends tend to cheat more in marriage when the opportunity arises because they are not used to that

Romangalactic:
Mariah you're not ignoring me again, thank God

I can't watch and let you make a joke of yourself na...
You know say you be my padi

GboyegaD:
It is people like you whose wife's brings Bayard to because all you think and see in a woman is sex. Oga, go get a life and focus.

If u get life you won't be talking like woman rapper, ......u re nairaland family now, go and learn about simp"

abysirius:
Hi Nairalanders,

Greetings to everyone in the house. Trust we are all enjoying the weekend. As regards to the above-mentioned subject. What is your take on this? Would u allow your partner have a close friend that is of opposite sex? Briefly give your reason (s) and state what you believe should be the ideal arrangement in a family setting.

I was listening to a program on the radio earlier this morning on Raypower FM before power outage. However, I have to put it on this platform out of curiosity to know how we feel about it. Personally, it is a capital NO for me. But of course, one of the 2 callers that called in before power cut termed it as insecurity as nothing seems to be wrong with the idea. Do you agree?

Mod pls help push this to the front page. Thanks.

No

LuvsBeautifl:
This is a long read but it should help. Copied from Facebook
SEXUAL LIMIT

Sexual immorality is on the increase all over the world. Adultery is fast becoming the norm and men of God are also joining the club. Married women are not left out, many are having secret lovers and emotional affairs are becoming the order of the day.
The rate at which immorality is increasing is alarming! It is spreading fast into every nook and cranny and children are also being initiated into the club. It's no news that 10, 13 years old kids now have sex with each other. Staying sexually pure these days is becoming a Herculean task.
One of the reasons people fall flat into illicit sex is over confidence. The belief that you can be free around the opposite sex and nothing would happen!
A lot will happen! One of the ways you can stay sexually pure whether married or single these end time is to set strict boundaries. If you are too careless around the opposite sex, you will fall flat on your face! That is the truth. The ealier you believe this and work on it, the better. You can't be careless around the opposite sex and hope to stay sexually pure, set boundaries!
There are some people who can't be your friends, raise the standard. Any body can call you names, that's their headache, you have your destiny to protect. As a rule, I don't make friends with liars, gossips and jealous people. They make life so complicated. If you believe in illicit sex, we can't be friends, period!
Monitor your chats. Don't allow anybody send you flirty messages, no matter how innocent it sounds, warn them and if they refuse to stop, block them!
Limit the hugs and touches. If your hugging anointing is only for me, I want none of it.
Don't allow anybody call you pet names (except your close family members and same sex friends), it doesn't make any sense. Pet names turn the opposite on, if you don't know that, know it right now.
Be sensitive to attractions. Don't be naive around the opposte sex, know when a man/ woman is sexually attracted to you and move back from that person. If they focus much on your physique and body, they are sexually attracted to you, move back.
Know when you are sexually attracted to someone and move back. It's perfectly normal to have chemistry for someone. Marrying the greatest man on earth or the most beautiful, virtous woman in the universe will not automatically stop you from being attracted to someone else. Know when the thought of another man/ woman get you excited and move back.
Don't jump at new relationships. Give it time. Study the person, know what they stand for, see if your core values are compatible, if not, move back!
Leadership attracts all kinds of people. If you are a leader or you are gifted, talented or intelligent, the opposite sex will show more interest in you, be careful whom you allow to get close to you.
Accepts gifts with care. Men don't joke with their time and money. If he spends so much time and money on you especially when you do not ask, he may one day ask for sex. Stop begging men for money. Work with your two hands and raise your standard. Men will respect and honour you for it.
Work on your marriage. Fix the problem as soon as possible or else you get attracted to someone who gives you what you lack in your marriage, adultery is the result.
Be prayerful, be watchful. ..."
Don't stay with the opposite sex in a dark or lonely room.
Don't counsel the opposite sex on a bed in a lonely room.
Avoid provocative dresses and pictures. Let your spouse or parents advise you on what is okay for you.
Mind the pictures you post on the social media, if it is getting unnecessary opposite sex attention, delete it.
Don't visit the opposite sex alone, especially at night. It doesn't make sense.
These and more are the things you need to do to stay sexually pure in this 21st century.
People may laugh at you, it doesn't matter. They may call you a neurotic, psychotic, fanatic, over sensitive or paranoid, don't give a damn! Your destiny is too precious to waste on the altar of sin. Avoid friends who make fun of holiness and make friends with people who appreciate purity and holiness.
Finally, avoid the second look, as far as possible. I agree perfectly with Job on his resolution never to look lustfully at any lady. Yes, you can avoid the second look.

*Set your boundaries and never allow anyone to compromise your holiness or piety .*

Advice from a friend.

Wish i could like this a billion times over

abysirius:
Hi Nairalanders,

Greetings to everyone in the house. Trust we are all enjoying the weekend. As regards to the above-mentioned subject. What is your take on this? Would u allow your partner have a close friend that is of opposite sex? Briefly give your reason (s) and state what you believe should be the ideal arrangement in a family setting.

I was listening to a program on the radio earlier this morning on Raypower FM before power outage. However, I have to put it on this platform out of curiosity to know how we feel about it. Personally, it is a capital NO for me. But of course, one of the 2 callers that called in before power cut termed it as insecurity as nothing seems to be wrong with the idea. Do you agree?

Mod pls help push this to the front page. Thanks.

Even if am very close to a female, the day she marries ,that closeness will drastically reduce to over 80%

abysirius:
As regards to the above-mentioned subject. What is your take on this? Would u allow your partner have a close friend that is of opposite sex? Briefly give your reason (s) and state what you believe should be the ideal arrangement in a family setting.

40 marks, Compulsory question!

ojuu4u:
If u get life you won't be talking like woman rapper, ......u re nairaland family now, go and learn about simp"

People that have good lives ahead of them don't shout the redpill like you. It is in the act and they respect women. Take your time to learn more instead of finding people to join in your misery.

LuvsBeautifl:
This is a long read but it should help. Copied from Facebook
SEXUAL LIMIT

Sexual immorality is on the increase all over the world. Adultery is fast becoming the norm and men of God are also joining the club. Married women are not left out, many are having secret lovers and emotional affairs are becoming the order of the day.
The rate at which immorality is increasing is alarming! It is spreading fast into every nook and cranny and children are also being initiated into the club. It's no news that 10, 13 years old kids now have sex with each other. Staying sexually pure these days is becoming a Herculean task.
One of the reasons people fall flat into illicit sex is over confidence. The belief that you can be free around the opposite sex and nothing would happen!
A lot will happen! One of the ways you can stay sexually pure whether married or single these end time is to set strict boundaries. If you are too careless around the opposite sex, you will fall flat on your face! That is the truth. The ealier you believe this and work on it, the better. You can't be careless around the opposite sex and hope to stay sexually pure, set boundaries!
There are some people who can't be your friends, raise the standard. Any body can call you names, that's their headache, you have your destiny to protect. As a rule, I don't make friends with liars, gossips and jealous people. They make life so complicated. If you believe in illicit sex, we can't be friends, period!
Monitor your chats. Don't allow anybody send you flirty messages, no matter how innocent it sounds, warn them and if they refuse to stop, block them!
Limit the hugs and touches. If your hugging anointing is only for me, I want none of it.
Don't allow anybody call you pet names (except your close family members and same sex friends), it doesn't make any sense. Pet names turn the opposite on, if you don't know that, know it right now.
Be sensitive to attractions. Don't be naive around the opposte sex, know when a man/ woman is sexually attracted to you and move back from that person. If they focus much on your physique and body, they are sexually attracted to you, move back.
Know when you are sexually attracted to someone and move back. It's perfectly normal to have chemistry for someone. Marrying the greatest man on earth or the most beautiful, virtous woman in the universe will not automatically stop you from being attracted to someone else. Know when the thought of another man/ woman get you excited and move back.
Don't jump at new relationships. Give it time. Study the person, know what they stand for, see if your core values are compatible, if not, move back!
Leadership attracts all kinds of people. If you are a leader or you are gifted, talented or intelligent, the opposite sex will show more interest in you, be careful whom you allow to get close to you.
Accepts gifts with care. Men don't joke with their time and money. If he spends so much time and money on you especially when you do not ask, he may one day ask for sex. Stop begging men for money. Work with your two hands and raise your standard. Men will respect and honour you for it.
Work on your marriage. Fix the problem as soon as possible or else you get attracted to someone who gives you what you lack in your marriage, adultery is the result.
Be prayerful, be watchful. ..."
Don't stay with the opposite sex in a dark or lonely room.
Don't counsel the opposite sex on a bed in a lonely room.
Avoid provocative dresses and pictures. Let your spouse or parents advise you on what is okay for you.
Mind the pictures you post on the social media, if it is getting unnecessary opposite sex attention, delete it.
Don't visit the opposite sex alone, especially at night. It doesn't make sense.
These and more are the things you need to do to stay sexually pure in this 21st century.
People may laugh at you, it doesn't matter. They may call you a neurotic, psychotic, fanatic, over sensitive or paranoid, don't give a damn! Your destiny is too precious to waste on the altar of sin. Avoid friends who make fun of holiness and make friends with people who appreciate purity and holiness.
Finally, avoid the second look, as far as possible. I agree perfectly with Job on his resolution never to look lustfully at any lady. Yes, you can avoid the second look.

*Set your boundaries and never allow anyone to compromise your holiness or piety .*

Advice from a friend.

You're the definition of straightforward and uprightness!

frozen70:
There is no way people in marriage will stay away from being friends with the opposite sex

Unless as a woman you are a full time house wife and doesn't have any reason to go out beyond food market

It all depends on self discipline

If a woman is happily married and the husband loves her, she wouldn't have a good thinking towards having opposite friends as to keep them and talk adult talks which normally results to and end up dating

As for men, they have an oat to cheat by default, even when he is married to the most beautiful and loyal wife. So men's case is just a different thing

They go as far as approaching a pregnant woman and assure her that he will wait when she puts to he

In this topic, the problem here are the men, they can't just stop lusting on women, ring or no ring

I didn't know you have met all the men in this world, to know that they have an "oat to cheat by default"

oluikotun:
Do you have a female friends even as you are marry to your wife? If you do then you are not been sincere.

have very few and de not dt close..

tumababa:
Not even old secondary/university class mates in whatsapp groups?

nooooo because they aint needed except its strictly business...

dodelight:
It's more of what works for you as a couple. My wife has male colleagues who are close friends with her and I don't feel threatened by them; she knows her limit. When our first child was delivered through CS, the first pap she would take was brought by my own close female friend (someone I intended to marry years back) who now happened to be a nurse in the ward, and she was there for my wife till discharge. When there was a problem at the early stage of the pregnancy, it was that same friend of mine that made sure my wife was attended to on time by calling the doctor at the emergency (UCH, Ibadan) and claiming my wife is her inlaw. I don't like to be caged, so I don't cage my wife. We know how far we can go, and we live our lives with God's grace.

U are never a marlian

I actually do not see anything wrong keeping opposite sexes as friends but there must be boundaries. However, making an opposite sex a bestie is a No No for me. I have a female friend despite we both being married and my wife does not see anything wrong in it because we discuss about her sometimes. It's a matter of understanding.

abysirius:
Hi Nairalanders,

Greetings to everyone in the house. Trust we are all enjoying the weekend. As regards to the above-mentioned subject. What is your take on this? Would u allow your partner have a close friend that is of opposite sex? Briefly give your reason (s) and state what you believe should be the ideal arrangement in a family setting.

I was listening to a program on the radio earlier this morning on Raypower FM before power outage. However, I have to put it on this platform out of curiosity to know how we feel about it. Personally, it is a capital NO for me. But of course, one of the 2 callers that called in before power cut termed it as insecurity as nothing seems to be wrong with the idea. Do you agree?

Mod pls help push this to the front page. Thanks.

Heeeerrr


Pant go shift ooooo

.

dodelight:
It's more of what works for you as a couple. My wife has male colleagues who are close friends with her and I don't feel threatened by them; she knows her limit. When our first child was delivered through CS, the first pap she would take was brought by my own close female friend (someone I intended to marry years back) who now happened to be a nurse in the ward, and she was there for my wife till discharge. When there was a problem at the early stage of the pregnancy, it was that same friend of mine that made sure my wife was attended to on time by calling the doctor at the emergency (UCH, Ibadan) and claiming my wife is her inlaw. I don't like to be caged, so I don't cage my wife. We know how far we can go, and we live our lives with God's grace.

My wife has a male friends with their families that have slept in my house when on vacations. I have also entertained female friends sleeping in our house as well when they came on vacation.

GboyegaD:
People that have good lives ahead of them don't shout the redpill like you. It is in the act and they respect women. Take your time to learn more instead of finding people to join in your misery.

Bastard kid u re taken care will cut off ur head one day!!!

Bible says flee from temptation, not run but flee.

ojuu4u:
Bastard kid u re taken care will cut off ur head one day!!!

Oga, go focus on your own kids na, abi?

[s]

sunshineV:
She'll still get the D from an outsider. Marry at ur own peril

[/s]

is not advisable, it bring insecurity to marriage like what am facing now.

This topic is related to being friends with one's ex.
*******
Some people claim they are still best of friends with a certain ‘ex’ and that explains why some men would rather go to an ‘ex’ girlfriend for advice and even confiding (what they would never dream of sharing with their ‘better half’) in such ‘ex.’ There are also women who run to their ‘ex’ at the drop of a hat for assistance or when they need to talk to someone. The argument is that such ’ex’ understands them better than any other person and has therefore remained an important fixture in their lives, making me ask, is anybody really comfortable with a spouse’s ‘ex’ in the picture-deep down? Whatever happens to those we call friends-if one needs to ‘talk to somebody’ has to suddenly revolve around an ‘ex’? Isn’t it easier for the ‘ex’ (with whom the centre could not hold) to ‘understand’ because he/she isn’t in your spouse’s shoes?
I am not even going to look at this issue from the angle of ‘Okafor’s law’ but what I do know is this…if at any stage in your supposed marital life, you still find yourself running to an ‘ex’ when you need to talk to somebody, something is fundamentally wrong in that marriage! No ‘ex’ should be closer than your spouse to you. The moment you chose to move on with your ‘new life,’ every ‘ex’ should cease to play an important role in your life because these are the people that belong to your past. Again, if your ‘ex’ was that wonderful, why did you not end up (in matrimony) with him/her?
I think we should watch our penchant for wanting to eat our cake and have it. If a certain ‘ex’ has to be elevated in your life, above your ‘better half,’ there is an urgent need to renegotiate the basis of that union. It’s ‘ok’ to relate with an ‘ex’ as cordially as you can but lines should be drawn in how you carry on with such ‘closeness’ simply because you have someone else in your life (now), who should naturally be closer to you than any and every ‘ex’ put together. Don’t insult your partner’s sensibilities through careless conducts.
If you must relate with an ‘ex,’ please carry your spouse along. Show some dignity. Let me say this again, if at any point in your marital life, you suddenly find yourself running to an ‘ex’ whenever you need a shoulder to cry on, I put it to you that something is wrong with the setting you call a marriage. Your partner (first and foremost), friends or family should be those you run to at such ‘periods.’ An ‘ex’ should not even be in the equation because you both have supposedly moved on.
Your partner should make you forget most things about any ‘ex.’ I mean whatever wonderful attributes such ‘ex’ possesses should pale into insignificance compared to what you are currently enjoying. If this is not what obtains with your reality, it won’t be out of order to question your judgement.
The moment you have chosen to bring someone else into your life, please spare them the episode of your ‘ex’ except you are regretting the ‘setting’ that you ended up with!

God forbid bad thing!!
What happened to me?
Have you forgotten the street saying that says "body no be fire wood"

Louisananda7:
As a popular philosopher once said "man know thy self".

I concur.

Thane:
How much to get this

Depends on your load and your budget.

For a 2 bedroom or 3 bedroom apartment, I will suggest the following.

3.5 kva hybrid 24v inverter 90k
2 pieces of 200 AH lead acid battery 70k each total 140k
3 pieces of 300 watts 24volts solar panels at 45k each total 135k

Total amount 365k

Cable, changeover switch, solar panels stand and workmanship 125k

Total 490k.

Solar panels is designed to last for 20 years
Inverter should last 10 years
Batteries will last 3 years.

Male colleagues lol, be saving money for DNA test okay because e go happen. I guess you're trying to feel civilized and all, probably showing how you're more like Oyibo haha but e go shock you!

dodelight:
It's more of what works for you as a couple. My wife has male colleagues who are close friends with her and I don't feel threatened by them; she knows her limit. When our first child was delivered through CS, the first pap she would take was brought by my own close female friend (someone I intended to marry years back) who now happened to be a nurse in the ward, and she was there for my wife till discharge. When there was a problem at the early stage of the pregnancy, it was that same friend of mine that made sure my wife was attended to on time by calling the doctor at the emergency (UCH, Ibadan) and claiming my wife is her inlaw. I don't like to be caged, so I don't cage my wife. We know how far we can go, and we live our lives with God's grace.

I don't see anything wrong with that, but u must define the relationship wr and what to do per time. Don't always be together at closed doors because davil is a wayorist and conji is a bastard.

Slawormir:
Damnnnnn niggarrr
Isoright
Not really a problem sha if your husband or wife have a close friend of the opposite sex

But just that most women can abuse it anyday anytime twice on the day they are emotionally traumatized or rather when they have little or financial problems in thier marriage

Because most times when women are facing little problem and emotional issues they tend to be vulnerable and quickly find comfort, solace and consolation from that close friend.....and as a result they can easily succumb to sexual advances from that male friend

this is the first time you make a very good comments instead of Ur 'damn nigarrr isoright' one big bottle for you this evening