₦airaland Forum

DavidEsq:
OP I take God beg u, I open this thread this morning for inside court and I wan die of laf. Abeg before judge

Man, it's really a true life story. Words couldn't explain it better.

MrOjay1:
Ah bros
e be like you want make i begin dance

abeg do for me if you fit abeg oo

Shey make i send my aza?

You can send. Shey your account no dey on minus sha? Na just breakfast money o, just sharing what I have.

biggy26:
You can send. Shey your account no dey on minus sha? Na just breakfast money o, just sharing what I have.

Thank you bros
any amount you send go dey ok for me


2080372923
UBA

biggy26:
You can send. Shey your account no dey on minus sha? Na just breakfast money o, just sharing what I have.

Thanks bros
I really appreciate.
Make i go mama obi canteen go knack better fufu with egusi and odu azu

Dbarrzx:
From Law Falculty? my guy na like 10min to 15min trecking oooo

To walk from Art or Law Faculty down to School Gate far sha ...no be lie

Ishilove:
Morning.

I wasn't feeling well and my mum gave me malaria medication, but since she is a believer of trado-African medicine, she decided to add agbo to it for 'more effect.' I washed everything down with fufu and egusi soup.

There after i packed my bags and returned to school. We had gotten to Onipanu when my stomach began to rumble. I was overwhelmed by nausea.

"Stop the bus!" I croaked to the conductor. He ignored me

"I say stop th...," but before I could complete the sentence, I vomited all over everyone. It was so humiliating.

The conductor had to get a broom and packer to sweep the undigested lumps of fufu from the floor of the bus.

Funny enough I felt better after vomiting. When I got to my hostel I called my mum and related the aftermath of her 'explosive' medical combination, and she assured me that going forward, she will never mix 'ogu oyibo' with agbo, ever again.

Ishi, may I mail you please?

benicta:
The second one was in my final year in secondary school. That was how my dad decided to use one old car to drop me in school. The fact that the car was old wasn't the problem. The problem was that my dad had to connect wires from the bonnet and placed the battery in front seat right where I was sitting. I still don't know why he had to connect wires from the bonnet into the car. That day I was sha praying not to be seen by any of my mates but as God would have it, there was fee drive that day and all students were in front of the gate, waiting to be checked in. As a result of that, I wasn't only seen by my classmates but the entire students as well. I just bone face join queue that day.

Lol I can relate.. back then in boarding school too my friends always made fun of me coz my papa car na kabu kabu. Most times when my dad say make e go drop me I was usually ashamed. Life sha

Lordspicy:
It was during Anat 311 exams, the hall was packed full cos they combined 2 departments. The dean, Hods of the two departments and several lecturers were in the hall supervising.
The dean ordered the lecturers to search the students for mobile phones.
When it got to my turn, the lecturer noticed a bulge in my trousers and asked me what it was and I said it was my wallet.
Omo na so this man demand for the wallet and I willing gave it to him, rifling through the wallet he saw one trojan condom that I left in the wallet. He asked me what it was and I was like “see this medical doctor way Dey ask me wetin be condom oo”. I boldly replied that it was a condom, he yelled to the dean that I had the guts to come to an important exam with a condom. The whole hall turned and started staring, the dean told me to come forward to the front of the hall and I bounced boldly over.
He asked whether I had a pu$$i appointment after the exams or whether I was coming from one and I said no. He complained about how spoilt our generation was while I stood at the front of the hall in front of almost 2000 eyes.
He seized my wallet and told me to go back to my seat. I jejely bounce back, after exams I still go him office collect my wallet with my condom join.

Where did this happen?

ymstar:
Ishi, may I mail you please?

Go ahead.

When I trekked from Olunlade (Ilorin) to PS UNILORIN. I couldn't feel my legs for nearly 2 weeks. How do people manage to survive travelling back in the days when there were no vehicles?

Ishilove:
Go ahead.

Ok, thanks

MrOjay1:
Thanks bros
I really appreciate.
Make i go mama obi canteen go knack better fufu with egusi and odu azu

Okay boss. Enjoy!

restore8:
the day wey woman beat me eh... Chai

Onucs:
this happened to my friend.

In 300L, we were attending a lecture and it got to question & answer time. The lecturer asked for who can solve a particular question on the board. myself and my crew though brilliant, the question got us confused. There is this Comrade mate of mine who lives for moments like these (the sabi sabi type). As usual, he threw his hand up and was asked to come solve it on the board. He walked up to the Board with so much enthusiasm feeling like a professor. it was when he got to the board that he realized that the problem was bigger than his intellectual scope. the whole class let out a thunderous laughter as he fumbled. the nigga was so embarrassed. The whole class became awfully quiet at the lecturer's directive when he told the comrade to give the marker to anyone of he choice to come and solve the problem. Shockingly the guy walked to the back end of the class where we (myself and two of my friends) were seated and handed the marker to my scholar friend with the whole class staring. my guy was so shocked. he knew he was also going to fumble should he attempt to go and solve the problem. Before i could say jack robinson, he threw the marker in my hands with a defensive look on his face, one would his thought was "why are you all staring? i can't solve it and so?". to cut the whole story short, i got to the board and solve it correctly.

Wow

DavidEsq:
OP I take God beg u, I open this thread this morning for inside court and I wan die of laf. Abeg before judge

The law, but I thought they have not opened court nah

biggy26:
You can send. Shey your account no dey on minus sha? Na just breakfast money o, just sharing what I have.

God bless you

ymstar:
The law, but I thought they have not opened court nah

Since May 4th I have been going to court

ymstar:
God bless you

Amen!

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biggy26:
You can send. Shey your account no dey on minus sha? Na just breakfast money o, just sharing what I have.

Make I also send my aza bro? I just wan send to am sb who needs it more than me as I don't have. Any amount is bae.

TissuePaper:
Well as an upcoming artiste I registered to perform at my University carnival. I was a very shy introvert so I decided to take some substances so as to gain confidence to perform in front of the crowd. Voila my time came and I was called on stage. What really happened I still can't remember all I know was that I started seeing stones, corn Hobbs(shuku agbado), bottle being thrown at me. The M.C just came to put his arm around me and walked me off the stage politely. How I didn't commit suicide that day I don't know. The most painful part was a girl that I was about to knack that was there. The girl said she saw someone that looks like me on stage. Me wey I be ode instead of me to deny I said yes na so she block me ooo. My only chance of getting laid at the University. 3 years after University at 25 am still a virgin na wa oo.

Bhaajhahahahhaahahaahahahaahahaahajhahhajaajahahhahaha

NewDelhi:
Where did this happen?

Med school.

Lordspicy:
Med school.

Where?

obadisa:
It was during my 2nd year in a new school (ICHS Afromedia). I use to be very shy then.

Our English teacher (Mr Victor) was feared by almost all the students.

He gave us an assignment over the weekend to write a composition about (My Mother's kitchen). We stay in a rented face me and face you apartment back then, I did the assignment truthfully, leaving nothing behind. With the hope that he will read through the composition by himself.

On a cold Monday morning, towards the end of his class, He called me out to read my composition to the hearings of my class mates, God... I was dumbfounded and went out sluggishly, I was just repeating the words "My mother's kitchen" over and over again, rubbing my jaw that has no string of hair on it.

All thanks to the time keeper who rang the bell for end of class.

My Alma Mata

darfay:
My Alma Mata

Lmao.... A global village!

Which set?

chioma8:
As a fresher then, was going for night class with my friend, we first went to my faculty and the hall was full. so, my friend said we should go to pharmacy dept...... as we're approaching Bello hostel which was direct opposite pharmacy dept, they were group of guys in front of us, we walked passed them cos we were in a hurry, didn't even see the big gutter that was very close to me, as I took my next step naso I find myself inside the gutter, my friend tried to pull me out but she couldn't, those guys laughed and yab me eeeh before they came to my rescue .....felt so embarrassed, the school lights were on and was injured...... that was my worse day in school........

Lioness spotted

obadisa:
Lmao.... A global village!

Which set?

Lol
I rather not abeg but you fit be my senior Sha

Wierdceo:
Pussy ass nigga

you're funny.

kiddkash:
1. I wasn't exactly shy, then but in JSS 3 I winked at a class mate of mine.
when she came, smiling and asked if it was her I winked at, I was so shy and out of sorts, I said no it was someone behind her
she was pretty and I don't really know how to maintain eye contact. I still don't know how to maintain eye contact

2. people in my class in SS3 use to mess(fart) a lot because of the food we were given as we were all boarders.
I tried doing mine slowly when my school principal came to my class, I didn't know when water water shit commot.

3. when I was in CEDEC, kudaisi street. I asked my class teacher to go out to urinate, she refused, saying I should go and sit down
within seconds, I urinated on my body then the teacher told me to go out.
I couldn't go back to class that day.

You attended CEDEC. That's cool.

What year did you pass out from CEDEC Primary school, maybe I might have known you?

I hate our school sport wears, de tin too dey somehow . I no dey wear am naso God catch me.

One day, i just say make i wear am go school, naso konji hold me , my tin kon strong like say na iron rod. The tin dey show well for my trouser.

Nexdt tin , i hear na Ahmed come and clean the board, Oboy i wan die. I just use shame carry myself go clean board, I konw put my second hand inside pocket.

I nearly wan die

paulolee:
the day my j.w prof catch me for inside bush for skul dey weed..
i pleaded and he forgived me and promised to keep it to himself but i do feel asif i killed somebody whenever he is lecturing with the way he stares at me and never ask me question in class
i jus pray he doesn't endup being my project supervisor during my finals....na to join j.w be that oo

He has forgiven u. Sin no more child

vickysly:
Lioness spotted

yes oooo