Life is full of people with good and super qualities .even when you marry,u will meet people who are more handsome ,richer ,more beautiful than your spouse or hubby .but you got to know ,not everyone is made for you .some people are in your life for different reasons .even men will meet Girls with super qualities than their GF .this does not mean ending a relationship or marriage because you met someone better .Appreciate the one you have ,people can fall in love and out of love any time ,so don't be decieved by feelings







ex

Favour2323:
Nairalanders, I'm about to do something my conscience doesn't agree with but it feels like the right decision to make. I have a boyfriend. We've been dating for the past 6 months. I love him. We were good friends before we started dating. I'm someone who doesn't trust easily and I like to assess a guy for a while before dating him. I assessed his intentions and I realised he didn't just want to have sex with me and leave. He loved me just as I loved him.

Three months ago I met this guy. At first I just saw him as a friend, but as I got to know him I started noticing the good qualities he possessed. He's very attractive, very intelligent and wellspoken. My conversations with him were so immersive. The little time I spent with him always left a profound impression on me. Soon I noticed I had started developing feelings for him. I was still in love with my boyfriend nevertheless.

One day the new guy asked me if I had a boyfriend. I told him I did. The next day he called me and said that he didn't want to interfere with my relationship. He said he had feelings for me and he couldn't remain friends with me when he knows I have a boyfriend. I told him that I had feelings for him as well and that we could still remain friends but he refused and suggested that we stopped talking. He hasn't called or texted me since that day.

This situation has left me in an emotional turmoil. This new guy represents everything I want in a guy and as much as I don't want to admit it, he possesses better qualities than my boyfriend. I can't imagine a life where I can't talk to him anymore. I really like him. His decision has left me in a dicey position. It's unfair to leave my boyfriend who has always been nice to me for someone else, but the new guy doesn't want to have anything to do with me again as long as I'm in a relationship.

Please I need advice. I don't want to make the wrong decision.

donstan18:
If you are a Guy reading this, please pay attention.



You see this?



You see this?


And this?


And this too....

You see those 4 parts I highlighted? They should be the reason why you should never expect much from GIRLFRIENDS, they are just hoes parading as Girlfriends. thanks man

The earlier you understand this the better for you. Thanks!!

thanks man

FluxEmpire:
I'd put things clear as apt as it is... If you say you love the second guy, then you never loved the first... You can't love two people at the same time; it's impossible.

If you wanna go for the second guy, then do so and stop using the first as leverage or collateral to keep whenever the new guy is unavailable.

Furthermore, you'd be doing more good than harm in leaving your first boyfriend because as it is, you clearly don't love him because love goes beyond what you just see physically. It's accepting one's shit and excesses and loving them for who they are.

Give your first boyfriend the respect he deserves by leaving him and stop loving him out of pity. You're only making him a lovelorn. If you actually knew that the new guy had all you needed in a man, courtesy states that you remain single till you get to meet such guy even if it takes 100 years but outta being lonely, you opted to date your first and now the man of your dreams appeared, the first seems to fade in your eyes...

YOU CLEARLY DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT

Give the first boyfriend the honor he deserves and let a woman who is worthy of him be with him. You can't eat your cake and have it. Next time, carry a TO-DO-LIST about your expectations with you henceforth because it seems if another guy should sweep you outta your feet better than the second, you might as well put the second in the corners.

I might have been rude but pardon my unfriendliness; the TRUTH hurts.

I love this meen

NkemChukwudi:


You don blow oooo, with the huge number of likes.

But how old are you?

Most marriages are hell on earth anyways but for the public pretence.

Well not most marriages but every marriage is hell, but u have to come together to fight for love. There is no already made relationship, u have to build it

Favour2323:


Please don't dissuade those that want to offer their opinions.
This is my story and it's not fake.

Your story is truth.
Let me tell you my personal story.
When I was a casual worker, I have a girlfriend. I spent most of the money on her, but when she discovered that I might not be able to cater for her upkeep, she started dating another guy secretly, I noticed, but I didn't tell her, because of my condition. I got a new job, I went to her house to tell her about my new job. I now met her new boyfriend in her house. I told her about the development. She told me that she would drop the guy as it's like I now serious. I met another lady, I remember what the old girl did to me. I have moved on with my new life and my new girlfriend. I forgot her patapata. In fact, she still called me this morning. When I'm preparing for wedding already.

Is it difficult for a successful man to get married??

Kokaine:
so how will you marry

Favour2323:
Nairalanders, I'm about to do something my conscience doesn't agree with but it feels like the right decision to make. I have a boyfriend. We've been dating for the past 6 months. I love him. We were good friends before we started dating. I'm someone who doesn't trust easily and I like to assess a guy for a while before dating him. I assessed his intentions and I realised he didn't just want to have sex with me and leave. He loved me just as I loved him.

Three months ago I met this guy. At first I just saw him as a friend, but as I got to know him I started noticing the good qualities he possessed. He's very attractive, very intelligent and wellspoken. My conversations with him were so immersive. The little time I spent with him always left a profound impression on me. Soon I noticed I had started developing feelings for him. I was still in love with my boyfriend nevertheless.

One day the new guy asked me if I had a boyfriend. I told him I did. The next day he called me and said that he didn't want to interfere with my relationship. He said he had feelings for me and he couldn't remain friends with me when he knows I have a boyfriend. I told him that I had feelings for him as well and that we could still remain friends but he refused and suggested that we stopped talking. He hasn't called or texted me since that day.

This situation has left me in an emotional turmoil. This new guy represents everything I want in a guy and as much as I don't want to admit it, he possesses better qualities than my boyfriend. I can't imagine a life where I can't talk to him anymore. I really like him. His decision has left me in a dicey position. It's unfair to leave my boyfriend who has always been nice to me for someone else, but the new guy doesn't want to have anything to do with me again as long as I'm in a relationship.

Please I need advice. I don't want to make the wrong decision.

This is what you hear from a typical Nigerian woman. When she gets used and then dumped, she would turn around and say men are scum.

After breaking up with your current boyfriend to to follow the latter, tomorrow you will see another person better you will jump. And jumping from one guy to another because of physical look becomes your hubby. You better think o.

En ehn! Before I forget please dont waste your current boyfriend’s time. Quickly make your decision and let him be.

After all this life na choice

The op doesn't know what she wants. What will she if she sees someone else with a better than this new guy? So she will move to the other guy? We must be content with what we have. In fact God will never give u everything in one person, because if He does u will feel no need of Him.

dukeprince50:

Well not most marriages but every marriage is hell, but u have to come together to fight for love. There is no already made relationship, u have to build it

Educate me please. Build it for what exactly?

Diligence4life:
The op doesn't know what she wants. What will she if she sees someone else with a better than this new guy? So she will move to the other guy? We must be content with what we have. In fact God will never give u everything in one person, because if He does u will feel no need of Him.

She's probably looking for a perfect guy. The person she invented. In the next couple of months, she will regret her actions. What these women don't realize is men have flaws too.

Excuses:



Ur advice holds no water...no matter what u give a woman she'll answer her call when the time comes
Secondly, why would u tell two partners in marriage to leave each other is it not for better for worst or are u a marriage councillor. what God has put together let no man put asunder.

Lastly in life u must always meet better people,better than others u've met before, in ur words is to keep changing for the best..no body is the best..

The word best is relative..u can make any woman or man ur best,others will grow to love & wish for them too.

read my comment again and you will see where I said the person should leave when he or she has done everything possible to move along with the person but to no avail

Favour2323:
Nairalanders, I'm about to do something my conscience doesn't agree with but it feels like the right decision to make. I have a boyfriend. We've been dating for the past 6 months. I love him. We were good friends before we started dating. I'm someone who doesn't trust easily and I like to assess a guy for a while before dating him. I assessed his intentions and I realised he didn't just want to have sex with me and leave. He loved me just as I loved him.

Three months ago I met this guy. At first I just saw him as a friend, but as I got to know him I started noticing the good qualities he possessed. He's very attractive, very intelligent and wellspoken. My conversations with him were so immersive. The little time I spent with him always left a profound impression on me. Soon I noticed I had started developing feelings for him. I was still in love with my boyfriend nevertheless.

One day the new guy asked me if I had a boyfriend. I told him I did. The next day he called me and said that he didn't want to interfere with my relationship. He said he had feelings for me and he couldn't remain friends with me when he knows I have a boyfriend. I told him that I had feelings for him as well and that we could still remain friends but he refused and suggested that we stopped talking. He hasn't called or texted me since that day.

This situation has left me in an emotional turmoil. This new guy represents everything I want in a guy and as much as I don't want to admit it, he possesses better qualities than my boyfriend. I can't imagine a life where I can't talk to him anymore. I really like him. His decision has left me in a dicey position. It's unfair to leave my boyfriend who has always been nice to me for someone else, but the new guy doesn't want to have anything to do with me again as long as I'm in a relationship.

Please I need advice. I don't want to make the wrong decision.

The truth of the matter is ; even if you leave the present guy for this new guy, you will still leave the new guy too someday. The reason is that you have a gene & nature that is not contended with whatever you have. If you don't watch it, that is how you will keep jumping from men to men till you become confused & used beyond repair.... Harsh but true

donstan18:


The earlier you understand this the better for you. Thanks!!

U deserve 10k likes for this.

To get the gist, replace quality with money

The truth is , you need to really work on yourself cos u can’t just be falling in love anyhow. Let’s assume u really ditch ur old bf and go for this new guy, when someone better comes, that’s how u will still fall in love anyhow with him cos he possess better qualities . You need to define what you really want in a relationship and also u should know that not all that glitters that is gold. Why do I have this feeling that this new guy just wants to Bleep You and go

[s]

gaius01:


well I understand your point let's talk this talk out of the basket. like you said no signs of abuse neither unfaithfulness. Do you know a girl could break up with you because of lack care, incompatibility, too boring and lots more. from what I can deduce her boyfriend ain't giving her the vibes the other was giving her can you imagine the qualities she listed. dam look at it again, and Las Las her boo is not cheating neither does he abuse her. when I was dating I never allow my chatting vibes to be low, I read alot of wide range so that when we start chatting men she won't have time texting those boys because I know if I don't occupy her with vibes others will

one problem with we Nigerians is that when our Bea is cheating, look at your self, take a deep scan through, ask your self, What makes that guy different from me not getting angry or shouting at her every body want a lively boo no one boring, faithful dude. learn new ways to be Romantic, learn her phycology so that you can inflict it for your sef. if she love your vibes trust me she woñt look out albeit you been faithful.

[/s]

MisterGrace:
When you said you love your boyfriend of 6 months, what do you mean by that?

Lol

as a young and growing man...dating a lady shouldn't always be ur priority. in life....hustle heard,get the money n u will command respect....love and respect are inseparable entity wen money nd good virtues is involved....

get a life
become independent
#relationship is a responsibility


Weldon. OP... UR NOT DOING WELL OO

Sixfeetbelle:


Let me not say what's on my mind.

no hard feelings

Yes, it is possible you might be having a niggling feeling for the new guy, but trust me it is not love. You have only seen his good side. Have you seen his bad side too?

Your present boyfriend has been with you through it all, so you know him, you know his strength and weaknesses. But then if you feel he's not what you need, pls do not deprive him of his emotions by using him as an option. Allow him go by telling him the truth. So he can find a better girl suited for him.

Meanwhile, I wish you best of luck in your newly found love as you claim. I hope you find true happiness.

Liposure:
no hard feelings

There's plenty hard feelings, however.

A Bleep nigga will always be a Bleep nigga. Why do men never acknowledge this?

[b][/b]These hoes ain't loyal gbam!!!! You spoke my mind

Kokaine:


Brother you're sounding so hurt. Your message almost looks personal like you've had an experience. Calm down o

Don't pity ladies that cheat. You need to reprimand them. Women will always take nice guys for fools. As a guy, don't think by handling a woman with care and love and being all that nice to them that will make them stay with you.

When your woman do something wrong, don't be too soft when reprimanding her. Women mistake niceness for weakness. Don't be a weak man when reprimanding a cheating woman.

it will end in premium tears

enuk80:
Bro, I like your assertion. You nailed the truth. Girls are the most confuse creature on earth. They don't really know what they want.

To be honest, I would disagree with your view about girls being the most confused creatures on earth.

I like to think they are very strategic in choice and positioning, most times seeking peeps they could take advantage of. My view has always been that, the average girl would hang on to a guy, in a relationship, enjoying all the benefits available, while looking around for that very person that ticks all/almost all of their boxes.

Should that prince appear, the unfortunate fellow in the subsisting relationship would be dumped in a manner inconceivable (the flimsiest of grounds or a heartless walkaway).

So when we tell guys to always ensure a live connection between their brains and hearts when in "love" and be gamble-aware (not staking more than you can conveniently afford to lose) in taking care of their babes, e get why!

dukeprince50:
dont go and make up ur mind, be here doing DELAYtionship and decamping from one man to the other every three months,
U think relationship is build on physical qualities? In life u will always find someone more attractive than the one u are currently dating, wen that time comes, emotional maturity will help u, self control will come to ur rescue and commitment will keep u going, u think happily married couples dont see better qualities, Relationship should not be build on qualities but understanding that commitment is ur greatest arsenal that destroy those unhelpful impulses if and wen it comes. u can fall in love with anyone, it takes little or no effort but building a relationship that could survive the test of time takes more than that, My dear, there is no already made relationship, u have to build one. but u are just 16yrs, u wont understand
dicey dice u there, Rubbish

I wanted to use bodmas to solve the matter but it's like this ur ALMIGHTY FORMULAR did justice to it.

dukeprince50:
dont go and make up ur mind, be here doing DELAYtionship and decamping from one man to the other every three months,
U think relationship is build on physical qualities? In life u will always find someone more attractive than the one u are currently dating, wen that time comes, emotional maturity will help u, self control will come to ur rescue and commitment will keep u going, u think happily married couples dont see better qualities, Relationship should not be build on qualities but understanding that commitment is ur greatest arsenal that destroy those unhelpful impulses if and wen it comes. u can fall in love with anyone, it takes little or no effort but building a relationship that could survive the test of time takes more than that, My dear, there is no already made relationship, u have to build one. but u are just 16yrs, u wont understand
dicey dice u there, Rubbish

Amazing response!

gaius01:
A very funny massive, aunty if the guy that's excetly what I will do. if you truly love him more than your boyfriend break up. if am dating you it's not a favour it's our will to stay together. I don't know why must Nigerians girls in molested relationship do stay because of a favour the guy has done. don't qoute me and not referring to you. mine was a game we are too play immediately I asked her about her relationship status, ,she's dating I lose interest cut any form of Chat with her I don't like sharing a person. if she truly love me then she can trade her relationship for me if not I won't talk to her, higest once in a while reason because my first intention was to date her and she's dating, well bye bye. unless I start a talk with her for friendship purpose.

Seriously, I don't understand your point. I'm serious, sorry bro, start all over please.

humilitypays:
A smart chick or lady don't need to tell her so called committed boyfriend that she is fvcking another guy or seeing another guy or considering another guy because we men are sexual hypocrites, we will judge and crucify such lady, she only needs to be smart, play smart and make the best decision to end up with the right man ready to wife her.


So many ladies were loyal to their so called husband they wished would marry them at the end the guy goes and marry one lady he met after a one night stand, so what do you have to say


Not all guys marry ladies they courted or dated for too long cos of see finish and it become boring too, many guys marry any sweet lady to them they meet when they are ready to settle down irrespective of how many guys she had dated in the past.


Ladies should learn to keep their mouth shut about the guys they are seeing cos men are hypocrites who judge them but refuse to subject themselves to judgment also.


How many sexually active guys here can swear that they have had sex with only their main girlfriend If they dare it, many go fall and die

But they want their girlfriends to keep herself only for them while they fvck around, whose girlfriend are they fvcking and chasing around like hegoat Maybe ghost


The world has evolved already beyond anybody's absolute control and beyond any gender's control so we men need to wake up to the reality that our girlfriends and fiancé's and even wives are also being fvcked codedly nowadays and there is nothing anybody can do about it, at worst you go to the monastery and turn to a Monk and face serving the Lord but if you want to date, do relationship and even marry, you must prepare your mind to take any boomshyyyyt that may come; bear in mind that your girlfriend, fiancé, or even wife may fall once in a while and get fvcked without you knowing and life goes on.



Making guys making noise here, if the table were turned and cute rich ladies start approaching guys for date, flings, etc, all the guys yanning dust here will be fvcked anyhow by these ladies if tables were turned so let's cut ladies some slack, they are humans.


Do you think it's easy for a pretty lady who is dating a guy that's struggling financially, not that handsome, nothing special to resist uncountable handsome looking guys with loads of cash, goodies and amazing profile Don't you know ladies too fantasize about their dream man, and when they come across such a man you think its that easy for them to resist him just because of one yeye boyfriend that she don't even know where the relationship is heading to


I have seen ladies who remained loyal and faithful to their so called boyfriend for years and at the end nothing good came out of the relationship

Have you watched the video I posted? Try and watch it and you will see why a ladies need to remain loyal in their relationships.

You can't compare a cheating man to a cheating woman. When a man cheats, he still loves his woman but when a woman cheats, she fall out of love with her man. That's why the society condemn cheating women because they are expected to stay loyal whenever they are in a serious relationship.

No sane man will leave a loyal woman to marry someone else. Unless they believe that the lady is not a faithful lady during their courtships. Just like what this girl is trying to do. These are the kind of things that will make the guy not to marry her if he planned of marrying her before. Do you think if the guy finds out, he will be happy?

The reason why most men leave their spouse to marry someone else is because they have noticed from the beginning that the lady is cheating but for some, they will never confront such a lady but rather majority of guys will convert such a lady to a side chick or a bleep buddy. They will keep bleeping tthat type of a girl and later dump her and marry a more faithful lady.

Why some guys will instantly dump a lady who is cheating, for others, they will still keep her for sex and dump her later. That's why when you heard that a guy left her girl to marry someone else, just know that the girl is a cheater.

That's why it always good for a lady to remain loyal in any serious relationship she is in.

If I catch my girlfriend cheating, I won't dump her if I know she can still serve as a bleep buddy. But within my heart, I know I won't marry such a girl because I find out she is cheating. That's the main reason some guys leave the girl they are dating to marry someone else.

Why will I marry a girl I know is cheating during courtship? It is the loyalty of a woman that make most men marry their women. If a woman is loyal, 70% of the issues in relationships are solved.

Now the question is will you marry a girl if u find out she is cheating when dating you or you will convert her to a bleep buddy and dish her when you are ready to settle down?

The bolded? If a guy ever leave a lady to marry another just know that the lady was cheating when the guy was dating her. That's the only reason a man will leave a lady to marry another. Don't let anyone tell you they never cheated.

Definitely such ladies will tell u they never cheated of course but the guy that dated such a lady knows he left her because she was not faithful during their relationship.

Do you now see why ladies should remain loyal in their relationships?

donstan18:
If you are a Guy reading this, please pay attention.



You see this?



You see this?


And this?


And this too....

You see those 4 parts I highlighted? They should be the reason why you should never expect much from GIRLFRIENDS, they are just hoes parading as Girlfriends.

The earlier you understand this the better for you. Thanks!!

you deserve some accolades bro

I will be frank with you. Its obvious you don't love your boyfriend but just having an ENTANGLEMENT with him out of PITY. PITY not LOVE is what your have towards your present boyfriend. Probably your boyfriend had stopped being an ALPHA male and slide into a too NICE Guy which is a feminine quality. A lady looses attraction for a guy when he becomes too nice, keeps in touch with her too often and stop placing value on himself. Obviously, your boyfriend has made you his world already and has placed so much value on you which is bad for any man, hence the reason you're loosing attraction for your boyfriend.
Now, you see this new guy, he is exhibiting his alpha traits that is why youre more attracted to him now than your boyfriend. Why should he be your friend when he wants more from you. He made the best decision as he doesnt want to be manipulated eventually and loose his alpha traits. He is a real person and has told himself the truth not minding if his decision will hurt you. He is not that nice guy and places so much value on himself instead of you. I will tell you a secret now as a guy, ATTRACTION GROWS IN SPACE. This is a strong quality of an an ALPHA. The new guy knows youve got some feelings towards him hence has resorted to using the NO CONTACT RULE on you to attract you further but might actually not care if eventually you loose interest in him. i bet you, you will get attracted to him more and be tempted to keep in touch with him. I have this advize for you, you cant eat your cake and have it. You must let go off one person; either your boyfriend or the new guy. Give your boyfriend some time to adjust back to his alpha qualities that was attracting you initially. If you dont see them anymore and keep loosing attarction for your boyfriend quit that relationship but dont just jump unto the new guy immediately. The new guy MIGHT just be playing mind games on you or he is actually a genuine alpha. Becareful as he MIGHT just be a player.
In summary, there is no problem picking an Alpha over a nice guy. Being too nice is a fake life to get validation from people to praise you. If your comfortable with a nice guy then stick with your boyfriend, you could develop him o be like the new guy over time. stop contacting the new guy for the next 30 days and see if you still develop attarction towards him or not. Sit your boyfriend down and tell him he is no longer the same person you knew from the onset. If he ask to know why. Tell him to be a MAN. Dont go into extra details. he will get the message and appreciate you.

Favour2323:
Nairalanders, I'm about to do something my conscience doesn't agree with but it feels like the right decision to make. I have a boyfriend. We've been dating for the past 6 months. I love him. We were good friends before we started dating. I'm someone who doesn't trust easily and I like to assess a guy for a while before dating him. I assessed his intentions and I realised he didn't just want to have sex with me and leave. He loved me just as I loved him.

Three months ago I met this guy. At first I just saw him as a friend, but as I got to know him I started noticing the good qualities he possessed. He's very attractive, very intelligent and wellspoken. My conversations with him were so immersive. The little time I spent with him always left a profound impression on me. Soon I noticed I had started developing feelings for him. I was still in love with my boyfriend nevertheless.

One day the new guy asked me if I had a boyfriend. I told him I did. The next day he called me and said that he didn't want to interfere with my relationship. He said he had feelings for me and he couldn't remain friends with me when he knows I have a boyfriend. I told him that I had feelings for him as well and that we could still remain friends but he refused and suggested that we stopped talking. He hasn't called or texted me since that day.

This situation has left me in an emotional turmoil. This new guy represents everything I want in a guy and as much as I don't want to admit it, he possesses better qualities than my boyfriend. I can't imagine a life where I can't talk to him anymore. I really like him. His decision has left me in a dicey position. It's unfair to leave my boyfriend who has always been nice to me for someone else, but the new guy doesn't want to have anything to do with me again as long as I'm in a relationship.

Please I need advice. I don't want to make the wrong decision.