₦airaland Forum

spiralwedge:
Mizflo,
Give her up for adoption. That's the right thing now.

It will be tough at first, but best you adjust and face your life squarely while she's in safe hands.

If you don't, you will suffer her for nothing and it will affect you getting the best out of the remaining years in your life.

Never be tired of this life, always make use of new opportunities even if it is not conventional or popular. In this case, your opportunity is to be able to make something out of your life while your daughter grows elsewhere to be an adult.

You will be fine, she will be fine too. Which state are you?
I don’t know people this much intelligent are on nairaland , God bless you sir .


Modified:
I just read other people's comments above mine. Please ignore them. They sit comfortably typing without empathy and with the typical Nigerian mindset.

Adoption is very good, your daughter will have people she can look up to as parents/guardians. She needs that foundation at least till when she is 18. You are merely 21 and this is your chance to restart your life. If you don't take this chance, you will suddenly reach 40, depressed, broke, miserable and suicidal. Please take this chance, especially for your daughter to have a home.

unclemaths:
You are an embittered soul in serious need of help.

Whao, you needed help and you actually said the quoted?!

Maybe all those talks about you were true by the way.

Haven't you read about Biblical Job? Joseph? Hanna? Sarah?

Please, don't add blasphemy to your issues.

Nothing do your daughter..
You are the one in serious need of help.

Saao:
bro your solution wasnt complete. Before you led one to Christ if you see her naked, cloth her first so that u can preach to her. I read it with tears in my eyes. I saw a girl that has suffered and still suffering. So u don't just bring Jesus to her, first find her a shelter, what to do, then preaching follow.

Mizflo:
Please I need your advice. I had created this account because I am well known here with my main account because I am always active and I want to remain anonymously.

Am 21 a single mum with 1 girl age 5 , her dad rejected me when I was pregnant he left when I was 4 months pregnant with her .

I had a difficult time growing up , my mum died when I was 8 years and my dad denied me claiming my mum had cheated on him and there’s no way I could be his daughter.

My aunty who was supposed to care for me had never bothered about me , she was always out leaving me in the house all alone without food , whenever I complains she will beat me telling me to go to my mum graveyard to ask her for assistance.

I have suffered in the hand of my aunty she didn’t care about my education if I have managed to complete my primary school till jss2 was thanks to this aunty who was a teacher at my school and a good friend of my mum , she sponsored me , And when I was 14 my aunty landlord kicked her out of the house because of rent arrears she said I am the enemy of progress she cant take me to her boyfriend house because he won’t accept me to stay there that I should go and look for a place , I cried and pleaded with her to take me along with her but she refuse I beg her to show me where my dad is she said he will not accept me because he hated my mum but I beg her to take me to him .

She took me to him it was my first time seeing him I looked just like him with one eye big one small but he insulted the hell out of us saying he will never accept me because my mum was a cheater she had so many boyfriends that I should ask her who my real father is but my aunty insisted that my mum had told her before she passed on that he was my dad even taught I resembled him still he denied and kicked us out like we were dogs I cried and my aunty was angry because of the insult so she left me all alone in the street but later came to me .
Since that day my life situation has worsened because I was forced to stay with different people where I was being abused , my baby dad came as a guardian angel to my life he took care of everything i needed by promising me heaven on Earth I taught he will get me out of my hard situations but I was wrong i find out he was married with kids I was heartbroken because I didn’t want to live the same lifestyle as my mum had lived but history has repeated itself just like my mother had me with a married man but she knew he was married but me I didn’t know , but it was too late for me to moved on because I was already pregnant for him and I didn’t want to abort my baby I have decide to continue the relationship but when I was 4 months pregnant he left me and blocked me from all his contacts , this is the man that has never bothered to asked about his child for 5 years now..

My little girl dont even know her dad the same way I did not know mine until
I was 14 which break my heart anytime I think about it.

My daughter and I are staying with my madam the lady tat I serve her for now 3 years but things here hasn’t been easy for us because my madam children don’t like me they keep accusing of things I don’t do like I stole their money , clothes and many more before my madam was telling them to stop with their bad attitudes towards me but I have noticed that whenever they had accused me she start getting angry with me sometimes we can go days without her not talking to me which I think I have overstayed and I am not longer wanted here I want to leave this house and to go and hustle but I feared for my daughter because I don’t want her to end up like me.

If I leave this house we will be on the street for a long time till I will be able to get somewhere else to stay with her also I don’t think I can give her the best education because if she stay with me she will end up being a teen mother just like I did something I don’t want to happen to her and I came across someone who’s willing to help me by taking care of my daughter to give her the best life something that I have always wanted for her , she promised to take care of her till university and she will give me the money to rent a room and start up business she said she will take things to the right direction like adoption but I don’t know how she will do it because I have no idea that I will have to sign up papers for agreement i have agreed because I think is really a good opportunity for me even taught I have accepted but sometimes I am getting worried about giving her my daughter I am having sleepless nights and thinking all nights.

I am just tired of living this life I didn’t ask to be born my parents created me and now I am suffering from their mistakes something I didn’t consented and I don’t want my daughter to suffer because of my mistake I think giving her up for adoption is a good thing , but I don’t know if I am doing the right things.

please no insult what is your advice for me.

Thanks

Mizflo:
Thanks for the advice. I have lost faith in Jesus because if he was there I wouldn’t have been suffering like this . I don’t want to look for him because he has never care about me and I don’t want to know him

Mizflo:
Thanks for the advice. I have lost faith in Jesus because if he was there I wouldn’t have been suffering like this . I don’t want to look for him because he has never care about me and I don’t want to know him

Righteousness89:


Thus Says the Lord,

You will Seek me and Find me when you Search for me with all your Heart..

JESUS is Waiting for you with open Arms..

When you are Ready to Meet Him, you will get Solution

steve11215:
[Tquote author=Mizflo post=92867426]
Thanks for the advice. I have lost faith in Jesus because if he was there I wouldn’t have been suffering like this . I don’t want to look for him because he has never care about me and I don’t want to know him

And this is the reason he has not come ..... You really have not welcomed him

Babe nobody can help you here "only Jesus" forget the delay and look up to him

Heartheart:
what's the guarantee that the child won't go through series of abuse even worse than the mother. This is not USA that there are laws binding adoption. This is Nigeria .the child will most likely be used as a maid. She was even promised money for rent. It's more like they're trading the daughter. If she signs those papers, she won't have any rights whatsoever over the child. She can even be denied contact with her. U see what happened to u OP when someone else raised u. U see what happened. And she was
your aunt o. Life is gonna be hard but u have to pick yourself up and struggle. If it's to hawk, my dear hawk. I've met ppl that we're raised by single mothers and they told their stories of their struggles. But today, things are getting better.
OP if you want to break that chain, raise your child the right way, put her in school. Public school is there. When she comes back, let her assists u. Ask about her studies, tell her to read and encourage her. Because if that girl becomes successful, you'll be the first to reap from it. There are several menial jobs u can do. Struggle, it will be worth it in the end I promise u. Give that child the love and care u never had, train her well. You will surely reap the fruit of your labor.

Righteousness89:
I will be Very Frank with you!

Until the Root Cause of a Problem is Tackled, one might keep Going in Circles. And also using Basket to Fetch Water..

The Same Pattern of your Mum is Exactly what Happened to you.

Its time for you to treat that issue..

It does not look like what can be done by Power.

My Advice to you is to Seek For GENUIE Bible Believing Church. Go there, Surrender to JESUS Completely and Let HIM Work on you..

You need to be Soaked in God to Break Certain yokes and Patterns..

Once the Root Cause is Sorted, other things will Fall in Place..

Mizflo:
Please I need your advice. I had created this account because I am well known here with my main account because I am always active and I want to remain anonymously.

Am 21 a single mum with 1 girl age 5 , her dad rejected me when I was pregnant he left when I was 4 months pregnant with her .

I had a difficult time growing up , my mum died when I was 8 years and my dad denied me claiming my mum had cheated on him and there’s no way I could be his daughter.

My aunty who was supposed to care for me had never bothered about me , she was always out leaving me in the house all alone without food , whenever I complains she will beat me telling me to go to my mum graveyard to ask her for assistance.

I have suffered in the hand of my aunty she didn’t care about my education if I have managed to complete my primary school till jss2 was thanks to this aunty who was a teacher at my school and a good friend of my mum , she sponsored me , And when I was 14 my aunty landlord kicked her out of the house because of rent arrears she said I am the enemy of progress she cant take me to her boyfriend house because he won’t accept me to stay there that I should go and look for a place , I cried and pleaded with her to take me along with her but she refuse I beg her to show me where my dad is she said he will not accept me because he hated my mum but I beg her to take me to him .

She took me to him it was my first time seeing him I looked just like him with one eye big one small but he insulted the hell out of us saying he will never accept me because my mum was a cheater she had so many boyfriends that I should ask her who my real father is but my aunty insisted that my mum had told her before she passed on that he was my dad even taught I resembled him still he denied and kicked us out like we were dogs I cried and my aunty was angry because of the insult so she left me all alone in the street but later came to me .
Since that day my life situation has worsened because I was forced to stay with different people where I was being abused , my baby dad came as a guardian angel to my life he took care of everything i needed by promising me heaven on Earth I taught he will get me out of my hard situations but I was wrong i find out he was married with kids I was heartbroken because I didn’t want to live the same lifestyle as my mum had lived but history has repeated itself just like my mother had me with a married man but she knew he was married but me I didn’t know , but it was too late for me to moved on because I was already pregnant for him and I didn’t want to abort my baby I have decide to continue the relationship but when I was 4 months pregnant he left me and blocked me from all his contacts , this is the man that has never bothered to asked about his child for 5 years now..

My little girl dont even know her dad the same way I did not know mine until
I was 14 which break my heart anytime I think about it.

My daughter and I are staying with my madam the lady tat I serve her for now 3 years but things here hasn’t been easy for us because my madam children don’t like me they keep accusing of things I don’t do like I stole their money , clothes and many more before my madam was telling them to stop with their bad attitudes towards me but I have noticed that whenever they had accused me she start getting angry with me sometimes we can go days without her not talking to me which I think I have overstayed and I am not longer wanted here I want to leave this house and to go and hustle but I feared for my daughter because I don’t want her to end up like me.

If I leave this house we will be on the street for a long time till I will be able to get somewhere else to stay with her also I don’t think I can give her the best education because if she stay with me she will end up being a teen mother just like I did something I don’t want to happen to her and I came across someone who’s willing to help me by taking care of my daughter to give her the best life something that I have always wanted for her , she promised to take care of her till university and she will give me the money to rent a room and start up business she said she will take things to the right direction like adoption but I don’t know how she will do it because I have no idea that I will have to sign up papers for agreement i have agreed because I think is really a good opportunity for me even taught I have accepted but sometimes I am getting worried about giving her my daughter I am having sleepless nights and thinking all nights.

I am just tired of living this life I didn’t ask to be born my parents created me and now I am suffering from their mistakes something I didn’t consented and I don’t want my daughter to suffer because of my mistake I think giving her up for adoption is a good thing , but I don’t know if I am doing the right things.

please no insult what is your advice for me.

Thanks

loneprof:
My dear, I hope all you wrote is true and I genuinely feel bad for you. What the guy wrote about seeking God is true and I also understand that due to your situation, you feel abandoned and alone, but it doesn't negate the fact that what he said is true.

Since this your baby daddy denied the child, have you reported to the police? You can also contact human rights/welfare agency to take up the case with him cos he doesn't have a right to deny his child's paternity. Don't sit down and be looking, contact the nearest police station and explain your situation, they will drag the guy to welfare and force him to pay for the child's upkeep, after all, you didn't impregnate yourself.

spiralwedge:
Mizflo,
Give her up for adoption. That's the right thing now.

It will be tough at first, but best you adjust and face your life squarely while she's in safe hands.

If you don't, you will suffer her for nothing and it will affect you getting the best out of the remaining years in your life.

Never be tired of this life, always make use of new opportunities even if it is not conventional or popular. In this case, your opportunity is to be able to make something out of your life while your daughter grows elsewhere to be an adult.

You will be fine, she will be fine too. Which state are you?


Modified:
I just read other people's comments above mine. Please ignore them. They sit comfortably typing without empathy and with the typical Nigerian mindset.

Adoption is very good, your daughter will have people she can look up to as parents/guardians. She needs that foundation at least till when she is 18. You are merely 21 and this is your chance to restart your life. If you don't take this chance, you will suddenly reach 40, depressed, broke, miserable and suicidal. Please take this chance, especially for your daughter to have a home.

Righteousness89:
I will be Very Frank with you!

Until the Root Cause of a Problem is Tackled, one might keep Going in Circles. And also using Basket to Fetch Water..

The Same Pattern of your Mum is Exactly what Happened to you.

Its time for you to treat that issue..

It does not look like what can be done by Power.

My Advice to you is to Seek For GENUIE Bible Believing Church. Go there, Surrender to JESUS Completely and Let HIM Work on you..

You need to be Soaked in God to Break Certain yokes and Patterns..

Once the Root Cause is Sorted, other things will Fall in Place..

Righteousness89:


Thus Says the Lord,

You will Seek me and Find me when you Search for me with all your Heart..

JESUS is Waiting for you with open Arms..

When you are Ready to Meet Him, you will get Solution

Mizflo:
Please I need your advice. I had created this account because I am well known here with my main account because I am always active and I want to remain anonymously.

Am 21 a single mum with 1 girl age 5 , her dad rejected me when I was pregnant he left when I was 4 months pregnant with her .

I had a difficult time growing up , my mum died when I was 8 years and my dad denied me claiming my mum had cheated on him and there’s no way I could be his daughter.

My aunty who was supposed to care for me had never bothered about me , she was always out leaving me in the house all alone without food , whenever I complains she will beat me telling me to go to my mum graveyard to ask her for assistance.

I have suffered in the hand of my aunty she didn’t care about my education if I have managed to complete my primary school till jss2 was thanks to this aunty who was a teacher at my school and a good friend of my mum , she sponsored me , And when I was 14 my aunty landlord kicked her out of the house because of rent arrears she said I am the enemy of progress she cant take me to her boyfriend house because he won’t accept me to stay there that I should go and look for a place , I cried and pleaded with her to take me along with her but she refuse I beg her to show me where my dad is she said he will not accept me because he hated my mum but I beg her to take me to him .

She took me to him it was my first time seeing him I looked just like him with one eye big one small but he insulted the hell out of us saying he will never accept me because my mum was a cheater she had so many boyfriends that I should ask her who my real father is but my aunty insisted that my mum had told her before she passed on that he was my dad even taught I resembled him still he denied and kicked us out like we were dogs I cried and my aunty was angry because of the insult so she left me all alone in the street but later came to me .
Since that day my life situation has worsened because I was forced to stay with different people where I was being abused , my baby dad came as a guardian angel to my life he took care of everything i needed by promising me heaven on Earth I taught he will get me out of my hard situations but I was wrong i find out he was married with kids I was heartbroken because I didn’t want to live the same lifestyle as my mum had lived but history has repeated itself just like my mother had me with a married man but she knew he was married but me I didn’t know , but it was too late for me to moved on because I was already pregnant for him and I didn’t want to abort my baby I have decide to continue the relationship but when I was 4 months pregnant he left me and blocked me from all his contacts , this is the man that has never bothered to asked about his child for 5 years now..

My little girl dont even know her dad the same way I did not know mine until
I was 14 which break my heart anytime I think about it.

My daughter and I are staying with my madam the lady tat I serve her for now 3 years but things here hasn’t been easy for us because my madam children don’t like me they keep accusing of things I don’t do like I stole their money , clothes and many more before my madam was telling them to stop with their bad attitudes towards me but I have noticed that whenever they had accused me she start getting angry with me sometimes we can go days without her not talking to me which I think I have overstayed and I am not longer wanted here I want to leave this house and to go and hustle but I feared for my daughter because I don’t want her to end up like me.

If I leave this house we will be on the street for a long time till I will be able to get somewhere else to stay with her also I don’t think I can give her the best education because if she stay with me she will end up being a teen mother just like I did something I don’t want to happen to her and I came across someone who’s willing to help me by taking care of my daughter to give her the best life something that I have always wanted for her , she promised to take care of her till university and she will give me the money to rent a room and start up business she said she will take things to the right direction like adoption but I don’t know how she will do it because I have no idea that I will have to sign up papers for agreement i have agreed because I think is really a good opportunity for me even taught I have accepted but sometimes I am getting worried about giving her my daughter I am having sleepless nights and thinking all nights.

I am just tired of living this life I didn’t ask to be born my parents created me and now I am suffering from their mistakes something I didn’t consented and I don’t want my daughter to suffer because of my mistake I think giving her up for adoption is a good thing , but I don’t know if I am doing the right things.

please no insult what is your advice for me.

Thanks

Righteousness89:


I Have Given the Solution..

You can Keep touring up and down .. That's Human Nature! We are Naturally Stubborn.

When u are Through with touring the ends of the Earth, u will come back to JESUS . That is where your Solution lies....

Righteousness89:
I will be Very Frank with you!

Until the Root Cause of a Problem is Tackled, one might keep Going in Circles. And also using Basket to Fetch Water..

The Same Pattern of your Mum is Exactly what Happened to you.

Its time for you to treat that issue..

It does not look like what can be done by Power.

My Advice to you is to Seek For GENUIE Bible Believing Church. Go there, Surrender to JESUS Completely and Let HIM Work on you..

You need to be Soaked in God to Break Certain yokes and Patterns..

Once the Root Cause is Sorted, other things will Fall in Place..

Mizflo:
Thanks for the advice. I have lost faith in Jesus because if he was there I wouldn’t have been suffering like this . I don’t want to look for him because he has never care about me and I don’t want to know him

Mizflo:
Thanks for the advice. I have lost faith in Jesus because if he was there I wouldn’t have been suffering like this . I don’t want to look for him because he has never care about me and I don’t want to know him