₦airaland Forum

Heartbrokengirl:
I am not buying anything, the chat is from months back.
Some of us are quite introverted, we don’t know these things and people capitalize on it to play us. Two of my friends told me he would hurt me. I kept asking him questions and he kept twisting details. I met 3 of his family members and they didn’t say anything, they were welcoming. I guess they all want him to remarry and felt he has told me he is married.

shortgun:
I understand you, u should know that at the end he finally did the right thing by telling you b4 sleeping with you.
Many men who are after ur body or wants to continue to decieve u wont do this.
He may also be in a state of confusion the time you guys started, he was also afraid of losing you...these are all normal human behaviours.

At this stage it all depends on what you want.

shortgun:
Will you stop this Nonsense!
Do you know her? Have u been to her closet ?
Stop typing like a frustrated person.

CsRockefeller:
You sound like a good girl. That leads me to the next question, why do good girls fall for bad Boyz?

Heartbrokengirl:
I didn’t fall for a bad boy, I fell for a man who deceived me into thinking he is good.

Heartbrokengirl:
Would have been better if I did this...unfortunately, he was the one that deceived me.

CsRockefeller:
My dear that's the issue, you must see behind the mask. Everyone wears one, everyone including you and I.

You probably saw behind it but you were scared to do the next step, which is to ask questions and get satisfactory answer.

Always learn to look behind the mask in dealing with people.

CsRockefeller:
Your friend who is obviously more experience in dating saw this and gave you the red flag, but you were too clouded by his theatrics.

Heartbrokengirl:
I asked questions. I can’t say all he said because the world is a small place and someone close might be reading, but he had answers and alibis. His family is not in Nigeria, so it all aligned for him. Believe me, I asked and he answered. Due to the nature of our jobs, I couldn’t be policing him, not like I would have if I had all the time.

You are right at looking behind the mask. I am a very trusting person, everyone kept telling me I will learn the hard way soon.

Heartbrokengirl:
I have always hated the idea of dating married people, but here I am...the ex-girlfriend of a married man.

It started sometime during the lockdown, I went somewhere to get groceries and ran into this man. Let’s call him Mr X. His smile and sense of humour was the attraction. He was putting on a nice senator material and when I stood for us to leave, he towered above me. I am a 6ft tall lady and ladies with my height can tell the happiness when you meet a taller man.

We started chatting regularly and we were in a competition to give ourselves treats. On our second date which I initiated, I asked his age and he replied 36, he asked mine and I told him. He expressed his doubts and I showed him my drivers license. Started asking many questions about my background and I answered all of them. I asked about him too, including his marital status.

I had just gotten out of a relationship, his father said he wouldn’t marry outside the Catholic church and he started drifting, I had to let him go. It was tough for me, but after months of keeping to myself, my friend encouraged me to go on dates and give another man a chance. I decided to give Mr X a chance.

It was beautiful. We were in a competition to please ourselves, take ourselves out and we both had a healthy sense of humour...chatting was fun!!! Everywhere we went, people stared. We were all over ourselves even in public and till date I wonder how he pulled that off.

One day his office had a party and he asked if I could come, I said yes. Got there and the guys were looking at me with lust, the ladies were looking at me with pity. He said the ladies were jealous of my looks and some of them have been crushing on him. If you see him and see me, you’ll understand why this explanation made little sense.

After the party that day, it was late to go back to my house and his house was farther, so we decided to book a hotel around. That night was our most intimate night. We kissed, he gave me leg massages, a head and said he is ready when I am ready. I was blown away. Could this be real?

I always noticed he would be lost in thoughts whenever we are together and blame it on work. Other times he will start feeling sick and I would have to close earlier to go give him food and drugs. This became a regular occurence until one day…

He had fallen sick as usual. I made him promise to take pain relievers and we should consider going to the hospital. He didn’t do this and I had to make out time within the week to go check on him. He said it is because he was missing me, how sweet!

He didn’t get better, it was obvious something was bothering him. I decided I will take him for lunch so we can talk about it, but he couldn’t wait. That night he said he has something to tell me, he kept apologizing but still couldn’t say it. He asked if he could send a voice note and I told him to go ahead.

At about 3mins into the voice note, I felt my world crumbling. He told me he was married and has been married for almost 10years with kids. His family was not in the country, that is why I never saw traces of them. He said he had been battling with the guilt and was scared to tell me because some other girl left when she found out and the last was with him for money. He knew I would leave and was scared, his best friend told him to give it time, another told him to ghost me but I have been good to him and his conscience won’t let him. Other friends said he should never mention it to me.


When my friend saw him, she told me he was going to hurt me. I asked her how and she said I was too innocent for him. She didn’t say further not to be termed hater, but since he made me happy again...she wished me well.

I kept replaying the audio while he kept asking me to say something. I wondered if he treated his wife the way he treated me. He was such a gentleman. Held my hands when I had to walk in heels, opened the car door for me, checked on me at work, gave me handmade customized gifts...he made them himself. He said his wife is bad and he wants divorce her, lolz. I told him they all say that. I told him how much he has hurt me, but I forgive him and appreciate him telling me when he did.

It has been almost 3months but the pain lingers. I know I will be fine…

DukeJoe17:
There is nothing strange here, his handsomeness got your pussy dripping for him, this guy is a real niggar, he just hurt you with the truth so that you won't blame him of using and dumping you tomorrow rather he makes you dump yourself.
Believe me, if you have mistakenly continue dating him, he could have cemmented his dick in your pussy for ever.
There is more joy in bleeping a pussy without commitment hahaha.

Baddest niggar.

Heartbrokengirl:
It is okay... I am learning the ways of men.

Saccharine:
Sorry for your pain,you will heal with time.
Next time,do your due diligence, Facebook,LinkedIn, Instagram etc before throwing your heart into anyone.

Married people get bored and start seeking excitement, its unfortunate that you're a victim.
If he was honest in the first place,at least you would have had the option to go ahead or to reject him.

The whole 'my wife is evil' thing is probably a lie told to butter you up.Its the usual line.

I can assure you that you're not the only girl he's been seeing,the whole point of cheating is sex,he wasn't having sex with you so he must have been getting it from somewhere seeing as his so called ' evil 'wife is abroad.

Hope you get smarter and more level headed in any relationships going forward.

Pele

Heartbrokengirl:
We never had penetrative sex, I have never had penetrative sex. The messages are from our past chat, I only cleared the chat after creating this thread. I have not set my eyes on him since then. He has called with other numbers, but that has been it.

Plz, you can reserve the “hoe” tag for your loved ones if it is such a pleasant name. Using it randomly on people you do not know is a not a sign of good upbringing.




You guys here are all about the dick, dick is everywhere, but I have lived 25yrs of my life without it and I didn’t die. I was only hurt he lied to me and led me on. Some of us are trusting. I know people that would have ransacked his house and social media pages, but I didn’t do that. I am not even on Facebook and Instagram. He preyed on the fact that I am quite private and trusting, direct your misgivings to him!!

jimmychang:
Why do good people like you meet bad people is one of the things I don't understand....my only happiness is that he didn't mess you up .... ..Na another story e for be .


Friends like you I will go all the way to protect them ...I have friends like that ..Just too innocent for this bleeped up world..... You will be fine my dear.

jimmychang:
Why do good people like you meet bad people is one of the things I don't understand....my only happiness is that he didn't mess you up .... ..Na another story e for be .


Friends like you I will go all the way to protect them ...I have friends like that ..Just too innocent for this bleeped up world..... You will be fine my dear.


Please try to be a little snoopy ..infact turn snoop Dog ...Protect yourself please because the fact that you are good doesn't make other humans good....

Heartbrokengirl:
He said the girl before me was aware, but was with him for money.

My friend checked LinkedIn when she wouldn’t stop suspecting him and saw nothing incriminating. Nothing on FB, she didn’t find him. She told me to get more information for her, kept telling me to search his house. Lolzz, smarter and less trusting. Thank you

Heartbrokengirl:
The post clearly says that I have let him go. He knew I would block him, that should tell you something...he knows what I stand for. He knows I wouldn’t be his accomplice

uncleck:
You see, why I said he's a good man is because men have superior thought process. He could have led you on if he had wanted. He could have made you change to a stupid being if he had wanted. Even if you suspected him, he could still have had his way. But he chosed not to rush you in sex even when it was obvious he could have his way as much as he wanted. He choosed to not hurt you more and ended it.

He is ignorant because he doesn't know that if he had opened up to you during one of your initial dates, you could still have liked him. Women are simply emotional and devoid of logic.

Heartbrokengirl:
Would have been better if I did this...unfortunately, he was the one that deceived me.

STOP DIS LAMENTATION!!!!!?
Something keep whispering to me u ain't this innocent......or he wasn't dat perfect in deceiving you...........U SAW THE SIGNS BUT THEN U IGNORED IT,RIGHT

daewoorazer:
You’re still a hoe with a hole.. who cares if you’ve had penetrative sex or not...if I realize u keep a battalion of Dildos in your closet, na to flog ur bumbum

Heartbrokengirl:
I have always hated the idea of dating married people, but here I am...the ex-girlfriend of a married man.

It started sometime during the lockdown, I went somewhere to get groceries and ran into this man. Let’s call him Mr X. His smile and sense of humour was the attraction. He was putting on a nice senator material and when I stood for us to leave, he towered above me. I am a 6ft tall lady and ladies with my height can tell the happiness when you meet a taller man.

We started chatting regularly and we were in a competition to give ourselves treats. On our second date which I initiated, I asked his age and he replied 36, he asked mine and I told him. He expressed his doubts and I showed him my drivers license. Started asking many questions about my background and I answered all of them. I asked about him too, including his marital status.

I had just gotten out of a relationship, his father said he wouldn’t marry outside the Catholic church and he started drifting, I had to let him go. It was tough for me, but after months of keeping to myself, my friend encouraged me to go on dates and give another man a chance. I decided to give Mr X a chance.

It was beautiful. We were in a competition to please ourselves, take ourselves out and we both had a healthy sense of humour...chatting was fun!!! Everywhere we went, people stared. We were all over ourselves even in public and till date I wonder how he pulled that off.

One day his office had a party and he asked if I could come, I said yes. Got there and the guys were looking at me with lust, the ladies were looking at me with pity. He said the ladies were jealous of my looks and some of them have been crushing on him. If you see him and see me, you’ll understand why this explanation made little sense.

After the party that day, it was late to go back to my house and his house was farther, so we decided to book a hotel around. That night was our most intimate night. We kissed, he gave me leg massages, a head and said he is ready when I am ready. I was blown away. Could this be real?

I always noticed he would be lost in thoughts whenever we are together and blame it on work. Other times he will start feeling sick and I would have to close earlier to go give him food and drugs. This became a regular occurence until one day…

He had fallen sick as usual. I made him promise to take pain relievers and we should consider going to the hospital. He didn’t do this and I had to make out time within the week to go check on him. He said it is because he was missing me, how sweet!

He didn’t get better, it was obvious something was bothering him. I decided I will take him for lunch so we can talk about it, but he couldn’t wait. That night he said he has something to tell me, he kept apologizing but still couldn’t say it. He asked if he could send a voice note and I told him to go ahead.

At about 3mins into the voice note, I felt my world crumbling. He told me he was married and has been married for almost 10years with kids. His family was not in the country, that is why I never saw traces of them. He said he had been battling with the guilt and was scared to tell me because some other girl left when she found out and the last was with him for money. He knew I would leave and was scared, his best friend told him to give it time, another told him to ghost me but I have been good to him and his conscience won’t let him. Other friends said he should never mention it to me.


When my friend saw him, she told me he was going to hurt me. I asked her how and she said I was too innocent for him. She didn’t say further not to be termed hater, but since he made me happy again...she wished me well.

I kept replaying the audio while he kept asking me to say something. I wondered if he treated his wife the way he treated me. He was such a gentleman. Held my hands when I had to walk in heels, opened the car door for me, checked on me at work, gave me handmade customized gifts...he made them himself. He said his wife is bad and he wants divorce her, lolz. I told him they all say that. I told him how much he has hurt me, but I forgive him and appreciate him telling me when he did.

It has been almost 3months but the pain lingers. I know I will be fine…

Heartbrokengirl:
Lolzzzz!! I have learnt nah. Snoop doggy dog henceforth. I hate to live that life of suspecting a partner, but like you said, not everyone is good.

Sanchez01:
Sorry about your plight though. I wouldn't advise you you snoop in subsequent relationships. I believe why you got played was because you failed to do due diligence on him. Often times, the blameless, perfect man is one with a woman at home OR one who is single but has grown over time. Sadly, they fall into the former category, for the most part.

There will always be indicators that something isn't right but the voice of love and emotion often overshadows all others. Snooping isn't the way to good. If you ask the right questions, you will always find a questionable response that could give clues on what the other person is lying about or not willing to share. But does it mean you can rely on their words alone? Well, that is subjective.

Heartbrokengirl:
Nairalanders and insults. How exactly am I the side hoe here? Someone clearly looked me in the face and lied to me many times and I am the hoe?

Are you always like this or you are faking it?

I don’t need your advice, I advised myself and left him for his wife and family.

bukatyne:
25yrs to 36yrs?

Babes why?

A 36yr old guy (almost 40?) to your young self?

Maybe my bias speaking here.

Anyways, good you came out of it and Bobo is a gamer, forget all the years and apology.

He probably realized you would not give up sex soon that's why he jumped to the next person.

@family welcoming you: some families are legit useless and immoral. Or since they are Muslims, he told them he wants to marry you.

Ask your friends what they saw in him then you can pick the logical stuffs for further learning.

Good luck.

daewoorazer:
for the questions above and more, visit www.google.com

And let me know once you dm her...simp