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In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart - Romance (17) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralRomanceIn Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart (62624 Views)

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Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 7:37pm On Dec 13, 2020
Beverlyjean:
Good day nairalanders , am new on this forum and I actually registered here so that I can get a credible and mature solution to my lingering emotional and relationship problem.

It goes like this; I have a bf that I have been dating for a year now and he is a very wonderful Person, he is my first love and I really love him so much because he gives me a different kind of feeling that I have never felt before , but my dilemma is that I met another guy a month after I accepted to date my bf , we were normal friends for the first one month though I never told him I had a bf until he surprisingly made his intentions known to me . This other guy has been an angel in my life and we started hanging out frequently due to my bf not being around because he traveled out of the country , this other guy has been the most loving and caring guy that I have ever met, he is always there for me and showers me with so much care love and time . He then introduced me to my introduced me to his family ( his mum and dad inclusive) and they loved me at an instant and started welcoming me and calling me their daughter . Now this other guy is 30 while I turned 21 in December and my guy is 23 . This other guy has a great job and ready to settle but his not rushing me saying that he will wait till I am ready . The problem is that I don't have the type of love he wants me to have for him , the thing is that I love my bf so much and I am not ready to let him go . My bf missed my graduation , my birthday and Val's because he had some pressing issues though he sent me my gifts through mail but the other guy was there for me , came for my grad at gwagwalada, took me to a lovely restaurant on my bday and surprised me with a lovely gift and also spent time with me on Val's day and it was so lovely. My bf is around but I see him only 3 times a month and I don't complain but this other guy sees me like 4 times a week .

I have been in a romantic relationship with the new guy although we have done something's apart from direct sex because I am a virgin . This other guy has sacrificed a lot for me but I wanna let him go because he really want me to leave my bf and stay permanently with him , but I love my bf so much and my feeling for him is not strong . He said the reason why I don't love him is because my heart is somewhere else and the moment I leave my bf , I will start loving him as long as I concentrate solely with him.

He also said that even if I leave him and my bf should later find out what I did with him , that my bf will dump me , if not now but later and I will loose the opportunity of everlasting happiness with him ( the other guy)

I care a lot about the other guy and I have feelings for him but I love my bf a lot , even though he loves me more that my bf does.

The other guy also said my bf is still young and might disappoint me in the future . I believe my bf will not because I can guarantee that he is not cheating on me and will not .

The following are the questions that keep on giving me sleepless nights :

1. Will my bf dump me if he eventually finds out bout what I did with the other guy.
2 . Will my bf or me fall out of love as we grow due to the age
3. Am I sure that he is not cheating on me or later leave me for someone else
4. Should I loose my virginity to him to prove my love
5. Will I find another lovin guy like the other guy later in life if my guy leaves me
6 . Will I leave to regret leaving the other guy
7 . Should I follow my heart or head because my heart says my bf but my head says the other guy
8. Will I fall inlove with the other guy if I stop seeing my bf?

Please help me with very mature answers because this will play a vital role in my life in the future .

Ladies that have experienced this come forth and guys that understand the way guys reason should help out pleaseeeee , because am still a novice when it comes to relationship issues. Thank you
Who did you later choosed?
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Beverlyjean(op): 8:09pm On Dec 13, 2020
Europeanian:
Who did you later choosed?
None...married someone entirely different
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 8:47pm On Dec 13, 2020
Beverlyjean:
None...married someone entirely different
Wow..am so much interested in the gist..I should email you right?
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by SamgoldBaba: 12:39pm On Jan 08, 2021
Beverlyjean:
None...married someone entirely different
wow, question I was about to ask...would be glad to know the gist too
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Petyprince: 2:16am On Mar 02, 2021
So the older guy later used and dumped the OP!! I knew it that he was never interested in the OP just to chop and clean mouth. This should be a lesson to many girls.
Wow..am so much interested in the gist..I should email you right?
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 5:13am On Jan 31, 2022
Yes , OP is reluctant to give detailed update that is likely what happened.
Petyprince:
So the older guy later used and dumped the OP!! I knew it that he was never interested in the OP just to chop and clean mouth. This should be a lesson to many girls.
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by JoyousFurnitire(m): 11:01am On Jun 11, 2022
naijaboiy:
angryangry
if you think you Love two people at once,,choose the second. undecided

Because if you really loved the first you wouldn't have a second option
angry

Confused set of species undecided
This is 2022 and this reply is still goated!!!
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by TheSourcerer: 1:27pm On Jun 12, 2022
JoyousFurnitire:
This is 2022 and this reply is still goated!!!
hi , hope you have a wonderful day and remember to smile buddy it helps smiley
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by JoyousFurnitire(m): 7:10pm On Jun 12, 2022
TheSourcerer:
hi , hope you have a wonderful day and remember to smile buddy it helps smiley
Yea boss, wonderful day it is cheesy

Trust yours was great too?
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 3:53am On Jun 26, 2023
So what’s the outcome and update of this story. I’m curious
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by softy(m): 11:02am On Aug 23, 2023
Beverlyjean:
Good day nairalanders , am new on this forum and I actually registered here so that I can get a credible and mature solution to my lingering emotional and relationship problem.

It goes like this; I have a bf that I have been dating for a year now and he is a very wonderful Person, he is my first love and I really love him so much because he gives me a different kind of feeling that I have never felt before , but my dilemma is that I met another guy a month after I accepted to date my bf , we were normal friends for the first one month though I never told him I had a bf until he surprisingly made his intentions known to me . This other guy has been an angel in my life and we started hanging out frequently due to my bf not being around because he traveled out of the country , this other guy has been the most loving and caring guy that I have ever met, he is always there for me and showers me with so much care love and time . He then introduced me to my introduced me to his family ( his mum and dad inclusive) and they loved me at an instant and started welcoming me and calling me their daughter . Now this other guy is 30 while I turned 21 in December and my guy is 23 . This other guy has a great job and ready to settle but his not rushing me saying that he will wait till I am ready . The problem is that I don't have the type of love he wants me to have for him , the thing is that I love my bf so much and I am not ready to let him go . My bf missed my graduation , my birthday and Val's because he had some pressing issues though he sent me my gifts through mail but the other guy was there for me , came for my grad at gwagwalada, took me to a lovely restaurant on my bday and surprised me with a lovely gift and also spent time with me on Val's day and it was so lovely. My bf is around but I see him only 3 times a month and I don't complain but this other guy sees me like 4 times a week .

I have been in a romantic relationship with the new guy although we have done something's apart from direct sex because I am a virgin . This other guy has sacrificed a lot for me but I wanna let him go because he really want me to leave my bf and stay permanently with him , but I love my bf so much and my feeling for him is not strong . He said the reason why I don't love him is because my heart is somewhere else and the moment I leave my bf , I will start loving him as long as I concentrate solely with him.

He also said that even if I leave him and my bf should later find out what I did with him , that my bf will dump me , if not now but later and I will loose the opportunity of everlasting happiness with him ( the other guy)

I care a lot about the other guy and I have feelings for him but I love my bf a lot , even though he loves me more that my bf does.

The other guy also said my bf is still young and might disappoint me in the future . I believe my bf will not because I can guarantee that he is not cheating on me and will not .

The following are the questions that keep on giving me sleepless nights :

1. Will my bf dump me if he eventually finds out bout what I did with the other guy.
2 . Will my bf or me fall out of love as we grow due to the age
3. Am I sure that he is not cheating on me or later leave me for someone else
4. Should I loose my virginity to him to prove my love
5. Will I find another lovin guy like the other guy later in life if my guy leaves me
6 . Will I leave to regret leaving the other guy
7 . Should I follow my heart or head because my heart says my bf but my head says the other guy
8. Will I fall inlove with the other guy if I stop seeing my bf?

Please help me with very mature answers because this will play a vital role in my life in the future .

Ladies that have experienced this come forth and guys that understand the way guys reason should help out pleaseeeee , because am still a novice when it comes to relationship issues. Thank you
....but[b] you are seriously cheating on him first, to the highest degree of impunity! [/b]huh huh huh grin grin grin grin grin

just dey play grin
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Beverlyjean(op): 11:23am On Aug 23, 2023
softy:
....but[b] you are seriously cheating on him first, to the highest degree of impunity! [/b]huh huh huh grin grin grin grin grin

just dey play grin
Lol...when I was still learning about the ways of the world... when I was still single... was still 21 then...lol
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Maks27: 2:09pm On Feb 09, 2024
Beverlyjean:
Lol...when I was still learning about the ways of the world... when I was still single... was still 21 then...lol
Can I dm you

I need to hear from you
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by HONESTMD: 1:13pm On Jul 12, 2024
Maks27:
Can I dm you

I need to hear from you
My friend, leave a married woman alone.
She is married .period!
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by bigpicture001: 6:00pm On Jul 16, 2024
Beverlyjean:
Good day nairalanders , am new on this forum and I actually registered here so that I can get a credible and mature solution to my lingering emotional and relationship problem.

It goes like this; I have a bf that I have been dating for a year now and he is a very wonderful Person, he is my first love and I really love him so much because he gives me a different kind of feeling that I have never felt before , but my dilemma is that I met another guy a month after I accepted to date my bf , we were normal friends for the first one month though I never told him I had a bf until he surprisingly made his intentions known to me . This other guy has been an angel in my life and we started hanging out frequently due to my bf not being around because he traveled out of the country , this other guy has been the most loving and caring guy that I have ever met, he is always there for me and showers me with so much care love and time . He then introduced me to my introduced me to his family ( his mum and dad inclusive) and they loved me at an instant and started welcoming me and calling me their daughter . Now this other guy is 30 while I turned 21 in December and my guy is 23 . This other guy has a great job and ready to settle but his not rushing me saying that he will wait till I am ready . The problem is that I don't have the type of love he wants me to have for him , the thing is that I love my bf so much and I am not ready to let him go . My bf missed my graduation , my birthday and Val's because he had some pressing issues though he sent me my gifts through mail but the other guy was there for me , came for my grad at gwagwalada, took me to a lovely restaurant on my bday and surprised me with a lovely gift and also spent time with me on Val's day and it was so lovely. My bf is around but I see him only 3 times a month and I don't complain but this other guy sees me like 4 times a week .

I have been in a romantic relationship with the new guy although we have done something's apart from direct sex because I am a virgin . This other guy has sacrificed a lot for me but I wanna let him go because he really want me to leave my bf and stay permanently with him , but I love my bf so much and my feeling for him is not strong . He said the reason why I don't love him is because my heart is somewhere else and the moment I leave my bf , I will start loving him as long as I concentrate solely with him.

He also said that even if I leave him and my bf should later find out what I did with him , that my bf will dump me , if not now but later and I will loose the opportunity of everlasting happiness with him ( the other guy)

I care a lot about the other guy and I have feelings for him but I love my bf a lot , even though he loves me more that my bf does.

The other guy also said my bf is still young and might disappoint me in the future . I believe my bf will not because I can guarantee that he is not cheating on me and will not .

The following are the questions that keep on giving me sleepless nights :

1. Will my bf dump me if he eventually finds out bout what I did with the other guy.
2 . Will my bf or me fall out of love as we grow due to the age
3. Am I sure that he is not cheating on me or later leave me for someone else
4. Should I loose my virginity to him to prove my love
5. Will I find another lovin guy like the other guy later in life if my guy leaves me
6 . Will I leave to regret leaving the other guy
7 . Should I follow my heart or head because my heart says my bf but my head says the other guy
8. Will I fall inlove with the other guy if I stop seeing my bf?

Please help me with very mature answers because this will play a vital role in my life in the future .

Ladies that have experienced this come forth and guys that understand the way guys reason should help out pleaseeeee , because am still a novice when it comes to relationship issues. Thank you
Babe this post was 2015....just for curiosity sake...how did it finalky play out BTW the three if u...?
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Beverlyjean(op): 6:10pm On Jul 16, 2024
bigpicture001:
Babe this post was 2015....just for curiosity sake...how did it finalky play out BTW the three if u...?
Married someone else
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by bigpicture001: 6:12pm On Jul 16, 2024
Beverlyjean:
Married someone else
Jeez! Both lost out..?

How so unpredictable the world is....but which of the decisions den did u finally take..?
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Beverlyjean(op): 6:55pm On Jul 16, 2024
bigpicture001:
Jeez! Both lost out..?

How so unpredictable the world is....but which of the decisions den did u finally take..?
I dint take any in the end .... I left the country around that time ... so it fizzled away
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by IamSainted(m): 6:59pm On Jul 16, 2024
zaralady:
Hhhmmmmmm...dis one is strong!...my dear my good advice is to stick to ur bf, reason because a guy who is comfortable dating u while u re a relatnship ll someday cheat on u while u datin him,secondly, he is selfish, for him to ask u to dump ur bf for him...gal Dats not a good person to me...my dear u got urself into dis mess....wen I was datin my bf I got a crush on an extremely lovin guy who wouldn't mind datin me while am datin my bf, but I knew wat I wanted...am not a cheat and I cnt leave my bf for someone else...because u love ur bf doesn't mean u wnt love odas....u jst hav to control ur emotionals...don't cheat in a relatnship if u cnt stay, jst leave!...u had better dump d oda guy and stick to ur bf else u ll end up loosin both, I was in dis shoe before and wat I did was dump the distractin guy and focus on my bf tho we re no more but I didn't regret my actions...y not confess to ur bf abt wat has been going on and as him to forgive u, @least dat is a test of love....u don't need to follow ur head without ur heart or heart without ur head all u hav to do is do the right tin....do the right tin gal and it includes not cheatin on ur bf..i cn tell u since Ave been in relatnship I hav neva cheated on my bf before...not even once, be prouud to b among the decent gals
Just look at how you made emphasis on not cheating on your bf.
Paradventure your bf gets asked, it might be that you are a chronic cheat.
Just a paradventure though as a Nigerian girl.
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by bigpicture001: 10:45pm On Jul 16, 2024
Beverlyjean:
I dint take any in the end .... I left the country around that time ... so it fizzled away
Life shall! Well congrats to ur husband..he laffed last
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