RedPanthar:




How will a woman dictate whom a man gives money to?

just ask those based abroad. it do happen in some homes here in Nigeria but most Nigeria men use gra gra to send money come to think of abroad where they get law backing them

luminouz:
...

All these vitriol from a supposed Ziondaughter?.

Chai...hypocrisy is human sha

I thought I was the only one who noticed that.
ziondaughter247 indeed

Scout60:


just ask those based abroad. it do happen in some homes here in Nigeria but most Nigeria men use gra gra to send money come to think of abroad where they get law backing them

Please stop this joke boss


The woman that will question the use of my financial resources has not been created.


She wan short be that. Na which kind joke be this one

DamZik:
The problem is that many people are marrying for beauty, class or money. These are wrong foundations upon which building marriages cannot last. The factors you listed above are not in their dictionary. How I wish they could learn.

Exactly. After mundane things that will later turn to haunt them in the future.

Naikkie:
Why can’t the Nigerian men marry foreigners?
Problem solved: marry whom is domiciled where you are.

The messiah complex is the problem, you are looking for who to save and who will worship you.

Marry where you are, or the messiah complex is not endearing to women (all races) abroad?

The Nigerian woman who has nothing going for her becomes appealing. She becomes perceived as the most rewarding to ‘save’

some Nigerian men can't integrate a different system. Don't blame then, na local breed dem be, those ones that can easily be deported back to the village with Akpu and Egusi diabolicaly from the Abroad

DamZik:
Colossians 3:18 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Any woman that questions this divine principle can never have a happy home no matter what or else she marries a simp. But I know most ladies don't like a simp as husband. The secrets of happy, fulfilling home are submission and love. Then you will the practicality of Heaven on earth.

In layman language, what if he refuses?

Ardar:


You know, it's quite funny that you mails suddenly seem to remember our mail relatives when we call out how utterly useless you are but always forget to remember your female relatives when you show your uncivilized, cave man behavior all over this forum every single day.

for information cave woman. we males didnt start d abuse n name calling, u did. So we were only trying to remind u that calling a man an Ape also includes ur male relatives. we didnt call any female names so our female relative ve not bn called any names.

RedPanthar:




Please stop this joke boss


The woman that will question the use of my financial resources has not been created.


She wan short be that. Na which kind joke be this one

if she does, what will you do?

beat her or fight her.... for oyibo land na express u dey go

onyechez:

Who told you that. Hahaha, some people on NAIRALAND are funny. You're into relationships for various reasons don't be myopic, I have met many women who says they just want friendship nothing attached.

Friendship also requires transaction, u sell ur time between yourselves nah

SmartMen:
All these una rubbish Red Pill, Blue Pill is just nonsense... BE a man if you want to be a man not because of concocted ideology that you come across online.

Really u never jam!

Mikehot:
Bro tell us about redpill.
What is the best way to have a marriage that you can be safe incase the marriage crashes?

Follow dpsychologist on nairaland

DamZik:
What is transactional sex ?

Dick for pussy for time for money for attention for commitment for children for marriage

JovialJune:
In Nigeria, men are kings because the law favours you all, In the abroad, equality is king, and our women use it to their advantage.


The problem you guys have with wives from naija who went to the abroad is your failure to lord over her as it was in naija, y'all still want a lady of servitude who will abide by your rules and wishes cos of what you're used to forgetting obodo oyibo nor send you

It's simple, when you bring your wife over there, just know it is no longer a master slave norm but an equality, relinquish your right as being the head, you'll live your life peacefully,

I have peeps over there, and they're doing just fine.

Most of the men in this scenario are not necessarily domineering but there a number of reasons why these things happen.
1. Most of those marriages start on a wrong footing as the women usually don't love their men and only see them as a get out of jail card to be used for the betterment of her life and that of her siblings.

2. When the ladies get over their they take the advantage of family law but don't accept the financial behavior. By that I mean the 'my money is my money but your money is our money mentality'. Usually when she first arrives and barely earns the man carries the family and her education from his earning as family income but immediately she starts earning well she sees her income as hers alone and no longer make decisions as a family because she wants to use it to lift her family back home knowing fully well she has all the cards.
In those environments earnings from both spouse are treated as 'household income' even attracting some tax privileges but when these women with preconceived parental family betterment plan (that don't love but only tolerate their husband's from the beginning) get these cultural shock they revolt because they are not raised in that culture and now they have all the advantage.
So they begin to ask why should I not have 100% say over the money I bring? But they forget that they have had joint say over the money he was bringing in all along. They now see the man as a treat because he would ask questions about some of her expenses towards her parents family when they have immediate family plans.
Also he is no longer of use to her and she is not emotionally invested in him.

Don't forget they do this to their foreign husband's as well, if Nigerian husband's were domineering and bad as you paint them how come non Nigerian men also get this treatment?

Newman20:



I would like to focus on the bolded.


In our culture, even though it is hard to admit, the woman is generally seen as the person who is owned or dominated by the man. Even though you and other feminists view it as "misogyny" you have to admit it has kept the peace in our society.

Now, what the OP wants is for women abroad to submit to their husband's authority (most likely because her boyfriend abroad refused to take her with him or something ). But the truth is that it is simply not possible. The reason being that women abroad are generally supposed to be independent unlike our own system where women are supposed to submit and be taken care of by the man (even though this isn't needed cause they have their own talents to enable them succeed on their own) this creates a power tussle between the husband and wife abroad where the husband wants his wife to be submissive and the wife wants her husband to accept this lifestyle. This often results in unsavory situations such as the husband killing the wife wife taking the husband's properties etc.


Now, back to your bolded statement. It is utterly wrong because as long as Nigeria remains a nation with cultural history women and men will never be seen as equal thus killing the OP's hopes. In addition most (Nigerian) women who say women and men should be equal are hypocritical and still submit themselves to men knowingly or unknowingly due to our country's history.


Finally, I think that the easiest way to avoid situations like the husband killing the wife in abroad nations, is for the husband to marry in Nigeria and keep his wife there because as long as she goes with him because ( depending on whether or not they have a predetermined agreement with each other) there will most likely be either a conflict or a divorce.



Count yourself lucky to have received information from the one and only Newman20.

Lmao what da hell dude

This is a faceless forum, why feeling important, you sound ridiculous lol.

Zzor:
But you prefer transactional sex abi, what does that make you?

See why i still dey fear to propose to Zzor.

Harmlesspill:
To my fellow men,,it's not advisable in any manner to take your wife with you to a civilized world.
There's a way this vagina people's brain are wired,, they easily forgets your sacrifices to get them over there,, once you go with them and secondary their laws over there favours them(women)most.
Nothing like there are good ones,,they will definitely like to be in charge once they realize what law their new country has...
My own sister got married to a Nigerian guy staying abroad and the guy took her with him but what baffles me is the way my sister do things now, she's now claiming right over the guy.
I think that sent me to a school of making right decisions... nothing on earth will make me take my wife with me outside Nigeria

Wow...women ehn

rexington:


Most of the men in this scenario are not necessarily domineering but there a number of reasons why these things happen.
1. Most of those marriages start on a wrong footing as the women usually don't love their men and only see them as a get out of jail card to be used for the betterment of her life and that of her siblings.

2. When the ladies get over their they take the advantage of family law but don't accept the financial behavior. By that I mean the 'my money is my money but your money is our money mentality'. Usually when she first arrives and barely earns the man carries the family and her education from his earning as family income but immediately she starts earning well she sees her income as hers alone and no longer make decisions as a family because she wants to use it to lift her family back home knowing fully well she has all the cards.
In those environments earnings from both spouse are treated as 'household income' even attracting some tax privileges but when these women with preconceived parental family betterment plan (that don't love but only tolerate their husband's from the beginning) get these cultural shock they revolt because they are not raised in that culture and now they have all the advantage.
So they begin to ask why should I not have 100% say over the money I bring? But they forget that they have had joint say over the money he was bringing in all along. They now see the man as a treat because he would ask questions about some of her expenses towards her parents family when they have immediate family plans.
Also he is no longer of use to her and she is not emotionally invested in him.

Don't forget they do this to their foreign husband's as well, if Nigerian husband's were domineering and bad as you paint them how come non Nigerian men also get this treatment?

You aptly captured the situation 100%.
9ja girls offering fake ass love to 9ja abroad based guys then dealing with them..as soon as they escape Nigeria..

Also, that financial behaviour is one of the critical part of this unfortunate trend that has come to be associated with 9ja girls.

nitrogen:


Shut up abeg, yen yen yen yen.......

Loyalty is needed when you depend on a man to leave a gutter and impoverished lifestyle. You need to not worship but be loyal, make it work, stop growing wings overnight and doing the wrong thing.

Id1ot!

You must be living a miserable life to conclude that all Nigerian women depend on men... You need to change the class of women you mingle with, and also the enclave you live in. You also sound frustrated and bitter towards women. It goes to show that the women that brought you up did a terrible job. Kudos to all hardworking Nigerian women who have sacrificed all towards their family and loved ones!
If Nigerian women were to be terrible, then I am yet to see a Nigerian man who speaks ill about his mother or sisters.

SamNaijaboy:
I always laugh when Nigerian women say is it a big deal bringing her over? If it is not, then she should do it herself now?

Don't mind their useless broke ass liability mouth..
If e easy to go abroad why not her spend the millions and go by herself nah..Nonsense! Ungrateful women!

ceeceeuwa:

You must be living a miserable life to conclude that all Nigerian women depend on men... You need to change the class of women you mingle with, and also the enclave you live in. You also sound frustrated and bitter towards women. It goes to show that the women that brought you up did a terrible job. Kudos to all hardworking Nigerian women who have sacrificed all towards their family and loved ones!
If Nigerian women were to be terrible, then I am yet to see a Nigerian man who speaks ill about his mother or sisters.

You are a tool! I dont know why you decided to bring your elders into this. I am so sure you are guilty, reason you came out blazing with an AK47, better go and change your ways. Eeeedioootttt!

I swear if you try that sh1t again with me, I will curse your generation! Fuvktard!

fati2001:

Ke

JOACHINpedro:
Congrats to anyone making marriage undesirable for this generation. They're sure doing a good Job

How is that a good job

nitrogen:


You are a tool! I dont know why you decided to bring your elders into this. I am so sure you are guilty, reason you came out blazing with an AK47, better go and change your ways. Eeeedioootttt!

I swear if you try that sh1t again with me, I will curse your generation! Fuvktard!

Channel your curses and frustrations to those who made your life so bitter!
If you have regards for elders you won't come on a faceless forum to generalize and abuse women, forgetting that a woman birth you.
I see the struggles of women towards their family everyday... from the petty traders to professional women. It will be a disservice to their struggles if someone sits idle behind a keyboard and downplay their efforts and call them names because of his personal experience.

Jessepaid:


Shit...well...

Let us be irresponsible...

When we were responsible una play us 419

Cheers to an irresponsible 2021..

Deep down we all want love.. but you know that ain't easy in this generation

Lol they hate good guys but they like Randy men, naso one useless girl I love for university dey do me yanga up and down, while she will be calling my roommate just to intimidate me, the idiot finished university up till now no husband she don old at home, continue misbehaving babies when good men approach naso menopause go teach you lesson.

.

Hassanmaye:

How is that a good job

You must be fun at parties.

Newman20:


Is you knew you had no reply for me then you should've just not quoted me. Instead of posting 2 sentences to feel like you made a reasonable reply.

Lol ask yourself if your last comment made sense to you.....

MrColdsweat:
The modern woman is emotionally chaotic, psychologically violent and destructive.


Boycott marriage.

Especially if you want to live long Abi.

Frustrated007:
I wonder who the unfortunate guy is ...the guy that married you.

ojuu4u:



In fact husband and wife are no longer one but "many fleshes" who only have same purpose of having kids, after kids if fleshes scatter, I don't care!


I think I will start pity the feeling of school of taught who believed in banging girl and leave immediately.

No sir marry by all means we go dash you our women free abeg we need to prison you with your money na.

Favourchris:


Teaching ur sons how to worship women doesn't make u a wise mother.

Teach your son how to treat people right. Humanity b4 gender.

You guys are trying to solve a problem and creating another.

See, the world will squeeze out life out those boys... make them soft and watch other men match life out of them.

Out here even men don't give a f*ck about men. Is survival of the fittest.

Teach them how to treat people right, teach them decency of life...

If teach them how to worship women..

I pitty those boys, because even women won't spare them ..

The world is never perfect and can't be..

Is eat or be eaten

Lol women hate good guys they will just use and dump them

Hathor5:


Many women are willing to treat their husbands like kings, abroad or not, the problem is that too many men are far from marriage material and far from understanding what it means to be a good husband.

They know but the problem is they are tired of been manipulated over and use because of their simplicity