Afromentalist:

You people only like culture when it favours your materialistic tendencies. Now you are so attached to the culture of bringing gifts to the in laws,

If we now talk about polygamy and patriarchy , you will now curse culture and call it backwardness and woman exploitation.

Let's leave culture out of this discussion. Did the guy do anything that would warrant such foolish reaction ?

In fact if I be the man, I will never be back in such a relationship.

ceeceeuwa:

Poverty shall finish off me and my offspring till our last generation and there shall be no remedy to it! Forever and ever Amen!!

Mariangeles:
How come nobody understands the principle of giving gifts and the honour that comes with it?
It is not about what you give, it is the thought that counts.
If the young man had brought something as simple as fruits and the woman complained, then she would've been wrong.

It has nothing to do with poverty. Only someone with poverty mentality would think expecting gift(s) from someone is out of place, and only someone with inferiority complex would think it is a thing of shame to except gift from a certain someone.

"A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men"

Giving gifts will make way for you in the presence of Kings and great men.

shantti:


Grammatically and logically your write up made no sense, your funny, ive not even seen my neco result till date, i entered the university with only WAEC. Empty vessels make the loudest noise, you expressing pity for Nigerian education is the joke of the century, at least you should be schooling abroad to pity our educational system, but i am very sure you never see money register for jamb lesson not to talk of going to the university, keypad warrior, claiming online but offline you're very pathetic

Bennysam:

Oga if you have not married, I’m married and also visit my in-law before we got married nothing like gift everyday what my in-laws is after is well being of their daughter that is what a reasonable mother will be after

Mariangeles:


I don't know about the others, but in my tribe (Igbo), that's how things are done.
You don't go to your in-laws bare handed.
It is not an act to be proud of.

AngryIgboDon:


Women and not having common sense. Tufia.

Gifts bring you before great men indeed. How about the value of the visit and acclimatisatiin with future inlaws?

I don't blame you all. You people have always prefered a rich baboon that will treat your family like gutter pigs than a comfortable man that will treat you like royalty.

God punish entitlement mentality.

UnBanEbenezer:
it is your generations that do beg for crumbs and expecting any visitors that pay you poverty stricken fellows a visit you should expect he should be coming and feed you before starvation finishes off your family.
You're cursed with poverty and so shall it be till you fools turn a new leaf.
Bastard fellow
You be idiot

Fiscus105:



Go back to my last comment, I see full correction.

Schooling abroad again! Thank God that I schooled in Nigeria, I am still be able to correct 'obodo oyibo guy grammatical blunders, abroad guy doing menial job for White people.


I guess you will move higher from abroad to heaven

Fiscus105:



Go back to my last comment, I see full correction.

Schooling abroad again! Thank God that I schooled in Nigeria, I am still be able to correct 'obodo oyibo guy grammatical blunders, abroad guy doing menial job for White people.


I guess you will move higher from abroad to heaven

SweetCunt97:
Live it then and don't drag a woman into it if not capable. Ordinary bread or fruits you talking about considerate.

46arcadez:

The visit was not the first time, the first time he visited he did not go empty handed.
He bought things for the mother the first time he visited

TransAtlanticEx:
Are you sure you really wanna do this?
Cos I'm ready when you are.
Feed me and my family( a whole my family ooo) for ages yet your mama dey want kill herself say your fiance no buy bread for am?.
Why not use that money weh you want use am feed me and my generation buy your mama provisions keep for house na
And somehow its from this miserly,miserable existence that you wanna feed my family(really rich ) from?
My eldest sister got married in 2004,in 2003 when the man came for introduction,he wore shorts and was empty handed.
You know why?There was nothing he could bring that we don't have and he knew it
What you could have done sef to even cover your bf is send some money to your thirsty mom and claim your bf sent it,but instead you fought with him over it,maybe because you and your mama don plan as una go share the stipends weh the guy suppose bring,
Yet a bottom feeder like you wants to feed my generation?

SweetCunt97:
Did I say gift everyday? Yes you right, a reasonable mother shouldn't bring up such. Personally I thought it was his first visit

Miarose:
you and your mother are too hungry. Respect and courtesy >> gift.

Minemrys:

the way you even call it ordinary is what i d0n't get. Did she labor in his hands to be expecting ordinary bread or whatever? If it's so ordinary, why the fuss? Here's the thing the mama no try, and the babe wey ma go c0nfr0nt the guy the way she do, no get wisd0m.
What the eff with the expectati0ns sef? A freaking gift? Haba, i d0n see gr0oms dy go visit in laws without gifts, and n0thing happened. No fuss. Married or n0t, no one owes the in laws [be the gr0om or bride] anything m0netary or whatever when c0ming for a social visit for it to be carried as a big deal. H0nestly, i d0n't like your reas0ning. Because he intends to marry doesn't make him a slave absent freewill till eternity. Gift maybe n0thing, but the fact there's a problem because of it, is what we are saying. Besides, the Lady use her m0uth talk say prior visits the guy bring s0mething for the mama.
Relati0nships fall apart because of t0o much expectati0ns over little things. It's n0t slavery n0r a job.

osazsky:
but from d op write up the guy has been visiting before and d mum expects gift everyday

Nellsworld:

Ok i get it, but still he should ve still gotten something, even if na bread, we are Africans, especially 9ja we do not go to an elderly house empty handed, or he should ve given an excuse, although the said lady shouldn't ve told him on the phone like that, she should ve codedly told him wen she visit him, like joking abt it and explaining y it is done cos not everyone was brought up like that, like me, i was trained in a way that even if am going to see any elderly person, i must go with something.

Nellsworld:

Ok i get it, but still he should ve still gotten something, even if na bread, we are Africans, especially 9ja we do not go to an elderly house empty handed, or he should ve given an excuse, although the said lady shouldn't ve told him on the phone like that, she should ve codedly told him wen she visit him, like joking abt it and explaining y it is done cos not everyone was brought up like that, like me, i was trained in a way that even if am going to see any elderly person, i must go with something.

TransAtlanticEx:
Are you sure you really wanna do this?
Cos I'm ready when you are.
Feed me and my family( a whole my family ooo) for ages yet your mama dey want kill herself say your fiance no buy bread for am?.
Why not use that money weh you want use am feed me and my generation buy your mama provisions keep for house na
And somehow its from this miserly,miserable existence that you wanna feed my family(really rich ) from?
My eldest sister got married in 2004,in 2003 when the man came for introduction,he wore shorts and was empty handed.
You know why?There was nothing he could bring that we don't have and he knew it
What you could have done sef to even cover your bf is send some money to your thirsty mom and claim your bf sent it,but instead you fought with him over it,maybe because you and your mama don plan as una go share the stipends weh the guy suppose bring,
Yet a bottom feeder like you wants to feed my generation?

emonis88:
it can still b corrected. he can still send her something but if u r still angry u can go n marry ur mother.

Trayceey:
I'm not defending my mum. You know these mothers always have a hold on us

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

GayPontiff:




This post and iberibe.

Now I see why Africans are tot to live on trees like monkeys.
The young man truly deserves better.
His good behavior and other characteristics a mother would want for her daughter should be overlooked and replaced with his inability to bring stuff she will shit out next morning abi?
They ain't married yet o?
I was even expecting to see her say she sided her bf on d matter but now it has turned to serious beef.
Aunty will loose a good man and you are blaming being Africa for this irrational behaviour?
She should go and apologize to him, the boy owes her mom nothing! Not at least till marriage is sure.
He is manly to have even visited the woman.
Wherever he is may good fortunes locate him.

Graxie:
Please don't marry him, he will always hate your mom. You did wrong by telling him what your mom said. It wasn't his first time and he didn't go empty the first time. Your mom is greedy.

johhnnie:



I sincerely hope that when the time comes that the man decides to take a second wife, you will happily quote that we are Africans.

And, that African culture/tradition supports polygamy.