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I Broke Up With Her - Family (11) - Nairaland

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Why I Broke Up With An Ex After Two Weeks / I Broke Up With Her Because Of Bleaching / I Broke Up With My Girl (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Broke Up With Her by ringi82(m): 12:45pm On Mar 04, 2021
Chris525:
iamafinegirl

I have read both sides of the story. Your man loves you and you love him too but you’re too protective of your own and yourself. That ends up making you selfish and self-centered which in the end would irritate the other party and in no time become reflective in the relationship. At the point when you both started staying together, you should have let alot of your guard down and try to warm up to the idea of a forever with him, you never did.

All the nasties you accused him of could have been true but I believe its a direct product of your lack of commitment & dedication to the togetherness. Considering your financial standing and the liabilities he was incurring, you should have been 100% responsible for food at least! How much are two working class people who are barely home going to eat in a month? The man pays rent, gas, power etc. on the same salary as you! I mean this man is buying new tv & all, you have the guts to bother him about blender, how much for blender? For your own kitchen?

You talk about him being broke before the 3rd. Yes, thats normal. Most of us men have to carry tons responsibilities from women, friends, family etc. We are always mostly broke. Na God dey help us. You say he’s got a 14M loan running and he hasn’t finished the house he should have etc. It will be bad for him if he has been squandering but that also reflects badly on you. Put him in a position where he looks back and says to himself I could never have achieved all of this without her. Be his partner not a competitor.

Why are you two building separate houses at this time of your lives. Looks like you lot are already preparing for the day you go your separate ways cus me I’m not understanding. You should be building a house together with y’all names on the papers. That would be your family home after that you can build for yourselves. Y’all have good jobs, na money dey shack una.

The man is the boss, you have to make him feel like it. My uncles wife will kneel down to serve him, call him Sir and all that. Na she dey control am� Whatever he wants to do if she doesn’t approve forget it. Who then is the real boss? Humble yourself, I know you can well survive without his money but its not always about that. He wants to buy car in naija, you think abroad is cheaper, he says he wants naija, leave him. Babe the gen is wet let it dry, even though you dont agree, e go still dry. Goan press phone if you’re bored. Stop being confrontational.

You no dey hear english can be worse than an insult when you’re intending to have the last word on a non-issue. It is annoying. Learn to understand your man, learn to be tolerant and you must compromise on certain issues but never lose your voice.

That marriage must happen this December. Na play una dey. All the best.

Well said..

1 Like

Re: I Broke Up With Her by 9jaRealist: 12:45pm On Mar 04, 2021
stupidmod3:
ur excuse are boring n lame

Quit being such a boring MISOGYNISTIC Richard-Heard...
How exactly is her side of the story an “excuse” or don’t you know what the term means?
>

2 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by eddyroyal(m): 12:45pm On Mar 04, 2021
Mindlog:
"We went for counselling and the pastors said she has to be contributing for expenditures in the house, we agreed on 60% to 40% sharing formula for all expenditures. So me as the man would contribute 60 while she will contribute 40"...Still imagining the Pastors doing the counselling, counselling a married couple or 2 people co-habiting? If it were professional therapists no issue with co-habitation but Pastors? shocked shocked
Cohabiting is not bad if they are not having sex. Maybe the pastors asked them and their response was negative.

1 Like

Re: I Broke Up With Her by simplesearch: 12:48pm On Mar 04, 2021
bet9ja:


You should not even complain of him seeing other ladies because that makes you sounds callous. So you expect a young man to stay for 2 years without SEX.... Fear God Na....

SEX reset Men's brain....

No SEX before marriage is a red flag. What do you expect from a relationship with no SEX. Even if you had this agreement with the most gentle guy in Nigeria, the end products will be frustration, unnecessary arguments, hatred and many more. This is the reason the commentators are raining insults on you because you have showed no commitment from the genesis of this relationship.

I AM SURE THAT YOU CANNOT SWELL ON YOUR HUMBLE SOUL THAT YOU HAVE NOT HAD SEX EVER SINCE THIS RELATIONSHIP STATED...

If truly you love him, I will advise you take this issue off the social media and sort things out with him...


Just look at nonsense advise. So no sex before marriage is jargon and somebody like you will want to make heaven when this is part of the criteria to making heaven.

2 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by 99thEnemy(m): 12:49pm On Mar 04, 2021
Iamafinegirl:
You would go out and meet the true definition of a Nigerian woman. Take care of her is what a man does, send her money for hair, dress, clothes etc.
And still buy food n do stuff.

don't worry, grin


Sapphiere

Zzor

Fati2001


will take good care of bwambasolomon grin grin grin

2 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by chinchonglee(m): 12:50pm On Mar 04, 2021
Iamafinegirl:

Lol... even him knows that’s not true
I m sure he didn’t mention that
Because he is sure I m a virgin and we was waiting for marriage to commence the do
Virgin korh!
Vagina nii!!
Madam leave that thing.
So after all those spendings, baba no see pvssy..
U actually met a fool.. a nonsense simp.
So after you guys go clubbing or so to catch fun, u go straight to bed wen u come back No sex. Jst like that...
Omo!
That guy na fool ooo.

2 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by Zane2point4(m): 12:51pm On Mar 04, 2021
cococandy:
please don’t be pressured into doing anything you don’t want to do.
Read your side of the story and all I can say is that you guys are not compatible.

Some guys will never acknowledge your financial contributions unless you’re giving them your pay and let them be the ones to decide how it will be spent. And to some guys, everything is an insult unless you’re 100% agreeing with them all the time. It’s not necessarily a case of who’s right or wrong. It’s plain incompatibility.

Good luck
The moment they started penning down and setting rules on how to handle joint money, i knew the relationship had thrown in the towel.

She could hv given a little more, also a good woman stops the man frm careless spending even if she know he is a careless spender. And vice versa.

Trust me they're too many responsibilities hanging arnd a man's neck, its never too easy, they earn the same pay but its very easy for a man to go broke if he doesnt manage blc of too many bills hanging arnd him, so its understandable why his money finishes before next pay day.
Even if u wana be frugal with your spending, at a point as a man you cant simply run away from them. If village ppl no call you, your family will, if family no call you, relatives will, your levies abi dues still deh everywhere deh wait.

1 Like

Re: I Broke Up With Her by Nobody: 12:51pm On Mar 04, 2021
Women are selfish but this ones own is overboard, selfishness (ur own is our own, and my own is my own)precedes the female gender, I swear that's y I like feminist to an extent, they are independent, if they like u, they like u, not just for the money cos they can take care of themselves, that's one part of feminism that women should internalize, feminism isn't bad at all yes I said it, but is.the.way. misandrists.has.hidden.under.the cover of.feminism.to.stir.men.hating among teenage girls dats d.problem, I had a cousin that came back from the UK and told me she's a feminist, I really started looking at her somehow and she was like" it seems i have a problem with feminism " after the conversation I knw me and her are now on different sides with our views but to say I hate feminism is overboard!
Re: I Broke Up With Her by tellwisdom: 12:51pm On Mar 04, 2021
Iamafinegirl:
Did you tell them that when we are talking
“You are not serious is a big INSULT for you”
Did u tell then that when u say I like trump and I say “me I hater trump because of this and that” it is already an offense and you admitted that maybe it’s true you having issues with me airing opinions because you are boss or what I don’t know? That was one day holyspirit made you admit...so you knew you had the issue all this while but you would be shouting I am the person arguing (I never knew different opinions was argument. I heard it first from you).
Did you tell them a simple conversation or difference in opinion even on a gist is an insult to you?

Did you tell them I think of quality and wen a frying pan was needed I was saying the new expensive ones sef are not good, they burn. Second new is better in this case and we got a second new one? Because it’s not necessarily about cost but most times you won’t even be able to understand the depth of what I suggest sometimes.

Did you tell them I explained something one day that I paid money to so and so person to avoid a problem and you tried to give me another solution to have taken and I was like “me I don’t want wahala oo thats why I did what I did@ and because everything is fight and arguement for you you had stood up stormed out of the house because you felt i said I don’t want your wahala etc when all I was saying is that I didn’t want wahala if d issue boomeranged and so I didn’t even look for other means I just did d surest method in question” did u settle down to listen or because you never patient and always ready to call everything an argument or fight you had kickstarted your nature?

Did you tell them you wanted a car and I said this car is too expensive tell someone who we know imports to bring for you although the person could delay and may change the car you agreed on but I said do a written agreement with him so it would be cheaper for you and that way he won’t do anything funny ? And you would spend less and get a better grade or level like the one I got instead of paying for something lower at the same price as the one you paid for in town. Out of love, did you not turn it to fight and say I am wicked, and louded the issue and dramatised it as being evil.
Did you tell them you lied to me that you don’t drink or smoke?
But you drink and lied from foundation of a relationship to win a girl?
When I realised out of anger I said you lied to me you don’t drink but you are a drunkard.
Did your remember saying my father who doesn’t drink at all and you know fully is the drunkard
You have called me demonic woman
You have called me stupid woman
You have called me very stupid woman
When you were trying to win me and I was saying no no I didn’t want, leave me and you were ever persistent didn’t I tell you I am scared the depth of what you feel is more of obsessive not love?
Then I should to shout I would say cause am not a lier that you should leave me, is it by force etc etc which u refer to today and I do tell you then your pressure was too much and I didn’t like you which is normal to any woman who didn’t initially like a man that kept pressuring her...knocking her gate over and over on different occasions etc.

The list is endless but if we discussing and you don’t understand what I am saying and I am frustrated talking and I say “you no dey understand English” you just flare up that that is a big insult.
Things that aren’t insults you made them insults to defend yourself.
Did you tell them the most times we went to Shoprite then I use to be the one buying things...and you usually pick nothing. So why should Shoprite be so expensive if I buy water “nestle water” and other things from there even before we ever dated and you used to follow me there to win me and I never asked you to pay for me or use you as a toaster?

Did you tell them that you are building and I am also building? And the months you spent all your salary not even on the building alone oo. Busy dashing people and at 3rd of the month you were broke and I was like how would we handle the house you said I am there and I held those months because that’s what a good woman would do.

Did you tell dem that wen you arrived at the counsellor we told them we had a 60k and 40k rule as at then but we just weren’t piling it in the same account and the pastor said ok we should do it as a joint account so no one would feel he is bringing all the money” and we stop spending differently. you told them it’s the pastor who proposed it or he told us that ok you people should just put the money in a seperate account and the wife asked what else is making you angry and you said contributions for repair should be added”.

Did you tell them that when your drivers license expired and there was a delay with joint account , you said you would keep some part of the contribution for where you stay but I must submit all my own contribution to your younger sisters account while you submit just some to her because you don’t trust me with money. The younger sister would now be the one dishing out the feeding money to me who is the one working? While you comfortably keep part of your contribution as a boss. Did you tell them I said you should give her all if i would also have to submit my own all to her since she is the chosen financial manager of our own institution so she can be dishing out money to both of us as at when due since distance is not a barrier to bank transfer so I would also monitor u because you don’t trust me with money and you want to monitor what I am eating when u aren’t even there with me.

Did you tell them you don’t live according to your means and you always borrowing and financing a lifestyle heavier than you inclusive of feeding (because you eat 70-80%) of all the food in the house? Did you tell them you have collected above 14 million naira loan and you haven’t completed any house you are building aside still having normal money people have used to complete their own houses.

Did you tell them you give them babes money and say send me your account number Cus I have seen it but to buy Apple extra for me out of a budget as per my love this one na for u from my pocket? Did you tell then as we came back from your location you had meeting with your babe asking if hostel has resumed and all by 6pm same day?

Did u tell them that I had been using clin-cap face cream, benzoxide peroxide face cream, and you have been using it with me and I have never said this cream is 2000 and the other is 1000 let’s contribute from budget but you bought olaybact for me 400 naira and you were balancing account for me?

Did you tell them I did a soap mix of 13000 naira to 15,000 naira and you have been lovingly using it With me since January and I have never in my life said your contribution for soap but you won’t even do it, if you did sef you would have been asking for money by now.

Did you tell them that even to buy apple while taking me to were you lived loveingly as per this is my new location has to be from the budget and that you couldn’t say babes aside this budget this for you?
Did you tell them I also contributed for the fuel as you were taking me lovingly to your new location? Location you dey go dey come yourself but as I go follow u go know d place I must pay for transport. I for kukuma just enter public transport. But I don’t even have a problem with that since that’s what he wanted. We just accounted for my path

Did you tell them...that I am not wasteful and you went ahead to do things you wanted to do and started blaming me for it. Like buying a new tv when your mum was around for them...knowing fully well I hardly look at a television and you did it for you and yours?
Did you tell them this girl who doesn’t contribute lovingly gives your sis money and also give your mum at least in the best way I can afford within my means but you no send me message so that’s my business you are not even seeing it. Na me send myself?
When last did you buy me a gift in a year and half? It was a wig when you were still trying to toast me. That was only when you were trying to win my heart.
Did you tell them you don’t do anything for me I don’t ask you for money for cloth, hair etc or my own fuel as I am a responsible adult and not a burden on a man which you know yourself. Did you let them know that the food you eat 70% of and the house repair you would do definitely if I am there or not is what you would always come and stand on my head for when we weren’t yet contributing in a joint account. Did you tell them you don’t take care of me and you are just so self centered about the feeding part because you eat more of the food? Yet I was still buying food oo no be say I go out and don’t bring anything to the house. I still buy meat, tomatoes, onion etc but maybe not just up to the person who consumes the 80%

Did u tell them d day you took me out and water was bought which was like two years ago was a special day I think maybe Valentine or my birthday or something and “I was only asking to be treated special”. As per today na correct day, spoil me na.
Did you tell them that I spoke of u buying some thing like blender or electronic because you need quality one to last. The cheap juicer bought did it last? No
Was there not finally a decision where the expensive “binatone” blender was picked because for some things, quality is important so it lasts?
Did you tell them I met condoms in your other room and you alleged it’s your boss that came to your house to use it? Because you couldn’t tell him no?
Did you tell them that if I want to do something you would use my car and if you want to do something you would use my car and I said love should cover all this there should be no differentiating of car for activities and you can use mine when you want and viceversal?

The day he said I said drug was too expensive did he tell you he spent all his income that month already by 3rd or so due to poor planning and I used my income all for the month for food. Ofcourse I am sure he borrowed as usual for fuel for his car that month and maybe some extra things like suya etc you may want to eat and that’s why I couldn’t afford to buy that cream or is it even tablet I desperately needed quality type of drug to treat that ailment because it use to be stubborn when it comes but couldn’t afford it that month ?

In addition I forgot. The generator I would tell you to put on when wet had a generator house while some or most Nigerians just make a metal cover or so for their generator. So rain fell and the splash I could look wasn’t much and I would say it’s not like water entered this thing in its house like Dt just few splash on surface. I owned a generator I ran without it having issue before meeting you and while you where toasting me. I didn’t know I am unqualified to run a gen. I stopped touching your gen because it was complain upon complain or I am arguing with you by having a different opinion about ah it’s small splashes. Ofcourse if a gen was drenched would I with my full senses say lets put it on? When Nigerians keep their gen outside with normal cover. The days rain was so much and it drenched, we carried out the gen outside to air.

You would go out and meet the true definition of a Nigerian woman. Take care of her is what a man does, send her money for hair, dress, clothes etc.
And still buy food n do stuff.
You would remember I was never a burden on u
I hope you would have love enough for her to cover taking care of her abi u would start complaining and shouting on her too. I just hope you don’t faint then.

On the other hand I Wld meet the true definition of Nigerian man who knows he is to care at least and would appreciate that I am blessing and a good woman and not the typical African woman wen I also take up things at home. Simple

Shuttup.. .That guy is your god. Worship him.

1 Like

Re: I Broke Up With Her by Rawhumper(m): 12:53pm On Mar 04, 2021
To be candid., this your swearing doesn't hold any water. Women are good at swearing even when caught red handed. So drop this issue and lets focus on the important ones. Cos I for one, dont believe you till I confirm it.

I have had experiences where girls claimed to be virgins, yea I confirmed and some were true while others I didn't know when it entered and they were already wet and very slippery.

Its only a very naive and gullible guy that will be carried away by women antics undecided.

All in all, I see you to be a nice lady that needs a guy with a matured mind and reasoning.(Am a blunt guy, didn't say that to make you happy but its just what I perceive)










Iamafinegirl:

I swear before God and man Dt I haven’t had sex
Not just since the relationship started but from birth

1 Like

Re: I Broke Up With Her by simplesearch: 12:53pm On Mar 04, 2021
Iamafinegirl:

I swear before God and man Dt I haven’t had sex
Not just since the relationship started but from birth


I didn't read your side of the story before. Nevertheless not engaging in premarital sex is good,keep it up. But co-habition is also bad so work on yourself and get your apartment, pray to God to lead and guide you, from their make an informed decision.

2 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by 9jaRealist: 12:54pm On Mar 04, 2021
Chris525:
iamafinegirl

I have read both sides of the story. Your man loves you and you love him too but you’re too protective of your own and yourself. That ends up making you selfish and self-centered which in the end would irritate the other party and in no time become reflective in the relationship. At the point when you both started staying together, you should have let alot of your guard down and try to warm up to the idea of a forever with him, you never did.

All the nasties you accused him of could have been true but I believe its a direct product of your lack of commitment & dedication to the togetherness. Considering your financial standing and the liabilities he was incurring, you should have been 100% responsible for food at least! How much are two working class people who are barely home going to eat in a month? The man pays rent, gas, power etc. on the same salary as you! I mean this man is buying new tv & all, you have the guts to bother him about blender, how much for blender? For your own kitchen?

You talk about him being broke before the 3rd. Yes, thats normal. Most of us men have to carry tons responsibilities from women, friends, family etc. We are always mostly broke. Na God dey help us. You say he’s got a 14M loan running and he hasn’t finished the house he should have etc. It will be bad for him if he has been squandering but that also reflects badly on you. Put him in a position where he looks back and says to himself I could never have achieved all of this without her. Be his partner not a competitor.

Why are you two building separate houses at this time of your lives. Looks like you lot are already preparing for the day you go your separate ways cus me I’m not understanding. You should be building a house together with y’all names on the papers. That would be your family home after that you can build for yourselves. Y’all have good jobs, na money dey shack una.

The man is the boss, you have to make him feel like it. My uncles wife will kneel down to serve him, call him Sir and all that. Na she dey control am� Whatever he wants to do if she doesn’t approve forget it. Who then is the real boss? Humble yourself, I know you can well survive without his money but its not always about that. He wants to buy car in naija, you think abroad is cheaper, he says he wants naija, leave him. Babe the gen is wet let it dry, even though you dont agree, e go still dry. Goan press phone if you’re bored. Stop being confrontational.

You no dey hear english can be worse than an insult when you’re intending to have the last word on a non-issue. It is annoying. Learn to understand your man, learn to be tolerant and you must compromise on certain issues but never lose your voice.

That marriage must happen this December. Na play una dey. All the best.

Primitive sexist clap-trap (and please spare us the lame “culture” excuse)...
If the man is truly the so-called “boss”, then he should do as bosses do and take care of everything without whining like a little b. SMH

Meanwhile, they are BOTH “too protective of theirs and their own”. Not just her, otherwise dude wouldn’t have come here with this epistle...
Ultimately, everything that I have read from BOTH sides shows an INCOMPATIBILITY (plus a seemingly insecure dude). Bin the relationship.
>

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Broke Up With Her by Rawhumper(m): 12:55pm On Mar 04, 2021
To be candid., this your swearing doesn't hold any water. Women are good at swearing even when caught red handed. So drop this issue and lets focus on the important ones. Cos I for one, dont believe you till I confirm it.

I have had experiences where girls claimed to be virgins, yea I confirmed and some were true while others I didn't know when it entered and they were already wet and very slippery.

Its only a very naive and gullible guy that will be carried away by women antics undecided.

All in all, I see you to be a nice lady that needs a guy with a matured mind and reasoning.(Am a blunt guy, didn't say that to make you happy but its just what I perceive)












quote author=Iamafinegirl post=99597757]
I swear before God and man Dt I haven’t had sex
Not just since the relationship started but from birth [/quote]
Re: I Broke Up With Her by medriano: 12:55pm On Mar 04, 2021
You have absolutely no business being with this woman. You both aren’t compatible.
It’s clear she won’t support you in the home front. I don’t get the part where she said “buying stuff at certain places” is what makes you classy.....wow!! That’s low self esteem to me though. Guess she’s one of those doing the “I belong thing”
I must commend you for agreeing to the “no sex” before marriage ��I’m not in no way against those that are involved in premarital sex....whatever works for you.
You have done what is expected of a man. Imagine having to buy new things when you could have easily moved the old ones to your new place. You deserve better!!
Re: I Broke Up With Her by 9jaRealist: 12:55pm On Mar 04, 2021
tellwisdom:
Shuttup.. .That guy is your god. Worship him.

Along comes yet another PRIMITIVE sexist! angry
>

2 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by evil1: 12:58pm On Mar 04, 2021
Shes not ready mentally and so are you.

One thing I hate in a relationship is comparing who does something more.

the truth is if we are dating don't choke me, at least help out mentally, emotionally and physically.

my presnt partner does all of this for me and I thak God for her.

1 Like

Re: I Broke Up With Her by Regex: 12:58pm On Mar 04, 2021
stupidmod3:
konji nah bastard

Ah swear
Re: I Broke Up With Her by 9jaRealist: 12:59pm On Mar 04, 2021
Rawhumper:
To be candid., this your swearing doesn't hold any water. Women are good at swearing even when caught red handed. So drop this issue and lets focus on the important ones. Cos I for one, dont believe you till I confirm it.

I have had experiences where girls claimed to be virgins, yea I confirmed and some were true while others I didn't know when it entered and they were already wet and very slippery.

Its only a very naive and gullible guy that will be carried away by women antics undecided.

All in all, I see you to be a nice lady that needs a guy with a matured mind and reasoning.(Am a blunt guy, didn't say that to make you happy but its just what I perceive)

Meanwhile, Nigerian men are known for their truthfulness and probity...
Unfortunately, these are the sorts of crude MISOGYNY most Nigerian women have to deal with. SMH
>

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I Broke Up With Her by SweetCunt97(f): 1:03pm On Mar 04, 2021
Bola146:


Na them lipsrsealed, even if it's handwork, go and learn, no matter how little, don't be jobless. Carrying Brazilian hair on empty coconut undecided Olodo rabata
You a very big foool. Who do you think you wanna disguise for? Ode oshi
Re: I Broke Up With Her by evil1: 1:03pm On Mar 04, 2021
Truth be told even if I'm not happy with what most women do I still want to hear her own side.

you have just shared the sweet part of your own story.

let me hear her own side.

1 Like

Re: I Broke Up With Her by 9jaRealist: 1:03pm On Mar 04, 2021
Akakanfirstclass:
mehn!!!...

so in summary..

a true Nigerian man should be doing all d taking care of a woman's diz and dat..

and a true Nigerian woman should just be demanding for care ?...

If this is true..
as I wan go masters for Ukraine so..
I dey come back with a true European woman..


They say ‘ignorance is bliss’... grin grin grin

You think Nigerian women are materialistic....
But you want Eastern European women? Talk about pot-to-fire! LMAO
>

3 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by eastgates1: 1:04pm On Mar 04, 2021
Just do you, give her a break. She is an entitled person who would leave you as soon as something gets wrong. Expect to carry all the load if you marry her. You are an adult make up you mind. Your life your responsibility.
Re: I Broke Up With Her by 9jaRealist: 1:04pm On Mar 04, 2021
evil1:
Truth be told even if I'm not happy with what most women do I still want to hear her own side.

you have just shared the sweet part of your own story.

let me hear her own side.

It’s on page 2 or 3 of the thread...
>
Re: I Broke Up With Her by Amhappy(f): 1:06pm On Mar 04, 2021
This relationship should remain ended please. Hook up with other people. You are not bad people rather incompatible. Do this and know peace.
Re: I Broke Up With Her by zyzxx(m): 1:08pm On Mar 04, 2021
Chris525:
iamafinegirl

I have read both sides of the story. Your man loves you and you love him too but you’re too protective of your own and yourself. That ends up making you selfish and self-centered which in the end would irritate the other party and in no time become reflective in the relationship. At the point when you both started staying together, you should have let alot of your guard down and try to warm up to the idea of a forever with him, you never did.

All the nasties you accused him of could have been true but I believe its a direct product of your lack of commitment & dedication to the togetherness. Considering your financial standing and the liabilities he was incurring, you should have been 100% responsible for food at least! How much are two working class people who are barely home going to eat in a month? The man pays rent, gas, power etc. on the same salary as you! I mean this man is buying new tv & all, you have the guts to bother him about blender, how much for blender? For your own kitchen?

You talk about him being broke before the 3rd. Yes, thats normal. Most of us men have to carry tons responsibilities from women, friends, family etc. We are always mostly broke. Na God dey help us. You say he’s got a 14M loan running and he hasn’t finished the house he should have etc. It will be bad for him if he has been squandering but that also reflects badly on you. Put him in a position where he looks back and says to himself I could never have achieved all of this without her. Be his partner not a competitor.

Why are you two building separate houses at this time of your lives. Looks like you lot are already preparing for the day you go your separate ways cus me I’m not understanding. You should be building a house together with y’all names on the papers. That would be your family home after that you can build for yourselves. Y’all have good jobs, na money dey shack una.

The man is the boss, you have to make him feel like it. My uncles wife will kneel down to serve him, call him Sir and all that. Na she dey control am� Whatever he wants to do if she doesn’t approve forget it. Who then is the real boss? Humble yourself, I know you can well survive without his money but its not always about that. He wants to buy car in naija, you think abroad is cheaper, he says he wants naija, leave him. Babe the gen is wet let it dry, even though you dont agree, e go still dry. Goan press phone if you’re bored. Stop being confrontational.

You no dey hear english can be worse than an insult when you’re intending to have the last word on a non-issue. It is annoying. Learn to understand your man, learn to be tolerant and you must compromise on certain issues but never lose your voice.

That marriage must happen this December. Na play una dey. All the best.

@ Iamafinegirl pls follow this advice

You living with him without enjoying wife benefit and he is already responsible as your husband brings out the monster (other side) of him

1 Like

Re: I Broke Up With Her by ikdaddy01(m): 1:12pm On Mar 04, 2021
You guys should just take a walk
Re: I Broke Up With Her by Obimiz: 1:12pm On Mar 04, 2021
Bro, lots of guys here have said alot and don't want to add but just a question....

Hope she left the house with just her bag?

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Broke Up With Her by 9jaRealist: 1:13pm On Mar 04, 2021
bwambasolomon:
I have a fiancée whom I started dating about two years ago. We work together and we are on the same level, and earn the same salary. Each time we hanged out to just have fun, if we got to a place where prices were too expensive, I would say to her but this things are much cheaper elsewhere.

For example, we went to a place though inside the same premises, one part of the lounge sells bottled water for 250 while the other one sells bottled water for 500, she then suggested that we go to the part where water was sold for 500. Note that it was in the same premises and there was absolutely no difference between the two, it's not like one was VIP area and the other was not. We ended up going to the 500 naira side. All that we ate which of course was double the price, I paid.

Each time we went to the mall, we buy things normally. But there's something about malls which some of you may have noticed, certain things such as pots, plastic rubbers, electronics, and so on are usually unreasonably exorbitant. So I said it would be better for us not to buy things that were too expensive that we could get outside for cheaper prices, but we could buy other things whose prices were reasonable. The next thing she started saying was that I don't have class, it's classy people that buy such things.

So one day we went to a pharmacy in that same mall, because she wanted to get some drugs, the price they called for her was about three times what it was outside, so she said it was better to go outside to buy it. So I just told her that since she has class she should buy it now, the next thing she started insulting me, she gave me the insult of my life. That wasn't the only scenario, there were many other cases like that.

She had started to stay with me after a while. Every thing in the house belongs to me, and I made sure everywhere was conducive for us. Air conditioners every and so on, good house, good compound, surveillance cameras and so on. Initially I was shouldering all responsibilities like food, the car washer who washes the both of our cars, the security man, fuel in the generator, NEPA light, repairs in the house and so on.

Please note that we work in the same place and earn same amount. Sometimes when I was short of cash, since I knew that her own money would still be there, I would borrow from her to buy food stuffs and other miscellaneous, and pay back by next salary.

She contributed just about 10% of expenditures in the house which was majorly just food stuffs. Note that I buy much more foodstuffs 5 times more than what she buys.

That was not just it, the relationship was usually filled with arguments, I can hardly have a conversation with her, she would begin to argue.

I want to ask few questions here:
(1)please is there anyone who doesn't know that Egusi causes pimples for those who are prone to having pimples?
(2) Is there any one who doesn't know that if something is very hot, it is not advisable to put in the fridge?
(3) here anyone who doesn't know that garlic is medicinal?
(4) Is there any one who does not know that it is not advisable to put on a generator when it has been drenched by rain?

But this girl will argue with me, insisting that I must put on the gen when rain has beaten it, because apparently, it is not her property. And the fridge is also not hers which is why she won't care if it gets spoilt. In short there's usually too much argument over what is clear for everyone to see, thereby it is always difficult to have a conversation with her.

I was later transferred out of the state we were, so I decided that because of her, I won't take anything away from the house, I would buy everything I need in the new place I had been posted to. So I bought a bigger TV for the house we both shared and took the smaller one to my new place of posting. I bought my mattress, kitchen utensils, got an apartment, and bought every thing I needed in the new place. So now, I have most things in two pairs, just so she would be comfortable.

Please note that we aren't yet married, and I agreed to not having sex with her because that was she wanted, I respected that. The only thing I know we do was romance.

So I started insisting that it was high time for her to be responsible, that we can't both be working and she won't be buying reasonable amount of food stuff because I noticed that sometimes, she would go out and buy 3 packs of spaghetti, which doesn't make sense to me. She said her dad is the one that buys food stuffs in her house and her mum contributes for petty projects. But I am not her Dad, I have my own mind. Also note that she didn't volunteer to bring any amount for my project oo, because I won't want a woman to contribute 1 naira to the houses I am building. All I said was that she should be contributing reasonable amounts for food stuffs in the house. We hardly stay two weeks without fights, she must look for one insult or the other.

We went for counselling and the pastors said she has to be contributing for expenditures in the house, we agreed on 60% to 40% sharing formula for all expenditures. So me as the man would contribute 60 while she will contribute 40. Please note that rent was not inclusive, as I volunteered to pay for the rent in the house we were and for my apartment in my new place of posting.
Later on, when she began to see the brunt of the responsibilities that I used to bear she started saying we (Me and the Pastors) are forcing her to contribute. But I didn't know these Pastors before, that was my first time of meeting them, she was the one who knew them before me. But simply because they told her the truth, she started saying we are forcing her.

Please I need your honest opinions on this issue.
Thank you.

I truly never get folks who come to whine on Nairaland...
Did anyone hold a gun to your head to spend anything? SMH

It seems many Nigerian men can only get/impress women by spending money...
Sad commentary on such men, but they should at least be smart enough not to spend more than they can afford.

Instead, about every relationship post on Nairaland...
Is invariably some dude b*tching that he spent so much on some female. Whiny men are such a bore.

>

2 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by mt77: 1:16pm On Mar 04, 2021
I was nearly deceived after reading the man's side of the story . It's sad people don't know what they have until they lose it. The man doesn't seem to appreciate the worth of the lady. It's frustrating being in a relationship with one that doesn't appreciate you Stay away from irresponsible and unreasonable people to avoid heart aches

2 Likes

Re: I Broke Up With Her by tosan245(m): 1:16pm On Mar 04, 2021
"Smokers are Liable to die young" that's the warning sign on Cigarettes Packs similar to your case, the warning sign is "Marry her at your own Peril".

Bro, Flee.

bwambasolomon:
I have a fiancée whom I started dating about two years ago. We work together and we are on the same level, and earn the same salary. Each time we hanged out to just have fun, if we got to a place where prices were too expensive, I would say to her but this things are much cheaper elsewhere.

For example, we went to a place though inside the same premises, one part of the lounge sells bottled water for 250 while the other one sells bottled water for 500, she then suggested that we go to the part where water was sold for 500. Note that it was in the same premises and there was absolutely no difference between the two, it's not like one was VIP area and the other was not. We ended up going to the 500 naira side. All that we ate which of course was double the price, I paid.

Each time we went to the mall, we buy things normally. But there's something about malls which some of you may have noticed, certain things such as pots, plastic rubbers, electronics, and so on are usually unreasonably exorbitant. So I said it would be better for us not to buy things that were too expensive that we could get outside for cheaper prices, but we could buy other things whose prices were reasonable. The next thing she started saying was that I don't have class, it's classy people that buy such things.

So one day we went to a pharmacy in that same mall, because she wanted to get some drugs, the price they called for her was about three times what it was outside, so she said it was better to go outside to buy it. So I just told her that since she has class she should buy it now, the next thing she started insulting me, she gave me the insult of my life. That wasn't the only scenario, there were many other cases like that.

She had started to stay with me after a while. Every thing in the house belongs to me, and I made sure everywhere was conducive for us. Air conditioners every and so on, good house, good compound, surveillance cameras and so on. Initially I was shouldering all responsibilities like food, the car washer who washes the both of our cars, the security man, fuel in the generator, NEPA light, repairs in the house and so on.

Please note that we work in the same place and earn same amount. Sometimes when I was short of cash, since I knew that her own money would still be there, I would borrow from her to buy food stuffs and other miscellaneous, and pay back by next salary.

She contributed just about 10% of expenditures in the house which was majorly just food stuffs. Note that I buy much more foodstuffs 5 times more than what she buys.

That was not just it, the relationship was usually filled with arguments, I can hardly have a conversation with her, she would begin to argue.

I want to ask few questions here:
(1)please is there anyone who doesn't know that Egusi causes pimples for those who are prone to having pimples?
(2) Is there any one who doesn't know that if something is very hot, it is not advisable to put in the fridge?
(3) here anyone who doesn't know that garlic is medicinal?
(4) Is there any one who does not know that it is not advisable to put on a generator when it has been drenched by rain?

But this girl will argue with me, insisting that I must put on the gen when rain has beaten it, because apparently, it is not her property. And the fridge is also not hers which is why she won't care if it gets spoilt. In short there's usually too much argument over what is clear for everyone to see, thereby it is always difficult to have a conversation with her.

I was later transferred out of the state we were, so I decided that because of her, I won't take anything away from the house, I would buy everything I need in the new place I had been posted to. So I bought a bigger TV for the house we both shared and took the smaller one to my new place of posting. I bought my mattress, kitchen utensils, got an apartment, and bought every thing I needed in the new place. So now, I have most things in two pairs, just so she would be comfortable.

Please note that we aren't yet married, and I agreed to not having sex with her because that was she wanted, I respected that. The only thing I know we do was romance.

So I started insisting that it was high time for her to be responsible, that we can't both be working and she won't be buying reasonable amount of food stuff because I noticed that sometimes, she would go out and buy 3 packs of spaghetti, which doesn't make sense to me. She said her dad is the one that buys food stuffs in her house and her mum contributes for petty projects. But I am not her Dad, I have my own mind. Also note that she didn't volunteer to bring any amount for my project oo, because I won't want a woman to contribute 1 naira to the houses I am building. All I said was that she should be contributing reasonable amounts for food stuffs in the house. We hardly stay two weeks without fights, she must look for one insult or the other.

We went for counselling and the pastors said she has to be contributing for expenditures in the house, we agreed on 60% to 40% sharing formula for all expenditures. So me as the man would contribute 60 while she will contribute 40. Please note that rent was not inclusive, as I volunteered to pay for the rent in the house we were and for my apartment in my new place of posting.
Later on, when she began to see the brunt of the responsibilities that I used to bear she started saying we (Me and the Pastors) are forcing her to contribute. But I didn't know these Pastors before, that was my first time of meeting them, she was the one who knew them before me. But simply because they told her the truth, she started saying we are forcing her.

Please I need your honest opinions on this issue.
Thank you.
Re: I Broke Up With Her by davit: 1:17pm On Mar 04, 2021
Her defence doesn't add up at all.
Re: I Broke Up With Her by LordReed(m): 1:20pm On Mar 04, 2021
Rapfrick:
that girl is Everyman dream girl you guys should stop painting her black

Yeah I saw the purported girl's response later. I should known the story was too one sided.

1 Like

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