₦airaland Forum

Joel.:
@pontentpraise


what i see in you is a clear failure of an helpless syconphant, who want money but afriad to pick it from the floor, with no doubt i can see you are interested but you are fearful and too dumm, i just pity how you go about writing a thread about to be successful and also those that we bother to read it,

and again i will describe you as a temtation, who only aim is to cause destraction and bring down the divine plan, afterall when Jesus stand out to be somebody great He too got opposers, you are not deferent , if you are not in then kick out no need for stories.

I am not a false prophet or seeking a ministry of a piramise. Where the top enjoy and the down suffered.

Everybody are the same, we are meant to serve and help each other just like as Jesus christ did. No body is greater but are to play by the ethics and rules if you are not satistfy you can go.


What make you think it has something to do with black magic? Thats why i said we are not faithless and fearful like you, you claim to read and know the bible but you dont have faith in it.


Again i did not make any mention of cult or frathanity, i dont know where you get that from, i would advise you read the post again, i said brotherhold.


Our aim is to establish a believers fellowship bond by ethics and power, yes secret, why i said secret is that we are spiritual being and need to have coding formula against nagetive force.
Maybe you are one.

Like as i have told you, i am not going to disclose any formula or scribture to open forum not even to you. The best i can do, already i have dont that.

We are very well prepared to woship in possitive and in prayers, not nagative things or rituals. Infact dont make me think you are the judas as its always normal have one or a sent negative agent to desolve this plan but you have failed already big time.

Bye

I think you are one the deceivers of modern history, i need not to exchange words with you but establish an argument with facts.

Can you explain the following text from this link: https://www.nairaland.com/1184516/today-omnipresent and how it establish this thread?

Joel.:
Now, i can see somebody is about to go mad,

yes, i do go strans on consciously and picture out things that i cannot really understand or interprit.

Do you understand what you picture out on each vision you see? Also do you received vioce message? I use to hear a vioce vision like name calling or thing like that, if i study alot about spirituality it happens frequitely.

But what is most important now is that i need money furtune, i want power to gain success and over principalities and demons.
I need a group or found a group to control powers.

The highlighted portion reflect your desperation for money and history has always have it that those that tread in your path have not only ruin themselves but those that foolishly follow them.

I pity those you will mislead to believe in vanity

Joel.:
i cant answer your question here cos its a public forum and no amount of words can convince a guy like you so dont press further, beside that you are not capable to join my group and we dont want some bounch of faithless guys.

Its fear that kill the cat, fear is what make all the poor men remain where they are today.


When you talk about the bible then you have to start with the jews mythology, cos that is where it all begin, the jew just like others ethnic in the world who have various myth they believe in, on how it all started, but they are the oldest and first civilize people to have recorded the mytheology.


my question is who documented it in writen? My view is that it must start with a hearsay, because the Jew came into being when GOd visited their father abraham who reside in Ur an aribian nation over 4000 years ago, there are not much details given in this visit about what was the communication entails, my though was abram must have ask who are you and how do i believe that you are the true creator.


You see anybody or gods can claim to be the creator.

But Because this men are uncivilize they believe anything just like that.

And we are told the Bini empire edo state has substain one thousand and something years now it comes from somewhere they too have a mytheology.

To be continue

I am not bother with what your intention is if you had not advocate for follower-ship. While i strongly believe that this will lead to nothing other than you will wet the appetites of those interested to no avail. I want to use the medium also to open others who do not know anything about what you are doing and might sought another options once your plan failed.

All you have said was nothing but Abraham history/introduction of Islam. Initially i was thinking you were talking about how Abraham and the Jewish people secure their success and wealth, but i see that, you just went talking about those things that are irrelevant to my questions other than secret spiritual meaning. There is nothing like fraternity that you are talking about in the bible and those that have been stupendously rich and successful in their endeavors have followed biblical open spiritual code or meaning.

All i see is that you are formulating a non existing principles except adding black magic and covering it with bible to call it biblical secret code. We have lots of false prophets doing that and we all see their ends. If you need clearer understanding on how the Jewish became successful and their descendants have been doing ok, even though they did not out-rightly believe in the bible, i will tell you in my next post to come, if you ask; because its long and if any man follow the same principles he will be successful and do not think its hard, but challenging.

Also the highlighted portion of your text begs for clarification: To say Abraham is uncivilized is like saying Albert Einstein is uncivilized because he lived in 19 century. Abraham and his descendants never just believe in anything. You mean, believing in anything is believing in God that parted the Red Sea, the God that appeared to Abimelech and Pharaoh when they collected Abraham's wife Sarah, the God that told Abraham that Sodom will be destroyed; the God that appear to Jacob and told him he will go with him and bring him back to his father's land, the God that said he will bless them and actually blessed them and protected them from all evils? Then the Egyptians would have kept them for life and enslaved them if all they believe was anything.

Joel.:
Now, i can see somebody is about to go mad,

yes, i do go strans on consciously and picture out things that i cannot really understand or interprit.

Do you understand what you picture out on each vision you see? Also do you received vioce message? I use to hear a vioce vision like name calling or thing like that, if i study alot about spirituality it happens frequitely.

But what is most important now is that i need money furtune, i want power to gain success and over principalities and demons.

I need a group or found a group to control powers.

Hmmmm now i see. It looks as if you are desperate for change, power, affluence, influence and control.
Desperation is the greatest time bomb to human's endeavor. Please be patient and take time to find the inner man in you and listen to him very very well before making a drastic decision that will not only ruin you, but forever torment you and all that are associated to you.

Take time to interview people who have had wealth, power, influence and control and let them tell you the intriguing aspect of what you are desperately looking for. I mean those with past glory not the current ones, because the current ones will not be honest with you.

Joel.:
@potentpraise

what rat, and what is your fears?
And is anything wrong with that?

i do not want to prejudge you, but one thing is clear that either you or the people that are pouring their allegiance don't really know the in-dept of what you are asking for.
Before i comment in details i have few questions for you.

1. How do you intend to get power, get strong energy, drive favor to yourself without blood?
2. What experience have you got to think you can initiate a fraternity of such?
3. How do you intend to invoke secret hidden riches and power through the biblical scripture?
4. How do you intend to get your connection, power and favor
5. where in the bible is what you are proposing can be referenced to?

Joel.:
@goshen

its just like having a strong energy force within you, a backup power to get riches and protection against negative forces and your wealth.

Having respect, connection, command and authorities. Power to attract favor and goodluck, breaking poverty bonage and family course. much stronger energy force to excel in life, having energy powers and authority over local powers, Having a centra temple gathering for fellowship and your personal secret room and alter, it has nothing to do with blood, blood sacrifices or such, but only burning of incense, candle and offering etc, a strong prayer formula and reciting words, all words and practices will be taken from the bible, it will be scriptural, we are children of GOd, but we will discover the hidden secret to get riches and power, non of our members will be poor, we will concor the world as we grow further.

Its all about positive. This is public forum and i cannot say much here. Looking forward to more serious people only.

i can smell rat... secret altar and bible and burning incense

Its so interesting to hear from you guys that Christianity is easy than Islam.

I strongly disagree with you to say its easy than Islam.
You might be talking about pagans who don't go to church but attends once or twice a year.. watch-night/crossover to the next year and Easter or during church event services

But for the real Christ-like people, you would just be making mockery of their sacrifice.

The bible say pray without season..i guess many of you have not see when Christians pray and sweat... the exercise is physically exhausting but spiritually gratifying.
The Christians that actually pray, pray without season, while at work, driving, walking, eating and in all form of activities and before any of the activities.
While this form of ritual does not necessary means that they are holy or will get to heaven, it not an exercise to call a lazy man devotion.

So doing the same thing five times everyday that does not require you loosing some fat, can not be considered hard-work, but a lesser ritual compare to those who are Christians.
I have watch many imam with keen interest, none i have seen sweat while preaching, but look at many of our christian pastors, when they preach, the way you see them sweating while preaching is how they pray when not preaching.

So Christianity is not easy and those that follow it wholeheartedly will strongly smile when you say its easy? You can imagine boko haram killing christian brothers and sisters and no retaliation, try that with some of our Muslim brothers in the North and they know its Christians that have done such act, you will see how they will kill both pagans and church attendants. If you say its easy, then you are saying its easy to see your brothers killed and not retaliate? Its the grace of God that help those Christians to hold themselves and control their emotion through biblical injunction.

There are many examples and you will know that, some of the Christianity that is being played today, its mostly artificial of the original Christianity that Jesus taught, very few pastors of today, can pass through 1% of what Jesus and his disciples did in their time. Think and think again if you are considering easy religion

goldylock: If it were Islam thing now una go start to dey disturb person from thursday with how good islam is. Well today is sunday look for a christian thread and put on the frontpage too! Even if it is have you praised him today?

I think we could have one of the following on the front page:

1. Song of praise
2. Daily devotion
3. Bible Study or a brief discussion on a bible passage
4. Word of encouragement

The treads that go in line with above suggestions could be placed on the front page. Putting four threads of such is not bad, especially if we have more than a enough circular threads placed on the front page during the week

I.M.E.:
comfort and peace of mind. no matter what the physical body can be killed but only God can kill both body and slow.
T.L♥√ع.F.

Yes you are right.. We have consolation through the words of God. A huge comfort that the world can not give nor medical prescription drug can guaranty.
Through this we can live in heaven on earth, having the assurance that its all temporary before we meet him and see him face to face

The comfort of being a Christian

A. Its not that we will not pass through tribulations, sorrow, pain and fire, he that called us says: “2 When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.”(Isaiah 43:2)

B. Its not that we will not be sick, but he that called us says: “14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”(2 Chronicles 7:14)

C. Its not that we will not be afraid, but he that called us says: “6 Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.”(Deuteronomy 31:6)

D. Its not that we will not be financially broke, but he that called us says: “19 But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”(Philippians 4:19)

E. Its not that we will not fall into sin, but he that called us says: “18 Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.”(Isaiah 1:18)

F. Its not that we will not be barren, but he that called us says: 14 Thou shalt be blessed above all people: there shall not be male or female barren among you, or among your cattle.(Deuteronomy 7: 14)

G. Its not that we will not experience ups and down, but he that called us says:” 5 Every valley shall be filled, and every mountain and hill shall be brought low; and the crooked shall be made straight, and the rough ways shall be made smooth;”(Luke 3:5)

H. Its not that we will not experience hatred, but he that called us says:” 23 And I will beat down his foes before his face, and plague them that hate him.” (Psalms 89:23)

I. Its not that we will not have enemies, but he that called us says:” 22 The enemy shall not exact upon him; nor the son of wickedness afflict him.”(Psalms 89:22)

J. Its not that we can not be with him in heaven, but he that called us says:” 15 I pray not that thou shouldest take them out of the world, but that thou shouldest keep them from the evil.
16 They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world.”(John 17:15-16)

K. Its not that he can not take pain and weakness away from us, but he that called us says: “9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”(2 Corinthians 12:9)

Affiliated: While the venture is not easy, most of the work has already been done by white men of ages past

Its like saying Most of the work for advertising for Insurance plan has been done by the inventors if you are just venturing into selling insurance or saying, its easy to combat the devil or any anti christian spirit?
If it was that easy i think you might just venture into it and tell me in a year time, how you made it through?

Affiliated: To be successful in any endeavor you have to understand the fundamental and dynamics of whatever you want to partake in. This is a thread where people can give advice on how to be successful pastors and eventually nairalanders can buy jets too.
I'll start. The aim of what you want to do is to collect people's money. NEVER FORGET THAT. However, play on people's emotions in such a way that they would be willing to give the money and would even die to defend their right to pay you.

Its so sad if all we see in all aspiring pastors is the ultimate aim of collecting money. What happen to those that preach repentance, salvation, holiness and godliness? Not all the aspiring pastors are aiming to collect money nor all the current pastors are money prostitutes. We should all note that many of these money grabbing pastors failed in their quest to establish churches, you could imagine how many churches will be available if all the aspiring pastors willing to grab money had not failed. Sometime we all think its easy to just go out there and play on people's emotions, i bet you if it was easy, you would by now had become a pastor.

Lets face reality, there is no venture under the earth that is easy, even tax collecting or yahoo yahoo.

On the picture, the same reason God did not just destroy the devil, its the same reason, he would not immediately destroy Pharaoh.
We should all know that God does not think like man, even though we are created in his image, he does what he like and want, just as every human being.
So there couldn't be any justification on the assertion in the pic.

Logicboy03: People drink more in a recession.
People normally shout halleluyah in church when the pastor talks about a big sucesss

Yes all because the economy is bad. If the economy is going well, i can assure you more than 50% of the people that go to shout Halleluiah would be sleeping on sunday after working so hard to make good money monday-saturday

Logicboy03: Summary;

Bars;
-Provide people with alcohol to escape the stress and misery of life
-Provide people with entertainment to escape the stress of life
-Provides a place people can meet friends and chat.


Churches
-Pastors preach hope for those who are down
-Provide people with reassurance that god is working for them
-provide entertainment for people on sunday
-provides a place people can meet partners, friends and business associates
-provides a place where people can worship the wealth of a pastor

Its hard to conclude that they worship the wealth of a pastor. You should note that unlike U.S Nigeria have very very few motivational speakers, i think pastors have double role with this. However, in summary, fewer people would attend church if the economy was ok, but lots of people would drink if the economy is ok

It is increasingly becoming obvious that the two fastest growing endeavours in Nigeria today are churches and bars, at least in the Southern part of the country, where the Islamist fundamentalists, Boko Haram, are not bombing churches and bars. If you have been observant, you will notice that the number of churches and bars in your neighbourhood has increased tremendously in the last five years.

Companies close shop and churches or bars take over their spaces. Until 2009 when the Central Bank of Nigeria came down hard on banks, they were the ones taking over every available space in Nigeria, so as to be called the biggest bank or the bank with the highest number of branches. These days, once a building or a piece of land is put up for sale or lease, chances are high that it is a church that will acquire it.

On the other hand, once a canopy is erected in front of a house on a central road or street in a neighbourhood, you can be sure that a new bar has sprung up where people will gather every evening to drink. Even in early January when many people usually still try to keep a resolution not to drink alcohol, or when many people are still recovering from the high amount of money they spent during the Christmas/New Year period, such roadside bars are still filled with patrons every evening. Interestingly, I have never seen any roadside bar that seems to be experiencing a lack of patronage, including those that operate beside dirty, stinking gutters.

Why are churches and bars booming at a time businesses are hurting and dying? Many reasons are responsible for this. First is that the Redeemed Christian Church of God’s vision of having a church within a walking distance of its worshippers seems to have thrown a challenge to other churches. Every church now also wants to have a branch close to its members.

Second, when all hope seems to be lost, the church provides hope to the faithful. The words of a minister reassure people that all is well no matter how dark the clouds are. Many pastors have also noticed that pastors who focus on prosperity have mammoth crowds; therefore, many of them have jumped on the bandwagon of prosperity preaching. Those whose businesses are struggling or have collapsed, flock to churches in search of their own breakthrough. It is said that when an economy is buoyant or life is rosy, many people think less of God. It is when things are bad that many people remember God and need Him to help them.

There is also the fact that churches help their members find jobs, business, spouses, among others. Many people have such needs and they flock to churches to find solutions to these needs. Friends and contacts are also made in churches which prove useful in life. The more people troop to churches to solve these problems, the more churches expand.

In addition, many pastors lay special emphasis on tithing, and consequently use Malachi 3:10 to instil fear into their congregation. This portion of the Bible says that those who don’t pay their tithes rob God and will consequently receive hard times in all their endeavours, but those who pay their tithes will receive an open window from God, from which He will pour down His blessings upon them. Even the older churches that never preached tithing have joined in preaching tithing as a compulsory Christian doctrine. In addition to tithing, many churches lay great emphasis on giving – seed-sowing, offering, seed of faith, covenant seed, dangerous giving, donation for special projects, etc – through which churches receive huge sums of money in comparison to what obtained in the past. This makes expansion easier.

Also in the past, being a priest was synonymous with poverty. It was seen as a calling, because only someone with a high conviction would choose the poverty, extreme self-denial, a life of service, risk and pain that were associated with priesthood. Priests were expected to live a life similar to that Jesus Christ and His apostles lived: a life of lack and service with no amassing of wealth or flamboyance. But given that many pastors are rich and flamboyant these days, being a pastor has become attractive. Many young people are daily pouring into the seminary or Bible college that it is difficult to know those who had a divine call and those who are just changing businesses. The effect is that churches build more branches to find places for the large number of ministers, while individuals who don’t want to be part of any of the existing churches open their own churches in their neighbourhoods, thereby increasing the number of churches.

In the case of bars, it is a fact that when many people record achievements, they celebrate with alcohol; and when they are hit by hard times, they drink more alcohol in an attempt to drown their sorrow, even if temporarily. Many people simply bury their problems in alcohol: a kind of escapism. As people’s debt mounts, as they are unsure of how to pay the next rent or children’s school fees, many resort to alcohol.

Money problem is also a huge source of marital crisis. Rather than drive home to face the anger of their wives for several hours, many people prefer to hang out with their friends in bars and return home only when it is bedtime, cutting down on the period they will spend with their wives before sunrise when another working day beckons on them to escape from home again.

The more people seek to drink, the more owners of bars smile to the bank, and the more new bars open to attend to the need of more drinkers.

Ironically, in spite of the massive expansion in churches as well as a rise in religious activities in Nigeria, there is a drop in values, morality and godliness. The Nigerian of today is less trusted internationally than the Nigerian of pre-1990. The Nigerian of today has a higher chance of demanding a bribe or giving a bribe or cheating another than the Nigerian of pre-1990. It therefore points to the fact that the expansion in churches and rise in religiosity have little to do with spreading the gospel of God and more to do with pecuniary consideration. But that is not to say that there are not many men of God whose desire in church expansion is driven purely by a need to win souls who will be godly and therefore great citizens.

The bitter truth is that countries don’t become great as a result of an astronomical rise in churches and bars. That companies are folding up and churches and bars are growing should sound a warning to the government that all is not well with the Nigerian economy. The economy needs to be revived so that those who want to worship God will worship Him in truth and spirit, not because of those material things that they believe they will get from Him, but because they are convinced that He is worthy to be worshipped. In the same vein, those who want to drink alcohol will drink it as a choice, not as an escapist mechanism from hard times.

http://www.punchng.com/opinion/while-businesses-struggle-churches-and-bars-boom/

What do you think? We are building more angels with church and devils with Bar?

It is increasingly becoming obvious that the two fastest growing endeavours in Nigeria today are churches and bars, at least in the Southern part of the country, where the Islamist fundamentalists, Boko Haram, are not bombing churches and bars. If you have been observant, you will notice that the number of churches and bars in your neighbourhood has increased tremendously in the last five years.

Companies close shop and churches or bars take over their spaces. Until 2009 when the Central Bank of Nigeria came down hard on banks, they were the ones taking over every available space in Nigeria, so as to be called the biggest bank or the bank with the highest number of branches. These days, once a building or a piece of land is put up for sale or lease, chances are high that it is a church that will acquire it.

On the other hand, once a canopy is erected in front of a house on a central road or street in a neighbourhood, you can be sure that a new bar has sprung up where people will gather every evening to drink. Even in early January when many people usually still try to keep a resolution not to drink alcohol, or when many people are still recovering from the high amount of money they spent during the Christmas/New Year period, such roadside bars are still filled with patrons every evening. Interestingly, I have never seen any roadside bar that seems to be experiencing a lack of patronage, including those that operate beside dirty, stinking gutters.

Why are churches and bars booming at a time businesses are hurting and dying? Many reasons are responsible for this. First is that the Redeemed Christian Church of God’s vision of having a church within a walking distance of its worshippers seems to have thrown a challenge to other churches. Every church now also wants to have a branch close to its members.

Second, when all hope seems to be lost, the church provides hope to the faithful. The words of a minister reassure people that all is well no matter how dark the clouds are. Many pastors have also noticed that pastors who focus on prosperity have mammoth crowds; therefore, many of them have jumped on the bandwagon of prosperity preaching. Those whose businesses are struggling or have collapsed, flock to churches in search of their own breakthrough. It is said that when an economy is buoyant or life is rosy, many people think less of God. It is when things are bad that many people remember God and need Him to help them.

There is also the fact that churches help their members find jobs, business, spouses, among others. Many people have such needs and they flock to churches to find solutions to these needs. Friends and contacts are also made in churches which prove useful in life. The more people troop to churches to solve these problems, the more churches expand.

In addition, many pastors lay special emphasis on tithing, and consequently use Malachi 3:10 to instil fear into their congregation. This portion of the Bible says that those who don’t pay their tithes rob God and will consequently receive hard times in all their endeavours, but those who pay their tithes will receive an open window from God, from which He will pour down His blessings upon them. Even the older churches that never preached tithing have joined in preaching tithing as a compulsory Christian doctrine. In addition to tithing, many churches lay great emphasis on giving – seed-sowing, offering, seed of faith, covenant seed, dangerous giving, donation for special projects, etc – through which churches receive huge sums of money in comparison to what obtained in the past. This makes expansion easier.

Also in the past, being a priest was synonymous with poverty. It was seen as a calling, because only someone with a high conviction would choose the poverty, extreme self-denial, a life of service, risk and pain that were associated with priesthood. Priests were expected to live a life similar to that Jesus Christ and His apostles lived: a life of lack and service with no amassing of wealth or flamboyance. But given that many pastors are rich and flamboyant these days, being a pastor has become attractive. Many young people are daily pouring into the seminary or Bible college that it is difficult to know those who had a divine call and those who are just changing businesses. The effect is that churches build more branches to find places for the large number of ministers, while individuals who don’t want to be part of any of the existing churches open their own churches in their neighbourhoods, thereby increasing the number of churches.

In the case of bars, it is a fact that when many people record achievements, they celebrate with alcohol; and when they are hit by hard times, they drink more alcohol in an attempt to drown their sorrow, even if temporarily. Many people simply bury their problems in alcohol: a kind of escapism. As people’s debt mounts, as they are unsure of how to pay the next rent or children’s school fees, many resort to alcohol.

Money problem is also a huge source of marital crisis. Rather than drive home to face the anger of their wives for several hours, many people prefer to hang out with their friends in bars and return home only when it is bedtime, cutting down on the period they will spend with their wives before sunrise when another working day beckons on them to escape from home again.

The more people seek to drink, the more owners of bars smile to the bank, and the more new bars open to attend to the need of more drinkers.

Ironically, in spite of the massive expansion in churches as well as a rise in religious activities in Nigeria, there is a drop in values, morality and godliness. The Nigerian of today is less trusted internationally than the Nigerian of pre-1990. The Nigerian of today has a higher chance of demanding a bribe or giving a bribe or cheating another than the Nigerian of pre-1990. It therefore points to the fact that the expansion in churches and rise in religiosity have little to do with spreading the gospel of God and more to do with pecuniary consideration. But that is not to say that there are not many men of God whose desire in church expansion is driven purely by a need to win souls who will be godly and therefore great citizens.

The bitter truth is that countries don’t become great as a result of an astronomical rise in churches and bars. That companies are folding up and churches and bars are growing should sound a warning to the government that all is not well with the Nigerian economy. The economy needs to be revived so that those who want to worship God will worship Him in truth and spirit, not because of those material things that they believe they will get from Him, but because they are convinced that He is worthy to be worshipped. In the same vein, those who want to drink alcohol will drink it as a choice, not as an escapist mechanism from hard times.

http://www.punchng.com/opinion/while-businesses-struggle-churches-and-bars-boom/

What do you think? We are building more angels with church and devils with Bar?

Maria Peyer and Mike Bixby are one of those couples who just seem made for each other. They hold hands when they sit and talk. They're happy to spend the morning cooking brunch with their children in their home in southern Washington.

Bixby and Peyer have known each other since they were young, but got married only a few years ago."It just hadn't been the right time, until it was. God bless Facebook," says Peyer.

"She Facebooked me, and asked if I remembered her, and then it just went from there," Bixby says.

But there's one big issue where they do not see eye-to-eye. Peyer is Lutheran. Her father, grandfather and great-grandfather were all pastors. She's an assisting minister. Bixby is an atheist.

"I do not believe that there is any sort of a higher power. I've made several attempts to go back and have faith, and it just doesn't work," he says. "It's not an open question for me anymore."

"I would really like it if he could feel God's love the way I do. And it's one of those very few places where I feel like I can say, 'I hear you, I understand what you're saying, I love you and I think that there may be more to it,' " Peyer says.

They do find ways to come together. Bixby even goes along to church every now and then.

"I hear it a lot from Maria, 'You're very spiritual in this way,' and 'You're very spiritual in that way.' And a couple days ago, I kind of joked with her, 'That is a very secular humanist attitude, and that shows a lot of growth, a lot of not faith,' " Bixby says.

Bixby and Peyer may disagree about faith but they share common values. Even in their vocations — she's an oncology nurse, and he teaches fourth grade.

"Mike works with kids that come from really hard places. And I work with people that are dying of cancer and living with cancer," Peyer says. "And for me to do that as a Christian person, for Mike to do that as an atheist, wouldn't look a whole lot different if either one of us were the other."

"Maria's faith plays a role in making her the person that I love, and I'm good with that. I think we're both the people who we are because of her faith, because of my lack of faith, and I don't want to change that," Bixby says.

In the past, people in relationships like this often would make a change — whichever person had the stronger conviction would set the terms. But these days, people are redrawing the lines.

"These families are doing something different, and they're making their own choices," says Erika Seamon, who teaches religion at Georgetown University and studies interfaith relationships. She sees couples find common ground on love, ethics and even spirituality while maintaining very different religious identities.

"What it's doing is it's mixing up, confusing and blurring these ideas of religion, and community and affiliation and ritual and faith," Seamon says.

She says that couples who do it successfully use the tools you might expect.

"They listen and they talk and they try and understand one another. A number of them mentioned humor," she says. "You could probably take that list of advice that they would give and use it for any situation, whether it's religion or just raising children or getting along in the world."

Because Bixby and Peyer got together just a few years ago, they didn't have to hammer out a compromise on the kids. Hers from a previous marriage are being raised Lutheran, his don't go to church. But these tools — communication, humor and compassion — help them work through their differences on other aspects of faith. And it's work they're grateful for.

"It's not a 'what should we have for dinner' kind of question. It's a 'this matters,' " says Peyer. "Dinner matters, too — often a lot — but we don't fight about dinner. And we don't fight about this. It has very much helped me clarify what's true for me."

Adds Bixby: "If I was a different type of nonbeliever, and Maria was a different type of believer, then that would be a very different question."

"I can love you and think you're wrong, and you can love me and think I'm wrong," Peyer says. "So I appreciate this opportunity to grapple with it, and I appreciate you for being the one I get to grapple with it with."

And grappling together, for Bixby and Peyer, looks a lot like love.

http://www.npr.org/2013/01/17/168954402/making-marriage-work-when-only-one-spouse-believes-in-god