₦airaland Forum

Gayatri:
I do not know how to start this but i will write as it comes... I was in a 2 year relationship that ended in march this year.. I was so commited in it like naturally when im dating, i DO NOT notice other guys and i DO NOT ask my boyfriend for financial assistance because i feel im not his responsibility,, what i do appreciate mostly were little things like, chatting, kindness, hugs, opening and closing of doors for me,, just little things, coz i adore them so much.. But anyway it ended.. And i vowed never to date again come what may.. During the break up process, all my friends (guys, hardly have a girlfriend) were there to help me pull through.. Calls and texts constantly because, according to them, they knew my type, thus the help.. Funny enough, i never got attracted to any of them (even the ones that initially asked me out when my friendship with them was fresh) and im not the sex sex type to just fall for any to satisfy my desire.. Though i got advice from neighbours to find someone else than staying alone, i said no especially as i am a loner but a happy loner.. I keep myself busy with work or any stuff that makes me happy.

Fine, two months later (june), some guy reached out to me even as he knew he's got a girlfriend, whixh according to him later, they were in an open relationship.. He stays in oshogbo, his girl stays in kaduna while im in sagamu..Before then, he reached out online by first stalking me on facebook (even though we did same online business), after a while he got talking with me.. At first, i was harsh, very harsh to him but he never minded.. At a point i stopped talking to him.. A month later he reached out again, asking if we were still friends.. I was like yeah, not nice to him at all but he was patient with me..

From mid-july we started talking well as friends, he was very open as i was to him. We flowed well that things were happening to us coincidentally.. Whenever he yawns, i do at my place, if im having a scratch, he does too.. There was just plenty of this connection that we never got tired of each other.. In the procesa of our been honest, he told me about his girl and how she was still keeping her ex and all whatnots... I didnt feel any iota of jealousy because i had not feelings for him yet.. I asked to talk things through with his girl and he says well if she gave the chance.. So laters, by august, september,october, feelings grew.. He got so fond of me... According to him, he has not seen my type before.. Fine! During my birthday, he wanted to do something for me, i said no, then two weeks to his birthday in nov, he asked that i visit him at their family house, that i did..

What struck me most was how the elder brother (married) took care of me... I was not allowed to do nothing.. The brother even cooked for me.. God, it made me fall more for the family.. The kind gestures i have never experienced in my life.. There are kindnesses but there is kindness, the real one.. I felt it.. Every thing that i want in a man, those little things, this guy has them all.. According to him, it baffles him that with the little he shows me, i do not take for granted even before he told me he's having a girl..

When i returned home, we continued our normal talks and he then said, that his girlfriend would be visiting during his birthday.. At that point i went silent.. (Meanwhile he met his girl this year but before me, also during her break up).. He was unhappy that i displayed this little jealousy.. So he says he has not broken up with his girl to start a new relationship and he is hurting that he is hurting me.. He's got feelings for me but he loves his girl.. So i said i was going walk, even though i never meant it, twas hard to even say that but i had to and he says no... That he's become so attached to me even his family thinks he's dating me.. That he controls his feelings for me, could i do same and i said no.. I could not be friends with him when i know that feelings are involved.. Finally, we came to terms to just flow with things since he was not engaged or married to her.. Even so, this guy just lost his job and he says unlike his girl, im the one pushing him to have something doing, he says i help him alot but i wouldnt know.. So we continued to let the whole feelings to flow until last week, when with my help, he was called for an interview in lagos..

As usual we talked and i wished him well.. I always pray for him.. In lagos, we talked well until the third day, our communication changed and before it did, my heart was literally aching, so i knew something was wrong.. I called to know why but he was telling me that he'd let me in when he got back to oshogbo, which he did.. He said his girlfriend who was having something to do with her ex, called him and wanted to settle things with him.. But the truth is, because this lady already had his facebook password when they were together in kadauna, she 3 days before her birthday on the 8th of this month wanted to know why her boyfriend was no longer perturbed over her behaviour, so she saw my chats with the guy and decided to do something,,, this now pushed to talk things out with the bf and apologise to him.. Then she asked him if anything was going on between is and he said no.. That we just friends,close friends.. He lied to her but opens up to me.. He says he doesnt want the girl to ask him to cut me off totally.. So the whole thing got him confused.. He says he's never double dated and he isnt happy that he's hurting me and im taking it... I asked him again if i should walk and he says no.. He does not want to lose me and i do not want to lose him either but i want to prove my love for him so that he one day sees that the girl, probably loves him but she's got no integrity.. And i purely love him.. But because i respect his relationship, i CAN NOT TELL HIM TO BREAK UP WITH HER but wanting him to see things himself but the question is for how long.. He says they are working things out now but he doesnt want to lose me esp as a friend... Difficult.. Out of God knows what, we agreed to let things flow since i will respect his relationship, like whenever his girl is around, i should make him believe that i will be fine.. Now, he isnt happy because he said if he hadnt met the gf, he'd have gone ahead to date me.. For me, i cannot sleep, ive been typing this since God knows when and this is 3:36am.. Since he is confused now, please people, friends, family, can i use love to make him see the difference between his girl and me.. He loves his girl, he is controlling his feelings for me and afraid to let it grow because he knows we'd bond, while my feelings toward him is real.. Money has not been involved in this.. We are 6months now.. I believe in true love and that it does not come easy.. Talk to me Y'll because i have no parents to talk to,, i would have talked to my mum now but she isnt here... I want to win with true love.. I turned 27 this past november and he turned 30 same november.. Thank You and God bless..

You two might love each other genuinely, but that doesn't mean you'll end up together. That's the reality. According to your thesis, it sounds like true love. But life is not Mara and Clara or Boys over flower.
You are single and he hasn't chosen you, go out and mingle. Who knows, that might help him to make up his mind faster.

Jodha:
None of the above...how will someone have me as a wife and still masturbate ...ko possible now...

Why not

juju2008:
My dear ASUU is not heartless! The FG is criminal and need to be held accountable. Lecturers allowances had been withheld for over three years. Their salaries have been withheld for months. Meanwhile our elected politicians smile home with millions and billions that they don't deserve.They know what to do but instead prefer to keep dribbling the country with their truck load of lies. May God help us in this doomed country.

ASUU or FG, none is better than the other.

janvier27:
Govt has been owing the paltry allowances from 2013 to date despite all pleas. Now there's a strike for some months & people are saying they shouldn't be paid for the months of strike. How pretentious & callous can we be. Put mouth together & tell government the truth, no we won't do. That's why this strike will last another one year if we all continue on this path.

Who are the people responsible for putting such evil Governments in power that only the students deserve to lose out all of the time?

It's time for ASUU to lose something too.

Saintinoo:
I also wish they pay before suspension of strike, but this is government, in every agreement, government seems to claim tobe right. Lets watch and see.

Between is there any news about new meeting date?

What about the meeting ASUU turned down saying they got a short notice?
ASUU is not serious. They are just waiting for the big payday. Previous Government shouldn't have taken it easy with ASUU with regards to paying salaries after strike. FG must show them something this time around even though it will waste more time, but it will save more in the future.

The Legislative arm of the Government should wade into the matter by consulting the constitution maybe ASUU should be paid those salaries or not.

Ababbio:
The Academic Staff Union of Universities (ASUU), has denied that it reached an agreement with the federal government to end its ongoing strike on December 9, 2020.

The Union insisted that contrary to insinuation to that effect, there was never an understanding with the government that it would suspend the over 9 months old action on the said date.

President of ASUU, Prof. Biodun Ogunyemi in a statement made available to newsmen Wednesday night, said ASUU representatives do not have the powers to suspend or call off industrial action but must follow due process which includes transmitting the outcome of negotiations to members and National Executive Council (NEC) of ASUU for further deliberations and actions.

While noting that ASUU was willing to cooperate with concerned authorities to ensure suspension of the strike once the welfare and wellbeing of ASUU members and survival of public universities were sufficiently guaranteed, he said It was a needless crisis which had happened because the government consistently failed to faithfully implement the Agreements it freely signed with the union.

In his words: “The leadership of the Academic Staff Union of Universities (ASUU) has been inundated with enquiries on why the ongoing strike action has not been suspended. This was sequel to the widely reported claims by some government agents that all the demands of ASUU have been met and that the union agreed to suspend the strike action today, 9th December 2020. Nothing can be farther from the truth!

“To put the records straight, the Principal Officers and Trustees who constitute the core of representatives of ASUU at negotiation meetings with the government are not constitutionally empowered to suspend any strike action. Whatever comes out of an engagement with agents of the government is an offer that must be taken back to the branches through the various organs of the union.

“Views and perspectives on offers by governments are aggregated and presented to government agents as counter-offers. This trade union strategy of offer and counter-offer is continually deployed until the National Executive Council (NEC) of ASUU – consisting of all recognised chairpersons – finally approves what it considers an acceptable offer from the government. It is only then that any strike action by ASUU can be suspended.

“ASUU members, as stakeholders in the Nigerian University System, are equally worried and embarrassed that those in the position of authority, over the years, displayed seeming indifference to the rot and decay in Nigeria’s public universities. We think it is not too late to do a rethink. We believe if there is the will, there will be away".


Source: https://insidenaija.com.ng/fg-lied-we-didnt-reach-agreement-to-suspend-strike-dec-9-says-ASUU/

IPPIS is the reason for the strike.

Sex for grades, grades for cash, deliberately failing students to prove unnecessary points.
Having 4 hours contact lectures with students instead of 26 hours in a semester etc are just one of the few rots and decays in Nigerian public institutions.

This Biodun talks too much.
Don't suspend the strike if you like

BlackManta:
Away straight win when Liverpool don qualify already as winners of their group...Liverpool go rest many senior players cuz they go play Spurs this weekend. This match is not important.

Chelsea wey qualify since last week no be 1-1 dem play yesterday as they no take their match seriously.

Liv is playing Fulham this weekend

Almajiri scheme

bahaushe1:
Hilarious! FGN will pay salary arrears and earned allowance this month.

Unless Ngige wants to pay from his pocket.
ASUU can still get November and December salary if they call off the strike now. Other than that, they are on their own regarding that of previous months.

What are we now?

DamZik:
FG should keep her "tabled an offer" and pay ASUU their salaries. What is difficult in this? Does the money belongs to Buhari's father or family?

ASUU won't get fully paid.
Go and revise section 43 of the trade act dispute.
When NMA and some health workers went on strike around 2017 or 2018, they lost some of their salaries too while fighting for what they think is right. That's one of the few sacrifices one has to make when fighting this evil government.
So this time around, ASUU will lose something, it won't be only the students who will lose as usual.

So next time, ASUU won't be so eager to run away from work.

November 2018 to March 2019
March 2020 to December 2020
Just look at the number of months within how many years?
Are they the only FG employees?

If they are not ready, they should stay at home, if they are angry they should submit their resignation letters.

mujibson:
Why shouldn't ASUU get paid before calling of the strike? When the government know they will still pay the allowances and salaries why did they fail to respond to ASUU for 8 months, they have to wait for protest before calling for talks on an agreement they failed to meet. I'm a student too but let's not be economical with the truth and learn to hold our government accountable.

I'm glad you have your own opinion.
But even at that, unless you volunteer to pay ASUU, if not, there's nothing anyone can do.

If they call off now, they have the opportunity of receiving November and December.

DamZik:
ASUU will be ready when FG is ready.

FG is ready and have tabled an offer. ASUU either take it or stay at home.

ejibaba:
Oga, I don't even know where you belong. All I will say is this...If you support this government to destroy education, generation yet unborn will curse you in your grave.

That i don't agree with the way ASUU is going about the matter doesn't mean I'm on the Government side.
Both ASUU and FG are destroying education in their own various ways.


If ASUU get fully paid for the time they spent at home, then they won't hesitate to go on another strike next year knowing fully well that they have nothing to lose.

21cents:
So,.what now??

Whenever ASUU is ready, they will go back to work.

bahaushe1:
Yeah. There is no need for any meeting. If Ngige is serious let them pay salaries and eaa. The strike will be called off the next day.

Which Salaries?
The EAA is a must and it's been taken care of. But i don't think FG is owing ASUU any salary.

They should get paid while on strike, so that next year they will be eager to embark on another one knowing fully well that it won't affect their salaries.
Who will compensate the students for the time wasted?
As long as ASUU keeps engaging the federal government with a method that is detrimental to the progress of students, and doing that annually. Then they are nothing but selfish and the students won't be on their side. That's not to justify the carelessness of the FG too

ejibaba:
They were paid November salary....

But IPPIS or not is no longer part of the problem even though it's the sole reason for the strike.

Fabunmi okemesi
Others are Dagunro and isakaba

Boko Haram Ambassadors

21cents:
just got news that the meeting has been suspended indefinitely. don't know how credible it is tho.

There is no need for any meeting again.

ejibaba:
Ode human being....why did they pay those that joined IPPIS but were also not teaching?

Even those ones when last did they get paid?
FG still paid some, even those who didn't register on IPPIS till August which is a big mistake on the Government part.

For now, section 43 of the trade act dispute should be spelt out loudly for ASUU.
And should be made aware that starting from now till when they decide to go back to work, FG is not owing them any salary

RealEzee:
big boys and Chelsea don't fit in the same sentence abeg, leave me to kuku face europa

Life itself is seasonal.
Man u is no longer part of the big boys, just like Arsenal.

When you dine with a whale, thinking "Celebrities" pussies are tastier.

Thank your star your mother is alive to protect you

Raylight2:
simply because the states would benefit from the fund through TETF

Unilorin didn't get an exemption from it in those days too.
Along the line, i think their lecturers just thought they would benefit a lot from the time off during any strike afterall it won't affect their salaries, that's why they are now a party to it.

sinkhole:

"FG have refused to pay our members, strike continues indefinitely, might last for 4 years , section 43 of the trade dispute act doesn't apply to us, we are above the Law"

Might be something like that

Rilwayne001:
LAUTECH just announced resumption BTW

I blame the state Governors for allowing the various state universities in their states to be shut till now.

Freestainworld:
If they write like this, how will they make their cash, their writing is for medical personnel consumption alone just the way a lawyer will blow his grammar and his colleagues will understand.

Lol, you are funny. It's as a result of the process.

We all had good handwriting in primary and secondary schools na.
You can't answer 5 questions with subs including diagrams in 20 minutes and have time for graphic designs like this.