rampagain:

even if he just lost his job yesterday,he shouldnt put his family burden on d girl,or make it look as if its her right to put food on his table

if she continues like this ,how will she save enough to even give her siblings  five naira?

im not against dating or being wt broke dudes(even though i pray i wont find my self wt such,thank God) but when d man sits back and does nothing because d babe is busy sponsoring him and his family,even though hes not bought a single coke for my siblings ,then im out


talo je mbe?whos claiming equal treatment?count moi out o jare

we are basically saying the same thing.As long as the man is employable and taking steps towards getting a job,l'll manage with him
But if he sits around eating puff puff and waiting for me.
na that time I go tell am say difference dey between love and lovu

Ruby_Pearl:

Hey, we want equal treatment abi?
So, why can't women wear the pant in the r/ship for once?
Don't complain, let me see that bright smile

lookie here, my little sis
If any man comes trekking towards you with no employment.
Cast him out like a demon
Tell him I sent you
na love you go chop?

rampagain:

if i were to be married to this guy,and then along d way he falls into d hands of financial difficulties,i will gladly help

if i were to be dating to him,and then he gets broke,i wouldnt want to leave d relationship because of d finance,but i will if and i repeat if d guy sees it as "girl its ur right to take care of me,afterall u r going to be my wife"  then im walking d hell out


watch out and see if that guy will remain wt u when he makes it

jenny I'm with you here.
I wouldn't walk out on a husband or fiancee or even a boyfriend that falls on hard times as long as he's making efforts towards getting a job.
Then again,I wouldn't with my korokoro eyes seek to be entangled with a jobless man.
No money no love.
I wish I knew what this lady's situation was.
Was he unemployed from the get go?

come o
where does this unemployed lover live?
In his mother's house?
at 31?
Lord have mercy!

A-40:

I would have called the dude a gigolo but he is slightly older than you but gosh at 31 i would play the devil's advocate here and tell you to dump him quick fast or at least give him an ultimatum

Like what?
get a job today today or be gone?
LOL

RichyBlacK:

We won't miss you! You can go vote for McBush!

I'm tired of all these greedy and selfish Republicans like _Queeniusha whio tacitly imply that "if you're poor then it's your fault because our God is a God of riches".

Republicans, the anti-bailout people, but they are ever willing to bail out rich Wall Street goons.

I have nothing against rich people. I make >>> 250k and will gladly pay more taxes in an Obama administration than pay less in a McBush administration.
Yawn. Let me go to https://donate.barackobama.com/ and give my third $50 donation this month.

[size=18pt]Obiden 08![/size]

Of course if you make a whole lot more than $250,000 by your admission with no wife and children to support, but ocassional Somalian ashewos here and there ,you have more spare change than you can handle.
A lot of men are not in that category.
They have  actual mouths to feed and kids to send to college.
You cannot compare yourself to the average man.
what do you know about manly responsibilities
nonsense!

She logged off before answering my simple question.

If the guy just recently lost his job,I don't think it's enough reason to dump him if he's a great guy.She must have benefited from his handouts too while he was working.
Women have this tendency to cry foul when the tables are turned meanwhile they'll have no problems chopping off the guy in his good times.
Hopefully you can also graciously accept it when you get dumped by the new boyfriend,should you lose your job.

!f the guy has never worked since you knew him,why complain now?
You obviously knew his financial situaton before accepting his hand of lovership
You got into the relationship with a 31 year old unemployed man,you can get out when you're no longer able to support him.
Personally I would not have dated an unemployed 31 year old man talk less of handing out money not just to him but his family also.
This guy is just a boyfriend,not even a fiancee.

SeanT21:

Haha. I am 18 years old and into Politics.

The funny thing is, I use to work at[b] Chuck E Cheese a few years back.[/b]

I'm that good

SeanT21:

Ok, I understand Your point but it will not affect me becasue I am still a teenager!!!

OMG
I'm chatting with someone that could be my offspring?
perhaps making minimum wage at Chuck E cheeses?
what do you know?

davidylan:

McCain is still running ads lying that Obama's proposal aims to increase taxes for the middle class. Is that man such an obnoxious liar or what?

That's a blatant looking at the comparison.
In his plan.the middle class will definitely get less  money than MCains plan but they will not be paying more than they're already paying.

Donald trump does not make $250,000.
He's not middle class.
$250,000 is a middle income salary.
An average physician with a school teacher wife will make that amount easily.
It's not a lot of money after he's paid his $150,000 school loan and hers plus a hefty ,malpractice insurance.
People look at the raw figures and forget that the average people with that salary owe money to get there.

Either way we look at it,MCain has a better tax plan for everyone in a nut shell.
Obama just wants to give a whole lot more to the lower income class than MCain and tax the upper class a whole lot more than MCain.
Either way the wealthy is paying more.
I don't think they should pay more than they're already paying
That's enough to change me over to MCain

@ joichi,how long have you been with this guy and when was the last time he worked?

davidylan:

Where are the men to tell us what married life is like?

I wonder.
josh josh already said a little.
Where are all the men hiding their marital status
I won't mention names

rikkyjen:

So Osisi went to CU? . Did you?

CU I meant was Christian union AKA NIFES
not that new university that started d after my time.
I went to a proper University

yemivictor:

Yar'adua is purportedly running the country on someone else's kidney & still won't quit!

I can't laugh jare!!

let the person ask for their organ back

SeanT21:

WEll, They have more money than the average Man.

and so what?
they worked hard to get there.
you folks think $250,000 is a lot of money.
not when you have school loans and kids who you hope to send to college.
this is unfair
they're already paying 35% of their income in taxes ,why punish them more?
they typically spend more too and put in more money into the economy through property taxes and indirect taxation.It'll be unfair to punish them.
go MCain!

RichyBlacK:

Obama will raise taxes for those making $250,000 or more. That's a minority group and they do not need any tax breaks whatsoever!

It has nothing to do with working hard, it has everything to do with balancing the budget. The wealthy must pay more, it's not a new concept. The existing tax code makes it such that the higher you earn the more tax (percentage) you pay.

Minority group indeed.
people in those tax brackets usually also have higher expenditures.
They should not be robbed to feed the rest of soceity
They already pay more,they don't need to pay anymore than they're already paying.
well people would just put their money away in tax shelters.

Found it.
It's clearer now.
Obama's plan won't punish me and my oga as I thought.http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/story/2008/06/09/ST2008060900950.html

but MCcain will certainly put more money in my pocket.

I hear there's a site that compares both tax plans,can someone post it,if they have it.

[b]After careful look at the Obama tax plan,I'm beginning not to have the love for my Obama that I earlier did.
MC Bush is becoming attractive to me.
The only deciding issue for me is the taxes.[/b]Anyone who will increase my taxes has lost my vote.
My Oga works too hard to have a lot of our income  end up at the feet of the federal Govt.
That is unfair.
To punish those who have suffered,sweated and denied themselves things just to get ahead.

@ Gucci did you see the other one about a woman who actually caught her man in bed pants down with another female
Not all marriages are good and some are worse than others.
Sadly women in Nigeria have to deal with so much and most of the ones in unhealthy marriages stay because of lack of finances and soceital stigma as do many women all over the world esp the lack of finances part.

@ gamine,these are just 2 of the several from unknown names.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-165735.0.html#msg2728916
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-52335.0.html#msg1097492

So Gamine now that you've graduated, you can start looking carefully.
If he comes riding in an Okada nko?

Gamine:

Leilah And SistaWoman are not Nigerians.

i guess that spells a lot

There are tons and tons of threads from Nigerians about their spouses.
The only difference is that they come in with new names most of the time.
We've had threads about cheating spouses,physically abusive,husbands not talking to wives,mother in law issues and I bet they were from Nigerians

Brash!:

u sef sabi sista-woman?!

LOL
how about Leilah who's told us everything from her non loving husband to his painful anals with her.

Brash!:

una just dey scare person with all this marriage talk!

scare ke?
we are telling the hard truths.
It's a learning process and it starts with picking the right spouse.
Not everyone in shokoto is marriage material

Gamine:

No nairalander will come and say

this n that is wrong with their marriage.

Everyone wants you to believe its all smooth sailing on the Caspian sea.

You've not read from sistawoman then.
I hope I didn't give the impression anyway that i'm living in gloryland
I emphasized several times that marriage is a lot of hard work,a lot of give and take,a lot of seflessness is required.
You make your mistakes and learn
I made loads and still make them.
But I am happy with mine.
If I had to do it over again,it'll be with the same man.

Ruby_Pearl:

Thanks. Night.

Oya, oyinye, take Queenisha's place. I got more questions for you

oya onyinye na you get the mantle now.

Ruby_Pearl:

You mean my aunt?
Yea, the lady goes to nigeria like every month or so.
Her 2 children stays with their father but comes here every summer.
She just had a baby. I don't think that man dares to cheat on her.
Is he mad? Play with my family? Then he best move out of the town.
LMAO! I meant the woman.
What if she's gone for days. . . .how does she keep her man in line?

how can you keep someone in line when he's thousands of miles away?
how can he "keep her in line"
I'm not a believer in long distance marriage.
It's not for me.
when people decide to do marriage across rivers and oceans,they should take whatever comes with it.

It's been nice chatting.
good nite y'all.

Ruby_Pearl:

That's what am saying. . . . .What if you can't always be there for him?
What if you don't see him for a week, a month or so?
Is that not when he starts cheating? and how do you prevent that?
One of my distant aunt's husband is in Nigeria. Been like that since I came here. I don't understand that kind of marriage o.

Having said all this if my man ever disappears for days and weeks without him being gone on work related stuff or if I ever get wind that he's cheating,that's it
I'm gone.
AIDS is real and I refuse to be killed by a third leg.

Gucci_Babe:

so if you don't tell him to find a job. the burden is on one person's head and that could cause problem, i think some days you might have to let it out, trying to talk nice Always is not going to solve the problem

Yes he needs to get a job and fast too.
and I'll help whatever way I can
Queenisha ain't babysitting no grown man
but I won't question his manhood while he's unemployed.

I must admit that I haven't been in this situation for any length of time
For women who work and their men is sitting at home watching Montel,I have no idea how they do it.
It must not be easy

Ruby_Pearl:

10 points answer. Merci.

Plz, what are the Dos and Don'ts of spicing up your marraige.
I[b] just had a dispute with a NLer who thinks having sex on his mother's bed is the best way to go. Do you agree? [/b]

OSANOBUA!!
a marriage is spiced up by the parties not taking each other for granted.
I still dress up good.
I'm usually the best looking wife at the parties
not because I'm the prettiest but because I take good care to look my best
WE still cuddle and smooch at corners, at the movies if it's almost an empty theatre, in his office
we are still as spontaneous as we were before the kids came
He would still come home for lunch and a "session" on my days off.
We would still do it in his home office,living room,bathroom and shower.
Try new things
That's the way to keep it spiced up and makes us look forward to it

Gucci_Babe:

i would like to ask the same question, because a lot of men says " I love you i want to marry you" some of them you love back and some are pest you can't stand!

Ruby_Pearl:

Yay! I did not even see KarmaMod [/b]online.

I've wanted to ask you, how did you feel when you met your husband?

onyinye2:

Like always.

@osisi
[b]How did you know that you were ready to be married? I mean is there a feeling that one gets or do you just feel it in your heart? How do you know that this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with? Who I can share all with, and see him as someone i can bare all burdens with?

I don't know for other people but for me the day I set my eyes on my husband I knew he was the one.
That's why I believe in love at first sight
I had the qualities I needed in a man and he fit them all.
and moreover I prayed to marry the right spouse
Mine was also easier because I didn't date a whole lot and had never had my heart broken by anyone so I have no man horror stories.
That's why I believe girls should marry young when there are men coming in droves asking for yourhand.
If you wait till the clock begins to tick,desperation may set in and you settle for anyone that comes along just to answer mrs.