₦airaland Forum

onyinye2:
Osisi, how did you get to the part where you give more and take less? Cause knowing me, that is something i truly don't grasp.

My sister for an opinionated person like myself, I still see my strong self rising up every once in a while but I hate the aftermath so I have learnt over the years that some things are just not worth it.
I know deep down in me that my husband loves me and is not out to make me miserable.
When we disagree in issue,I let him know my opinion but I don't push it if it differs wih his.
Men love to be respected even when they are talking rubbish
[b]make your point,calmy and with explanations and leave it there[/b]and I can assure you, he'll pick the better option when he lays down to think it through.
That is my secret weapon.

tRoOE:
[size=13pt]same here, i guess that's y am getting cold feet[/size]

[size=13pt]yea i guess, but there should be a limit in compromising

Yes oh men are babies, wonder how long is going to take them to grow up

[/size]

Omo eko, no one is perfect.
we are just mere humans with our strong and weak attributes.
Not talking about you (don't know the situation) but that's why cohabiting is very bad.
why would a woman move into a house with a man cook ,clean and sleep with him without marriage?
That's why people get their hearts broken all the time because they play wife before they're called one.

tRoOE:
[size=13pt]hmmmmmmm i see
[color=Black]So would you move back to Naija if husband want youHaba you didn't answer my other question , i go fight you oh[/color][/size]
[size=13pt]Don't blame me jare, am just trying to learn from other people experiences.

[/size]

no family details
I would want us to discuss that and if he insists,I will have no choice but to move back.
That's not a tough decision but he'll have to promise to get me the basic comforts I need like constant light and water.

@ Professor Queenisha,

I w'anna get married soon.
Can u tell me the advantages of being a married man??        
What do i stand to gain because me thinks marriage is an entrapment for a guy like moi.

hannibal,you too ROFL
Marriage is not an entrapment at all if you are in love with your wife.
There are many women out there but there are few few that'll be good for you.
I know you specialize in the beauty department but there's more to a good woman than physical beauty.
I'm not saying you should go and marry Missy Elliot .
But if you pick up a pretty girl that wants you to buy her a gucci purse on the first date or orders the most expensive thing on the menu.
That may not be your wife

Queenisha: Tell us about married life. What you do to make it work.

a lot of hard work and seflessness realising that I'm in this thing till death do us part.
no plan B

lol, too late to start thinking that way.

Men are like babies, I guess, you have to be a little more lenient on them.
Trust me, I'D compromise more often if thats going to make my husband happy.

Right Nwando?

Somehow, I want to read KarmaMod's reply on this topic. Where is she?

True that. My mom had moi around 20-22, which I think was a bit too early.
What happens if my husband wants me to have babies right off, how do I deny? I mean, how can I persuade him to wait later on?

Communication,communication and all that before marriage.
get to know the man.
One person must have to compromise.

Ruby_Pearl:
Like he stops a helping around the house, he starts smoking to ease stress, things like that.
I mean, imagine marrying a man that you can talk to, call at anytime time (where he can be reached), but then he stops picking up calls, doesn't help, and starts being distant

take him to Mountain of fire let them cast out demons from him
kidding.
If he starts being distant or picks up bad habits,he could be depressed.
and most men get to feel worthless when they're not performing optimally financially and it's worse when the wife nags.

tRoOE:
[size=13pt]osis at what age did you get marry
How many pikin you get
But on a serious note
Why does women[b] Compromise[/b] more than men _{it been bugging me lately}
[/size]

women compromise more than men I guess because men are very different from women.
They have a different need in a relationship than we do

onyinye2:
You Abia staters. . . . geez louise. Ebe ka unu niile esi na Enugu State?

Osisi. . . . awotahum kedu isi mee ya I mean submission sounds like something that aint going to fit me well :-\

I'm sure you already know I'm not a door mat.
Submission does not mean being brain dead.
My mom says that it takes awhole lot of common sense to stay married.
A marriage will never ever work until the woman realizes that ther's no power tussle going on.
I had to learn that.
The fundamental thing is the kind of man one is married to.
Open your eyes during coursthip and be ready to call it quits at anytime if the man shows any signs of being unreasonable and abusive.
Respect is the key and being  Christian,I sought for a man na atu egwu Chineke (That fears the Lord)
And I have absolutey no problems in submitting to his authority.
A man who loves and respects your opinions is very easy to submit to

Ruby_Pearl:
Is it recommended to have kids right after marriage?

I guess it depends on the individuals.
There's an advantage in having your kids early before the age of 30.
The later you you have them,the higher chances of having children with congenital defects.
And moreover we're not in control sometimes of when they come so why not start trying right away.

What say you, when your husband changes? What do you do when you cannot trust him anymore?

what kind of changes,are you talking about?
we all change.
be a little specific dear.

yes o.
I grabbed an Abia man
abi Abia man grabbed me

This is your time all these young maidens.
ask me questions
and I'll be happy to share.
I'll also tell you of mistates I made that you shouldn't

onyinye2:
Nwoke bu onye Igbo abi?

e he now!
tiger si na abia state

Gucci_Babe:
for us yet to marry, tell us more from the difference between being single and getting married, how has it changed you personally? good or bad? any lessons? if you can have it another way, would you want to get married or you regret it?

adjustments after marriage

1. I had to learn how to cook unlike when I was single, I could eat bread and coke for dinner

2. I had to learn what it means to make a man happy.Besides good Ukazi soup, a man wants to feel respected and to know that he's in charge of his home.

3. I had to learn not to make decisions about us on my own like inviting my friends over for a chitty chat session. Had my share of mistakes in the beginning till I realised that it's not "I" but "we".

4. I had to learn that whereas women need security and emotional fulfillment from the husband, the husband needs respect,sex,sex and more sex .

5. I had to learn that the fastest way to get a man on "lockdown" is loving his mother with all your heart and never speaking ill of her.She'll always be the greatest woman on earth to him and he expects his wife to hold her to that esteem.

6. I had to learn to be patient in all things especially with his obsession of CNN, The sports channel.
_{Thank God I found nairaland just before my patience ran out}.

Gucci_Babe:
for us yet to marry, tell us more from the difference between being single and getting married, how has it changed you personally? good or bad? any lessons? if you can have it another way, would you want to get married or you regret it?

For me, I married my soul mate
a man who loves the Lord, loves me and would give his life for me
I married at the prime of my life  so I don't really know what it means to be single and live on my own.
I married a man who lets me be me and  the big change is me realising that my decisions affect him and our family
I've always been a homebody so marriage suits me well.
What I like best about being married[b] to the one I'm married to ([/b]who by the way, is a very intelligent man) is knowing that when I pick up the phone and call wherever he is, he'll drop everything and give me the attention required.
That's why I get mad when I see all the generalizations on Nairaland about Nigerian men.
There are still many good men out there and I have one of them nightly on my bed

how we do it in Enugu state


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86-6PjpJMDg&feature=related

Atilogwu in Chicago


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TqsxHm_F_QI&feature=related

blackspade:
Bleep those Italians, they're going to get another thing coming if they think messing with us Africans is something easy.

The news item says it was over drug dealing.
We don't miss them

She'll be Mrs Uche Uche
that one dey one kain

Ibime:
Thank God I was never broke enough to fly Nigeria Airways . I still remember the poor service and broken toilets on Kabo airlines domestic flights.

broke indeed
Nigerian airways was just as good as British airways in their heydays

When the cat started licking valerian off from Svetlana, something happened to the animal. Timka probably took too much of the medication: he started licking the liquid away but all of a sudden he seized the genitals of the poor woman with his claws and teeth.

Svetlana screamed and tried to push the fierce pet lover away from her, but the cat wouldn't let go. Vera hurried to help her friend: she emptied a bucket of water on the cat and threw the animal out of the house. When she saw that Svetlana was bleeding, she called an ambulance.

ROFL
Chei
This is unbelievable.
Shouldn't they have taken her to a vet?

Wow
brings back memories.
Those air hostesses in green white green with Igbotic and conc Yoruba accents
serving meatpies and sausage rolls

with all that Ikebe on RMD

oziomatv:
gwu kwa ndi ana akoro.

Ada bekee, elewe ukwu egbuo ewu, I carelessly saw your picks last time. Ijuru eju na nwanyi.

lele nu meeeee
Ozi nwa mama
olee ebe i no we hu m in all my glory?
o wu group picture ahu?

rampagain:
chineke nna osisi ,ndi i'ro emego kwa ya ozo?

unu si anyi ga'eji okija juju chupu ndia na forum aaaaa?

Onye ndi iro gbara gburugburu
so Chukwu n'aluru ya ogu
nne ha si n'am bu trouble maker
Imagine!

bia Ibime
do you ever read things in context?
di you follow the conversation at all?
Do we need an oracle to tell us who and what MEND is and has become?
O chi m

Aloy.Emeka:
Kidnapping reserves it's original meaning no matter how you try to classify it or are you Bill Clinton that classifies sex? What do you mean by this kind of kidnapping? Kidnapping is a heinous crime whether it's for rituals or for ransom. I don't care what you think but this crime was committed by Yorubas in that area. If you are a Nigerian resident, you should know that Owo is so local that any crime of that sort should have a local gang behind i[/b]t. Just tell me why an igbo kidnapper should travel from onitsha where he can kidnap only one person and make N5m to Owo where he's not sure of the victims family paying up. I don't think you will be here seriously asking for *classification of kidnapping if your relation or you were a victim of that crime. I think you can afford a little compassion and no human life is worth your Wazobia politics. Since you haven't heard of such an incident in yorubaland before, read an excerpt from the papers. Coincidentally I have a friend whose relation was a victim last year.

[b]From the article above I quote:
Two teenage igbo girls were among the 16 igbos kidnapped last year. One 14 year old girl whom they made her father to vomit N500k for her release and another 10 year old girl whose biological parents were Yorubas but was later adopted by an igbo couple living there and they paid close to N400K for her freedom yet, nothing was done about it. How foolish can people be sometimes, in the heat of their ethnic bigotry and hatred, they unknowingly kidnapped one of their own just because she has igbo parents. From 16 people to 21 and who knows it may rise to 40 next year because the victims are paying them good money. The trauma they are causing the minors among their hostages is another story for another day.

I decided not to respond anymore since I've been educated about the different types of kidnapping and the type Yorubas do and don't do.
It won't be long when the hooligans will run out of Igbo merchants to kidnap and turn on fellow indigenes,
We all remember when the MEND militants were only Kidnapping white men and expatriates.
We went on our normal businesses thanking God that we were not expatriates ,then what happened?
They ran out of white men and are now kidnapping regular folks such that it has now spread to other states.

let's watch and see.