₦airaland Forum

i tink it high tym i make fp this month.

Thoughtful gestures—as long as your heart's in the right place—will win you points, right?

Sorry, wrong. In fact, many of the nice things you do for your girlfriend may actually be driving her crazy: Buying her jewelry that's not her style, surprising her with romance at inopportune times, trying to fix her problems (rather than just listening to them), for example. What sweet, point-winning moves are you making that she secretly hates?

It's not quite as tricky as it sounds, says psychologist Alicia Clark, PsyD. "The problem mainly happens when a gesture isn't fully considered in terms of how a partner will feel," Clark says. "Thinking of how she'll feel about something is always a safe move to make sure your thoughtful gestures are received in the way you intended."

Okay, consider her feelings and you'll probably do fine—but here are some moves to avoid anyway.

1. Buying her jewelry
I love jewelry—most women do. So why am I almost always disappointed when a guy presents me with something sparkly? "Guys make the mistake of thinking that the broad category of 'jewelry' is enough," says relationship expert Tracy Thomas, Ph.D. "It's not." Women are very particular about jewelry, she says, and if you're not paying attention to what she actually likes and wears, your thoughtful gift comes across as a lack of interest.

"It looks like you don't know or care about what she really loves," Thomas says. "If you're going to buy her jewelry, you'd better know what she likes to wear. You can look for clues—does she like hearts, does she like gold or silver, is she drawn to bigger or smaller pieces?"

2. Trying to fix her problems
Unless her problem is a leaky faucet, a hard-to-hang painting, or a spider, she probably doesn't want you to fix it. "Men and women are very different in this regard," says psychotherapist Vinita Mehta, Ph.D. "When a woman is feeling down, she typically wants to be heard and have her feelings validated."

Translation: If she's having issues with her best friend or a colleague at work, she wants to vent, not come up with a solution. All you have to do is listen to her and (occasionally) agree.

3. Lavishing her with gifts
A pretty necklace here, some roses there—that's fine. But a constant onslaught of clothes, jewelry, perfume, and other "thinking of you" trinkets? Not smart.

She dislikes your avalanche of gifts for a couple of reasons. According to Clark, too much masculine care-taking behavior (i.e. buying her things) feels controlling, especially if she's gainfully employed and financially capable of taking care of herself. Also, even if your intentions are pure, she feels pressure to reciprocate—and no woman wants to be in a relationship where she constantly feels one step behind.

4. Jumping in the shower without an invitation
I'm all for sexy shower time—but when I'm 20 minutes late and trying to simultaneously shave my legs and deep-condition my hair, you'd better have a damn good reason for hopping in and stealing half the hot water. "Physical space is an important component in relationships," Clark says. "Entering another's space uninvited—even if you're trying to be affectionate—can fall flat."

I'm not saying you can't be spontaneous and romantic, just try not to do it when we're pressed for time or in the middle of getting ready: No girl wants to be dragged away for a quickie when she's halfway done with her makeup.

5. Checking in on her
You know the drill: Drop her off, but wait until she's inside before driving off. That's fine—no woman is going to fault you for seeing her safely home. But when you start asking her where she is, or when she's coming back, even if it's just because you care about her and are excited to see her, she'll start getting irritated.

"This is almost always meant to convey interest, caring, and affection," says Clark. "But it can read to her as controlling and jealous. Too much attention can feel invasive." Bottom line: Unless she asks you to, or you need her immediate expertise on how to put out a kitchen fire (or something), try not to check in on her.

we pass through libya ,mali ,burkina faso .ivory coast which is closer to ogun state .its not easy very risky.i love to take risk.somtimes ships can tumble if u knows how to swimm you can make it alive to the italy coast of lampedusa.when you are rescued.it was in 2006 tht i made the adventure but now i have a passport .its only the strong that can survive the cold in the sea

not 1month o like 2or 3 days if weather permits

the last time i was in europe it was by sea .it was italy .i was going for a soccer trial .we arrive at a place called lampedusa. so many illegal imigrant ,was in the ship.i was in italy for 6months before i left via ship again.hv u ever been to europe by sea share it with us

noted

10/10 am reading davinci code ryt now very interesting

only for naija all ds tin dey happen ,nothing like tht inmy hood belgium

everybody views on this university of marriage r different o ,some people want it legalise while others want it village style .any how your hubby fit do am make take am so you get pikin to call ya own an ya parents,go see there children children.and if u know say u no fit marry go adopt one legally and train him or her ya sef .no waite for anybody to put u for prison and call it marriage.marriage is not a do or die tin.una goodmorin o hv a blessed week ahead #raphycares

this land is not for sale.

this kind post na him dey make ppl wey them don e-yab,e-slap,e-punch ,e-kick.wey com develop heart attack then die. dem go smile for there grave from now on.op u b correct dude

good to see myself in that list.i even help my gf to choose her dress n i wear panty for her as well as a cool dude

all these ppl wey they turn this thread into sermon ,na them dey chop ileya meat pass if u dont know.they jus dey pretend say na them holy pass .me i be xtian i get muslim frewns o xmas they eat my chiken n turkey ,salah i eat d ram.that wht makes our frewnship thick.ram dey sweet o,these who hv not tasted it yet must hv eaten monkey.

get ur tongue around sometin

so no body knows d meaning of these words i put up so no body knows d meaning of these words i put up

carefreewannabe:
I expected it.

u make correct sense jare

all this makes alot of sense.guys una don hear abi,i thank God that i hv never patroniz brothel and will never ever.am an orphan so i go easy with life

na me u dey preach this sermon for guy


For ya mind now you tell me off kwo. Shior. Carry ya molue commot jare make my hummer pass. Because I try to humour your dry joke? Shior, ram come with suit and tie and trouser? No o, e for come with pampers, sanitary pads and condoms and tooth paste and tooth brush to wash that ya mouth wey you dey use enter people.
Shior. Because I try pretend say your joke funny abi?
World people sha, The moment you open your nice side, dem go just insult and abuse the niceness.
That joke wey be like wetin a 5yr old go make. Old papa like you make am, we pretend say e funny you come want do shakara ontop.
Shior! Next, time buy ram wey get biabia and wey come with shaving stick and mirror.
While people dey buy better thing you dey buy ogbanje ram.
Shior.
Abegi go sidon for corner jare make people wey dey work and wey fit afford REAL Ram talk jare.

No time for time jare. Swoooshhhhhhh! I fly you pass. I don decide say I no go do E-yabbing again. I don go, better thin

this blood money thin is real ,only a right thinking guy won't sale his soul to the devil.

this blood money tin is real only right thinking guys won sale there soul to the devil.some men remove there dick spiritualy and wont be able to father a child till they die but they will hv money ..and some women can sale there womb for money.some can even kill there first child.what about these mama put on the road.some of them wash there puzzy and use the water to cook it will pull costomer to them.

search for these words.. cunnilingus,joe sixpack,fuckable

delishpot: Dem fit chop the suit trouser and bow tie join? If not ehn, na waste of money o. Lol.

fo ya mind abi no quote me Again o go sleep

d ram tht i buy was imported from germany ,it came with suit with trouser n bow tie .i tell una how much we buy am unano go believe.so no need

d main reason i eat my meat after my meal is bcuz it will help me to digest some food that r hidin somewere in my throat and push it down to my stomach so i will be full.

i hope you all have hard the news, what really happen to them what's it the weather or just untimely death?

judedwriter: Me 2! I hated maths with red passion It made me really sick. This na entertainment age, when youth like davido and wizzy are making mega bucks just by singing instead of working like zombies in an office the value of education has dropped considerably. Every one wants to make money sharp-sharp.

na so o things aint as they seems

LaRoyalHighness: Edikan..

akwa ibom babe aba dea

[quote author=Enoquin]The Parents/Guardians
Because we live in a certificate environments, parents and guardians deploy almost any means to see their children come tops.
Who pays for the special/miracle centres? Who pays for a name slot on the admission list? when parents start that do or quench attitude, there will be no improvement on the child's foundation.
During my PGD, there were students who couldn't spell simple words, those who didn't bother reading because they knew how they would get themselves sorted in the end; those that took in materials during exams...all these point to the foundation.

Also, parents have to show interest in their child's school work. I also agree that schools could do more using Learning Aids but some of these 'private' mushroom schools who have business (wo)men as proprietors/owners have to make their ventures 'successful' by whatever means even if it means all the children passing their exams all the times till the graduate.
This of course is to keep the parents ha

thats not all the reasons that make someone hate school.mathematics can make a child sick some times ,you know i mean too much equation in ya head will make you forget to eat lunch.when your parents want to pic you home they will be surprise that you hv not even finished ya snack...abi i dey lie ,i always hate maths during my teens .

yes indeed they r lucky and God is busy preparing d woman that i will marry

simplyOJ: Your children & wife are indeed lucky then.

this op try well well but come o this commandments pass 20 o.why do some girls like guys to buy them recharge card everytime without knowing that we will need something inreturn.life is all about rob my back i rob ya back.