₦airaland Forum

1st phase: two kids cross(60kg)
2nd phase:one kid brings back the boat and aligths.(30kg)
3rd phase: mum uses boat to cross and aligths(60kg)
4th phase: kid at the other side boards the bot and bring it back(30kg)
5th phase: the other kid joins and the two kids cross(60kg)
6th phase: one kid is dropped.(30kg)
7th phase: other kid takes boat back to dad and aligths(30kg)
8th phase: dad takes boat, crosses and aligths(60kg)
9th phase: kid on the other side boards bot and meets his sibling(30kg)
10th phase: two kids board boat and cross to meet their parenta.(60kg)
QED

Three guys were on a safari in Africa and they
stumbled upon a tribe. The chief took them
captive and told them they have two choices,
poomba or death. The first man replied poomba
and the entire tribe bleeped him up the ass and
sent him on his way. The second man thought for
a minute and then replied poomba. The entire
tribe then bleeped him up the ass and sent him on
his way. The third man said Bleep that, Im not
queer Ill choose death. The chief then replied
you chose death. . . . . .by poomba!

Let's face it -- English is a crazy
language. There is no egg in eggplant
nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor
pine in pineapple. English muffins
weren't invented in England or French
fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies
while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet,
are meat.

We take English for granted. But if we
explore it's paradoxes, we find that
quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings
are square and a guinea pig is neither
from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but
fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce
and hammers don't ham? If the plural of
tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of
booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one
moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make
amends but not one amend, that you comb
through annals of history but not a
single annal? If you have a bunch of
odds and ends and get rid of all but one
of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers
praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
what does a humanitarian eat? If you
wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your
tongue?

Sometimes I think all the English
speakers should be committed to an
asylum for the verbally insane. In what
language do people recite at a play and
play at a recital? Ship by truck and
send cargo by ship? Have noses that run
and feet that smell? Park on driveways
and drive on parkways?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance
be the same, while a wise man and a wise
guy are opposites? How can overlook and
oversee be opposites, while quite a lot
and quite a few are alike? How can the
weather be hot as hell one day and cold
as hell another?

Have you noticed that we talk about
certain things only when they are absent?
Have you ever seen a horseful carriage or
a strapful gown? Met a sung hero or
experienced requited love? Have you ever
run into someone who was combobulated,
gruntled, ruly or peccable? And where
are all those people who ARE spring
chickens or who would ACTUALLY hurt a
fly?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
of a language in which your house can
burn up as it burns down, in which you
fill in a form by filling it out and in
which an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not
computers, and it reflects the
creativity of the human race (which, of
course, isn't a race at all). That is
why, when the stars are out, they are
visible, but when the lights are out,
they are invisible. And why, when I wind
up my watch, I start it, but when I wind
up this essay, I end it.

and just imagine what i heard today from two friends quarelling. "I may be fat but you're ugly,
and I can lose weight.
"

4 Nuns at a church wanted to watch TV. The first
one said she wanted to watch the formular one race. The
second one wanted to watch the sexy Shawn Michels
on WWF. The third nun said she wanted to watch
the knitting channel so she can knit some mittens
for the kitchen. The fourth nun said she wanted
to watch the discovery channel on how a baby is
born.

After some dicussion, they all decided to flip
channels every 2 seconds so they can watch the
same things.

This is what is sounded like:
And they're off! They're on top of each other!
In, Out, In, Out, and yes, the baby is
born!

nwanta ebriba, akam fughi ya na youtube. M fu ya, ma anighi ya ani.
i am from ozuitem. greetings.

olaniyi olanike

Some of them almost beg u for the remaining naira in nr wallet. i mean the customs/NDLEA guys after your passport has been stamped by the immigration. the go ahed doing their regular searching and when they are wanding you, especially the women, they ask u weather u are going to need that money abroad.
One of them women even told me it was her birthday that nigth. i couldnt hold my laugther. see scopes, my trousers almost fell of in the process because i  i was wearing a baggy jean and i had removed my belt for the scan. On another occasion, the lady was like, she could have asked me to take her to dinner later that nigth but since i was travelling, i could give her the money i would have spent on her. They are quite funny, i cant help giving what i have.

answer is -52454.25. use BODMAS.

anyways my question has not been answered.
you may use this hint

0001=1
0010=2
0011=3
1001=9
1010=A
1111=F

By the time i am 45, i shld be starting sumtin like that in nigeria _{but not that big sha} maybe a small ashphalt airfield with cessna and a six seater mooney.
Watch out guys, i am cumming up.

convert this number from base 2 to hexadecimal.

1100101100011010011011001001₂

Have you considered that we men only get one orgasm at a time compared to women who can have multiples? We are such poor creatures.

this is uche ogbuagu's joke. the aba based radio cassete comedian.

ok

I coudnt believe my eyes today. These journalists and their news sef. just take a look at this page

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20071116/wl_uk_afp/britainliaroffbeat

They start their lies by saying "No, honestly " and Lawers and politicians are banned from the competetion cos they are "too skilled " to to compete. lol

hıs number of posts now ıs 1717 lol

Drop that ass on the couch
flıp ıt all da way down to da floor
clımb to da top shake ıt upsıde down
slıde off the mother f**kıng floor,
work dat crown gıve a lap dance
shake ıt lıke ıts for ladıes groups
take all the ballers to da VIP
gırl go'on work your badunkadunk


badankadunk---twısta _{ı just love thıs guy}

i thınk ı am too emotıonal thats why ı am so scared of relatıonshıps

@krazıed
just run borland and open 'new' from fıle menu. u are ready to go

@smart k, workıng on ıt.

kasala don burst

Smart K.:
yea man. i need a c program to convert any number to words in c. thanx in advance. I have developed a similar stuff using VB and c# but its not perfect.

10x in advance.

Pls shed more lıgth on ur questıon. Do you want a program that dısplays the correspondıng letter of the alphabet as a result or what?

krazied:
how do you use the c compiler that is how do you install and load it need help seriously cause am learning this for school

Whıch compıler do you use? I use borland. and ınstallatıon ıs not supposed to be a problem. Whats the name of ur compıler?

ıf u dont get the punchlıne of a joke, dont conclude ıts stupıd

modıfıed

only in asia will you see such crazy s**t

@poster
you failed to tell them that the scholarship for nigerians are limited to only 5 people. In my freshman year, i was the sixth and they did not even consider me.

-Finding suitable accommodation for international students in or around the EMU campus.

About this one, what do you have to say about the stranded nigerian students that had to do a peaceful demonstration before a temporary accomodation was provided for them?

Please see these links
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PM9cdhxe4hQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3QXJqf0L_NU and
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EJVFp1duz0  .  I don't want my fellow nigerians to come here and be stranded like many people have.

i have a retarded cousin that does the 58, i have done the 64 in BWI with 200 naira lol , i cant stand 47, and i am definitely going to do the 84

whats up with u all assholes

ecko snickers, black g-unit jeans and short sleeve high collar shirt.

@ poster, many naija peeps don't undertsand this american joke. personally, i don't like knock knock jokes. they are for the early teenage years. 

so how do we get it? shed more ligth pls