₦airaland Forum

Korrection: Point out where it is in the Bible to thank God for what makes you happy....just quote a verse...mtchewwwwwwwwwwwwww

Happiness is expensive in Nigerian churches, mate.

They operate the business at high fixed cost since the likes of Ole-depo has to use private jets. They will charge for any marginal utility you consume, nothing is free.

Detongue: Football is a passion and it's like opium. Thanksgiving in churches is just nomal 4 those who are addicted and there is nothin wrong. D Bible says we should rejoice with those who are rejoicing so rejoice and give thanks

You are a fcking mooron!

Even if Thanksgiving is normal in churches, is it not for some achievement or betterment in one's life? What has the congregation achieved? How has their life improved?

Bloody foool! One of the mooorons that would scrape any stewpid excuse to continue being mooorons of religion.

jim jones: that picture is not one of a pentecostal church. na catholic church be that na. albeit, nothing makes any one church less bullshit than another though.

So Catholic churches don join the rank of criminal churches so they can compete and survive? Maybe Ole-depo of Winners will get investment bankers to acquire the Catholic arm of Nigeria through a huge M&A deal so they can screw their customers (i.e. congregation) more at lower synegical cost and eliminate competition in the market.

Donmeca: We have seen various extortions by pastors and priests in various churches but d use of foreign football clubs to grind out more money from happy or expectant fans is so novel and creative one. Today my church was almost blue in colour and when d thanksgiving was announced, Chelsea fans that took over d whole place. They happily and freely gave thanks to God for helping a team based in far away London to win d UCL. The Men of God were grinning from molar to premolar as d donations came. I'm not even talking about reckless celebration that is still going on...leading to loss of lives

Do u have a similar experience in ur own church?

The fucktardism of the average religious Nigerian is really overwhelming.

JEEEEEEESUS!

And mooorons will continue going to these pentecostal churches?

blacklion: Yes, you've made some good points. Those are good options up there. But I doubt any one in Nigeria who paid hard earned money for a Dolphin property seriously imagines he can recover the investment via rent. The real benefit of buying over-priced Dolphin property is access to business finance via using the title deeds as security for bank loans. Also, banks are more willing to lend against a property in Dolphin than one in Mowe.

I have some lands in Lekki, Mowe, Ikorodu and Badagry. Some are in LASG-owned/planned new estates, others are in private estates being created/managed by corporate developers and some in areas where you purchase from the indigenous family landowners and each owner develops. From what I've seen so far, thanks to the rampant lawlessness in Nigeria, both the LASG town planning rules and/or the private estate development regulations are mostly not strictly enforced whether by private or corporate developers or the government. Even the few decent private estates in Lekki, after a while, the usual Nigerian factor creeps in - lack of infrastructure maintenance, the estate developer starts cutting corners, the property owners starting making unauthorized changes to the structures, adding new extensions, modifying the usage of the property etc. So don't get your hopes too high about living in an area comparable to a suburban division in North America. Frankly, I think the best one can hope for in Lagos is something akin to Lekki Phase 1. Unless you can afford Banana Island

IMHO Amuwo Odofin is not reasonable anymore. Its now from N10m even for waterlogged land. You can buy 3 plots in Lekki or 10 plots in Mowe or Ofada with that money!

Also, you don't have to go as far as Epe to find reasonable land in that axis. You can still get land in Ibeju-Lekki from N700k to N2m depending on location and proximity to the road etc. But its mostly waterlogged land so you're looking at another N3m for raft foundation.

It is just still not an attractive proposition.

N10m (£40k, $66K) merely for land in Amuwo Odofin?

N5m (£20K, $33K) for a waterlogged land and its raft foundation (which would be done for the prospector by Nigerian workers that can give you shoddy work)?

Hell No!

That is just not an attractive proposition when the opportunity cost is factored in.

For those figures one can easily get a wonderful £100K flat in Greece, Croatia, Turkey, Cyprus, Spain, Italy etc on mortgage and rent it out to locals or holiday makers to pay off the mortgage. Nicer assets, better guarantees, sane environs!

When I see some UK-based Nigerian guys feeling all funky because they state they have bought some asset in Nigeria, I almost feel sorry for them. They normally overpay for a poor asset just to feel like if they have achieved. Most of them have zero clue about investment, not even the ones that have accounting certifications. They just follow the crowd.

[Goes on his knees to talk to HIM] Thank you Baba God for giving me the brain that allows me to think independently and divergently so that I never become an individual that follows the crowd. You did a good job on this one o incase no one has told you. You be Shampion!

blacklion: For foreign based people who plan to remain abroad full time and permanently for life, no.

There is another way you know.

- By a better and cheaper property abroad for maybe N60m, and it will still most likely appreciate.

- When you move to Nigeria, rent it out and get good income on it. Maybe over N3m a year.

- Rent in Nigeria for N1.5m a year from someone willing to pay, or stuck with having to pay, N70m for a poor asset.

- Use the arbitrage in rental income and any extra income you make in Nigeria to get a land somewhere that is reasonable in Nigeria (e.g. Epe, Ikorodu, Amuwo Odofin) and build a classy house you want cheap.

- Move out of the poor, overpriced N70M asset maximum 10 years later just when it starts to crumble and become a slum.

- You have a quality house abroad and at home, and both are a house to your taste that you have not overpaid for because you exhibited lateral thinking.

This is the same Dolphin Estate that 15 years ago was hot like Lekki?

https://www.nairaland.com/30515/current-price-dolphin-estate-flats#753189

This is the kind of asset foreign based people should waste their money on?

johnnyemman: Uyo, Akwa Ibom

Since it is N3m for one plot, is it in the core city area exactly (as in, it is maximum 10 mins drive from the official Governor's residence or the royalty's house)?

johnnyemman: Having genuine money is not easy? it takes 10-15 years to be stable abroad if you work very very hard.
Let me use myself as an example. I moved to US in 2002 at the age of 25 with an Nigeria Degree with no experience. It took me 3 years to have a green card, got my Green card in 2005, i did not have a professional job, just working here and there to survive, after having my GC i quickly enroll in school, Finish my Master Program in 2008, Got a good job 2009. Started paying off my debts. 2010 i was stable enough to get me a decent place to stay, started help folks back home, 2011 travel to Nigeria for the first time, start making plans of getting married, building a house and all that good stuff.

Luckily my uncle wanted to sell a plot of land, he needs money ASAP, for medical bills, the plot is worth N3 Million ......very decent and nice location, he is willing to give it to me for N2 Million. Everybody wants me to buy the plot quick quick , everyone is so sure that i have N2 Million(USD 12,500) but the fact is dont have that money cash ready in my savings. But since its a nice deal i took N10,000 from my 401K, $2500 from savings tp pay for the plot.

For me to raise a a decent boyz quarters from start to finish it will cost me N6,000,000. i have start savong aggressively, my only source of income is my job, i make a decent income, i can save that amount to build boys quaters but it will take 2 to 3 years to complete that project.

Am not yet married, if i fine a lady in Nigeria to married ,it will cost me close abt$20,000 for traditional and white wedding even ticket another stuff to bring her abroad, But am considering marrying some in America believe its cheap........less logistics, less drama lol

My point is just because some is staying abroad he picking money from the ground, Politician has mess the system up. Nigeria think making genuine money in America is easy.

Good interesting points.

If I may ask, where is the plot located?

ROSSIKE: You're talking absolute rubbish. All round.

Really?

Why don't you talk sense then?

[quote author=info@lpf]We'll try to answer from our perspective:

1. Inflated Prices - Right about when we returned to Nigeria, there was an unprecedented boom in the Nigerian RE market, some say hyper inflated and caused by politicians laundering money by purchasing RE, but I have little interest in speculation. Whatever the cause, a house that would normally have sold for the equivalent of $300,000 - $500,000, suddenly was being marketed for the equivalent of $1 - 2 Million! Reality is those prices are out of reach to most people. Even in the US, I do not live in a million dollar house!

2. Uncertainty - I'll explain this one by using an example. In Atlanta, Georgia, before the RE bubble burst, one could reasonably estimate the RE growth rate at 4 - 6% year over year. This is all founded upon an incredibly mature RE industry, backed by a solid property surveying and valuation systems, a state of the art title recording system, fantastic title insurance in case any questions ever arise as to ownership and a justice system that works! Why is this relevant? Well quite simply, I would invest $100, knowing that except in an economic depression, my home purchase is backed by the full faith of the Republic! IN Nigeria, one could spend N500,000,000 on RE, and then have to contend with a disgruntled son or daughter for the rest of your days. No thanks.

3. [b]Quality - The reality is, once one has lived outside of Nigeria for an extended period (even Ghana and Benin), one gets accustomed to a certain level of quality in building design and finishing. This is almost always absent in Nigerian homes! There is a mediocrity in finishing that has become so accepted, it is quite sad. Why can tiles not be laid properly? Why do screeded walls and ceilings fall unaided (and always when you have guests, right?)? Why do the circuit boards blow up or burn? Why do wooden floor boards stub your toes? Why do doors always come off their hinges? Why do kitchen cabinets fall in the middle of the night, with all my good china? Why do the pipes always leak, why do toilets shake when you sit on them, why do I have to replace my toilet flushing mechanism every 3 months? Why does the air conditioner man attach the AC to the wall in such a way that I have to bend my head to read the inscriptions on it? Why, why, why
Quite simply, how can one then justify paying so much for such crap? I am always amused by the pictures in the property section, and always laugh till my sides pop open when I go on inspections of houses with "superlative finishing". Please! Look up a million dollar house any place else in the world except perhaps Tokyo and Beijing, and compare with a million dollar house in Nigeria, especially Lagos. I don't live in Abuja or Calabar, and don't intend to, so that market is not so relevant to me.
[/b]
4. Location, Location, Location - I refuse to live in Mowe, Ajiran, Egbeda, Iyana ipaja, Ofada or any other named after food! I respect people who live there, and who have managed to make life comfortable for themselves. Hats off to you! To each his own poison, however. I choose to live in Ikoyi, Ikeja GRA or Apapa GRA and Victoria Island coming in a distant 4th. I like ground space and lush greenery, and whatever is left of it in Lagos can be found in these areas. Can I afford to buy lush greenery and ground space in these areas? Hell no! So I rent. It is affordable, and if I do a Net Present Value calculation of my money, I am well pleased.[/quote]So beautifully well said.

I am bowing to you especially in regards to the bolded.

Comprehensive and sublime, mate!

Absolutely IRRITATING workmanship. My blood just boils when I see the work of an average Nigerian, be it a professional or an artisan. "E don do, we don try now" delivery. Tchew!

excelproperties: You will agree with me that some Nigerians after there sojourn, handwork and sufferings abroad , they get back to Nigeria and yet becomes a Tenant,to be candid it may not be rosy for everyone abroad anyway but to be candid also at the same time some do have the means to buy property/properties .

Some sent money to there relatives and they spent such money without building any while fake pictures are sent to them,there are other reasons

what is your view?
Let share maturely without thread derailments.

Thanks
excelproperties

Maybe because they know what value for money is.

I think it is pretty senseless to buy some house for N70M in Lekki where the house is built with irritatingly poor worksmanship, the roads are bad, the environ is like a low-class area in the West and the place is liable to being flooded.

When you can spend N45M to buy a wonderfully outstanding home in Florida, Maryland etc in a lovely area, the house is superbly built, top-class public amenities and where you are closer to wonderful resorts.

If one tries to buy a house equivalent in quality as the one you get in Florida for 45M in Nigeria, you would be paying over N200M.

Most properties in Nigeria are junk and are purely overpriced!

But that is exactly my point. The OND has no limitation to his career line [on paper] but yet is not required to do NYSC, while a BSc/HND is restricted from starting a career in the first place except he does the NYSC.

I guess it is an advantage to the OND on one hand to be free of the padlock, but a disadvantage on the other hand because it appears the Government is stating only BSc/HND can add value to the nations voluntary service.

AjanleKoko: Your two-year old son can call you? Who is he, Ganesh Sittampalam?

His 2 year old also owns an ipad.

He would probably be driving a Ferrari by 10.

Don't you know his child is the most gifted and he loves his child more than the way any of you love yours?

The modern day parent: "Look at me! Look at me! Look at me! My life is perfect. My kids are exceptional, most intelligent and speak with funky English accents but don't speak the bush local dialect well. We are progressive and modern."

What I don't understand is how people with OND are not required to do NYSC but those with BSc and HND must do it.

Yet the former and the latters are allowed to work. So is the OND prevented from rising in work in any way?

How does the government reconcile restricting working rights of BSc/HND but yet the OND is allowed to work anytime and get to the same position as the NYSCers?

jennykadry: Which kain yeye FB? they are not allowed in FB's oo. Their mum has warned them very well. I see 14 yr olds almost everyday with their mums, coming in to talk about best contraceptive pills and you think I don't feel like throwing up but have had to keep quiet until they've gone, to vent in my toilet? . One of them calls her mum a B*tch. Arggggggggggggg and when I was like such words are not allowed here, she wanted to show me say she stubborn and her mum was right beside her. She started telling me not to tell her what to say or do cos I don't live with her B*tch of a mother so I don't know what it's like having to live with her these years that infact she will be moving out next year to live with her boyfriend and his mum Arrrg, I just could not imaginer my own kids saying such to me, damn my temper that day. I stood up looked at her with fingers pointing at her and told her to be quiet . . . "This is my territory, my space, my domain so you don't come in and say whatever you feel like because you think you have the right to actually you have no right, right now so get Yourself off that chair and get out of here this minute and one more swear words from you, I will be getting someone to do me the honor of walking you out". I remember telling the mother that I don't want to see her daughter anymore cos there are certain behaviors I will not tolerate, I have kids and none of them would ever have the guts to open their mouth and talk to me like that, how dare them? . All these kids trained in obodo oyibo and unimaginably spoilt. Imagine a woman painting her son toe nails with pink cortex?

Thinking about it self, still drives me crazy.

Awww! What a cute daughter.

[Stands up to punch the air in frustration and anger]

This is one of the possibilities when people are too daft and bring up their kids like the Westerners do.

My child says such a thing to me or my wife? That child is D-U-N Done.

jennykadry: PS, I always got P and F in yoruba, everyone in my house are professors in Yoruba language except me .These girls are too young to become yoruba experts jooo

If I was president of Nigeria, I would revoke your passport and citizenship even though you are from the East! Everyone should have A* in Yoruba and come and worship in Sagamu to be full Nigerians.

jennykadry: Trust me, there are times those girls abandon their phones sometimes in their parents room and never bother about it until they need something from me or grand parents. Not once, not twice have they forgotten their phones in my parents house after a holiday and went home. My dad on my occasions drives home to them and returns the phone. They are not phone obsessed, they are books obsessed. When they visited me, goodness gracious me, I reserve my comment. These girls wrote their common entrance for high school last year and 2 years before, trust me and it was in my former high school. They were done in less than 30 minutes, the teacher was worried and told them to go through it again and they told him they were sure of their answers, rang their mum to pick them up and a month later, they were in the merit list. I mean, they did not need an interview cos their grades were impressive.

I love those girls, gosh I love them

Good girls. They are unfortunately rare exceptions.

Majority of the 10-20 year olds I see in the UK have what I call "the arch neck with text fingers".

They frequently have their neck's bent down texting and communicating through FB. They are like addicts. They can not live without their phone for 1 hour. And obviously they want the advanced ones.

jennykadry: Since feminism came into existence . Come on nowww. I have 10 and 12 yr olds nieces who were on scholarship first term last year cos they were the best in class. One is currently holding 8A's and one P. Hey the P was in yoruba, so don't blame her .

Hey both have got mobile phones, BB's(I think) and currently talking about Iphone

No kill me o!

Abeg!

I just got an image of my pikin having a P in Yoruba and I almost had a heart attack.

KAI! I would sacrifice that pikin to the God's on a pyre! Roasted lo'mo yen ma je. (The child would be a roast).

My child is only allowed to have A* in Yoruba and should have a PhD in Ijebu by TARTEEN.

On a serious note, I work on probabilities, not exceptions. The probability of a child being like your nieces is far lower than ending up with what I am trying to avoid. Moreover, you have no clue if your nieces are doing some wrong stuff online while still excelling in school.

jennykadry: ^^Too late sir. I am not going home a tokunboh wife. Restore back my virg***** and I will go back

Ipad gon gon sef, I will buy. Won't stop my kids from being the respectful and academically talented bunch that they really are.

You will go back to your father's house and explain since when did we start raising our African daughters to not follow the instruction of a MAN! Trousers only have two legs, not four.

coogar: even those ones are not as reliable as mobile phones....leaving
an 8 yr old alone for just few hours isn't that bad on a sunday.
feigning illness on sundays when i was a child to avoid the boring sermons
in churches was the norm for me....as long as there's a security man or
a gardener.....no biggie!

I have never heard anything about their unreliability or technical inferiority to mobiles.

jennykadry: Truth is it depends on the child. My nieces both have phones and they are both 10 and 12 yrs old. Trust me when I say they only remember they have a phone when they want to call me and ask me to buy something for them because their parents have said no to them, or when they ring to speak to their cousins on the phone. Outside these times, they just abandon the phojne somewhere and never remember where they kept it cos I still get calls from them, telling me that their mum has hidden their phones meanwhile the phones are somewhere in their wardrobes where they abandoned it.


They don't own a phone because their parents abandon them in the house. They own it cos they love communicating with their cousins all over.

Will I buy my 8 yr old a phone? yes.

NOT IN MY HOUSE!

That day you will have to pack your load and leave for your father's house.

coogar: how many houses in lagos have a functional landline?
you trust nitel that much?

There are other providers like Starcomms etc now.

And more importantly an 8 year old should not be home alone.

hardbody: The Head of the Unit where i once worked narrated a story of how they left their last kid at home on a sunday and went to church (i guess the stubborn boy was about 8 then and he was just acting up). However, just at about when church was over, the boy called the parents who were at about then driving home to intimate them that their security man had been tied up by some unknown men and those men were still waiting within the precints of the gate. (He saw them from upstairs and the assailants were of the belief that the entire family had gone to church). Of course my then boss made a detour, got the police to drive as an advance party after they had instructed their son to remain securley locked inside. Needless to say, there was a minor shoot out and the robbers fled from the gate. I can imagine what would have happened if that guy was not at home or worse still, if he had no phone, or perhaps a phone that was not loaded......

THis is a point to ponder over in determining the propriety or otherwise of giving phones to kids. As for me, i WILL.

And a landline would not have been appropriate for that scenario?

Instead of being worried about armed robbers, I would be more worried about useless parents that can leave an 8 year old home alone.

AjanleKoko: Fortunately I'm in the industry, so I have the resources to do a bespoke one for myself.

I understand strategy, marketing and how to build a business model. I can make you a billionaire if you let me be your manager and roll it out to mass market.

oyb: if my kid is on an outing and one of them is drowning and one of them has a phone, they can place a call to a responsible invested adult informing them that something is happening.

there was this incident in which a kid drowned in a pool and the kids sad that the couple assigned to watch were 'holding' each other or something like that. apparently rather than watch the kids , the teachers decided to toast each other or some such.

a message from one kid to a parent may be enough to avert a disaster.

you know this is naija , where several workers are like the cleaner in ezicachi's thread. now imagine people like that in charge of children. a child calling a parent who then calls the proprietor may be enough to sort out a situation before it gets out of hand

or those kids who were kidnapped two years ago in anambra. if one had a phone, they may have been able to trace them faster and saved them a lot of trauma.

Honestly, this is really fear consumerism.

Firstly, the chances of your child being kidnapped (as terrifying as the thought might be) is relatively low. And if it did happen, an armed bodyguard would be far more effective than a mobile phone. I doubt there are alot of kidnappers nowadays that do not know phones can be traced, so they would be discarding the phone on him/her asap.

If, god forbid, your child or a child is drowning. The most realistic people to save the child are the adults close by. Your phone call would most times just be a reactive tool. With the unfortunate incident of a child drowning that you stated, the kids are still better off going to find and notifying the irresponsible hor[i]n[/i]y morrafckers to come to the rescue than be calling a parent. I have not checked, but I can bet it takes less than 5 mins for a child to drown. So before you put on your clothes, go down the stairs or elevator and drive down to rescue, the disaster would be gone. You would only be there to react.

Really, by and large, this whole "it is for safety" is just immense paranoia and/or fear consumerism.

oyb: i have been thinking of buying one of those internet tvs so we can watch educational vids on youtube using a swift modem

was thinking of buying an ipad for the same reason , tho i've already done that with a netbook

there are all sorts of reasons in this country to have phone access to your kids. when you hear of schools with teachers molesting students, kids drowning in pools on school outings and teachers trying to coverup , the kid who got lost in winners chapel, the eediot bus drivers some schools use - if parents who have a far greater stake get notified of emergencies, more may be done than the 'leave it to God' after the fact.

Oyb, apart from the one stricken, how does a mobile phone help you or your child than without a mobile phone?

If, god forbid, your kid is drowning, im go dey call daddy? Im go dey press 0 - 8 - 0 - 10 . . . . . while im dey drown? You go telepath from where you are to rescue im from the wata? Your babalawo strong like that? Im sabi juju that like the one I dey use for Sagamu? Or you think Jesus dey give una juju pass Ifa?

AjanleKoko: Well . . . my kid is 4, and he already plays with a Blackberry Playbook (internet not allowed though!) I'm getting him an Android tab for kids soon, cos there are a lot of learning apps he could use. But no internet. He also watches videos of Sesame Street, etc, off the tablet.

I might keep him away from a cellphone if I felt he would be distracted by it. More likely I'll design a kiddie cellphone especially for him, that calls nobody but the parents and maybe an emergency number.

You would have to convince alot of parents to have your mentality for the manufacturers to see it as a mass market worth designing such a phone for.

I believe the reality is that majority of the world is too stewpid to come to that thinking.

For example, if one looks at the apparel market for kids nowawadays, producers are creating clothes for kids that are becoming more salacious by the day. A lot of parents of girls nowadays complain about it being a battle to find modern clothes for their kids that does not, in some way, sexualise them. Most parents are too dimwitted to notice and keep on buying the thrash the producers make for their kids, hence those that are smart become victims of market forces and are left with few options. The producers see that the mass market is where they produce clothes that sexualise kids and continue producing such. It is plainly ridiculous.

People may call me priggish but I am not raising my daughters as nymphets like I see some do in the West.

jmoore: Give your own 5 year old smartphone with access to the internet. It is not about dark ages.

It is about controlling who he or she is communicating with. Can you control what sites he or she visits with an internet enabled phone.

It is like buying a computer for your small kid. There is nothing wrong with a kid operating a computer as far as he or she is being monitored. Let him or her operate the computer in the sitting room and not buying a personal one for him. Same should apply to phone, the parents should get a fixed line that stays in the sitting room that everyone including the kid can use.

He is planning for his kids to be raise by the world. To be raised by Rihanna, Lil Wayne, Lady Gaga, Gucci Mane, Kim Kardashian etc.

He would then open his mouth gagaga and yaba yaba yaba that "what did I do wrong" when the child grows up not like he intended.

Turbocharged: Why do Nigerian like to live in the dark age? Go to a country like South Korea primary school pupils are using smartphones like galaxy s, etc, here we are arguing if ours should 3310.
I am laughing

And your point is?

Because South Korea does it, it must be good? It must be progress?

moremi2008: Louder! The neighbors can't hear your little puppy barks!

Shut up, cretin! Or just shove another Big Mac down your throat.

moremi2008: Just what I wanted. These two puppies are now barking at me!

When last did you get laid? You sound mad bitter and jealous because I can command a harem to serve my needs with a blink of an eye. It's not my fault that you're ugly and have zero charm.

Hahaha! Keeping snapping at my heels. Like I told you earlier, dream bigger; reach further and harder. When you've accomplished something besides being a low-level pencil pusher at MBB, come talk to me and I might give you a job.

person, who told you I need a job in McDonald's? Is that sucha big dream in your world?

moremi2008: Too bad everything about your posts stinks of mediocrity. I am not impressed. Try harder. Let me know when you've graduated from the best Europe has to offer (not that people think very highly of Oxbridge these days) and have proved yourself in the marketplace. Until then, keep collecting e-trophies from your NL championships! I'll keep having a good laugh at your jokes.



How much has internet "intellectual" arguments put in your malnourished NatWest account lately? I am still waiting on your tattered CV to cross my desk.

You are a cretin!

Which Community College produced this foool?

A McDonald's counter is not called a desk. Mugu!

coogar: singapore policy where if you spit in public you are fined $1000.
not flushing a public toilet gets you fined $150. that's not
discipline - that's anarchy! if they practise that in western
europe or nigeria, tongues would wag.

fair enough!

We need some of that juice in Nigeria. Maybe not all, but fcking majority of it.

The country is full of lunatics.

I prefer Singapore's sanity to Nigeria's lunacy.