₦airaland Forum

waywardpikin:
I have noticed that it's the people that are really sucked into the euphoria of love - a utopia - that end up jumping from one relationship to another. Once they come down from the 'high' that love induces their eyes become clear and they now begin to see the faults in their partner. Faults that were always there o. Before you know it they break up. It's disgusting really. Love is not enough.

Look at the OP now, according to him he's been in a relationship for 7 years. I myself am currently in a 2-year-old relationship, the longest in my life. Now I love this girl, but it isn't love that has kept me in a relationship this long with her.

I have been in love with other babes na so kini big deal?

What has kept us together is us having a sense of responsibility toward each other, friendship, mutual respect, compatibility, understanding of each other's temperament, and so many other critical factors. We intend to make it official sometime next year by the grace of God, but her name on my phone is stored her real name. No sugar, no honey, no loveydovey. She used to complain initially but since fell in line when I didn't change it. No be the name she go chop, na the love and respect wey she dey see important pass.

What I'm trying to say is that people get carried away by superficial things that's why the divorce rate is unbelievably high.

Now as much as i love my babe, I still chop the occasional kpomo on the side. Does that mean I don't love her? Telemundo is obviously at work here. Lol

bro i think i need to delve into that telemundo world and see how it operates...but the society is already dumbing me down enough...i wont add spanish/latin american mary kay fantasies dilute my course

even women that are high in libido will now be turning down for kini...tori olorun

me sha i just dey observe all of them in 3D

waywardpikin:
Dude let's not talk about something as fleeting, erratic and as unreliable as love. Instead talk about more dependable factors such as level of understanding, compatibility, friendship, etc.

I hate that word oloun.

delusional peeps

my boo is so real, she asked me what i would love about her, after love has faded 3 years ago

i think thats where the real foundation is when we get past the superficial, the 4 letter emotion that is subject to change

freecocoa:
Okay then, I hope you don't mind further questions.

If you promised to be faithful and won't even make an effort to try to keep that promise, doesn't that make you feel guilt?

Why would you feel pain? I like that you think betrayal is too strong an emotion to feel in such instance, makes me think you have some fairness in you.

Liberated? So you think marriage is/ should come with some confinement?

Actually people now define how the want their marriage to be as opposed to what our ancestors made it out to be, so I can't say what the making/breaking of a relationship is/should be as I believe people have a right to how they choose to live, provided their partners are in the know, I believe we should treat people the way we want to be treated.

Ofcourse I've heard of swingers, what I think of them? I think they are a bunch of people who have chosen a path and should live with whatever comes with it.

i didnt promise to be faithful when i asked for marriage, i promised no outside pregnancy and no second/third/fourth wife

when we started dating i promised faithfulness, i was young and naive then

ask any honest man, most will say, yes! marriage confines...although some are indifferent to the confines because of financial independence

i would feel pained (not pain), pained because she doesnt strike me as the type to do such a thing and i normally do not chase after promiscuous women unless i had envisioned a sharp sharp transaction not a life time affair like marriage

Actually people now define how the want their marriage to be as opposed to what our ancestors made it out to be, so I can't say what the making/breaking of a relationship is/should be as I believe people have a right to how they choose to live, provided their partners are in the know, I believe we should treat people the way we want to be treated.


you have a lot of depth. the woman knows my P and has accepted, sad how ppl falling over themselves to criticize and reprimand, mean while they are the ones that are in dire need of relationship counseling

we must each walk the path that we have chosen.

freecocoa:
I agree, although I must say ask, did you promise to be faithful at any point?

Would you feel betrayed if your intended ever cheats on you?

ur question is technical. i like intelligent people

ofcourse i promised to be faithful

i would feel pained maybe but certainly not betrayed. betrayal is such a strong emotion.

i may also choose to feel liberated unless the kids are involved and too young to deal...



but biko you that act like sexual infidelity is the all in all of making or breaking relationships and fiduciary duties...

ever heard of the term "swingers"

how would u classify them?

Some great Nairalanders are gracing my thread...

I see LM Ayedun is here

Welcome.

zeb04:
one dude nearby is busy fucking his wife.I can tell she is a side chick yo someone else.

Nice try

freecocoa:
I wonder why people are asking him to free the lady, didn't you all read where he said she knows his weakness? She knows yet decided to marry him, that's her beeswax.

It's the delusion part...

People know the truth but always hope it will be different with them

They aspire to save others yet are lost themselves

And then these women being nosy is not new at all

So Muslims that have more than one wife, don't love all their wives?

The way some people reason eh.....


Africans were living like Muslims before the missionaries came with their straight hair and fibroids causing relaxers....

Intruding on our land today with terror, even biological weapons....

And we embrace the Hollywood effect of their gospel without once stopping to think.

Mondisweets:
and what will be wrong with being Ghanian?

U would perhaps have lots of ample

Unless your last name is Nelson


Remember: I have your medicine

2sexi:
no bro. You don't love her. You can't love someone you have no respect for. If you were still in dating phase, I wouldn't have any problem with your stance... But marriage?

Anyway, heart break is one of the major reasons many men would flirt till death.

What do you know about love, marriage or heartbreak

You sincerely think telemundo is a good source of information

Perhaps you should reverse out of this thread please, especially if you have nothing beyond childish cliches to bring to this forum....

Mondisweets:
social experiment indeed I hope know you have learnt that you are more naïve than you think women are

I own you.

You must be Ghanaian.

dovelike:
Hmmm,you are following lots of girls...your whatever (the one that is not your supposed wife to be) has ample ukwu...you are not getting married yet...

Hehehe I cannot get over this your comment. I for pm you too but it's more refreshing meeting women in the real world

But u look like u have some serious ukwu too baby

emusmith:
What's ample ukwu?

That's relative. Enough @$$

Mondisweets:
jesus help me! thats a woman getting a fair share of her own fun on the side too and you are busy thinking she is just keeping herself for you alone?
Hilarious!
Just when we thought its only toddlers that believe in disney fairy-tales. Well here is a grown asssss man who does too


And you on the other hand a like a child who believes toothfairies exist

What of if I told you this whole thread is a social experiment?

I've gleaned your thoughts and those of your peers in order to advance my own agenda.

Have a nice day #missiamtheleaderofNLexpatriatecommunity

2sexi:
OP. Why do you want to marry someone you don't love?

I love her o


I just find myself falling in love with others too


But what has love got to do with it...


DELUDED peeps everywhere

Mondisweets:
jesus help me! thats a woman getting a fair share of her own fun on the side too and you are busy thinking she is just keeping herself for you alone?
Hilarious!
Just when we thought its only toddlers that believe in disney fairy-tales. Well here is a grown asssss man who does too


And you on the other hand a like a child who believes toothfairies exist

Why all this tylenol for my own headache....madam shift Abeg

I know you're her assistant vagin.a but one would think with all the traffic your own va Jay jay has been getting you would calm down

Mondisweets:
im not even Nigerian

Ah. No wonder.

Mondisweets:
boos of what. This is advise coming from a woman. If your woman can easily overlook you cheating, trust me she has done her own too.


Lol i know men like you who have raised children that arent their too

Clown in this era of DNA testing Abi

She should give me a good reason to leave

Pls talk with sense

Mondisweets:
All i can say if may your beautiful wife make you father children that are not biologically yours and since she is beautiful i hope she will have extra-marital affairs and leave you for a man 10times richer than you like Tiger Woods ex-wife. Shout amen someone

Not all beautiful women are whores


You sound like a Yoruba or urhobo woman

Mondisweets:
All i can say if may your beautiful wife make you father children that are not biologically yours and since she is beautiful i hope she will have extra-marital affairs and leave you for a man 10times richer than you like Tiger Woods ex-wife. Shout amen someone

Amen.


Mschew


Maybe u haven't heard the term "boss" before

Mondisweets:
OP if you think women will tolerate you cheating and still remain faithful to you, then u are definitely living in your own little fairy-tale

I sincerely do not care

3cycle:


Nigga is pained....
I can't help you bro, seems you prefer insults to a peaceful discussion.
Kpele

Olodo instead of you to even pray for suitors

Whether na taxi driver u go marry, u never know

Olodo

Missonas:
Yea men will be men.If you hold her that high why don't you take it all the way.From your response though i got that you wouldn't want her to pull thesame stunts.
She deserves more from you brov you know that.You should also know to protect yourself so she does not have more to deal with more from you(hope you get my drift)

I know what u mean hun. Wife to be was a virgin. I was her first.


Side piece claiming virginity but my experience yesterday. We both going to get tested.

My babe doesn't have the same libido I have but she has insisted na me she wan marry, I can't break that heart. I will try to keep her happy. Consciously. In fact that's my primary focus but I will not deny myself.

This practice is for whor.es though

3cycle nor get sense na. No waste your saliva

Them go send Angel marry that one

Olutola88:
*Ma, I agree with you on NOT going for a man that keeps late night.

*I do not see marrying a Christian as a strategy for avoiding a husband that will be unfaithful. I'm sure we are all aware of the fact that many pastors are infidelity warriors.

*I also agree with you on NOT going for a man who has womanizers as friends. Nevertheless it's not always the way think as I've seen some men that have perverts as friends but are still not randy. I know some men that are teetotallers but have drunks as friends( I'm a typical example).

*Finally, you said I should wait till 50 when I might have seen it all. Ma, I completely disagree with you on this. “Seeing it all” has never been and will never be a measure to bring infidelity to a halt. Infidelity is a habit that is easily inculcated and very difficult to stop. The woman species is a very diverse one and randy men always crave to have a taste of a new one.

jmoore:
Ever heard of otapiapia? She is a good woman, abi?
You are still in chapter 1.

A man should cheat but a woman should not cheat according to you. So who are you cheating with, animals or robots?

The fear of adultery is the beginning of common sense.

Lol.

3cycle:
You are not smart at all.... Plain clueless.
She's a Xtian?
Keep living in denial my friend but just so you will know, a woman only tells you what she wants you to know the rest is kept secret.


Your life is already in shambles

I just bust laugh. Ode. You're schooling me?

Olodo rabata.

I'm literally not your mate....any levels

Missonas:
Even though i think you are selfish i think you are truthful and sincere.What's more your women agree with 'your idea of commitment'.

Why don't you suggest an open relationship cos I know you won't like her having various commitments like you intend to #teamonemanonewoman

She is a good God fearing xtian


She won't cheat

Men have offered her car, money, phones etc

She reports all to me, screenshots and all and turns all dem down

That's why she don't know. There are good women in Nigeria but men will be men

3cycle:
Dog.... My dad never cheated on my mum for the years They lived together until his demise.
Yes my dad is one man on planet earth I could vow in his life never had any thing to do with a mistress all his married life and I know we still have such men in our days..

Stupiditi... No one can cheat on you but you can cheat on others? Keep lying to you, let me tell you something, the real reason she agreed to maarry you is because she found out both of you are birds of same feathers, she probaably has a sugaar daddy meeting all her needs while keeping a single guy just so she can get married and be tagged mrs, asides that she might be staying for other benefits.

Stop parading yourself as a player because you just met someone who is like you or better.

Retardo this epistle for me. Lol

Ok na u be the sugar daddy abi

BigBashiru:
the issue of side chicks is an interesting one.

OP while i understand where you are coming from in need for variety, the women cause men to have this side chick mentality.

Men like em young and hot. period.

Men also like variety.

If you dont want a man to have variety then he needs to be married to some 21 year old, 23 max.

Side chick comes in because when women are young they are not ready for marriage...

do you honestly want me to settle for 32 year old and ignore 21 year olds all in the name of marriage?

You must be kidding me.

For me, I dont ask for too much. Just one main young chick that is 21 or 22 max. Its just to avoid cheating. but then again, at this age, they dont want to marry. so maybe modern marriage just cant work?

Even if u marry 18, one day she go 30 and u go sight another 18, in fact after 5 to 6 years of that 18, u go dey reason like bachelor again

Ppl dey carry my matter for head

I understand why the babes are doing it

I understand why the broke niggurs, hypocrites and NL romance seekers are doing it


But my wife to be gave me the ground rules:


Don't get any ho pregnant,

Don't marry wife no. 2


And what u do is none of my business.


Is she tryna kill a niggur?


Lolz

U guys never jam love...love is blind....marry the woman that understands you

Some ppl r in relationship where the babes na lez and the husband dey encourage am (albeit for selfish reasons)

But he doesn't trip....U have to understand your spouse and marriage is acceptance.

She has known from day 1, I will not let any prominent ukwu willing to mingle pass me by unless she is physically present

A lot of the women acting like their husbands are saints, na their damn biz...I saw a Bella naija groom once who spent at least 16m on wedding


Next weekend he was calling our most popular bachelor friend to organize those "Moremi hall shawties again"


Not up to one month after marriage....Make I hear word plz

Tymax:
@ the emboldened; you have said it all! Gbam!

---

@ Topic:

OP you should be wary of the silence of your fiancée. You think any woman would gladly permit cheating in her marriage? She may be planning something big. Bro, just try to reciprocate her faithfulness. For your own good and that of your unborn children.

What she doesn't know won't kill her


A lot of the happily married women in Nigeria have learned to turn a blind eye

Go and seek advice from elders



Only if the man is broke but why should a broke guy even have a mistress?