₦airaland Forum

edwife:
Oh yes darling it is. Nobody will ever make me act out of character. You need discipline and self-control.
How am i responsible for another human-being action? Their actions shouldn't define your person. A good person is a good person no matter the circumstances.

So if your husband is a drunk and irresponsible, that will automatically make you too irresponsible? I didn't know it was transmissible.

What if his actions were also cumulative of what she's been doing(raising her voice,being confrontational,disrespectful,nagging)?Unless he is insane in this case she will never attempt to continue with the marriage; Again not justifying abuse here. After all we only heard her side of the story,no?(which i am not in anyway doubting).

Koolking:
You are in voice mail, Next...

edwife:
I really don't understand your comment but i will try to answer. Where in my post did I excuse his violent attitude? He is violent simple!
So according to you a violent man is a normal human-being? Anything out of character is abnormal.If i am 7 months pregnant i will avoid any form of confrontation especially if i know the person i marry. I can't force him to change who he is but i can definitely make a choice whereby i will never compromise my life. eg: leaving, minding my business or not stand in front of tv in the presence of his brother(which is a sing of disrespect if you ask me) just because i want to have his attention thus being confrontational.



So in your understanding i am not concerned for her because i didn't abuse her husband?
His temper is non of my business, hers is. At 7 months pregnant she should know better than to put herself in danger.



Again irrelevant, doesn't make sense.In my post i told her that she didn't have to rush and have babies without solving underlying issues in her marriage. I failed to see where you were going with this post of yours.

Koolking:
Typically in Lagos with it's peculiar traffic situation, are you saying, it's ideal and reasonable for a wife to wake up by 6am to prepare the children for school and manage to meet up appointments at work by 8/830am? Or meet up with the children school bus coming by 630am? There are situations that require common sense. As a wife, you need not wait for your husband to nag and tell the world. What is responsibility? ..."force that binds you to the courses of action demanded by that force"

For the Op to wake up 4/5am every morning to go to work, it means he lives in a city where traffic is unpredictable.

I still stand my opinion based on observation: The Op wife is irresponsible

Oyind17:
Are you a lady? Where I was working before 7:00 is the resumption time, how can I meet up if I wake by 6am?

The husband knows why he created this thread, Nl itks should leave him alone

lilzcee:
I am sick upstairs

Oyind17:
We are talking of a married woman with some responsibility not a lazy student.

Koolking:
You no nothing about marriage dude. When you are of age, you will understand.

Oyind17:
Kilode!!!!

Oyind17:
I never sleep well for 2 days now, I no dey bed. I do support women if need be, don't expect me to support a write up blindly. if I should say what's in my mind concerning this issue you'll say I don't support women.

When will you prepare breakfast for the kids if they are going to school if you wake up by 6:am? just asking

Koolking:
The rate of laziness by Nigerians is alarming. Most Nigerian girls are sheer lazy. It's only on social media people claimed what they aren't. Nigerians are despicable set of people. Always claim living the life of prince and princesses who live in castles with all the privileges of life in their becks and calls.

How could Africans (Nigerians) lashed mercilessly at the op for expressing his discomfort at his wife's tradition of waking up by 6am? Nigeria is not Telemundo

Even if the Op wife is a full time housewife (she does not work or own her business), a sensible and responsible wife who knows the husband wakes up by 4-5am to leave for work, should also wake up with the husband to assist him leave early. When the hubby leaves, she can go back to her sleep and wakes up as it pleases her.

She can assist in warming up his bath water, make tea/prepare breakfast if the hubby is the type who eats early. How about the kids? Preparing them for school?

If you can't make simple sacrifices to keep your home, then you are not married. You should stay single and do as it pleases you.

Majority opinions of NLers on this thread reek of juvenility, irresponsibility and fecklessness. Opinions like these here makes me believe marriage is a scam.

Op, your wife is just IRRESPONSIBLE.

chigoizie7:
Don't u ever give up?

Ok, my bad, OP should leave his wife alone, he should even allow her to sleep till 10am, no biggie.

In my own reasoning, I think OP is just trying to make his family work according to his own principle. Most times u just want people to think like you.

chigoizie7:
Clap for yourself. U just got yourself a scholarship.

Leave OP and his family let him do what he wants

chigoizie7:
Now u re talking. U guys have ur bath b4 going to bed. That's d diff. OP's family takes their bath after waking up in d morning.

Like I said, 1hr 15mins is not enough for me. I had to wake up, pray, my morning routine,(150 press up and 150 sit up 5 by 30) den head to d toilet to avoid wahala during d day, brush my teeth, bring out cloths to wear, find something to eat(drinking tea is the easiest breakfast but I don't drink tea otherwise I will sleep all day) bath and den cloth myself.



Sweethrt I can't do all those in 1hr 15mins.






Moreover, OP has his reasons.

Have ever lived in lagos b4?

chigoizie7:
For advanced family or new family?

However don't use yourself as a yardstick to measure other people.

@least, your siblings can bath themselves,cloth themselves and even feed themselves.

Why don't you talk about your dad? Probably not in the picture of people to be taken care of in the morning like preparing his breakfast, but OP is around as a father.


For your info, I am the 2nd child of my family, 1st left for UK for akademikz @ 16yrs (she is married now). And anytime we wake up by 6am, everyone in d house must go late to skul or work. I now live alone, and same thing applies.


Did I tell u dat my mum was also a second skul principal?

menix:
Babe abeg blow whistle, u don't preach wat u ve not practiced, anyone waking up by 7am in lagos has got no chores and probably ve a shop infront of his/her house....

Greene66:
With foreign girls, it's easy as pie

ladyF:
I don't even do major chores in the morning. Where is the time sef when you are rushing out? I'd rather work at night and be sure nothing is disturbing my sleep, it's not as if the sleep is even long.

Some people are selfish sha. She should wake up and be looking at his handsome face?

DrDauda:
Pour her cold water at d time u think is right for her to wake up. Thanks me later

chigoizie7:
Lol, going by our nija standards of wives taking care of family feeding and all that. It is late to wake by 6am.

Me sef wey never marry, wey de stay alone, anytime I wake up by 6am due to hang over, I must go to work late that day( distance from my house to my place of work is barely 25mins)

So, imagine a woman with kids to prepare for skul, prepare breakfast for the family,get their luch ready and den prepare herself for work(if she has a job) Oga every member of that family must go late that day.

ladyF:
If you don't have kids yet and your wife isn't working, then I think 6am is fair. Why would you want her to wake up by 4am when she doesn't have what to do? That's just selfishness. Would she just wake up and be looking round the house all in the name of waking up early?

daveyjay:
Poor her a bowl of water very early whenever U want her awake! ThankGod, harmattan dey now, if she doesn't kill you then U will kill her

excellentmomma:
6am. Late? Why don't you start the chores and let her join u, you influence humans better by example not talks.

She prolly shares home bills with you, then you won't allow her do the work when and how she can. Is there any work left undone @ d end of the day? You will wake up 4am, cross leg and your only job is watch when she will wake abi? Change abeg