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SMALLPENIS's Posts

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Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:51am On Sep 05, 2014
Mr Love grin

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:50am On Sep 05, 2014
what a loser

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:49am On Sep 05, 2014
what a dickhead

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:46am On Sep 05, 2014
this doctor is a p.o.r.nstar

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:45am On Sep 05, 2014
can someone just chew his cork already!

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:44am On Sep 05, 2014
the guy with a C.litoris grin

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:43am On Sep 05, 2014
when a dick turns to a shoemaker, we call it Cobbledick

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op):
HELP! HIS CORK IS ON FIRE!

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:40am On Sep 05, 2014
100 dicks make a pound

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:39am On Sep 05, 2014
grandma, we already know that shit is Brown, some are black sha grin

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:37am On Sep 05, 2014
what a dickshit

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:37am On Sep 05, 2014
Enormous Dick grin

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:34am On Sep 05, 2014
I won't talk

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:33am On Sep 05, 2014
3. Anu is a nice name, but doesn't go well with apostrophe.

Jokes EtcRe: 20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op): 11:30am On Sep 05, 2014
2. His dick is smashing! grin

Jokes Etc20 Funniest Most Unfortunate Names Of People (+PICTURES) by SMALLPENIS(op):
It's really funny what names parents would give their children, Wetin we no go see for oyibo land?

1. Jesus and c*ndom ??

GamingRe: Can you remember this Game ? by SMALLPENIS(f): 9:52am On Sep 05, 2014
I loved that game,when my neighbours were'nt around I begged my sisters to play.
#ThoseDays
HealthRe: How To Get Rid Of Pimples Naturally by SMALLPENIS(f): 9:32am On Sep 05, 2014
As A Neat Guy,I dont have pimples,thats why the girls call me #SPOTLESS smiley
GamingRe: My Become A Legend Story (+PICTURES)(Comedy Mode) by SMALLPENIS(op): 6:38am On Sep 05, 2014
ezzylee: hey mehn....sorry for not replying early.was out throughout today.
Not reducing the difficulty was a good idea coz it's when something is hard,thats when the fun nd enjoyment is gotten.and also you know you cant win every game now...
yea,the adrenaline when I was playing that Arsenal match was crazy!
LiteratureRe: My Childhood Life With My Spoilt Neighbours by SMALLPENIS(f): 6:32am On Sep 05, 2014
sosalekins: lol... I was influenced, buh it seems yours is original.... Jes continue reading brov, you aint see nothing yet.
I was influenced too. grin
LiteratureRe: My Childhood Life With My Spoilt Neighbours by SMALLPENIS(f): 11:20pm On Sep 04, 2014
sosalekins: ********CONTINUATION********
.............. '' bro.Felix told me that co.ndom.s are used to prevent pregnancy'' - I said to my mom
## My mom was shocked when she heard this. She asked me alotta questions on where i got to know about it and where i saw it......... I honestly answered everything she asked.
She then explained to me that there are certain things children are not supposed to know about. But as they grow up, the'll eventually get to find out.
She was somewhat infuriated.##
____________________________________
*********NEXT DAY********
I was in my mom's car waiting for her to drive me to school when i saw her talking with bro.Felix's mom ( am sure it was concerning what her son had taught me).
After her long talk with bro.felix's mom, we drove to school.##
_______________________________________
'' why did'ntt you come to school yesterday?'' - I asked Nonso
'' i was not feeling fine. my mom took me to the chemist, on our way back home, we came to the school to pay my fees'' - Nonso replied
'' okay, i thought you had been caught doing something bad.'' - I uttered
'' hahahah, no.. Besides, Esther came to my house yesterday, she said you've not been talking to her'' - Nonso muttered
* i hissed*
'' don't mind her, she's angry that Tasha offered me a drink'' - I replied
'' yeah, Esther also told me that. But that Tasha is fine o'' - Nonso said.
## we chatted for some minutes before we heard the bell rang for assembly.
We dashed out.
Normal assembly processes ensued and ended. We then marched to various classes and took our individual seats.
I sat on my seat when i saw Esther brought her bag to the sit before me (Yoma's seat).
I was somewhat surprised and noticed she was all smiling and joyful.
I did'ntt pay attention.##
'' no! Don't sit there, Yoma is a noise maker, so are you! You'll both turn the class upside down if you sit together. Go and sit with Lekins'' - Mr Ojo instructed Esther
# i was transfixed as i watched her take her bag from Yoma's seat and sat beside me.
The class was about to commence when Yoma's dad signaled the presence of Mr Ojo.
They both walked outside to talk (am sure it was probably because of the balloons that Yoma brought to school).#
'' how come did you get uncle to change your seat?'' - I asked
'' I told him that Adewunmi (Esther's initial seatmate) usually disturbs me in class and am unable to concentrate'' -Esther replied.
'' so you lied, all liars shall go to hell'' - I uttered
'' don't you lie? '' - Esther countered
## few seconds later Mr Ojo has'nt returned, I noticed Esther got closer to me and placed my hands on her thighs.##
'' what if uncle comes in and sees us''- I muttered silently
'' how will uncle be able to see us when we're sitting at the back? '' - she replied
I did'ntt decline any further.
# i slightly raised her gown beyond her kneel and started using my left hand to massage her inner thighs ( The crap all started when we were in primary 3 as I innocently tapped her on her thighs to get her attention.
She was like----- continue!)
* minutes had passed and Mr Ojo was'ntt returning soon.
Esther then rested her head on the desk to obstruct Yoma from seeing anything that was happening*
i then moved my hands............##

***** story continues joor!*****
stay locked!
I did that shit in primary one,thank God na just massage sha.,why is your childhood kinda like mine??
LiteratureRe: My Childhood Life With My Spoilt Neighbours by SMALLPENIS(f): 11:11pm On Sep 04, 2014
sosalekins: ********CONTINUATION*******

............... While she gave me a satchet of 'capri sonne' (a soft drink).
I refused to accept it. She insisted but i did'nt relent. '' thank you, i have something to drink" i muttered while pointing at the bottle of milk in my lunch box.
## she did'nt insist any further and went to her sit.. I could see her handling it over to Tola who asked for it.##

## few minutes had passed, a classmate of mine called Yoma- who sat in front of me came into the class looking all sweaty and dirty after he must has played away his time during the brake.
I was still eating as he brought out a balloon from a pack.
I was keenly interested to see it. Cus i had never seen a balloon with a satchet before!
''what is that'' - I asked.
'' blom blom (ballon).. I saw it in my dad's drawer '' - Yoma replied

'' and you just took it like that, what if he notices you took his balloon?'' - I asked

'' how can my dad be playing with balloon? Am sure He bought it for me and my sister in order to surprise us.'' - He replied

'' ok, please can i have one? '' - I requested

'' its remaining just two pack, one for me, and one for my sister. You did'nt ask on time, i gave the rest to some of our classmates.'' - He replied
''ok, can i just blow it?'' - i asked.
'' lemme blow it for you since you're eating.'' - he replied.

'' why is the mouth of the balloon so wide ? And the body is long?'' - i asked
'' its a special kind of balloon that they sell at the super market, its not like the ones you buy for N5 .. Can't you see it has oil on the body, so that it won't burst on time'' - He replied me.

## The dude started blowing the BALLOON as i tried to touch it until Mr Ojo sighted us.##
'' what are you holding?'' - Mr Ojo
asked.
'' its balloon'' - Yoma answered
'' let me see it, (He collected it).. Who gave it to you?'' - Mr Ojo asked

'' my dad bought it for me'' - Yoma replied
'' is this the only one you have?'' - Mr ojo asked while collecting the pack from Yoma.
'' no, one is still inside and i gave some to.. (started calling the names of pupils he gave the other satchets to'' - Yoma replied
## Mr ojo ordered Yoma to call the pupils he gave the BALLOONs to.
Yoma did as instructed, and they lined in front of him. He asked them where the balloons they collected were. Some said they through theirs away cus it was difficult to blow. ##

## i sat on my sit confused while i saw Mr Ojo took the register and punched on his phone like he was somewhat collecting a number from the register. He stood far from us still holding the BALLOONs as he spoke on phone ( i guess He was Speaking to Yoma's dad due to what happened at school the next day) .
After making his call, MR Ojo approached us and told us never to bring those kinda balloons to school ever again##
'' ok uncle, but why uncle?'' - I asked looking confused

# The man looked at me and I could see he was'ntt pleased with my question ( Though he always told us to ask him questions while he taught us) ..
Mr Ojo approached me and.......................


*story continues*
Blom blo for the SMALLPENIS! hehehe!
LiteratureRe: My Childhood Life With My Spoilt Neighbours by SMALLPENIS(f): 11:00pm On Sep 04, 2014
sosalekins: I swiftly walked home as i heard a familiar voice beckoned on me..
I turned to look, Behold it was Nonso running towards me.
'' Leke , hope that mad man did'nt beat you badly (referring to Emma) , cus i saw him threatening to beat Isaac for not voting for him' -Nonso uttered
'' He was about to when someone helped me'' - I replied
And Nonso added-
'' you're so lucky. by the way, don't mind him. Afterall, you are the class rep, you can report him to Mr Ojo.
And please, allow me write names of noise makers tomorrow. Abeg!''

''if that is your problem, ok, you can write, but don't write Esther's name'' - I replied

Nonso laughed while saying '' i forgot she's your wife.
well by the way, that new girl Tasha, she was among the people that voted for you o, she was the only girl that raised her hand to vote for you ''
I was surprised and was speechless for a moment, I then uttered '' well, I'll thank her tomorrow''
' i also noticed she was always looking at you' -Nonso replied

''come, is that not the way to your house, (pointing to the direction).. So bye bye'' - i intruded
same thing happened to me when I was in secondary school,the new girl was an indian though,her name was Ananya and she voted for me to be class rep,we later dated sha.I was later the Head Boy.
When you're goodlooking,things go your way grin
InvestmentRe: READ | Cockroach Farming Can Make You A Millionaire ! by SMALLPENIS(f): 10:40pm On Sep 04, 2014
I must click that link!
CelebritiesRe: Petite Versus Tallest Nollywood Actresses ( Photos ) by SMALLPENIS(f): 10:15pm On Sep 04, 2014
I just dey look.
SportsRe: Who Is Nigeria's Greatest Footballer Of The Last 20 Years? by SMALLPENIS(f): 9:24pm On Sep 04, 2014
Okocha!!!
RomanceRe: Share Your Nicknames And How You Got Them - It Could Be Romantic Or Funny by SMALLPENIS(f): 8:47pm On Sep 04, 2014
Hmmm,mine is SMALLPENIS ; Got the name due to the ironic things I say,like when I told my roommates that I had a 1.5inch SMALLPENIS,the idiots checked me when I was sleeping and found out I was actually carrying a 7inch SNAKE grin
they started calling me the name afterwards,or SMALL-DINGDONG.
It has actually helped because I surprise girls at the end of the day. wink
GamingRe: My Become A Legend Story (+PICTURES)(Comedy Mode) by SMALLPENIS(op): 8:22pm On Sep 04, 2014
GDB News

GDB beat Toulouse 3:0,with Danny scoring a goal and making an assist,and Fernando scoring the last goal.
GDB will be playing Barcelona next in Spain in the 2nd Leg of the Champions League Semi Finals.They'll need just a goal to clinch the victory.
GamingRe: My Become A Legend Story (+PICTURES)(Comedy Mode) by SMALLPENIS(op): 8:14pm On Sep 04, 2014
Champions League Semi-Finals 1st Leg

The 1st half was pretty tough for GDB where Barcelona had 4chances but failed to put them away.
Danny got the GDB faithful singing his praises after scoring 10mins into the 2nd half from a mistake from Julio Ceasar.
The manager substituted Danny in the 70th min to rest him for the 2nd leg.
Howver,GDB's celebrations were shortlived after Bale equalised for Barcelona in the 80th min.The match ended 1:1.GDB will need just a goal at Barcelona's home in the 2nd Leg to get to the Finals.
GamingRe: My Become A Legend Story (+PICTURES)(Comedy Mode) by SMALLPENIS(op): 7:58pm On Sep 04, 2014
GDB News

The League Matches Updates;

GDB 1:0 O.Marseille (Danny made an assist to Xabi Alonso in the FRENCH CUP semis to send GDB to the french cup Finals)

Stade Rennais 0:2 GDB (Danny made 2assists)

GDB will be facing Barcelona next in the 1st Leg of the Champions League Semi-Finals.
GamingRe: My Become A Legend Story (+PICTURES)(Comedy Mode) by SMALLPENIS(op): 7:50pm On Sep 04, 2014
2nd Leg Of The Champions League Quarter-Finals

GDB got off to a good start after Michel Bastos slotted home the opener in the 12th min after a confusion in the keepers box.
Danny further increased the lead in good form in the 82nd min.
The game got to extra time and Danny did well to control a cross from Danze and slot it home in the 1st half of extra time.
GDB changed to an all defensive formation to prevent Arsenal from equalising.The game ended 3:0 in favour of GDB giving them an aggregate of a 3:2 win.
The team couldnt hide their feelings as they carried Danny on their shoulders.,
GDB drift into the semi-finals to face Barcelona.many are already calling the game a Win to Barcelona but GDB say they are determined to do their best even if they dont get to the finals.

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