₦airaland Forum

Yusufisraelj:
Base on what Oga! LWKMD
Oh my my, ribs day pain me, this guy you funny.

missyojo:
I don't have a job for you but I will be on the lookout if I see anyone that matches your field.

Where are you based and what's your educational qualification?

Molahnelson:
Here you go again settle down, change that narrative you are a man years is with you not like a woman which is age is not behind her

the moment you change the narrative about love and settle down you will see that you start having a propellant thought

Molahnelson:
then channel your energy towards yourself, take a break from that love of a thing because sometimes love drain you of your energy of your focus

Molahnelson:
So if you eventually can find a job (God forbid) what will you do?

Molahnelson:
It will make him work on his better version of himself,
it will also give him an understanding that marriage was not necessary now

pcguru1:
How will RedPilll help him out ? he needs a job.

Molahnelson:
Forget about that marriage for now and embrace redpill then thank us later

pcguru1:
Times have changed so you might need to re-skill, I will be honest with you, Women have a very good way of sorting themselves out, so focus on yourself for now. There are some skills but I will be honest it is not easy especially for someone with no experience labour market dey harsh. but if you can apply to some of those gig sites if you get laptop or from LinkedIn. But like someone said you might need to leave the house and scout and just tell people you don't mind taking any job. it won't be easy my brother. I will monitor this thread

missyojo:
Op, you are not serious. What you should think of is how to get a job. Ask people for job not financial assistance to marry.
Let me ask you a question, if they give you financial assistance to get married. How do you sustain the marriage? Or do you think marriage is beans without you having a source of income?

You had better sit your girlfriend abii it's fiancee down and think of how you both will make money before venturing into marriage.

Nazgul:
We're still in the first week of January, the year is still young. There's every possibility that you can get a job if you put in more effort and back it with prayers.

I'll also advice you to intensify your search. Jobs won't come knocking on your door. You have to go out there and struggle to get it. Make a move.

pcguru1:
Mehn sorry bro I can imagine, you want to hustle but how long can one hustle before he has enough for marriage. What did you study in school, do you have any skill ?

kings59:
Post your new year picture let us see how beautiful or handsome you are.

imdavid704:
So my dad bought this creepy bird home for Christmas, I am even scared of eating it, pls nairalanders are this bird edible for consumption, does it has any side effect after eating.

Anoymus:
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal.
Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does.

After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this.

The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money.

I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding?

My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis.

I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her.

I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate?

Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks

StagethemTVee:
Singer L.A.X has taken to social media to announce the delivery of his 2 new automobiles, a Mercedes Benz and Prado.



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoVmmF_O1H0

Gayatri:
I do not know how to start this but i will write as it comes... I was in a 2 year relationship that ended in march this year.. I was so commited in it like naturally when im dating, i DO NOT notice other guys and i DO NOT ask my boyfriend for financial assistance because i feel im not his responsibility,, what i do appreciate mostly were little things like, chatting, kindness, hugs, opening and closing of doors for me,, just little things, coz i adore them so much.. But anyway it ended.. And i vowed never to date again come what may.. During the break up process, all my friends (guys, hardly have a girlfriend) were there to help me pull through.. Calls and texts constantly because, according to them, they knew my type, thus the help.. Funny enough, i never got attracted to any of them (even the ones that initially asked me out when my friendship with them was fresh) and im not the sex sex type to just fall for any to satisfy my desire.. Though i got advice from neighbours to find someone else than staying alone, i said no especially as i am a loner but a happy loner.. I keep myself busy with work or any stuff that makes me happy.

Fine, two months later (june), some guy reached out to me even as he knew he's got a girlfriend, whixh according to him later, they were in an open relationship.. He stays in oshogbo, his girl stays in kaduna while im in sagamu..Before then, he reached out online by first stalking me on facebook (even though we did same online business), after a while he got talking with me.. At first, i was harsh, very harsh to him but he never minded.. At a point i stopped talking to him.. A month later he reached out again, asking if we were still friends.. I was like yeah, not nice to him at all but he was patient with me..

From mid-july we started talking well as friends, he was very open as i was to him. We flowed well that things were happening to us coincidentally.. Whenever he yawns, i do at my place, if im having a scratch, he does too.. There was just plenty of this connection that we never got tired of each other.. In the procesa of our been honest, he told me about his girl and how she was still keeping her ex and all whatnots... I didnt feel any iota of jealousy because i had not feelings for him yet.. I asked to talk things through with his girl and he says well if she gave the chance.. So laters, by august, september,october, feelings grew.. He got so fond of me... According to him, he has not seen my type before.. Fine! During my birthday, he wanted to do something for me, i said no, then two weeks to his birthday in nov, he asked that i visit him at their family house, that i did..

What struck me most was how the elder brother (married) took care of me... I was not allowed to do nothing.. The brother even cooked for me.. God, it made me fall more for the family.. The kind gestures i have never experienced in my life.. There are kindnesses but there is kindness, the real one.. I felt it.. Every thing that i want in a man, those little things, this guy has them all.. According to him, it baffles him that with the little he shows me, i do not take for granted even before he told me he's having a girl..

When i returned home, we continued our normal talks and he then said, that his girlfriend would be visiting during his birthday.. At that point i went silent.. (Meanwhile he met his girl this year but before me, also during her break up).. He was unhappy that i displayed this little jealousy.. So he says he has not broken up with his girl to start a new relationship and he is hurting that he is hurting me.. He's got feelings for me but he loves his girl.. So i said i was going walk, even though i never meant it, twas hard to even say that but i had to and he says no... That he's become so attached to me even his family thinks he's dating me.. That he controls his feelings for me, could i do same and i said no.. I could not be friends with him when i know that feelings are involved.. Finally, we came to terms to just flow with things since he was not engaged or married to her.. Even so, this guy just lost his job and he says unlike his girl, im the one pushing him to have something doing, he says i help him alot but i wouldnt know.. So we continued to let the whole feelings to flow until last week, when with my help, he was called for an interview in lagos..

As usual we talked and i wished him well.. I always pray for him.. In lagos, we talked well until the third day, our communication changed and before it did, my heart was literally aching, so i knew something was wrong.. I called to know why but he was telling me that he'd let me in when he got back to oshogbo, which he did.. He said his girlfriend who was having something to do with her ex, called him and wanted to settle things with him.. But the truth is, because this lady already had his facebook password when they were together in kadauna, she 3 days before her birthday on the 8th of this month wanted to know why her boyfriend was no longer perturbed over her behaviour, so she saw my chats with the guy and decided to do something,,, this now pushed to talk things out with the bf and apologise to him.. Then she asked him if anything was going on between is and he said no.. That we just friends,close friends.. He lied to her but opens up to me.. He says he doesnt want the girl to ask him to cut me off totally.. So the whole thing got him confused.. He says he's never double dated and he isnt happy that he's hurting me and im taking it... I asked him again if i should walk and he says no.. He does not want to lose me and i do not want to lose him either but i want to prove my love for him so that he one day sees that the girl, probably loves him but she's got no integrity.. And i purely love him.. But because i respect his relationship, i CAN NOT TELL HIM TO BREAK UP WITH HER but wanting him to see things himself but the question is for how long.. He says they are working things out now but he doesnt want to lose me esp as a friend... Difficult.. Out of God knows what, we agreed to let things flow since i will respect his relationship, like whenever his girl is around, i should make him believe that i will be fine.. Now, he isnt happy because he said if he hadnt met the gf, he'd have gone ahead to date me.. For me, i cannot sleep, ive been typing this since God knows when and this is 3:36am.. Since he is confused now, please people, friends, family, can i use love to make him see the difference between his girl and me.. He loves his girl, he is controlling his feelings for me and afraid to let it grow because he knows we'd bond, while my feelings toward him is real.. Money has not been involved in this.. We are 6months now.. I believe in true love and that it does not come easy.. Talk to me Y'll because i have no parents to talk to,, i would have talked to my mum now but she isnt here... I want to win with true love.. I turned 27 this past november and he turned 30 same november.. Thank You and God bless..

no1concept:
Dear Nairalanders,

This post was made by me on behalf of my cousin concerning a current situation he is in and would really love to get the much advice he can about this.

My cousin met this girl 3 years ago when he just finished Youth service and of course, didn't have much financially. He asked her out and the girl readily agreed. Ever since then, it has been a wonderful relationship for the both of them. This girl tolerates my cousin's flaws even when he might be in a bad mood. This girl landed a job before my cousin and through out the 8 months he was jobless, she always stood by him and never cheated once on him. She loves my cousin to the Moon and back.

After my cousin finally landed his first job here in Nigeria, he started applying for jobs in Scotland cos he really had the intention of relocating. He got frustrated after he couldn't land the Scotland jobs after 2 years and gave up. His girl always cheered him up and told him not to give up. She immediately took over the job applications for him which she made every single day from her place of work on her office computer. She, in addition, fasted and prayed for my cousin without his knowledge for him to land his dream job in Scotland.

5 months later, my cousin got an interview and landed the job. He is about relocating.

Now, my cousin is in a dilemma. He has strong intentions about marrying this girl but doesn't know what his moving to the Scotland may result. He can't marry her right now not make arrangements to relocate with her due to the high financial cost. So he intends on leaving first to later come back for her. However, he is absolutely oblivious of what being away from her for too long may cause and would not wish to stay away too long, get entwined with too much work that he forgets about her which will break the girl's heart. Although he and the girl has talked about this, she has said she would wait for him no matter how long it took but has said that the ball is in the court of cousin to decide.

So, my cousin came to me and I have come to you dear Nairalanders.

He is asking if there is a greater advantage in him continuing with the girl all the way from Scotland, defying a long distance relationship or if he should simply end the relationship by the simple reason of not breaking the girl's heart in the long run.

Note: My cousin lives this girl sooo much but wouldn't want to see her get hurt by him.

Yours opinions are very much needed.

Opinions can be given without need for sentimental insults please. Thank you.

Ohthinktwice:
Considering how difficult it was to get admission into the University, one would think that once that happened, someone's problems would be over, however that often turns out to be the beginning of an entirely different problem which wouldn't be solved until one had successfully graduated from the University.

Then after the celebration of graduation was over, the reality soon sets in about how all that effort, time and resources, etc being invested into getting a University degree was basically to make one able to get a good job.

A few graduates are lucky enough to get a job immediately afterwards, but most have to wait. And the time of waiting differs from individual to individual. Some have to wait for months, some up to a year, others have wait to for up five years and even more.

So what category do you fall into? He long did you have to wait before you got a job after graduation?

Share your experiences here so others could learn a thing or two to help them prepare for life after graduation.

Cheers.

Emteebee:
Facial application. Btw, only use the white, so you have to know how you are going seperate the white from the yolk.