₦airaland Forum

OgwuEgo:
Your dp is too pretty, May I know you?

Men of little thoughts, why would your eyes move faster than your Brain? Just because he picture is uploaded unto a profile and other visual information states female doesn't mean that is what all they seem.

booksbo0k:
Sorry for the long write up my people, I need advice.

My first son has been behaving somehow in our family, as if he's not part of this family...
You and this boy can be in the same house but you might not set your eyes on him once for a whole day. He will be inside his room through out...

He has been telling me that he is currently working on going to rent his own place and live on his own and that if God helps him and he is able to achieve that, He will not have anything to do with our family again and that we will never set eyes on him ever again :[ ...

I would have not been bothered by such statement if it were coming from someone else, I would take it as a bluff. But this my son is someone that normally doesn't call people to check on them, not even us his parents..

When he was in his previous University before he dropped out, this boy can go for months, that is a whole semester stretch without calling anybody to know how you're doing, except you call him or maybe he wants to ask for money for something or school stuff....

We have five children and he is the first, the second and third children are away in University, he and the two last siblings are the only one's with us.. My husband refused him from going to University in a far place instead he gives him transport money to be going to his own University from home everyday...... He and his father don't even talk again except good morning greetings. He is only 21 ohh..

Let me give you guys small back story so that you can understand how all these things started.

My son graduated from secondary school (a boarding school) in 2017 at 16 years old... Initially, he said he wanted to study computer science as he said that was the course he loved and wanted to study. But my husband refused and persuaded him to study pharmacy because he worked at NAFDAC and he saw the way pharmacy graduates were living at his work place and the salary they were recieving. He and one of his chemist friend sweet talked him into going to study the course and I guess it was because he was young then and could not challenge his dad then that was why he gave in....

He wrote JAMB but he did not meet the cut of mark for pharmacy (but I later realised his score was good for computer science then)... No public University was willing to admit him for pharmacy then because his score was not good for the course but due to my husband love for the course and not wanting my son to lose admission that year , he decided to go the way of private University not minding their school fees...Long story cut short, my son got admitted into Madonna University where we were paying 1M naira every year.....After 3 years in the school and in 300L @18 years old, he began saying he was not interested in the school any longer, that he was tired of the course, that he's body is no longer in the school and blablabla that he wants to go and play football in Europe...

He came back for holiday during the beginning of covid and refused to go back to the school when they resumed, saying that he was only wasting our money by being in that school and he did not want to continue.....This got my husband really sad and angry....My son stayed home for almost two years doing nothing because my husband was adamant that if he would not go back to school, nothing for him, that all the money he has spent for school fees in that school can not be for waste that he can become a footballer after he graduates, saying no one can become a successful footballer without being a graduate, that it would later affect them in life...

But my son refused. I must confess, my son is extremely good at playing football. That was the talent i can confidently say that God personally gave to him from birth. Infact when he was graduating from secondary school, they gave him the award for the best graduating footballer and he was always the centre of attention anytime he plays at our church events. He friends used to call him "nima" then, I think...

I and my husband got tired of him staying at home for long so I went to meet with one pastor in our street who was based in the UK with his family but comes home sometimes for church related matters. I explained my son's situation to him and he offered to help my son travel out to chase his football career provided we have the funds for it. The man was secondary school class mates with "victor ikpe ekong" who was a former super eagles player but currently a pastor in Sweden. To my greatest surprise he called him on a WhatsApp video call in my presence and i was really surprised...He gave me the man's phone number to keep in contact and also scheduled a day to meet with my husband and have a discussion.. I told my son and he was very happy..I also told my husband and he was eager to meet with him at least, anything to solve my sons idleness at the time..

The pastor came to my our house on several occasions and discussed with my husband. My husband kept telling the pastor, saying he would like my son to be going to school while chasing his football career at the same time, a feat which pastor let us know would be difficult as one has to be dropped for the other. Unfortunately, my husband changed he's mind and said he was no longer interested in the whole footballer thing. He said he knew that my son wanted to become a footballer only because of girls. That he, my son knew that if he becomes a footballer, all the girls would like him, that that was the only reason he wanted to become a footballer, and that if football was his true destiny, he doesn't need to travel out for it to manifest, that he can be in Nigeria and make it from here.....That was how that chapter close like that. Pastor left for England few months after.....

After years of my son staying at home, my husband got tired. One night, he hired some Street thugs to come take my son away and beat him up...my son stayed with them for 2 weeks. When he returned, he said he was ready to go back to school. But my husband told him he won't be going back to any private University again. My son wrote jamb again to study computer science and was admitted into COOU. but my said he would not allow him go to any University that is not in the same state we are residing. Now the problem here was that all the public schools in the state we are staying will not accept you to study computer science unless you did chemistry in jamb. And my son did not do chemistry in jamb because he is not good in chemistry. If he was to study in the same state we were staying, he had to settle for another course, which he did...Now another problem arose. My husband refused to rent an apartment for my son around the school because the school is considerably far from our house, instead he decided to be giving him money (2000) everyday as transport fare to be going from home. This did not sit down well with my the boy and he again, said he was no longer interested in schooling again sef that he can't be going such far distance from home to the school everyday to study a Course he does not even like siting that it would be stressful and affect his academics and that it was unwise to be paying 60k a year as school fees while you spend 2k everyday as transport..My husband got angry and called on our estate CSO to come pick him up. They beat him so badly in public that when he got back home later in the evening, I went to check him in his room, his buttocks and back where scarred and red with huge marks...

Ever since, he has been going to the school from home and he has become very distant from us especially his dad. They don't talk again in the same house except "good morning sir"...

My son has turned into something else. He can stay indoors from morning till night. I would have said he has started keeping bad company but he does not even have a single friend, not one..Nobody calls him, and he doesn't call anybody...I have five children and he is the first. The second and third already gained admission this year in a private University and are in school currently, so he and he's last two siblings are the only one's with us now..

Why I'm writing this is because I'm scared..I'm beginning to fear that my son might commit suicide, he's beginning to show that kind of attitude.. And the plans he have to leave us forever to go and stay alone, I don't like it ohhhh...

Nairalanders please I need your advice.

From my perspective he's a lone wolf. When I underwent assessment in the military then, one of my attributes was a lone wolf trait. Which further informed them on what area of operations I should be placed. And the rest they say is history. And prior to that I didn't see or visit my family for 8 years, even after leaving the military I do stay on my own.

Wanting to stay alone doesn't mean I hate my family, it's just a trait he will fully immense himself into and slowly mould into. This will be his defining moments, because most people will classify such traits of introverts. But most introverts waste their lives not been productive except those that are in the IT or telecommunications Field.

All you can do is always remind him that your love and that of the family will never die. Because blood is blood and it can never be replaced.

lhordspy:
Kingsley Moghalu, former deputy governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) reacts to the ongoing insult and social media cancelling of Nobel laureate Wole Soyinka by the Obidients group.

* Prof. Wole Soyinka had earlier criticise the
"do-or-die attitude and provocations” of Labour party Presidential/Vice presidential candidates and their supporters, adding that it is unacceptable that Datti-Ahmed Baba is trying to dictate to the supreme arbitier of the nation.



https://twitter.com/MoghaluKingsley/status/1643783541925322753?t=0opkMYBn12ddsHmL7fB8Iw&s=19



https://www.thecable.ng/moghalu-to-obidients-soyinka-a-fighter-for-justice-survived-dictators-he-will-survive-you/amp

You are a deadly propagandist, there was no way he mentioned obidients but you job is always to sow a seed of discord and hate. You are on a mission to invoke genocidal drive, but let me tell you something. Before your propaganda gains any roots you will be just a wet job. Continue pushing hate that will lead to genocide and I guarantee you that the resultant action will be a flash right in front of your eyes.

Not far from the Truth

madridguy:
I am just laughing at your sense of reasoning Professor. You and your likes can wail till tomorrow your Middlebelt discussion will never fly. You failed to divide the Yorubas through religion lines, you will fail again because by the time the North Central answer you again maybe your next destination will be North East.

You never fail to impress me with your foolish talk. Now everyone is Igbo, now everyone is part of every other tribe trying to accomplish the messed up thoughts in your head. Congratulations

madridguy:
What you just said is about APC and PDP. The States you mentioned voted for the candidates of their choice. So this has nothing to do with what you are saying.

You are just another tool with no intellectual capacity to engage constructive talks. Clouded by hypocrisy and propaganda,. majority of all you say is utter nonsense and rubbish, clear danger of been a tool for propaganda.

Ynix:
Use $1000 to start a digital based business like blogging or mobile app then spend another $500 on personal branding and your financial and skill development by buying books, taking courses, use $100 to register a company to position yourself for opportunities.
The remaining amount use it to buy cheap products and sell online.

If you follow my advice you can *10 in a year.

I would love to have conversations with you and follow up if you don't mind, you can chat me up on 08184397113

Please stop giving advice that's bound to fail. Not everyone or business need your service. Let him focus on services and business people need daily.

All mentioned above can be equated to the life which is a battlefield, which comes in multiple dimensions. Sometimes when you with that girl and are already in the state of sex, snap out of it and tell her not today. This action will rapidly elevate your mindset and kill the irrational actions that is associated with the urge to want to have sex. When you study your salary and the expenditure, get basic supplies you don't need. Like in Nigeria terms garri, sugar and salt. Have these basic items at home, when you are in a scenario where you cash is running out before months end don't panic. Let the money follow it's natural diminishing order, if it does eventually feed on that garri for the duration of days. Don't ask anyone or borrow from anyone to eat. By doing so you are removing the false security associated with empathy. Which will reset your mindset in a elevated manner.

If you are broke guy dating a girl, give what you can even from the little you have. Reason is that in battle you should have the ability to lead under constraint. This goes a long way in elevating your mindset in terms of working under pressure. Most married men go through this but majority of them cave in

Young men should learn how to cultivate a military mindset. Technically learn to kill emotions every day for a lengthy period of years. I say young men because it's at a young age such development and programming can take place. So that as you grow older conditions of life can only toughen you to become resistant.

Suicide is like a false bright light, just like someone coming up with a brilliant idea. The only difference is the mind have snapped to accept dying just as you accept living. It's a very thin line that separates the two, like crossing over before actually crossing over.

But with a programmed mindset you can easily walk your way back, just like soldiers in the battlefield. Soldiers training core is the acceptance they will die on the battlefield, so the training is to enhance their capacity to execute a mission before the eventuality. it's during the mission their mindset constantly evolves. Therefore their subconsciousness to survive becomes activated and therefore balances the initial indoctrination of them been in the business of dying.

Major7:
Yes the west may be going too far but putin should also stop playing God by determining the faith of this countries,they're free nation and not under Russia. He should be man enough by starting to defend his keep as well and no one is stopping russia from expanding their alliance as well. let peace rain abeg

Majority of people on this forum are dumb to understand this. Every sovereign nation have the right to choose their friends.

As a none football fan or follower, Liverpool stands a chance of winning this game. Because that have lot of things at stake than Chelsea. Either ways good luck to both sides and their fans.

lhordspy:
NATO keep projecting themselves as peace maker but in real sense; they are the real troublemaker, the aggressor.

You are trying to encircle Russia with nuclear weapons by expanding along its border, placing weapons in its surrounding country and you expect Russia to fold its hand, close its eyes and go to sleep?

Something the Hypocritical Un!ted State wont take from anyone. A country that almost nuked its neighbour; Cuba in 1962, just because Russia started building military base there. If not for Russia pulling out and allowing peace to reign. Cuba would have evaporated into dust by now just like Hiroshima and Nagasaki (both nuked by this same US).

Something the U.S cant take, they go around dishing it to others. Afterall they control the media and the mind of the people. All they had to do is spin the narratives like they are doing the world a favour by trying to create unrest and war everywhere.

Peacemaker indeed.

Shut the Bleep up you tool, better mind your useless political irrelevance of supporting evil. It's in your blood to support evil and nothing good. You think your idiocy on the evil APC you support will have any relevance on the global stage? Go tell this to a fin and watch how they will turn you into manure.

They are both lovely colors.

traihit:
If you're truly elderly as they claim (your posts here don't indicate that by the way), I'm sure you'd be wishing you have an industrious son like that lawyer-cum-singer that we call Falz.

People like him are the voice of reason against people like you.

The person behind that moniker is a worthless and jobless entity. I have never seen someone with zero purpose other than spew garbage day in and day with a disillusion.

IyaebeTheGreat:
Then he should leave our party boldly and stop being sneaky. Asiwaju don't need his type around him.

Shut it, you are truly shameless.

muyico:
Modern slavery

That's why you can't work for the DSS, DIA OR NIA and some section of the security apparatus.

Why is nairaland looking like 4chan? They can copy from reddit if they are running Short of ideas.

Interesting

Fearyourcreator:
How many igbos dey use innoson sef... Cuz you wan start unity fight again...

Look I have lived in Nigeria long enough to say all I have said so far. Let's call a spade a spade, also my assertion is based on my interactions with different level of government. I train personnels from top level government agencies and I can tell lots of politics is in full play, but it's none of business neither is it my affair.

Princeton92:
You have IVM cars??

I am seriously confused why Nigeria will flood poor Chinese cars into Nigeria over inosson vehicles. I have driven IVM and would I was very impressed, the body works is solid and engine smooth. All countries in the world have national pride, which is reflected in their home made products. Every developed nations have first their products then others, but in Nigeria is the other way round. Like I always tell my Nigerian wife, Nigeria is just a collection of people in a geographical space. Therefore true unity is none existence and just an illusion.

Interesting

Useless scammer

emmanuelbrown26:
Like dis one in d pic,

This is one of the funniest thing I have ever seen. It's really shameful to be honest, the stark contrast between ignorantly sounding Idiocracy and then 360 turn to a beggar online is something worth studying.

ThatrealestApex:
Yeah bro, I am I was only banned from the thread for the mean time

Alright it's all good, at least there's sanity in the thread now. Now people can actually focus on their lives and weigh the option of coming on there to waste their time begging. You were really a fire starter, but it was for the greater good.

ThatrealestApex:
Too bad

All in the name of trying to search for greener pastures

May their Souls R.I.P

Hello friend, I remember you from that thread that they closed. Hope you good?

Ugaboy:
Tottenham, A team that is neither prepared to win the league or trophy 🏆 nor go to relegation... They are there to hurdle the big team and humiliate the minor.

This is one of the most funniest commentary I have seen. It's a fact tho 😁😁😁😁

JASONjnr:
Marriage is more than responsibilities...


Marriage is far from how you view and understand it.

Responsibilities is just a task. Marriage is a command from God.


I didn't understand marriage untill I planted a tomato at the backyard and I was always going every morning to observe and check for changes an watering it.

My friend thought it was all about watering it. But in real sense, it used to bring joy to me seeing that I was able to grow something and it was wonderful...

Need I say that I was stocking alot of it on the fridge and dashed some out? Later I also included pepper to the family and with eggs at home, I was always sure of a good breakfast....

The beautiful seeds the produced.



Like I said earlier....

Marriage isn't a responsibility.... If you're poor and stingy, you'll always have this mentality.

If you're not, you will enjoy its beauty!

You live in fantansy land, for a place like Nigeria I can say I have resided here long enough to conclude marriage definition here is all about bills. The populace is significantly poor due to terrible minimum wage and bad welfare, which is no existence. Couple that with poor infrastructure and security, marriage can only be equated to more like financial transaction. I have helped lots of couples who are friends with my wife and I have seen many marriages always on the verge due to lack of financial stability. So author the thread is absolutely correct.

Miracood2:
Why Una ban giveaways?

I guess reasonable guys like you end up been the collateral damage in a conflict. I am guessing the one rule for all is fair because it keeps the roaches and vermin away. It brings sanity and true reflection on ones action and purpose in life. Time is the one determinant of everyone's action, it makes real time assessment on how ones actions now will translate to something tangible in the future. Don't worry to much about the insignificant things because you never know the big rewards that lay ahead.

TheMaterialist:
This is a very grave matter.

I guess it is, at least it's a preview to lots of people into service. Most soldiers come out without any form of counselling to remodel their mind back to society. It's the reason why Nigerians need to support their armed forces regardless of the political undertone. It goes a long way in soothing the effects and reducing the negative effects of war. Anyways my take from the conversation is the surgeon angle, never really quantified their work on same magnitude.

TheMaterialist:
There are certain professions which require you
to be detached and unemotional to do your job
properly, being a soldier is one of them.


Another proffession that requires this temperament is Surgery.

Imagine a Man or Woman whose job deals with
them cutting people open, operating on their
internal organs, knowing fulling well that you
hold someone's life in your hands, the slightest
error could lead to medical complications or
death, such a person does his or her job best
when they are cold, rational and don't allow
their emotions to distract them.


So yes, some proffessions really require people
to be detached and unemotional in order to
give high performance in that particular field

Therefore i should accept that I have been broken and remodeled to serve a purpose. And outside that purpose there will also be some sought of short circuits in my mind that will want me to act as if am still in a line of duty. Reason am communicating all these, I nearly hurt someone as a form of self defense. He was aggressive towards me and I went for his jugular by reflex, it was matter of second I talked myself out by instinct and I felt very sad because I would have hurt him really bad. Thus the reason I keep no friends and keep to myself, even my wife who is Nigerian senses that I sought of prefer spending time away.

TheMaterialist:
It it actually a good trait, for example if you are
the military commander you might have to
take rational and cool headed decisions especially
when you are under pressure.

Because making rash decisions may affect your
comrades.

So yes, it is a good trait to have if you are working
within the military.

Well you could say that in as much to an extent I feel the entire experience breaks you and remolds you. Sometimes I feel empathy is a serious weakness, my first wife I divorced because she was interfering with my job and had Little or no room in understanding the multiple facets of role in the army. Never been diagnosed with PTSD, still under medical examination as to how and why I don't have the primary indicators. Sometimes I believe actions should be taken on people with the potential to destroy despite the probability that they might have a slight chance of been rational. Does all these add up to someone with emotionally balanced?