₦airaland Forum

ogbonti:
THE BOLDED SECTION OF YOUR COMMENT shows you have a little knowledge of what you are discussing about. let me school you a bit

Do you know that IF, I REPEAT, IF not for the money flowing from overseas to nigeria to support impoverished family members, and IF not that awon boys traveled abroad to hussle, places like benin, by now would have been ungovernable and unlivable due to excess crime rate. Diaspora MONEY coming in is one of the few reasons there is not yet a civil war in southern Nigeria so keep quiet and dont tell me "DEM FORCE YOU TO TRAVEL" are you out of your mind? if ALL THE MEN YOU DEMONIZE HERE come home to naija to act properly according to your script, and they get hit by recession and cant even feed, those wives will leave them and both diaspora husband and home based wife share the loss. what are you talking about? Probably, the gadget u used in recording these insults, phones or ipads was sent to you by a naija intending husband who lives in America. PLEASE DO US A FAVOR, stop accepting our gift and recession relief we send you via western union. stop dressing in our cloths, using our make ups to intimidate the jobless boys who service your congos

decently refuse outr money and go get a job, raise your head up high and be a lady of your words, in 3 months, you will look like a refugee from somalia... your waistline is growing wider and wider eating fast foods everyday with out dollars and pounds and you have the nerve to go online to bite the fingers that feed you... I NO BLAME YOU!

Typical of you to assume your meagre income can take care of me

I didn't create this thread to exchange words so I'd let this go

justwise:
[/b]

There is some element of truth in what you said but you got no clue as to why some people decided to come home to marry or why marriages breakdown here.

Certian circumstances prevent many Nigerians bringing their wives here...visa restrictions being one of them, you can't just start blasting them when you got no clue what the issues are

I blasted the men, the white women and also our Nigerian women I know how these things are all I am saying is some of them can be avoided

You marry a woman here make provisions for her
You marry a white lady divorce her properly before you come home to marry
Don't use women for breeding sake and then abandon them to suffer
Sometimes you go and don't come back for years, sometimes they send nothing back home
See before I started writing I have witnessed first hand something like this and recently witnessed another some days back
So I do have an inkling of what I'm talking/writing about

justwise:
[/b]

Then narrow your argument. Yes I watched the video and that lady is far too clueless for 2016

Oh there's nothing clueless about me honey

I am an unquenchable fire

You can't deny there's more than an essence of truth in what I have said

justwise:
This is just careless generalisation

No it is not, from the comments so far we all can see it's a common practice

justwise:
Great! So how do you know that Nigerian men coming home to marry are not doing it for love? It's good for a Nigerian girl to marry a white man but it's not good for a Nigerian man to come home to marry?

It's either you didn't read the whole content or didn't watch the video

I have no problem with the genuine ones I don't

I have a problem with the ones who abandon their wives and children here and barely come back home

ogbonti:
this whole talk by bella is bulls. The gospel thruth is that the western world thrives on 2 things.... (1) pulling men down before women and (2) Mistrust.

1. pulling men down before women is UN-AFRICAN. Men are a little more valuable than robots, with their rights coming third behind women (First) Domesticated Animals (second) then Men (third) in that Order. If you dispute the pets having more rights than men in the Western world, go ask Michael Vicks of Philadelphia Eagles who was jailed for dog fighting

2. Mistrust, the USA for instance promotes mistrust due to overbearing capitalism. Every man is watching over his dollar and the easiest way to mess with your money is having an unvetted olosho coming to ruin your life becasue of relationships or marriage.

the marriage laws in western world is overprotective of women hence most men are just into nacking congos and moving on. If i tell you the number of single "jaw dropping" beautiful women in my city, here in the USA, who have great jobs and living so well materially but no stable relationship or being married, you will scream until your throat dried up of saliva.

SO WHAT IS THE PROBLEM?

I hope bela is listening? An African taking out of his natural environment is like fish out of water ... most of us live well materially each day in the west, but we are in sorrow as we are not living the life we intend to live, life of morals of a nuclear family, with father, mother and kids being brought up with love and respect and strict discipline. Bela, don't crucify your African brothers. many are still in the immigration system. some come home with paroles, not permanent resident cards so, if they wait until they get permanent resident card, they may clock 70 easily

Do you know I have a family member who is 65, he came to the USA since age 25, he got married at 28 to a black american woman and they have 4 kids... eldest of the kids is 34, last born is 25, none of them have visited Nigeria and they do not hope to ever come. THINK ABOUT THE AGONY THIS MAN FACES EACH TIME HE VISITS HOME.. he is like a bachelor.

so, before you talk rubbish about our men, make sure you have actually lived in our circumstances or situations. You think say to get paper na moi moi for jand? mot guys will love to come home, marry their childhood love and settle well abroad, but paper wahala 90% of the time is the yawa... watch AWILO song, le problem de papier... and u will understand. I REST MY CASE!

Where you forced to go there? No

My point is if you're gonna come home to Marry please always come back to check on your wives and kids

I understand the hustle really I do but using others to satisfy ourselves isn't that going too far, you have one wife abroad another home some of their kids don't even know what their fathers look like and their wives here have become like single mothers

If you wanna come home to marry please make provisions for the intended wife and children

Cutehector:
Bella is going places....




Yikes......

justwise:
@Talk2Bella

Do you also have issues with Nigerian girls living in Nigeria who married oyibo they met online? What happen to Nigerian men living in Nigeria?

No I don't have a problem with that, that's the essence of this post, you lay where you make your he'd

As long as it's outta genuine love go ahead, you don't date a white man and when it's time to marry you remember you have African men back home to settle down with

NgcoboP:
zowie please find another cure for your love less existence.... am off... the beauty awaits. zowie once again.. the man will come 43 is not too old

I am in an awesome mood

So glad others are seeing my point

Missolivea:
Does it mean that all of you guys supporting this attitude will do the same thing if in their shoes and you don't mind hurting the feelings of that Nigerian lady who will live a marriage of your perpwt and constant absenteeism. And that oyinbo chick you tie down for years deceiving and manipulating her

They would rather ask me if I have been in the states

A woman close to me almost died during child birth recently the only time her husband comes home is to impregnate her, one night she was in labor no one to take her to the hospital no husband no nothing she was in so much pain till morning, she crawled outside screaming before people saw and helped her to the hospital they called her husband he said its not the time of the year for him to come see her

NgcoboP:
she's an extremely ignorant Arrow

Arrows when shot have direction, do you?

NgcoboP:
definitely not worth marrying

According to

NgcoboP:
shut up

Is that even possible

redcliff:
You sound too ignorant madame

Thanks

Bollinger:
You are funny. You think if the societal structure in Nigeria was normal the divorce rate wouldn't be ten times higher than what exists in America? No one wants to be treated like slaves and Nigerian woman are basically treated as such. The reason they are afraid to leave their husbands in Nigeria is because of the economic and legal realities that exist in the country. Both factors do not favor them. They know how difficult it would be to survive without the surpport of their husband especially when kids are involved. To make matters worse, the legal system does not favor them. A man can wake up one morning and chase his wife out of their matrimonial home and bring in someone else that same day and nothing will happen. Come and try that shiit over here. The reason the divorce rate in Nigeria is so low is because of fear on the part of women. It is that simple.

OBTSubtle:
Father remember me.. I'm single

Hahahahahaha

Amen

Bros why you de hide ya face na

ngmgeek:
You asked a question and got an answer, so stop using that word ok.

OK

It's a banter between friends tho

KissChris:
Talk2Bella and Fp these days......



Abeg dash Me that meme

Lemmme

Lemme nor talk

Xiadnat:
Sister Bella, how you dey? . God bless your hustle oo, I see you working it....holler.

Anyhoooo,

I dont really think this is a nigerian thing. I think you see this a lot in non-western folks who live abroad.

When I was in college, I had and lived with lots of folks from India, China/taiwan/hongkong and middle eastern countries who would rather seek for mate in their own country of origin than marry a westerner.

It's just an individual thing. I am not sure there is a rhyme or reason (that makes sense) to it.

Yea I noticed it with the Asians and Indians too but we gotta admit naija own too much fa haba

Ore mi I de fine u nko

ItsQuinn:
Bella I'm speaking from experience so i know what I'm talking about .....Ive met a lot of Nigerian girls over there and their attitude stink like rotten fish, thats why i would rather hangout with white girls than black girls

I see

tosyne2much:
OP, what are your statiscal evidence to back up your generization? Should I say you're arguing based on what you have been told by friends or you're actually trying to boost the morale of your fellow local girls ?

I am not generalising I am asking the ones, which happens to be much more than the ones who don't what's their reasons.

Boost who's morale I am actually condemning girls who just jump at an abroad returnee who just wants to marry her and leave her back home.

ItsQuinn:
Maybe because their attitude stinks, Nigerian girls over there are the worst

How do their attitudes stink? you don't know them, they don't know you? Do you know how Nigerian men treat them over there? Do you know some of those men actually use them to satisfy their greed and come home to tell bad stories about them, don't assume and generalise we have to look at it from both angles

SerRento:
The Nigerian sisters have already assimilated the prevalent culture in their new society, that's why they aren't tops in the list of women to be married. Before a Naijabet man will marry a Nigerian woman abroad who's living like oyibo, he will like marry oyibo na. Abi how you see am? Why buy fake when I can have the genuine article?

How's the one home any better?

SerRento:
The dating and family culture in the western world is quite antithetical to ours here in Nigeria. The man is/was the unmistakable head of the relationship and household. Over there, they do "equality tinz", which doesn't sit well with the average African man. Hence, why our brothers think coming back to familiar terrain to pick a wife is ideal.

Alas, our Nigerian girls have become more scandalous than the Kardashians, foolishly copying but, unfortunately, not understanding how to handle these freedoms the west promises and presents.

You might laugh at these Nigerian men coming back home to marry, bit know this, even oyibo men are increasingly refusing to marry oyibo women. You don't have to believe me, Google is your friend. Google "mgtow", that should lead you to interesting discoveries.

If I was those guys, I frankly don't know what I would do, I'd maybe move back to Nigeria and marry here. I cannot live in obodo oyibo, before one woman will divorce me and kick me out of my house and I will still be paying the mortgage. Tufiakwa. I reject evil in my life.

Thank you.

What about our Nigerian sisters there? Are they not marriageable? Why do they come back marry and don't come back for years?

Cutehector:
lol the divorce rate in the west is currently pegged at 52percent, so yes I can say they have seen into the future.

I still maintain its a load of horseshi***t

Cutehector:
well to them it ain't bullshittt.



No man wants a broken marriage.. so why marry someone dat will eventually want to divorce?

And they have seen into the future yea

Cutehector:
Nigerian ladies out there would want to take advantage of the divorce entitlements. Since it favors the women over there.

Bullsh****t

alterswerve:
Why are Nigerian women exited when someone who has travelled abroad or lives abroad wants their hand in marriage.. or rather.. child bearing..?

good question

Cutehector:
Lol same question I used to ask but when a Nigerian guy abroad opened my eyes and told me the reason why, I supported the trend

what were his reasons?