₦airaland Forum

veekid:
ok, thanks for this, can I get it on jumia or anywhere?

Just go and buy LONTOR rechargeable fan, that's the best you can get. Mine is about 1.5 years old but still lasts 8 hours.

ReneeNuttall:
Is it ur mind or ur thinking spirit?Is it ur phone and data I used in typing that? I guess ur answer is no.oya goan sleep.

Okay ma

ReneeNuttall:
I hope he doesn't lure them into sodomy with his dancing skills? If the answer is no,then he will definitely win the hearts of not just the students in his class but the entire sch.

Should Sodomy be the first thing that comes to mind?

Who give Jagaban this kind cap?

Nicklaus619:
It was 1st April, 2003 time check 5:45 am, I was sleepless cos I and my siblings was busy watching one season movie throughout the night, I was seated jeje o, before the devil ministered to my ears and the devil said
"nick prank ya dad" I dismissed the idea because that man flogging and punishment is iconic, but another voice says what da heck have fun u ain't got nothin to loss, my brethren worst idea ever.
I banged at my dads door and screamed
"Dad ya car is on fir" before I could Finish shouting, my dad slammed the door in my face and ran like a wild cheetah, I have never seen him so fast like that before, I meet him outside with fire extinguisher cheering out his legendary Volvo, he came close to me and said nick where is the fire??
Before I could finish shouting April fool, he gave me a sucker punch, sending my whole body and spirit to the ground
My brethren that was the last tin I remembered, I woke up on 3rd April, 2003 with our reverend father, prayer warriors and my parent and siblings praying and sweating beside me on the hospital bed , it wasn't funny at all, my dad embraced me and promised never to beat me again, as my mother yelled at him
Since then brethren I stopped doing people April fool

Hahahahahah, This was damn funny

Something similar made my dad stop beating me, only that I faked mine.

Horlhamhi:
@themonk, that got me really laughing out loud..
By the way, you'll be good at story write-ups.

Thanks dear, Happy new month.

MiaB:
someone owing me told me to send account number this morning only to type April fool

Na this kind April fool dey cause fight o

Shibaraba:
I dey come

Share your experience jare, lalasticlala how far?

This happened about 5 years ago, I pranked a friend of mine by calling him very early in the morning around 7:00am and asking him to come to a popular junction that my new car is parked there. He just hurriedly dressed up and rushed down to the junction to meet with me, congratulate and bill me on acquiring my new car. The following conversation ensued:

Friend: Hello boss where you and the car dey?

Me: You no dey see? Check out the car wey shine pass for this junction na, if to say you get eye you suppose don see my ride.

Friend: This your car don dey shark you like ogogoro, e get one sharp Camry wey dey by my left na you be that abi

Me: Fool, Common come here.

Friend: Idiat, I dey come.

Me: Better rush before I leave you comot.



He hurriedly walked towards the car and noticed nobody was inside so he called me back



Friend: E be like say no be the same car we dey talk o, nobody dey inside this one.

Me: Which side you go after you comot that aboki street?

Friend: Left na

Me: I tell you say you no get sense, everyday na left left you dey go. Come back I dey your right.

Friend: I go collect all these insult because I must bill you this morning, if you no drop something this morning I go damage your bumper.

Me: No waste my time o, I gats go buy fuel.

Friend: I don dey come, chill out bro.



He walked towards the other side of the street he came out from and sighted a benz



Friend: Bro you no tell me say na Benz, your name now na Benzema.

Me: you think say I come play? All these work I dey work for Mobil you think say na charity?

Friend: Bro calm down, Na just one car you buy o, you don dey talk like say you be one kind billionaire.

Me: Ogbeni no waste my time, I go sound you o, make I even play some music sef.



I put one Dbanj's song and slowly increased the volume



Friend: Bad guy, this car go sha hear am before 3 months. You wey even your teeth and leg na second hand value them get.

Me: Hahahahaha, dey come. Idiat.

Friend: E remain small, you suppose don see me by now.

Me: I don see you, you dey always Waka like fool.

Friend: All these insult wey I dey collect na because of the billing I wan bill you o

Me: Come jare make I help your life.



At this point He could clearly see nobody was in the benz





Friend: Ogbeni why your car dey empty?

Me: I dey back seat, Na you go drive.

Friend: You don wreck the car already abi you don forget how to drive

Me: No waste my time, I dey try set date for my watch, wetin be today's date again?

Friend: Fool, you no dey ever remember date. Yesterday na 31st of March today na April 1st

Me: Hahahhaha, I no dey everly remember date but I sha remember today own.

Friend: Wetin you smoke, No be me just remind you?

Me: You go soon know who remind who

Friend: Oh Oh Oh, you done prank me. This car dey empty, today na April Fool. You Bastarrrrrr...



I hung up the call and didn't pick up after several dialing attempts by my friend throughout the day



That how I pranked someone, share your experiences.

chloride6:
Cash and cash equivalents but hey what do you know?

Oga stop talking about what you have no knowledge about, cash equivalent is not the same as cash, anything that can be converted from or to cash can be a cash equivalent but cash is cash and cannot be stored electronically.

Old story, October 10, 2018

chloride6:
Aside from buildings and cars;

The rest of a banks assets are in cash, stocks, bonds and t bills which are stored electronically.

Cash is stored electronically

You might be the dumbest person I've met on nairaland.

She couldn't even give the poor child a proper burial.

Maximatic:
Ofrodoma

I'm actually interested but I'll hit you up next week.

Maximatic:
Energize your Future

Future

Hello guys,

How much should be budgeted for the best solar system to power

1.5 hp AC
42" Television
A Fridge
About 4 light bulbs
A few other appliances like laptops, phones, music sytem etc?

Thanks in anticipation of your input.

slick1:
::
Until people realise there is nothing special about being a Celebrity, they will keep falling for the trick like this businessman who has turned into a cry baby.

Listen everybody, " Celebrities are hustlers like you and I. Sometimes their hustle dey pay and sometimes it doesn't."

So they can go broke and owe also. So don't be expecting them to go about with 'Tati Billion' in their pockets everytime. When them owe too much them go take off again to another club again and owe also. If every club owner that gives credits call out their debtors, you guys will be surprised at how it will be the same set of people.

You are stating the obvious, who doesn't know celebrities are humans and hustler too?

meobizy:
I consider this a silent protest.
I can not kill myself in a forum where error 502 runs rampant.
I can not kill myself in a forum where comments are deleted without warning nor reason.
I can not kill myself in a forum where the ‘mail mods’ button is created as an unused formality.
Most times clicking the button is no different from doing nothing.
I can not kill myself in a forum where this topic may get deleted because someone in authority caught sweety while reading it.

I am going to sign up in another forum and won’t comment here until I reach the 3,000 post mark there.
I do not know how long it will take and I do not care.
This place don tire me.
I will still come around and read news and comments.
I will like and share those I enjoyed.
I will however not contribute to any discussion in any shape or form till I reach my target.
I thought of deactivating this account but pushed aside the idea.
I guess I’ve gotten fond of this platform to a certain extent.

Seun lalasticlala Mynd44 take note

Two brothers battling it out

Getintouch2004:
Rubbish!

Thunder will fire any mod that would release this post to FP

Just wait


Modified: I told you so

There was a pastor that prophesied that Ugwuanyi would struggle to be reelected. Hope he is in shame now.

It would have been bad if he left the party that made him a senator.

Na this move break one of my friend back.

Freethesis:
Can someone explain why this medical condition ONLY HAPPEN TO MARRIED WOMEN

Because of bloggers, just to let you know most of the news you read in Nigeria is fake. Bloggers would add things you want to be true to make you want to read it more.

Mr Ubah, I hope this isn't true.

Imagine as a Nigerian you were going to Tanzania only to find yourself in California, then the air hostess is telling you guys to wait for another flight back to Tanzania.

How will you escape

Kingwizzy16:
Insurance cover him

Insurance covers stupidity?

tohyorsih:
i swear that comment shock me

how can you say Otedola is richer than Michael Jackson?

Most of you are super daft, Michael Jackson has never been a billionaire, do you know what is earnings against networth. Fairfora is here deceiving you are you can't even use Google to verify his claims. How does earnings translate to networth? Don't be an idiot in your next life.

Now look at the list of the richest musicians of all time, Michael Jackson is No. 10 at $350M. So much for being a billionaire. At your age you and fairfora can't tell the difference between earnings and Networth and you are on Nairaland publicizing your stupidity

https://www.businessinsider.com/the-richest-musicians-of-all-time-2013-1?IR=T

fairfora:
stop insulting yourself. Both earnings and net worth are used as criteria in ratings. In the picture you saw, both earnings and net worth were quoted there. Your earnings-taxes and other decidtions is your net worth. How much is otedola's net worth as at today compared to jacksons in his reigning days? Forbes would help you further

I wish I could help you but I can't.
They explicitly stated that this is his earnings, where did they say it is his networth?

I have previously shown you how to calculate networth but it seems you don't care, you want to pull out figures from the air. I want you to Google the revenue of Forte oil for just one year and see how stupid you are. GTFOH

fairfora:
who ever said revenue was same as net worth? Mention it in my comment where I said that. The bone of contention here is the fact that otedola current worth couldn't stand that of Jackson in his lifetime when he was still reigning before he got broke even after he went broke he was still a billionaire. Stop all these insults and accept you're not knowledgeable about what you're saying. If you need more clarification visit Forbes website. I've helped enough , haven't I?

So why are you using revenue figures when you can just google his networth.

Tell me if they combine all the money you've made all your life including the ones you've spent will that be your networth?