₦airaland Forum

And you expect me to read all these

i don already buy land for the city o

TALOSOBE,.. ONYENEKWU,.. WAIKEMAGANA..... I used two legs for the automatic car when i was still a learner......... @ i am no more a learner.......@ all this kpomo drivers which we see now adays breaking driving norms and causing diverse kinds of accidents

TALOSOBE,.. ONYENEKWU,.. WAIKEMAGANA..
...... Beware of the spirit of Bianca....... She wants compensation for marrying an old man

TALOSOBE,...ONYENEKWU,...WAIKEMAGANA..!!! All these our kpomo Mods, my post neva enta front page yet what is this doing here..@op, come my village, u aint seen any thing yet

TALOSOBE,...ONYENEKWU,...WAIKEMAGANA..!!!

dirtymoney: Top 10 Female rejection lines...
1. I think of you as a brother.
Translation: You give me the creeps.
2. There's a slight difference in our ages.
Translation: I may as well be dating my dad.
3. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way.
Translation: I don't want to be seen in public with a dork like you.
4. My life is too complicated right now.
Translation: I'm busy seeing other guys. Who are you again?
5. I've got a boyfriend.
Translation: I'd rather be with my male cat and a half gallon of Ben and Jerry's.
6. I don't date men where I work.
Translation: I wouldn't date you if you were in the same solar system, much less the same building.
7. It's not you, it's me.
Translation: It's you.
8. I'm concentrating on my career.
Translation: Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job
is better than dating you.
9. I'm saved, so my heart belongs to God.
Translation: I've sworn off men like you.
10. Let's be friends.
Translation: I want you to stay around so I can tell you in
excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and go out with. I appreciate the male perspective.

..


TALOSOBE,...ONYENEKWU,...WAIKEMAGANA..!!!

berem: It seems it has become a new trend for some men to request for their spouse to be to be pregnant fIrst before the proper marriage takes place.I have had the opportunity to ask about 20 yet to be married men and 15 of of them wants their wives to be to get pregnant first.I also asked them why they wanted it,I was shocked when they all said "I don't trust nigerian girls these days".
I have a cousin who is gonna be 34years by next year and she is not yet married.There is this guy she was introduced to for marriage but the man gave her condition that she must get pregnant first.My cousin being a very stubborn lady refused and said she will never get pregnant before marriage.Her mum has been worried because of her age and also being the first daughter.
My main worry now is that her mum wants me to advise her on what to do.Right now am confused.I don't know what kind of advice to give.Should I advise her to get pregnant or wait for the right time? Am really scared the guy might leave her if she refuses to get pregnant first.

TALOSOBE,...ONYENEKWU,...WAIKEMAGANA..!!!

the woman might know a lot of business and political secrets...... She might be paid to shut her ugly mouth

you can not teach me unless you knock my head - OP

congrat@ #blarr.......... Whats starts with a b and ends with an n?

0.5 mega pixel

watch out for the Thruge Master.....the Kpakanwanda 1 of the federation

where is the legacy of ojukwu today......which of the business is still alive......... He was indeed great. I had which his children could have continued from where he stopped

Jarus: For not being consulted before going public, I hereby tender my resignation as Nairaland Politics Section moderator.

Please delete my name from your list of moderators immediately.

Regards,

bye bye....i no go miss

Jarus: For not being consulted before going public, I hereby tender my resignation as Nairaland Politics Section moderator.

Please delete my name from your list of moderators immediately.

Regards,

bye bye....i know go miss u

if jarus resigns, about 10000 NLander are capable of replacing hi

By Ogaga Ifowodo

YOU wish to Allah the Merciful that what you heard about the request for an additional N9 billion for the construction of a brand new mansion for the Vice President is not true, that you had just woken up from a nightmare when you heard lying voices in the dark seeking to “heat up” your head and “the polity” (apologies to President Jonathan’s spokesmen).

Alas, it is true. When N7.5 billion was originally approved, in 2009, for the construction of the same house, you had dismissed, with a holy oath, the father of lies who had been whispering such damnable falsehood in your ear. You were as incredulous as Adeyemi Smart, a senator, would be three years later when Adamu Ismail, executive secretary of the Federal Capital Development Authority defended the act of naked plunder before the FCT senate committee, and you screamed at the fleeing Satan:

“Is this house to be built on earth or in heaven? Will the sand, cement, iron rods, tiles, doors and every other material needed for it be made of gold? Will the builders and labourers be paid in gold weights? Tuffia! Get thee behind me, Satan,” you railed and went about your business.

Yet, it was true then as it is now. Ismail did not once mention “gold” as he explained the scope of Project VP’s Mansion. The additional N9 billion, a 120 percent increase to the original approved sum, is needed to “build a banquet hall, protocol guest house, two other guest houses and civil infrastructure, as well as to purchase furniture and install security gadgets.”

Apparently, there had been an unforgivable, even criminal, neglect in the original plan and design of the mansion. But it goes without saying that without these additional amenities, the resultant edifice would be unfit for purpose and an insult to the office and person of the vice president. Which is why Ismail was quick to inform the senate that the “additional scope to be done on the project” (sic) was “because of the personality of Mr. Vice President.”


VICE-PRESIDENT Namadi Sambo

Got it? A mansion befitting of the Vice President’s personality. Got the bit about civil infrastructure too? According to Ismail, the Bureau of Public Procurement “approved over N6 billion” after vetting the request but that “would not be enough,” given that “there are some other adjustments needed to be done,” the details of which he would disclose at a later date and time. But why trouble him to justify what every fool knows?

Take only one befitting amenity, the banquet hall, which is to gulp N2.2 billion. As General Obasanjo, who should know, told us, high public service is an invitation to “come and chop.” Where is the best place to chop? A banquet hall, of course! And what should the tables, chairs, chinaware, cutlery and the very walls of the hall itself be made of if the chopping is to be worth its salt (pun intended)?

Why, gold! As for the food, let’s just say that it is not what every Mukoro, Musa or Moriamo, with no personality, eats in a Mama-Put or buka far from banquet halls.

There was one almost plausible justification for Project VP’s Mansion. Since 1999 when the great new epoch of democracy dawned on us, the vice president has been, to our shame, homeless. Former Vice President Atiku Abubakar squatted in the official residence of the Chief Justice throughout his tenure. Jonathan endured the added indignity of being relocated to Akinola Aguda House, the Presidential guest house, before blind luck elevated him to Aso Rock.

This unflattering image of a wandering,

homeless vice president of the oil-crazed Giant of Africa is what the government seeks to erase quickly before we become the laughing-stock of the world. Thankfully, we have petro-dollars to burn. What was it former military dictator General Yakubu Gowon is reputed to have said at the beginning of our oil-induced madness — that money is not our problem but how to spend it?

We have long solved that problem, with the cement armada that followed that utterance, appropriately enough, as a proof. So, let us build a N16 billion mansion to match the personality of our vice president. And let us remember to furnish it with furniture “bought from heaven,” as the bewildered Senator Adeyemi wondered aloud.

Only that after this, we must never again hear of government officials going to Germany, anywhere outside the borders of this rich country, for medical treatment. The president and all political office holders must be prohibited from sending their children to school abroad while they remain in office.

A country that can lavish so many billions on its vice president’s house is clearly not a beggar nation. Therefore, Jonathan must not attempt the inhuman act of levying another expropriation tax on citizens reeling from the monstrous blows of endemic joblessness and poverty by way of a further withdrawal of the bogus, so-called subsidy on refined oil products.

For just think what N16 billion could do to transform one of our teaching hospitals, making it unnecessary for Mrs. Jonathan to enrich Germany with the loads of hard currency she frittered away during her recent “vacation?” Or what that sum could do to rehabilitate primary schools across the country even if at a mere N500 million per state? Just think!

[color=#990000][/color]the car nah tokunbo

bunmioguns: thank you sir merry xmas

merry xmas also

bunmioguns: it's still not making us to laff. . .try harder

charcoal pot calling the kettle black......please stop bitching #bunmidog

bunmioguns: it's still not making us to laff. . .try harder

pot calling the kettle black......please stop bitching at bunmidog

wow bumi and ogun......#blarr#

dis post needs to go to the morgue section.....blarr

bunmioguns: Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?

Operator: Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!

Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to me. Who is this?

Caller: I'm Sam Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.

Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.


Operator: Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!


Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator: I'm Saw Ree.


Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

try harder...blarrrrrr.......>f

dis post needs to go to the morgue section.....blarr

bunmioguns: @OP.. . . Keep trying, I knw say one day u go make us laff for here

u get cata 4 ur brain abi

lack of love for the masses. If patience can be flown abroad, then why not sikura too

Jide was hungry and went to ‘mai shai’ (man selling tea and bread).The following
transpired between the man and the mai shai.
JIDE: u get loaf of bread?

ABOKI:yes

JIDE:bring one; slice am two and put 2 sachet of butter in btw the slice.
ABOK (happy and tankin God 4 bringing customer, was just doing as he is told)
JIDE:u get egg?

ABOKI:yes customer

JIDE:fry 20 egg put am btw the bread.

ABOKI:Okay customer

JIDE:u get sadin 4 inside gongoni?

ABOKI:yes customer everytin dey.

JIDE:put two gongoni inside the bread.

ABOKI:Okay customer (happy and doing as he is told, in his mind he wil make a lot of
money 2day)

JIDE:u don finish? Oya press the bread for me.

ABOKI:see am customer, i don prepare am finish.

JIDE: . . . . . OYA CUT TEN NAIRA OWN FOR ME.......

your honest opinion please, what will happen next?

If our health system is good why do our rulers and people in high places of governance travel out for medical checkup. The same rulers at budget presentation speech, will score the health sector very high yet they themselves do not have faith in it. If a prominent vip is sick, he or she must be rushed abroad. Is there really hope for the common man in Nigeria?