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Tolexander's Posts

Nairaland Forum › Tolexander's Profile › Tolexander's Posts

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Politics › Re: Buhari Breaks Fast With Ooni Ogunwusi And Other Traditional Rulers by Tolexander: 9:36pm On Jun 29, 2016
sarrki:
You surely need a factory reset of your whole system
sure!

If that is what it takes to liberate you from your affliction!
Politics › Re: Buhari Breaks Fast With Ooni Ogunwusi And Other Traditional Rulers by Tolexander: 9:30pm On Jun 29, 2016
When did Ooni come back?

Now in Abuja again!

He hasn't been staying in his palace as such
Politics › Re: Lagos Shuts Down 70 Churches, 20 Mosques Over Noise Pollution by Tolexander: 9:21pm On Jun 29, 2016
Very nice one.

So annoying seeing church with members not more than 20 which include the pastor's family up to a football team, using PAS(Public Address System) to disturb one's sleep all in the name of vigil. Without using PAS, they the pastor will still be audibly heard.
Politics › Re: PHOTOS: Pope's Representative,most Rev. Agustine Kassujja Visits Gov. Aregbesola by Tolexander: 9:10pm On Jun 29, 2016
idensko:
Every Sin can be forgiven
But d sins against d holy spirit will never be forgiven.


Even d Pharisees though dey were doing d ryt thing when dey condemned and killed Our lord Jesus Christ.


Shalom
What has your "good" contributed to the growth of humanity?

Furck off!
Politics › Re: Ben Bruce And His Family In Lovely Photo by Tolexander: 8:33pm On Jun 29, 2016
sarrki:
Is Ben bruce a senator ? I know understand ooo he has not move a motion always on the news
his legislative spatial entity and activity is on Twitter!

Mode of motion moving is by tweeting!
Politics › Re: Ben Bruce And His Family In Lovely Photo by Tolexander: 8:31pm On Jun 29, 2016
Nice family,

Not too much of a nuclear family, just a basketball team.
Politics › Re: 70 Churches And 20 Mosques Shut Down In Lagos.(see Reasons) by Tolexander: 8:27pm On Jun 29, 2016
Mynd44:
https://www.nairaland.com/3196210/lagos-shuts-down-70-churches
Mr moderator!

This link quoted is locked instead of this thread you post a link.
Politics › Re: PHOTOS: Pope's Representative,most Rev. Agustine Kassujja Visits Gov. Aregbesola by Tolexander: 8:16pm On Jun 29, 2016
temitemi1:
Rev visiting babalawohuh Good meet evil grin grin grin
evil meet evil!
Celebrities › Re: 2baba Releases Falz Throwback Photo... Check It Out by Tolexander: 5:07pm On Jun 29, 2016
Metamorphosis!
Christianity Etc › Re: Sex Between 12-3am Leads To Unanswered Prayers - Pastor by Tolexander: 5:03pm On Jun 29, 2016
Okijajuju1:
That na the time wey Ashawo for club dey reduce their price by 50%
yes o

quarter past 2
Owo illegal
Omo illegal
Christianity Etc › Re: Sex Between 12-3am Leads To Unanswered Prayers - Pastor by Tolexander: 4:53pm On Jun 29, 2016
He may be right!

Cos that seems to be the hours God does concentrate on baby formation between couples, he may not have time to answer any other prayer.
Celebrities › Re: Daddy Showkey Shares Epic Throwback Photo by Tolexander: 4:41pm On Jun 29, 2016
So dem no born am with the "Dada".

Daddy Showkey seems to very like his mama!

He seems to have got a smart phone, cos the rate he uploads on Instagram of recent ....
Politics › Re: Police Seal Venue For Modu Sheriff- Faction’s Edo Guber Primary by Tolexander: 4:14pm On Jun 29, 2016
youngest85:
is police d ryt agency to do dat?
ya

Alimodu Sheriff's faction is not recognized, hence no reason to hold any primary election.
Police agency is meant to halt any illegal process.
Agriculture › Re: Have You Ever Seen This Before ? by Tolexander: 4:11pm On Jun 29, 2016
Photoshop!
Sports › Re: 50 Random Football Facts You Probably Never Knew by Tolexander: 4:02pm On Jun 29, 2016
Nice!
Christianity Etc › Re: Bishop Daniel Obinim Prays For Joysticks Of Members (Video) by Tolexander: 3:45pm On Jun 29, 2016
Video: Ghanaian pastor lays hands on his male members eggplants as he prays for them to have bigger p!**s
So enlarging pen¡s, increasing the yansh and bobby by touching them is the pastor's prophetic calling?

Or he is trying to satisfy his sexual thirst by touching them.
Christianity Etc › Re: PHOTO: A Nigerian Pastor Is Reportedly Selling Bottles Of The 'blood Of Jesus' by Tolexander: 3:32pm On Jun 29, 2016
Well, there are many Jesuses!

No one can say which Jesus he is talking about since he never included Christ
Politics › Re: Court Sacks Sheriff As PDP Chairman by Tolexander: 2:01pm On Jun 29, 2016
PhockPhockMan:
I can feel your pain bro.
No pain, no gain!
Politics › Re: Ekiti Lawmakers Protest Against Harassment Of Fayose By FG by Tolexander: 1:43pm On Jun 29, 2016
SeverusSnape:
From Ekiti.
Thank God it is not Ekiti State
Politics › Re: Ekiti Lawmakers Protest Against Harassment Of Fayose By FG by Tolexander: 1:41pm On Jun 29, 2016
SeverusSnape:
Buhari has more responsibilities than Fayose. He's occupying a highly office than Fayose, As a mature man, Can't he ignore?... Well, He's a dullard.
That is just the way an elder deals with a recalcitrant junior!
Politics › Re: Ekiti Lawmakers Protest Against Harassment Of Fayose By FG by Tolexander: 1:31pm On Jun 29, 2016
SeverusSnape:
Of course, Most of his people are PDP supporters.
and you got that affirmation from where?
Politics › Re: Ekiti Lawmakers Protest Against Harassment Of Fayose By FG by Tolexander: 1:29pm On Jun 29, 2016
SeverusSnape:
So instead of trying to deliver the dividends of democracy (which I doubt he'll be able to) he promised, He is more concerned about fighting opposition members.

Talk about misplaced priorities and dullness.
same applies to Fayose!

Always attacking Buhari just as if that is his constitutional reason for being elected.
Politics › Re: Court Sacks Sheriff As PDP Chairman by Tolexander: 1:23pm On Jun 29, 2016
Appeal Court,

here we are!

Is this why Makarfi said the crisis will be resolved before next week?

I trust Alimodu Sheriff, e no go gree!
Politics › Re: Ekiti Lawmakers Protest Against Harassment Of Fayose By FG by Tolexander: 1:20pm On Jun 29, 2016
SeverusSnape:
It's heartwarming to know that Fayose has the support of most of his people.
who are most of his people?

These people you see protesting are his party members!
Politics › Re: Ekiti Lawmakers Protest Against Harassment Of Fayose By FG by Tolexander: 1:19pm On Jun 29, 2016
cktheluckyman:
Funny enough. This are the only people who can remove Fayose from office, the EFCC and Buhari can't
What about creating tension in the state and declaring state of emergency to remove him?

I guess that is the motive!
Celebrities › Re: Missing Adamawa Musician, Found Unconscious by Tolexander: 1:07pm On Jun 29, 2016
Popular Adamawa-based musician, Ado Daukaka, who went missing on Saturday June 25th after he released his controversial new song titled “Gyara kayanka” condemning some politicians in the state, has been found unconscious.
typical of this Yoruba saying;

"Aje ke lana, omo ku leni"
(the witch cried yesterday and the child died today)

Fallacy of false cause
Celebrities › Re: ADAKU, Lolo 1 Steps Out Looking Gorgeous by Tolexander: 12:54pm On Jun 29, 2016
toba400:
lovely
what is lovely in the picture of a lady whose belly is trying to outshine the b00bs?
Politics › Re: Opinion: Which Institution In Nigeria Is Most Rotted? by Tolexander: 12:41pm On Jun 29, 2016
Higher Institution!
Politics › Re: Photos: Ibb's Grand Daughter Wins An Award At Her Primary School by Tolexander: 12:31pm On Jun 29, 2016
best student in fine art?
Award na award anyway!
Politics › Re: Court Dismisses Femi Fani-kayode Case Against FG by Tolexander: 12:29pm On Jun 29, 2016
Continue to RIP (Rest in Prison) FFK!
Politics › Re: Oyo Assembly Approves N14.2bn FG Bailout For Salaries by Tolexander: 12:21pm On Jun 29, 2016
Bailout that won't be fully used for its purpose to pay the workers' salary.
Sports › Re: Exactly Today 6years Ago, Aiyegbeni Did This To Nigerians (photo) by Tolexander: 12:03pm On Jun 29, 2016
The match, Nigeria vs South Korea was actually played on 22-06-2010.

I can recollect this very funny thread on Nairaland then.


www.nairaland.com/467458/yakubu-new-word-added-oxford
canuck:
[b]YAKUBU (Ya-ku-bu)
v. Ya*ku*bu, Ya*ku*bu*ed, Ya*ku*bus

1. To utterly squander once-in-a-lifetime opportunities, especially one that will cause pain to/mourning among millions of people

2. To mistake a platter of gold for a potty, and to go ahead and defecate all over it, while millions watch in distress, dread and disbelief

3. To be presented with an open door of success and to woefully fail to step in (Please see actual photo of this historically disappointing event)

4. To lack the zest, fervor, and drive to complete the easiest of tasks

5. To fail awfully at a very easy and uncomplicated assignment

(Etymology: Derived from Yakubu Aiyegbeni’s horribly missed opportunities during Nigeria’s lackluster performance against South Korea at the 2010 Soccer World Cup)

Usage:

"Mrs. Marriage Counselor, I am terribly pained! It was our wedding night! I was ready. . .But. . . But. . .He didn’t know what to do! I tried to help, but he Yakubu’ed!”

"All she needed to do was show up and the get the job that was waiting for her – Guess what? She Yakubu’ed the opportunity.”

Prayer: "Father, may I not Yakubu any door You open in my life in Jesus name!"

Example of the pain/mourning referenced in #1 above: “Yakubu! My unborn child won't forgive him” (Source: Acidosis)

Synonyms:

1. Waste foolishly
2. Fritter away
3. Dissipate casually
4. Lose effortlessly
5. Waste pipe (Source: chi-baby's papa!)


OTHER MEANINGS AND DERIVATIVES

YAKUBUOLOGY (Ya-ku-bu-o-lo-gy)
n. Ya*ku*bu*o*lo*gy


A situation where family demons travel long distance (no visa required) with a person, wait for that individual’s moment of glory, and strike that person with a persistent lack of common sense.
Usage: “That man Yakubus from time to time. That’s why nothing works for him!”


YAKUBU (Ya-ku-bu)
n. Ya*ku*bu, Ya*ku*bu*ed, Ya*ku*bus


Sociology: A situation where the ghastly performance of ONE individual triggers large-scale cases of hypertension, screaming, collasping, sighing, and sometimes, extended periods of loss of appetite among OTHER people in the society. Please note: The perpetuator remains perfectly healthy.


YAKUBU (Ya-ku-bu)
n. Ya*ku*bu, Ya*ku*bu*ed, Ya*ku*bus


When an individual or organization capitulates or fails to perform the least of its expected duties
Usage: "I'm pissed the bank is Yakubued; how am I supposed to get some money now?!"
(Source: OgidiBoy)


YAKUBOO (Ya-ku-boo)
n. v. interj. v.intr. Ya*ku*boo, Ya*ku*boo*ed, Ya*ku*booes


A deep-throated sounding expression of disdain, derision, or disrespect communicating instant disapproval of lackluster performance.
Usage: "Twenty minutes into the Super Chickens' poor performance, the deafening sound of 'Yabukuboo!' rented the air!!!"
(Source: btlasisi)


FATKUBU (Fat-ku-bu)
n. v. interj. v.intr. Fat*ku*bu, Fat*ku*bu*ed, Fat*ku*bues


To be so grossly overweight (usually between 40-60 lbs over) that the execution of simple tasks become herculean, arduous or strenuous.
Usage: "Doctor, help! I am so FATKUBU that I ran out of breath just shaking hands with you!!!"
(Source: Mcaudrey)



OTHER USES

"Afolabi is a Yakubu waiting to happen! Etuhu, Shittu, Ayila? All of them are Yakubus waiting to happen. Tragic!"
(Source: nearest)


_____________________________________________________________________

NOTE: Watch this space - This new word will be updated based on hilarious and thought-provoking contributions from NL in the service of all English-speaking countries!

Abeg, nor Yakubu this opportunity o!

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