₦airaland Forum

Its etiquette, on anything that is not an official document, that is something social the women's name should always go first, whether it be a wedding invite , a birthday party invitation or an announcement in the newspaper. However if it is a legal document, say a mortgage or loan agreement the mans name will always go first.

It just anglo etiquette which we have 'inherited' form Britain.

Happens all the time in Scotland (where I live) & (Ireland, where my father is from) were traditionally the most 'important' families name will be taken.

i.e. A man named McLaughton marrying a women from the Gunn clan would have been expected to and would have wanted to take on the more wealth and powerful clan name .There by giving his children a better start in life. Has to be said though that this is not the reason it goes on now but it is the background.

Quite common now for a young married couple to take on a totally new family name.

If a man marries a women with no brothers and he (the man) has many I think it is a pure act of love to take on her family name so that the family name lives on and does not die. Although I think that it would be very hard for a man to do so in Nigeria, as we are not an open minded nation.

is their Lagos better than ours?

men head of the family?

not in my house and not in my parents house, this kind of backward and frankly ignorant opinion is why my mother married a non Nigerian and why she wept for 3 days when i announced i was going to marry a Nigerian.

@ Mikun- so who pray tell is the head of me? I was widowed young and left with two small children, my parents live in another country so who is my boss? i think right now i am the boss ,i earn an excellent wage ,i live in a beautiful home, my children are angels and i am (despite previous tragedy) very happy. My husband was a wonderful man that never made me feel like a second class citizen in our home and any man that believes having a wife that totally submits to him makes him a good husband is not worth the effort.


this is an old argument and to be honest a boring one because no one on this forum can seem to have a discussion without quoting the bible! .

@Nadine20 -peace

@jayvinnie -well said

I am a keen scuba diver and spend most of the summer in a bikini ,but when i come to Nigeria to visit my mums family i would not dream of it, i think my aunts and uncles would be shocked.

Nigerian men are SO controlling it still shocks me when i hear the mind games they are playing with my girlfriends. Also Nigerian men gossip more than any other men i have met, they gossip like old ladies!

My late husband was Nigerian but i married him because he was such an amazing person, not because of his nationality. My own dear Nigerian grandfather tried to control me and all the women in the family (although it never worked with me) his behavior and that of other men in my Nigerian family made me very wary of Nigerian men.

I would date a Nigerian guy again but i would go into it with my eyes wide open a bale at the first sign of a controlling nature.

i am having a relationship with the man, the woman has made me no promises. So it would be he that felt my wrath ,but as soon as someone cheats on you they become worthless in my eyes so i think i would shrug my shoulder and walk away nither of them are worth my tears.

The age of consent differs greatly through out the USA for example:

Alabama, 16
Alaska , 16
Colorado, 15
Connecticut 16
Illinois, 17
New York , 17
North Dakota 18
Virginia ,18

the confusion arises as 21 was the age in some states until recently

and the age of consent is 13 in Nigeria, which i personally feel is a disgrace.

@ sweetnini- i do not want to offend you as i do not know your marital situation or age ,but could it have been an early miscarage? that is not normal to come on so heavy when it has never happened before.

very similar to retro my daddy is a doctor and thought the lies people tell their children are damaging.

my daughter is 8 and i believe if she is old enough to ask she is old enough to be told, as yet she has not asked.