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Wittymalley's Posts

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Science/Technology / Re: Engr Ikwuji Victor Concept To Tackle Snake Attacks In Our Modern Toilet System by Wittymalley(m): 9:16am On Dec 01, 2021
This is a good idea. Have you thought about water leakage through the movable cover? How do you want to prevent that?

1 Like

Sports / Re: Super Falcons' Home Kit Voted Best Jersey Of 2019 Women’s World Cup by Wittymalley(m): 12:25pm On Jun 24, 2020
Na best kit we wan chop for world cup??

It's not worth celebrating. It's not even a brand made in Nigeria.

3 Likes

Family / Re: My Son Gives Me Joy by Wittymalley(m): 6:28am On May 23, 2020
God bless the boy. He'll continue to be a source of joy to your family.

3 Likes

Programming / Re: Learn Power Bi by Wittymalley(m): 5:51am On Jan 11, 2020
donproject:


What is Power Bi? A library or a language itself?

It is software made by Microsoft for Data analysis and reporting.
Programming / Learn Power Bi by Wittymalley(m): 11:31pm On Jan 07, 2020
Hi guys!

If you're pursuing a career in Data Analysis,enrol for this course tonight, it will stop being free tomorrow.

https://www.udemy.com/course/data-analytics-essentials-with-power-bi/?couponCode=2020NEW

I hope you found this information useful.
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: Top 5 Reasons Not To Apply For A Job by Wittymalley(m): 4:52pm On Jan 06, 2020
Topic should be reviewed to "Top 5 reasons you shouldn't apply for that job"

Op take note.
Education / Re: What Makes A Door Shake When Another Is Opened Or Closed? by Wittymalley(m): 12:02pm On Nov 13, 2019
It can be as a result of movement of breeze caused by convection.

Convection is the movement of warm air from the room to a cooler region.
Politics / Re: LASG To Build A Jetty At UNILAG Waterfront by Wittymalley(m): 7:51am On Oct 18, 2019
Good one

1 Like

Education / Re: UNN: 50-Year-Old Chimpanzee Dies In University Of Nigeria Nsukka Zoo by Wittymalley(m): 6:27pm On Oct 02, 2019
Rip Champ


Sorry!!! Chimp

1 Like 1 Share

Crime / Re: Fake Blind Woman-Beggar Arrested In Ekiti With 10-Year-Old Girl by Wittymalley(m): 9:05pm On Sep 22, 2019
I saw her at Ado-Ekiti once under fayose bridge with a little girl,

" Please, help my mummy"
Education / Re: How New Provost Of The College Of Education, Ikere Was Appointed by Wittymalley(m): 8:19am On Sep 14, 2019
Wetin dem dey carry Profs do for Ekiti.

Them too much.

9 Likes

TV/Movies / Re: Distance: A Short Film By A Nairalander (Video) by Wittymalley(m): 10:46am On Aug 19, 2019
That's a good one.



Pet lovers
Kindly spare a minute of your time to fill out this form. We want to know how we can get pet information to you more.

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The process won't take more than a minute. Thank you
Crime / Re: Jihadists kill four Nigerian soldiers in Mogula ambush by Wittymalley(m): 10:41am On Aug 19, 2019
May their souls RIP.

Pet lovers
Kindly spare a minute of your time to fill out this form. We want to know how we can get pet information to you more.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeCTP27PXJd45I1DpppkW4Birev_SveFQBo7uBtxrbUOwkCxA/viewform

The process won't take more than a minute. Thank you
Pets / Pet Lovers, Let's All Fill This Form About Pet Care. by Wittymalley(m): 8:01am On Aug 19, 2019
Hi there!
Kindly spare a minute of your time to fill out this form. We want to know how we can get pet information to you more.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeCTP27PXJd45I1DpppkW4Birev_SveFQBo7uBtxrbUOwkCxA/viewform

The process won't take more than a minute. Thank you.
Sports / Re: Neymar Willing To Take £13.7m Pay Cut In Order To Rejoin Barca by Wittymalley(m): 6:28am On Aug 16, 2019
For your reading pleasure, read about my experience with Nigerian local pundits.

https://www.nairaland.com/5360198/chronicles-nigerian-local-pundit#81266217
Sports / Re: Nigeria Defeats Congo 79-46 In Afrobasket. Will Face Mali In Semi Final. by Wittymalley(m): 6:24am On Aug 16, 2019
[/color]The tigresses are moving with fire�in their hearts.

For your reading pleasure, read about my experience with Nigerian local pundits.

https://www.nairaland.com/5360198/chronicles-nigerian-local-pundit#81266217[color=#990000]
Politics / Re: Sokoto, Enugu, Imo Govs Join Catholic Bishop Of Umuahia For "Iri Ji Mbaise Festi by Wittymalley(m): 6:23am On Aug 16, 2019
For your reading pleasure, read about my experience with Nigerian local pundits.

https://www.nairaland.com/5360198/chronicles-nigerian-local-pundit#81266217
Sports / Re: UEFA Super Cup: Liverpool Goalkeeper, VAR Accused Of Cheating In Penalty Kick by Wittymalley(m): 6:04am On Aug 15, 2019
Have you read this today? Start your day with something interesting.

https://www.nairaland.com/5360198/nigerian-local-punditry-1
Sports / The Chronicles of a Nigerian Local Pundit. by Wittymalley(m): 12:41am On Aug 15, 2019
“What should you expect from a dying team injected with 4 shots of Manchestercycline”. An elated Ochuko, who is a Manchester united fan asked his friend, as they stroll down the hill to watch the UEFA Super Cup.

The hall was half filled, as it was still 20 minutes before the kickoff. Ochuko sat in his reserved plastic seat. Everyone in the hall were expecting Ochuko to deliver his pre-match analysis to predict who’ll win the Cup.

Ochuko claims to be a football analyst back in the days before BBCEE folded up. He only worked at the gate of the station. He stood up and cleared his throat. The noisy hall soon became quiet immediately to listen to words of the “god”. He dribbled his audience to believe his “cock and bull” story after matching players of both team, the state of the pitch and how the Liverpool spectators will win the match for their club. “Chelsea has no chance”, he declared. The “god” had spoken, the villagers had taken sides with the “god” expect that rascal, Luku.

The poor first half display from Liverpool, after seeing Chelsea score a wonderful goal made the hall murmur at halftime. Luku hoped, Chelsea would win the Cup. He lighted his cigarette to calm his nerves.

2 minutes into the second half, Ochuko’s substitution remedy worked and the game was back on level. A finer display from Chelsea made Ochuko uneasy and prayed the second half ended that way. After Mane’s second goal in the extra time, Ochuko had already counted the bottles of beer he would receive for a job well-done. Jorginho’s well-taken penalty made Ochuko think about his beer gifts again. He had counted his chicks before they were hatched.

Every player scored their the penalty kicks except one. That one player had helped Ochuko retain his unbeaten punditry in the village.
When will Ochuko’s punditry fail him in the eyes of his followers?

Stay tuned for the next episodes.

You can drop your experience with these pundits too.

1 Share

Crime / Re: Salah Cow Refuses To Die, Attacks Two Men (Photos) by Wittymalley(m): 8:56pm On Aug 13, 2019
Kamoru was confused; “Oh! The cow refused to die”, he said to himself. In his bald head, he had thousands of thoughts crossing through his brain wires.

Still on his feet, the housewives yelled in unison “RUN”. Before the yelling could reach his occipital condyle because of the busy traffic, the aggrieved cow is already charging towards him with a forceful velocity.

Kamoru had one second to decide, if he’ll continue the Salah celebration in good standing. He turned his back sharply and took his first step. But the cow’s acceleration was greater, it caught up with him. And with a hit, we can all see Kamoru in the air still wielding his machete. He landed safely on his back with just a bruise.

He was grateful, the cow didn’t get the first bone of his lumbar cavity. Salah would have ended.

Passersby questioned Kamoru, why he chose a cow this year. Is Ram not the official Salah meat? One Nairalander asked.

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