₦airaland Forum

Chai!,,, sombdy help me ask him how much he was paid to do that!

algorithm: The guys holding his head would be like "Mikel pass ball you won't pass, run you won't run oya kuku bite Nah"

u just made my night!

Android make sence oooo! But until they make a data subscription for it I prefer BB !

pls guys is the airtel 1500 subscription still working on non BB devices?

my testimony goes like this....after graduating from sec skool in 2009 I stayed at home for almost two Yrs...got admission into the uni in 2011 with an incomplete o level.....to cut the story short last yr 2013 I wrote Waec nd got my complete papers.....

just in case....I commented!

1. Securing beds...in Economy Class! There's a game Nigerian passengers play whenever they're on-board a semi-full airplane - It's kind of similar to Musical Chairs...but without the music. Passengers snub the seats assigned to them and scout for a stretch of three to four empty seats before take-off. Handbags and other luggage items are strategically placed on empty seats in the hope for that Business Class experience - pathetic.

2. Making dramatic Nollywood scenes. Whoever said 'Rules are meant to be broken' must have been a Nigerian. We're pretty damn good at breaking rules...into smithereens, just for good measure. There was one woman sat at the front of economy class with her less-than-a-year-old baby. She put her baby down on the empty seat next to her when the seat belt light was off (not sure if that's proper in the first place but I'll let her off on that one). The moment the seat belt light was back on, however, one of the air hostesses called her to order and told her to strap her baby in place - RED ALERT! RED ALERT! MAY DAY! MAY DAY! You knew from the way the irritated mother turned her neck with that 'oh-no-you-didn't' expression all over her face that cabin pressure was under serious threat. Needless today she told the air hostess to mind her own business - ironically, that's what the air-hostess was trying to do in the first place...Safety of passengers...DUH! I can't remember if the thud I heard later on was due to turbulence or because the baby had rolled off the chair...

3. Taking pictures. You can imagine trying to enjoy a good book when suddenly the corner of your eye picks up the flash photography of some newbie whose obviously hell-bent on convincing everyone back in Nigeria that he/she indeed travel abroad. Newsflash! There may be people with photosensitive epilepsy on-board or nearby pilots wondering if there is a terrorist hijacking, with one unfortunate Nigerian who decided to break one simple rule 'DON'T MOVE!' (go figure!)

4. Farting. It's bad enough you left your assigned seat at the front and decided to come behind me and stretch yourself across four empty seats. Now you're so generous as to share your flatulence with me in small doses of ammonia-laced farts...not a one-off...periodic discharges which could catch choke me unawares if I dare yawn. FYI, avoid fizzy drinks on the plane if you know you can't handle your abdominal tract like few pros among us.

5. Drink to stupor. Is it the sheer pettiness of wanting to get one's money's worth that would make a passenger drink like a fish? (Remember, its Nigerians we're talking about here). Of course, it's not the drinking that bothers me but the mindless banter and laughter at completely 'unfunny' things that drives me up the Berlin wall (just like that - after a couple of drinks you'd be in stitches when you read 'drive me up the berlin wall').

6. Leaving toilets unlocked. Common sense consistently fails to prevail when most Nigerians use the airline's restrooms. It all boils down to refusing to acknowledge the instructions/directions carefully displayed all around them. It's quite simple - you enter the restroom and close it behind you. Right there on door is a slide lock which denotes 'Slide left to lock and right to open'. Why wouldn't I be interested in making sure that no one accidentally sees my 'bits'? Didn't they notice the green 'vacant' or the red 'occupied' sign before entering the lavatory? At my last count I've walked in on 3 unfortunate passengers who forgot to lock behind (but they all did once I exposed them...makes you wonder, eh?).

7. Sitting ovation. I'm not sure if you can relate but you're nearing your flight destination and as soon as the plane lands successfully passengers around you start to clap until virtually everyone joins in. Why are they doing this, you ask? beats me - for landing safely or for not crashing into the deep blue sea or for getting their money's worth after usurping the mini bar...I dunno. The clapping is cheesy in my opinion. I'd much prefer passengers go one by one to shake the pilot(s) for a job well done plane well-landed.

And coming in at a surprise number 8 is Irregular exercise. Make no mistake about it, Nigerians are terrified about premature death, more so than the average civilian (if that makes any sense). I've seen the most bizarre repetitions performed from kicking mid-air to punching only your left arm over the seat head in the same direction. Deep Vein thrombosis is no laughing matter so I guess all I have to do is close my eyes next time if I don't want to behold seemingly amateurish 'Kung-fu'.

1. Notice how heavy she is breathing.
Orgasms are very intense, so it is nearly
impossible for women to maintain their
regular breathing patterns. If you are trying
to figure out how to know if she’s faking it,
keep in mind that natural breathing usually
indicates that she hasn’t had an orgasm.
2. Pay attention to how many orgasms she
has. Although multiple orgasms are possible,
they aren’t all that likely. If you’re trying
to learn how to know if she’s faking it,
notice whether or not she has multiple
orgasms every time and if so, know that it’s
probably not real.
3. See how long it takes her to function
regularly. This can be one of the easiest
ways to learn how to know if she’s faking it.
An orgasm can really drain a woman’s
energy. If she gets out of bed and goes back
to her daily life only moments later, she’s
probably faking.
4. Take note of how long her orgasm lasts.
Since orgasms only last for a few seconds,
she shouldn’t claim that hers last for minutes
at a time. If you are trying to determine
how to know if she’s faking it, remember
that the length of her orgasm can tell a lot.
5. Consider whether she seems to be acting.
If it feels like you’re having sex with a porn
star, there’s a good chance she’s not being
genuine. Unless she knows you love her to be
loud when you have sex, this can be one of
the easiest ways to know if she’s faking it.
6. Notice if you feel any contractions. If you
really are wondering how to know if she’s
faking it, this is important to keep in mind.
Any time a woman orgasms, you will feel her
vagina contracting, even if it’s not very
strong.
7. Pay attention to her body temperature.
One of the easiest ways how to know if she’s
faking it is to see if she feels really warm
afterwards. Also be sure to notice if her
cheeks have a red, flushed appearance.
8. Sudden perspiration
Hot, sweaty sex? Yes, please. Breaking out
in a sweat means her body is at a high level
of tension and her muscles are working
overtime — her breathing, heart rate and
blood pressure are all up. So, once you both
collapse into a sweaty heap afterward, you’ll
know she’s been pleased.
9. Red lips
This means both sets: Her mouth lips will go a
little redder (lips swell and redden upon
arousal), as will her vaginal lips. While you
are penetrating one set of lips, try to feel
the swelling in the other set of lips that
you’re kissing. Be careful though: Kissing
will also increase the redness of her lips, so
be gentle with pecks so that you can get an
accurate reading of her response level.
10. Dilated pupils
Dilated pupils are another surefire sign that
your girl is reaching her peak. This might be
hard to tell in the dark, but if the lights are
on, all you have to do is ask her to look into
your eyes as she climaxes. Chances are she’ll
be more than willing to oblige to that
romantic request. Just make sure to make
note of what her pupils looked like at the
beginning of your romp so you can compare
their difference in size at the end.....mods abeg if this isn't in the right section pls help me post it to where it belongs thanks

Baba xxxtedyxxx abeg reply my pm...

guys pls is the airtel subscription still working on android?

anambra state university...ansu....sciences 150000...indigene nd otherwise

I took interest in the mustard seed
yesterday.
Not like it was the first time I saw a mustard
seed
But I remembered what the bible said about
the mustard seed, that if your faith be as
little as the mustard seed that you can move
mountains.
I began to wonder, of all the things in this
whole world, a mustard seed?
A situation occurred sometime ago at mgbidi,
imo state
The alleged mysterious water that surfaced,
which was believed to heal people of their
infirmities was actually as a result of the
leakage of a pipe that was channeled to the
bishop’s house.
But people took advantage of the supposed
mysterious water and their diseases were
cured
Why?
Because they had faith in it.
Now, people have started going to another
enugu mysterious water
As a geologist, there is no such thing as
mysterious water, it’s a spring; a thermal
spring
The geographical location of enugu was
actually on top of the hill, in simple terms,
springs are formed when the an aquifer is
filled to the point that the water overflows
onto the land surface.
I respect you religious beliefs, but come on!
we are in the 21st century, not everything
should be labeled ‘divine’,
it’s all science!- Azubuike Coolj Chibuike

they both work hand in hand... With money comes power. ..u can't be powerful without money....

rudedough: If you ever want to prosper in life, don't ever believe this nonsense about dreams.

Dreams are as a result of our mind recalling perceptions of what happened the entire day which it stores for a better Long Term Memory (LTM).

Baba na this ur interpretation sure pass joor

choix007: The game is sexy on my s3...killer and addictive

..how did u unlock it...

I have this game on my s3 but everything is locked....pls how do I unlock them...thanks

hope it won't be late by tomorrow?

plezant: thnk u. I got 6gb till March 2014

...babe pls like seriously u did it nd got six gig?...using his procedures?

rexkexmilan: Yet To Be Blocked, Just Subscribed & It Worked.

which did u subscribe to..?

guys be patient! when bb came in newly they suffered too...now its our turn to suffer...New plan will surely come out for us android users...its just a matter of time.....patience! !!

[quote author=nani.666]oh boy...Airtel wan set men up sha....well...no wahala....my mtn sim dey...den no wise....dem no know sey na this BB plan dey make their Airtel sim sell...their market go drop...as for me...when e happen I go just dey subscribe for the mtn 2k5 plan...I cant shout...I've been looking for an excuse to throway my Airtel sim since[/quote]..bros abeg hows that mtn 2k5 somthing done?

just got these message from airtel! Dear Customer, effective 3rd Dec 2013 AIRTEL BB Plans will cease to function on non BB devices or used as a modem . Thank you

friends I just got this message from airtel..pls help can I still subscribe? ''Dear Customer, effective 3rd Dec 2013 AIRTEL BB Plans will cease to function on non BB devices or used as a modem . Thank you''

Joagbaje: It's called "SPEAKING IN TOGUES" you are the second person shearing such experience with me in one week . Congratulations

...inother words he understands u..so long as u know what u are requesting from him!

God created all things..and I believe he understands all things too...hope u understand?

u can add urs if u remember any!