Pls help me, i got married to my hubby even when i knew he's a drunkard. Thinking that he'll change. Now there is no change. We got our car not quite long and he drives while he's drunk. Pls i don't want to loose him... What can i do to assist him get over it. Serious advise will be welcomed. Thanks

Why did you get married to him in the first place? I'm sorry you have to live with it, because marriage is for better for worse.

@ Inik read n comprehend before responding... i said i thought he'll change. Meanwhile i believe he'll change with my assistance. One of the assistance i thought i cud get comes frm dis forum. So if u av sometin tangible kindly say.... Thanks

Did he say he wanted to change? If not; you made your choice.
If he said so; guide him to get help. A priest, a counselor, someone who have helped with this before.
As for drinking and driving..I would have taken the keys. He could kill both himself, and others.

you can't change a grown man...
Changing has to be his choice if he wills it..
You laid your bed...lie on it!

segun-2011:
@ Inik read n comprehend before responding... i said i thought he'll change. Meanwhile i believe he'll change with my assistance. One of the assistance i thought i cud get comes frm dis forum. So if u av sometin tangible kindly say.... Thanks

y are u gettin urself so worked up,wen u prepare ur own bed shabily then u av got to lie on it.... U thought he was goin to change How old is he now dat u thought he would change Did he show any signs of remose or give u clues of changing his habbit If he dint give u any signs before marriage and u went ahead to tie the knots then lady you are in for wot you are getting cause it would be very very difficult,except he accept christ into his life,that is the only way out. GOD IS THE ONLY WAY!!!

did he promise you before marriage that he was going to change? i'm afraid thers little we can do since we dont know him like you do. you've not told us what you've done about the situation and what results you got. if you havent you can stage an intervention involving people he respects a lot. if nothing seems to work, just assist him with prayers. whether or not he changes. its all in your hands.

Frankly speaking, it is an uphill task changing someone after marriage. Most people are relaxed after marriage and could only change when they make up their mind.
Some over-indulge in alcohol due to emotional or other problems. So sit down with him and find out what the problem is. The both of you can resolve it. When he is sober let him see the danger of over-indulgence in alcohol.Let him see that drunkenness will not only ruin his finances and lead him to steady poverty and death but could destroy his marriage and hurt everyone around him.

Fervent prayers is needed when the urge to take alcohol comes. let him look for substitutes like a snack or fruit when the urge comes and he should stop hanging around those who over-indulge in alcohol.

And two ladies here were wondering if any woman would marry an alcoholic.

OP, what can I say? You need to get him away from "friends" he drinks with. That is step 1. Step 2 is to get him away from alcohol. This is the hard part. I doubt your husband loves you enough to leave alcohol just to make you happy. However, if there is anything like the slightest chance that he can actually do so. Play the: "I will leave you if you don't stop drinking card." Is he a TV or internet person? You can encourage him to watch programmes/videos of what alcohol does to people, maybe his common sense will kick-in.

You married this man, keep thinking on-you-feet of ways through which you can stop his consumption of alcohol and then move to implement them. I guess I need to read threads like this to be more grateful for God's blessings.

Please if you don't drive yet, quickly learn to do so. Take the wheels when you know your husband is too drunk to drive. If he insists, don't travel in the car with him. This is to protect yourself and probably it will sink into him that he is like a beast when he is drunk.

Yes and prayers too. That is always helpful.

poster, pls tell us ur joking wen u say u thought he'd change afta marriage. I realy dnt get. Change becos he's now got a ring on his hand or wat? Before u got married, didnt u attend any relationship/marriage seminar whr dey emphasized dt one shdnt marry a spouse becos one tnks dey wl change for d beta afta marriage? Its just so sad dat u tot a grown man wd toss such a habit cos he got married. Not saying dts nt possible, but i knw thr ar some battles dt are beta avoided.
Dt aside, talk to him abou ur fears and keep praying for him.

U cant change him unless if he's willing to change, alot τ̲̅ȍ consider when chosen a life Partner, even if u stock ur fridge with his brand of drinks he will still go out τ̲̅ȍ catch fun, continue praying 4 God to touch his heart

Y did u marry without thinking,when u were datin him and knew he was a drunk,y dint u give him 2 options 4 him to stop it and u seeing d evidences byond reasonanble doubt dat he has genuinely changed or take a walk .d thing u should have done wen u were datin is now wot ure doin now.by d way how on earth do u think u can change a man dat has totally formed his character.its not even easy to change a 15yr old boy,talkless of a full grown adult,my dear u dint look bfor u leaped,u were 2 carried away by emotions and d fact dat u want to b mrs by fire by force.like my mother wil say when u want to go into marriage be 1o1 percent sure of what ure entering into bfor d deal is signed because no matter how much u complain or wish anoda man to b ur man,theres notin u can do about it. No one will live in d house wit u.now u have entered without being objective,d only option left 4 u to do is prayer.join a good intercessory team in church n pray because drunk men av high tendencies to beat their wives n rape either u or someone else.so bfor it degenerates to dat,pray.nothing in life is static,it either gets better or worse,same applies to ur marriage