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akpors is realy funny (check) - Jokes Etc (2) - Nairaland

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Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by pitipom: 8:05am On Nov 30, 2012
This is good!!nice work mr xela
Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by Nobody: 10:47am On Nov 30, 2012
chakula: Never Scan through your posts but I feel you as nobody want to reply your post! Try harder and convince dudes next time by pasting interesting joke on board.

Guy, stop тo dε̲̣γ 8t. Z jokes funny.
Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 9:06pm On Nov 30, 2012
(26)Wife:If i knew u were this Poor I wuldnt hav
married u!
Akpors:wht do u think I meant when I said u
were d only thing I have
in this world?

1 Like

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 9:08pm On Nov 30, 2012
(27)Teacher: Akpors, assuming you were at a bus
stop and boko- haram throws a bomb.
What will you do?
Akpors: i will jux stop assuming…..

2 Likes

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 9:10pm On Nov 30, 2012
(28)Akpors asked d barber“How much for a
haircut?”
Barber:“N500.
Akpors:“And hw much 4 a shave?
Barber:N50 sir.
Akpos:Very well,shave my head

2 Likes

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 9:24pm On Nov 30, 2012
(28)Akpos who was a houseboy
usually sneaks into his Oga's
room, drinks his wine and
adds water to top it up. One
day his Oga bought a new
wine called pasties, it was a
french wine that changes
colour if water is added onto
it.
Akpos unaware of this,
sneaks into his Oga's room,
drank the new wine and
added water on it.
Immediately it started
changing colour.
Akpos: I am in trouble, big
trouble.
He ran to the kitchen.
Meanwhile, oga and madam
were sitted in the parlour,
while Akpos was in the
kitchen.
...
OGA: Akpos
Akpos: Oga
OGA: who drank my pasties?.
No answer!
OGA: Akpos, who drank my
pasties?.
No answer. Oga walked to
the kitchen and saw Akpos
there.
OGA: Are you insane or
what?. Why when i call, you
say"Oga"but when i ask
you a question you don't
answer me.
Akpos: Oga when you are in
the kitchen you don't
understand anything, except
your name.
OGA: Is that so?. Okay go to
the parlour, stand beside
madam and ask me a
question while i stand here.
Akpos went and did what oga
said.
Akpos: Ogaaaaaa
OGA: Yes Akpos
Akpos: Who goes into the
maid's bedroom when madam
is not at home?.
No answer.
Akpos: Ogaaaaaa!!! You dey
hear me, i say who dey
sneak enter the house girl
room when madam no dey
house.
No answer. Oga runs out of
the kitchen.
OGA: Wonders shall never
end. Akpos, it is true o, when
one is in the kitchen, one
doesnot hear anything,
except one's name.
MADAM: That's not true. It's a
lie.
Akpos: Madam, do you want
to be tested?.
MADAM: Yes
Akpos: Oya enter the kitchen
She enters.
Akpos: Madam
MADAM: Yes Akpos
Akpos: Who is Junior's
biological Father?. Me or Oga
Madam rushed out of the
kitchen
MADAM: This kitchen needs to
be fumigated o, i can't
understand anything at all

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 9:42pm On Nov 30, 2012
(29)Dad: akpors, if Mr John ask of me, tell him am
not around.
How will u tell him when he comes, cos i
know u are funny?
Akpors: when he comes, i will say,my daddy
said i should tell you he is not around.
Dad, idiot! Just tell him, he is not around. Ok?
Akpors: yes dad.
Mr John: Akpors, where is ur dad?
Akpors: he is not around.
Mr john: when is he coming back?
Akpors : wait let me go and ask him he did
not tell me. (Rushed into the room,
shouting,daddy, daddy, when are coming
back?)
Mr John followed him into the room saw the
dad, they started fighting.
Abeg, was that akpors fault?
Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 11:34am On Dec 06, 2012
(30)A guy won a #10 million lottery, kept the
money inside a 'Ghana must go' bag, went
under a tree, buried the money, snapped the
spot and the tree with a camera and decided
to travel to London. As he was on a plane
heading to London, he brought out the
picture from the camera, stared at it and
was shocked to see Akpos on top of the tree
smiling
What would you do if you were the man?

1 Like

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by bashydemy(m): 12:08pm On Dec 06, 2012
Chichi: Do you smoke?
Akpos: Yes
Chichi: How many packs a day?
Akpos: 3 packs
Chichi: How much per pack
Akpos: £10.00
Chichi: And how long have you been
smoking?
Akpos: 15 years
Chichi: So 1 pack cost £10.00 and you have 3
packs a day which puts your spending each
month at £900. In one year, it would be
£10,800 correct?
Akpos: Correct
Chichi: If in 1 year you spend £10,800 not
accounting for inflation, the past 15 years
puts your spending at £162,000 correct?
Akpos: Correct
Chichi: Do you know that if you hadn't
smoked,that money could have been put in
a step-up interest savings account and after
accounting for compound interest for the
past 15 years, you could have now bought a
Ferrari?
Akpos: Do you smoke?
Chichi: No
Akpos: Where's your Ferrari
then

3 Likes

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by chakula: 1:02pm On Dec 06, 2012
bashy_demy: Chichi: Do you smoke?
Akpos: Yes
Chichi: How many packs a day?
Akpos: 3 packs
Chichi: How much per pack
Akpos: £10.00
Chichi: And how long have you been
smoking?
Akpos: 15 years
Chichi: So 1 pack cost £10.00 and you have 3
packs a day which puts your spending each
month at £900. In one year, it would be
£10,800 correct?
Akpos: Correct
Chichi: If in 1 year you spend £10,800 not
accounting for inflation, the past 15 years
puts your spending at £162,000 correct?
Akpos: Correct
Chichi: Do you know that if you hadn't
smoked,that money could have been put in
a step-up interest savings account and after
accounting for compound interest for the
past 15 years, you could have now bought a
Ferrari?
Akpos: Do you smoke?
Chichi: No
Akpos: Where's your Ferrari
then

A wise joke, then I trust my friend you can do more than this. Btw long time!
Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by bashydemy(m): 6:48pm On Dec 06, 2012
chakula:

A wise joke, then I trust my friend you can do more than this. Btw long time!
Chakula long time jare how your end.. na Acada oo
Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by Chibeze(m): 8:55pm On Dec 06, 2012
MR XELA: (15)Akpos was tired of City Girls so went to his
village in search
of a decent girl to pick as a Wife. He got
a real village
Girl, paid her bride prize and brought
her to the City. When he wanted to make
Love to her, he found out that her pubic
hair was too much and asked her to
shave. The Girl said," Sir, I no fit shave
oo! Nah this hair make all di boys wey
dey village dey call me"NKECHI, AFRO
#akpors fainted#
Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by bashydemy(m): 6:45am On Dec 07, 2012
papa Akpos: I learn't your WAEC result is out.
Akpos: Daddy u remember Chidi wey dey carry first for our
whole skul ba? he failed. .
papa Akpos: dats terrible,wat happened?
Akpos: U also remember Tosin wey dey tutor me 4 house ba?
He failed too.
papa Akpos: wats with d poor performance?
Akpos: Daddy I dunno,na so e b oh.
papa Akpos: so hw was Ʊr result?
Akpos : haba daddy, if dem fail, wetin u expect, I be wizard??

1 Like

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 10:24am On Dec 07, 2012
bashy_demy: papa Akpos: I learn't your WAEC result is out.
Akpos: Daddy u remember Chidi wey dey carry first for our
whole skul ba? he failed. .
papa Akpos: dats terrible,wat happened?
Akpos: U also remember Tosin wey dey tutor me 4 house ba?
He failed too.
papa Akpos: wats with d poor performance?
Akpos: Daddy I dunno,na so e b oh.
papa Akpos: so hw was Ʊr result?
Akpos : haba daddy, if dem fail, wetin u expect, I be wizard??
hahahahahhahahahahahahahahaahahahahah
Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 7:09pm On Dec 14, 2012
(31)General Alex has been monitorin d movement
of his
only daughter recently. In fact, he first picks
her calls to confirm d identity of d caller
before handin over d phone to her after
thorough screening. But on one faithful day,
her
boyfriend akpors called and General picked d
call as usual. Watch
out !
General: Hello! May i know you? Caller
(akkpors): sorri i want to speak wit Joy sir.
General: i said who r u nd wht for?
caller (akporssmiley hmmm (after he understood d
situation @ hand),
Okay Sir, i am FRANK EDOHO from WHO WANTS
TO BE A MILLIONAIRE. Joy's friends is presently
on hot seat and needs
her help to answer a question for 2Million
Naira. So the next
voice you hear after is hers, the time starts
now.......
General: ooh am very sorry!!!
Joy! ,Joy!! Pls take ur phone ur friend needs ur
help........... .
caller akpors: The question is when are you
coming Tomorrow?
A. Morning,
B. Afternoon,
C.Evening,
D. Night.
Joy: D.Night.
caller (akporssmiley Are you sure? Final answer?....
Joy: yes am very sure!

2 Likes

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by Donshizzy(m): 7:17pm On Jul 19, 2013
.st.akpors d patron saint of comedians .do ur majic
Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by MRXELA(m): 9:21am On Dec 08, 2014
bck again

1 Like

Re: akpors is realy funny (check) by jbblues24(m): 3:16pm On May 31, 2019
Lavender. Jesus Christ. How do you do it? lipsrsealed

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